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Endings and Beginnings Book 4
Chapter 7
Mark sat in the café listening to the conversation going on behind him. He pretended to sip his latte but the cup had been empty for over thirty minutes. He stared at the paper, lost in the sound of the voice behind him. He knew that voice. It had answered the phone time and time again over the last few years. He’d always hung up. Hearing this voice always meant it was a bad time to call, but sometimes he had to try. He had to try to steal five minutes here or five minutes there. It wasn’t much but somehow over three years he’d learned to accept it as enough.
“So then what happened?” Emmett asked glad to see Justin so happy.
“He just held me.” Justin smiled. “It just felt right you know? I mean I know we have our share of issues to work out but at that moment it just felt like I had finally come home.” He admitted. Emmett was giddy as he noticed the look of pure bliss on the younger man’s face.
“So is he moving in?” Emmett asked picking up his coffee and motioning for a refill.
“I’m not sure. I mean he’s been staying with us all week but I’m not sure we’re ready for that.” Justin pushed his food around on his plate. He had been trying not to get his hopes up for the last five wonderful days. He’d made that mistake so many times in the past, letting his expectations and hopes out pace Brian’s ability to commit. He refused to make that mistake again. He refused to demand more than Brian could give.
“So how is the sex?” Emmett asked unable to resist.
“Sex was never our problem.” Justin laughed giving Emmett a knowing look. Emmett released a melodramatic sigh frustrated by the lack of details.
“Now, how are the queens on Liberty Avenue suppose to enjoy this little tale without some hot steamy details?” Emmett teased.
“I think most everyone on Liberty Avenue already knows more than enough about Brian and his steamy details.” Justin replied honestly. “Besides letting their imaginations run wild is much more fun.”
“Can’t I, at the very least, mention that little mark on your neck?” Emmett asked as Justin’s hand came up trying to pull his collar once more over the bite Brian had left the night before.
“No.” Justin blushed slightly. Brian had grilled him about the stupid flowers for two days convinced that they were from Max. Justin had assured Brian that Max had no interest in him but Brian had accidentally marked his neck, feigning innocence when Justin accused him a leaving a brand for Max to see.
In all honesty Justin thought it was hot and found himself touching it from time to time. It didn’t hurt, but whenever he looked in the mirror it brought back vivid memories of the hours they had spent in bed once Stephen had fallen asleep. Things were going really well between them. He hoped nothing changed that. It was almost like they were finally catching a break.
“Well I have to run. Vic and I have a reception to throw together tonight.” Emmett complained, but it was obvious that he loved his job.
“Yeah go throw it together.” Justin replied sarcastically knowing Vic and Emmett no doubt had it planned to the smallest detail. Emmett batted his eyes playfully then left Justin to pick up the tab. It was his turn. Emmett had taken care of it the week before.
Justin rose from the booth carrying his ticket to the register. He failed to notice the man quietly leave the booth behind his and follow him to the front. Mark had to get to a meeting. He was making a proposal to Max Collins, Director of the GLC, as well as to the Board. He had no doubt it would be well received just as it had been at PIFA the day before. It was recognition long over due. Justin Taylor-Gold might not give a shit about his husband’s legacy but Mark certainly did and he was going to do whatever it took to make sure no one forgot the talent of Ethan Gold.
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Tyler signed on the dotted line enjoying the way Brian shifted uncomfortably under his gaze. Gardner removed the document and replaced it with the next one perplexed by the obvious tension between the two men. Once all the documents were signed(,) Tyler handed Brian his pen. Brian accepted it and returned it to his pocket.
“Well gentlemen may I suggest that we celebrate?” Gardner offered.
“I have to get back.” Tyler replied sparing Brian the need for an excuse. He gave Brian a smile as he reached for his coat.
“So I guess you’ll be headed to Texas in six months.” He replied as he put on his coat then picked up his brief case.
