Reviewer: nkaur550 (Signed) · Date: October 31, 2018 06:25 AM · On: Only you can make all this world seem right
Fantastic writing
Reviewer: aglaja5 (Signed) · Date: September 24, 2016 03:20 PM · On: Only you can make all this world seem right
I really like the scene at Woody’s when Justin and Jess performed. It’s so good to see Brian surprised and speechless. What I also like a lot is the impression you created that Brian who wanted to be the one in control not only about Justin but also about his feelings for Justin seems to lose this control little by little although he pretends he wouldn’t care. While reading it the first time I wondered why Justin is so reluctant and seems to endure this all, but okay... Now I know. The last scene in this chapter is so heartbreaking, it makes me suffer with Justin. Great story. Thanks!!! Warmest regards, a.
Author's Response: I want to emphasize with Justin's other talents how Brian didn't really know even half of Justin's life, or how they hadn't communicated really well when they were together the first time around. That they were so messed up, Justin hadn't even opened up some important part of his life to Brian.
Reviewer: WhiteSnowFox (Signed) · Date: September 23, 2016 10:28 PM · On: Only you can make all this world seem right
Oh wow, can Brian be more jealous? I don't think so...And poor Justin...Just happy to have any moment with him that he can.
Also, if I may offer a suggestion; you switch point of view very often without any sort of divider which can be hard to keep track of. We'll be in Justin's head, then Brian's, then back and sometimes I'm not sure who it is. Just a small thing.
Anyways, I'm really liking this!! :)
Author's Response: It was mainly Brian's pov, and yes, sometimes Justin's, sorry for the confusion. Something I have to consider next time. Thanks!
Reviewer: YumYumPM (Signed) · Date: September 10, 2016 12:37 PM · On: Only you can make all this world seem right
It's one step forward, three steps backward. Very frustrating.
Author's Response: Yeah, sorry. I hope you will like the next one:)
Reviewer: sophie'smom (Anonymous) · Date: September 10, 2016 07:23 AM · On: Only you can make all this world seem right
Brian in the sex slave business? Justin becomes a doormat to be stepped on? Don't care for either of them right now? For someone who doesn't care he sure is trying real hard to convince himself. Why would Brian be upset that he didn't know about Justin's hidden talent? They fucked not talked.
Author's Response: Brian acknowledged that he really didn't get to know Justin before because they were both had issues. Hope it will change soon. Thank you:)
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