“Someone will be coming to Texas.” Brian replied his tone professional but the tension upping another degree. Gardner watched as the two men shook hands, the Texan holding on for just a moment too long. Gardner and Tyler shook hands very briefly before the handsome millionaire walked out of the conference room on his way back to the airport.
He and Brian hadn’t really settled anything. So much was still left unsaid. Tyler had no regrets. He’d had a wonderful time with the ad man. He’d had him, shared him, watched him with others, all the things he’d wanted except for one. Ever since learned of Brian’s attachment to the blond he’d been almost obsessed with seeing those two together. He’d wondered what it was that Justin had that had somehow managed to tame the wild beast that Brian Kinney had once been.
Oh well he knew it wasn’t going to happen. Kinney was so protective of Justin. Tyler didn’t want to admit that for the first time in his life he actually felt a little jealous of someone else, but he knew it was true. Somehow poor pathetic little Justin had gotten under Brian’s skin. Maybe it was a pity fuck, but Brian didn’t really seem the type. Tyler knew he would never understand and that somehow he was just going to have to let it go.
He just never really liked leaving a situation where the best man hadn’t won. He’d get another shot at the brunet. He just needed some time to figure out the best strategy.
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Michael sat on his couch holding the book in his hand. Ben had left it. He’d overlooked it in his rush to escape their home. Michael turned it over and over in his hand as he considered how worn it was. He’d never read it before. He had never been much for books without pictures. He had trouble seeing the story in his head without the images. That was why he had always loved comic books. With those he got a great story and pictures to boot.
He’d never heard of this book before. He knew he should return it to Ben but somehow found the thought of letting it go almost unbearable. He held it, continuing to rub the cover and examine the well worn pages. It was like all of Ben’s books. The man read more than any person he’d ever met.
“Great Expectations.” He murmured then opened the book. He didn’t read the back cover. He didn’t want to know what it was about. He wanted to read it just because Ben had obviously read it more than a few times. He wanted to turn the pages, his fingers lingering where Ben’s had once, he wanted to consider the characters as Ben had without any expectations of what might or might not be coming. Something about the title seemed ominous but Michael pushed that thought away.
“Great Expectations.” He mused once more as he considered what those words really meant. He’d had so many expectations, some great some not so great. At one time he had expected that he and Brian would be together. He’d also at one time thought he and Ben would never be apart. So many expectations, having a normal mother, a decent job, a loving partner, an honest life, he saw it now. It was clear to him. He’d sacrificed his most precious expectations for mediocre ones at best.
He settled into the couch and began to read. He knew he didn’t have any answers at the moment but perhaps dealing with someone else’s expectations would help him find a way to recapture some of his own.
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Max popped his head in the door. “Justin.” He called. Justin looked up giving the man a pleasant, albeit forced, smile. Things were still extremely awkward between the two men.
“I have good news.” He quipped.
“Really?” Justin replied trying to sound enthusiastic.
“And since Lindsay wasn’t at the board meeting today I get to tell you myself.” He entered the young man’s office and took a seat across from where Justin was sitting at his desk.
“Well?” Justin placed his pen aside and raised his eyebrows. Max beamed ignoring the tension still lingering between them. This was too good of a moment to ruin with something that would pass in time. Justin felt a part of his grudge soften slightly at the man’s childlike excitement.
“We were just given a huge donation to establish the music wing of the Center.” He announced still smiling like the cat that swallowed the canary.
“Max.” Justin exclaimed truly surprised and thrilled. They had been looking for ways to raise the needed funds and shuffle accounts in the budget in order to hire an architect, but now to think that the donation would cover the expansion. It was overwhelming.
“There’s more.” He stated.
“The anonymous benefactor was a huge fan of a certain violinist who will always be near and dear to your heart.” His voice was soft hoping that Justin would find this news even more exciting than the first.
“Ethan?” Justin asked furrowing his brow. Max nodded.
“So the wing shall be called The Ethan Gold Musical Arts Hall.” He announced boldly. Justin was speechless. He had a sudden image in his head. It was a memory from Italy. Ethan had just performed flawlessly. They had been celebrating and the man had laughingly boasted, “The Ethan Gold Musical Arts Hall or should it be The Ethan Gold Musical Arts Division?” He could hear the man laugh as he lifted his glass in salute before downing the champagne.
“Justin?” Max’s voice finally filtered through. “Are you okay? I mean I hope this pleases you? I thought it would.” He offered suddenly wondering if he had been insensitive to the other man’s feelings. After all he had no idea where Justin was in dealing with the loss of his partner.
“No,” Justin huffed a small laugh. “I was just remembering something Ethan said once. He used to dream that one day he would be so renown, that every university would one day have a hall or division named for him.” Justin paused realizing how proud Ethan would have been to have had this honor, but now he would never know.
“Maybe I should come back.” Max rose and started toward the door sensing the man’s shift in demeanor.
“No.” Justin replied. “It’s hard but that’s life you know?” He offered. Max nodded pausing, unsure of what else he should say.. He wished now that he hadn’t pressed their relationship further. He wished there wasn’t this terrible tension between them, but there was and he felt powerless to be the friend Justin needed right now.
“Well I thought it would only be appropriate that you be included in all the design and planning stages.” Max offered. Justin nodded giving him a sincere smile. He wanted that as well. He wanted to make the area as close to what Ethan would have wanted. He probably couldn’t swing the life size sculpture of the two of them making love at the entrance, which had always been in the musician’s design scheme, but Justin felt certain he could manage the rest of it.
Max realized that Justin needed some time to process the information so he made his way out of the office until Justin’s voice called him back.
“Max,” Max popped his head in once more. “Who donated the money?”
“It was given anonymously.” He replied.
“Yeah I know. I heard you, but I want to thank the person or foundation, so can’t you just let it slip?” He smiled but was surprised when Max’s expression became grim.
“Actually, I can’t.” He replied. “The gentleman who met with us today made it clear that he wasn’t allowed to give out the person’s name so I really don’t have a clue who is doing this.” Max admitted.
“Don’t you think that is odd?” Justin asked feeling a few warning bells go off inside his head.
“Well we are a Gay and Lesbian Center. Some people don’t want to be associated with us even though they support our work.” Max offered. Justin accepted the explanation but it still didn’t help him let go of his uneasy feeling.
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Chris Hobbs sat at the conference table enjoying his position as the company founder’s son. He loved how all the old fucks who had slaved away each year to earn their paultry money and to work in their shitty little drab offices lined up to kiss his ass and shake his hand. He actually was in mid fantasy about having someone kiss his ass when his father’s voice caught his attention.
“We need a new concept in this area of the market? I don’t understand why we are behind the curve, but I expect some action immediately!” Chris gazed out watching all the pathetic little suck ups pull out their PDA’s and start frantically looking for shortcuts to get ahead of the curve.
He glanced up at his father and realized that the older man was enjoying the frantic panic as well. He gave his son a wink which Chris replied with a nod. The two rose and headed out of the conference room leaving the underlings to get that plan in place.
“So, tell me about this girl?” His father placed his arm around his son’s shoulder.
“She’s got tits like mountains.” Chris bragged.
“That’s my boy.” Mr. Hobbs laughed giving Chris’ shoulder and hard slap. Chris winced at his father’s acceptance having long since realized the cost.
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Brian was waiting for Justin when he pulled into the driveway.
“Hey.” He walked down the steps.
“You forget your key?” Justin asked as he worked to release Stephen’s car seat.
“No, just wanted to wait for you.” Brian admitted taking Mini Me and following Justin up the steps. Stephen laid his head down on Brian’s shoulder.
“Is he okay?” Brian asked as Justin glanced back.
“I think he’s just hungry. He was fussy all the way home. He said he felt okay.” Brian kissed the baby’s forehead.
“He’s hot.” He offered. Justin stopped his progression into the kitchen and came back to check his son. Feeling his forehead he realized that Brian was right.
“I’ll get the thermometer.” He made his way into the bedroom. “Can you get him some juice?” Brian made his way into the kitchen and grabbed a juice box. Stephen accepted it and drank it down quickly. Justin appeared and slid the digital under the baby’s arm.
“Don’t you usually take that someplace else?” Brian offered.
“This will be accurate enough. I just add a degree.” Justin explained as the thermometer began beeping. Brian marveled that Justin knew these things. He had a five year old and didn’t know these things. “Shit.” Justin cursed softly. “It’s 102.” He reached for the phone and quickly dialed a number.
“Justin, maybe it’s just a little virus.” Brian offered.
“The office isn’t closed yet. They stay until 6 on Fridays. Maybe Dan can work me in.” Brian raised one eyebrow as Justin began speaking to someone on the phone. He hung up and reached for Stephen. “They’ll stay until I can get there but I need to hurry.”
Brian continued to hold Stephen moving toward the door. “Then let’s go.” He replied already out on the porch. “Let’s go see Dan.” He emphasized the name causing Justin to glance over in his direction.
The pediatrician’s office was still crowded as the two men entered carrying Stephen who was sleeping.
Justin walked to the counter and signed in as Brian surveyed the room still filled with exhausted looking parents and crying babies most of which were about Stephen’s age. They made their way over to two empty seats and settled in for a long wait.
“Is he your son?” One of the mother’s asked Justin as she pointed to the baby. Justin nodded and smiled. “He looks just like you.” She returned his smile as her eyes considered the dark haired man holding the baby. Justin watched as she tried to process it. He reached over and laid his hand on Brian’s thigh keeping his gaze locked on the woman. It was then that she finally caught on and looked away. He shook his head slightly as he turned back and met Brian’s knowing gaze.
“Was that necessary?” Brian asked. Justin gave him a small smile before rolling his eyes and admitting that it wasn’t necessary but it had been fun.
Brian held Stephen away from his body as Justin removed his jacket. Staring straight ahead his eyes locked with one of the fathers who quickly looked away. There was something familiar about this man, Brian just couldn’t put his finger on it. Justin noticed where Brian was staring and took in the other man’s appearance. It took him a moment to place him.
“Stephen Taylor.” The nurse called.
“That was quick.” Brian commented looking around the room at the other waiting parents. Justin shrugged and reached for his son. Brian followed the two blonds into the exam room.
The nurse took down the symptoms then disappeared.
“How’d we get in so quick?” Brian asked as he began looking through the doctor’s drawers pulling out pieces of equipment.
“I never wait long. I guess those other people have different doctors. There are like eight in the practice.” Brian nodded accepting the explanation.
“Did you see the guy—“
“Baths.” Justin replied as he felt Stephen waking in his arms. Brian glanced over. “One of the only times we played in a room.” Justin stated. Brian remembered now the guy had wanted to do Justin but that was against the rules so they’d found other ways to keep things interesting. “I hate running into people like that when I’m with Stephen.” Justin admitted. “I expect to walk in and find an old trick as his second grade teacher.” There was a light knock on the door then it opened. Brian was leaning against the counter facing the door with Justin sitting off to the side holding the baby.
The doctor was in his mid thirties, dark hair, natural tan, brown eyes, medium built and gave off a resounding ping. Brian watched as Dan’s face fell for a moment before brightening back up at the sight of Justin and Stephen.
“There are my guys.” He greeted the two Taylors.
“Hey Dan. This is Brian Kinney.” Dan acknowledged the ad man politely but gave him no lingering attention.
“So what’s going on with Stephen?” Dan watched as Justin moved the baby to the examining table. Stephen clung to his father, his face flushed as he began to cry. “He has a fever.” Justin spoke over his son’s screams.
Brian had to admit the doctor was good. He managed to sooth the baby while assessing his health. He handed the baby back to Justin.
“It’s viral.” He replied. “I’ve seen it all day. He’ll need to stay home for a couple of days. Just do the usual temperature routine, but if it goes up and doesn’t respond to Tylenol, call me. You still have my home number?” He offered. Justin gave a quick nod. Brian found this very interesting.
“So there’s nothing he can take besides Tylenol?” Dan shook his head in response.
“Sorry Justin. It will pass. Keep him hydrated. Also bring him back on Wednesday, it can cause an ear infection on the backend so let’s catch it early if we can.” Justin nodded as he began putting Stephen’s jacket back on.
It was only then that Dan turned to consider the man leaning against the counter. He’d seen him before at Babylon. He’d watched him in the backroom a few times. He would never have put these two together. Dan seldom frequented the clubs but each time he was there he’d noticed this man. He seemed to get around quite a bit.
“So, “ He just couldn’t resist. ”You and Justin are friends?” Brian had watched the way Dan looked at Justin, there was a reason Justin never waited long to get in, Dan had a huge thing for the blond Glancing down, Brian decided maybe it wasn’t such a huge thing after all.
“Brian and I are living together.” Justin explained glancing at Brian to permission. Brian gave him a tongue in cheek smile that clearly stated his confusion at Justin’s need to tell people their private business but that he didn’t mind what he had revealed.
“Oh.” Dan replied. “Well that’s nice. Two Daddies again for Stephen.” He noted something in Stephen chart then smiled over in Justin’s direction. “Just call me if you need anything. I’m not on call tonight but Stephen’s special.”
“Thanks Dan. You’re a life saver.” Justin replied as Brian retrieved the baby from his arms. He stared at the doctor making it clear where the lines were drawn. Dan gave him a slight nod indicating that he had gotten the message.
Once he left the two men headed out of the room meeting the woman from the waiting area as she was being escorted into the room across from them.
“You saw Dr.Eavers?” She asked.
“Yeah.” Justin replied confused himself to see that they had been taken back before the woman and her child. They moved out of the doctor’s offices and into the main lobby.
“That was weird.” Justin still seemed confused but grateful.
“I don’t think Stephen is the only one that Dr. Dan thinks is special.” Brian stated trying his best to sound nonchalant but failing miserably. Justin hid his laughter behind his efforts to put Stephen into his car seat. The sight of Brian being jealous was one he never thought he’d live to see.
Justin settled behind the steering wheel and pulled out of the parking lot.
“So we’re living together.” Brian stated staring straight ahead. His tone was questioning. Justin glanced over for a second before he replied.
“Well I guess I could have just called you my special friend.” He tried to keep it light. He wasn’t sure how Brian was feeling. So much had happened over such a short time Justin wondered when the man would finally realize that it was time to self destruct.
“No, Stephen’s the special one.” Brian stated tongue in cheek as he threw a look back at the ‘special one’ who was on the verge of crying once more.
“So are we?” Justin asked taking advantage of the opportunity while it lasted. After his conversation earlier with Emmett he’d found that he really needed an answer to that question.
“Are we what?” Brian feigned ignorance.
“Are we living together?” Justin asked his voice sounding hopeful. It reminded Brian so much of the way it had sounded the night Brian had told him that it had to be his choice. Justin had to choose if he would stay at the loft or be with Ethan. Brian paused wishing for the millionth time he could have had the night back. Then he smirked as he realized that he did have it back. His wish had been granted.
“Yeah.” He replied. “We’re living together.” He glanced over and met Justin’s blinding smile. He wondered for a moment if he had said those words, ‘We’re together’ three years ago, if Justin would have been this happy, would have thrown fiddle fuck aside and never left for New York? He knew he would never really know the answer to that question but he knew what he had right now.
Stephen burst out screaming in the backseat as Justin turned on a Seasame Street CD in the player, Brian couldn’t help but laugh as he watched the houses race by. There was something so sane to all this insanity.
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