Midnight Whispers
QAF Brian and Justin Fanfiction
Endings and Beginnings

Chapter 19


Emmett saw Justin standing in the hall outside the daycare with an extremely attractive man leaning in talking with him. He couldn’t help but notice that the man standing with Justin was built very similar to another dark haired, tall, handsome man that Justin was known to spend time with now and again. Emmett made his way over smiling curious as to who the man was.


“Justin?” He questioned. Justin looked around the other man and upon seeing his friend he broke into a smile.


“Hey Em.” He greeted enthusiastically. Emmett threw a glance in tall dark and gorgeous’ direction hoping that Justin would take the hint. Never one to be slow on the up take Justin continued smoothly. “This is Max Collins, my new boss. Max this is Emmett Honeycutt.” Emmett nodded.


“It’s nice to meet you.” Max extended his hand. Emmett accepted it then smiled over at Justin making his appreciation of the handsome man evident. Justin swallowed his laugh. Emmett had missed Justin over the years. He’d always had a good time with him.


“VERY nice to meet you as well.” Emmett gushed wondering whether the man was seeing anyone at the moment.


“I just put Stephen in the daycare.” Justin said interrupting his friend before Emmett could embarrass them both. Emmett noted the anxiety on Justin’s face and immediately went empathetic.


“Want me to peek in and see how he is doing?” Emmett asked.


“Would you?” Justin asked sounding relieved. He hadn’t wanted to admit his apprehension to his new boss but had been dying to look himself. Stephen had cried when he had first left him, but now he couldn’t hear him.


“I have to go in and talk to Teresa anyway.” Emmett admitted. “I’ll keep an eye on him ok?”


“Will you know—“Justin started but Emmett’s look stop him.


“Which one he is?” Emmett finished Justin’s sentence. “You are kidding right?” He walked past Justin giving his hand a squeeze. “If there are any problems I’ll come get you.” He gave Max one last look of approval before disappearing into the daycare.


“Well let’s go take a look at the area we have set aside for the art center and then discuss your new position and my expectations.” Justin nodded following Max up the stairs to his office.


Once he heard the two men leave the hall, Emmett couldn’t help himself. He peeked back out watching the two men head up the staircase. He wondered if Brian had any idea how good looking Justin’s new boss was. Once Justin was back on the market something told Emmett that Max Collins had every intention of shopping for the blonde.


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When Ken arrived home from his office Rachel was already there.


“You’re home.” Ken entered the kitchen setting his briefcase on the counter.


She continued stirring the pot on the stove never looking up. Ken was curious about her meeting with the lawyer but really didn’t want to bring it up. He still believed that she was wrong. From her mood he was hoping that her attorney had discouraged her from pursuing the matter.


“How was your day?” He asked as he got out plates and began setting the table.


“Okay.” She reported sounding tired. He went over to her at the stove and wrapped his arms around her waist.


“Come on give.” He whispered to her. He felt her slump against him. He had been right she had gotten bad news.


“I saw an attorney today. His name is Wilbur Davis.” She continued working on the sauce.


“Was he nice?” He asked.


“Not really.” She said pulling slightly away. “But he is good at what he does and that is much more important.” She sighed. “Besides what do you care? You’re leaving if I pursue this anyway right?” She knew that she sounded defensive but she really couldn’t help it. Ever since Ken had returned and made his position known she had felt torn between her love for Ken and her loyalty to her brother.


“Rach.” He kissed her neck. She relaxed a little.


“He said I’ll win.” She didn’t sound as happy as he had thought she would. He felt his stomach tighten at the thought of her taking Justin’s child from him.


“You don’t sound too happy.” He mentioned moving away. She noted he absence and reminded herself that it was a feeling she would have to get use to.


“He said that in order to win we will have to destroy Justin. He seemed eager for it. It sort of made me feel sick. He really hates homosexuals. Every time he said Justin’s name it was as if he were spitting something nasty out of his mouth.” She paused. Ken forced himself to remain quiet. Seeing that he wasn’t about to add any commentary Rachel continued on, “He said we would also have to discredit his relationship with my brother. We would have to tell the world that Ethan talked me into having Stephen just so that he could keep Justin from going back to Brian Kinney.” Ken marveled at the lack of emotion in Rachel’s voice. It was as if she were talking about people that she didn’t know. She seemed emotionally detached. Ken wondered for a moment if this was how military officers discussed the casualties in war. It was then that Rachel’s words began to take hold. He felt a hot coal begin to burn somewhere deep inside.


“What do you mean to keep Justin from going back to Brian? Is that really why you had Stephen?” He asked. She had alluded to this before but he had always believed that there had to have been other reasons for her decision to conceive for your brother and his partner. His brow was furrowed and his eyes bore into the woman.


“Yeah it is.” She dropped the spoon and faced him suddenly defiant. “He was so scared he was about to lose Justin. He said he really needed this. They really needed a child. He knew Justin had always wanted one. He was so desperate. I couldn’t tell him no.”


“Rachel you realize that if you have to testify to that under oath that one day Stephen will find out as well.” Ken couldn’t believe that she was telling him this. He suddenly felt even more sympathetic for Justin. “So let me see if I have this right.” He moved further away from her leaning against the opposite counter. ”Ethan thought Justin was still in love with this Brian Kinney guy so he talks you into giving them a baby, knowing Justin wants one, even though Ethan couldn’t have given a lesser shit. You felt sorry for your brother so you went along with the plan. Now your brother is out of the picture, but you’ve decide that you want the baby back, because Justin did go back to Brian Kinney.” Rachel pursed her lips into a thin straight line. Ken felt like he had just learned the woman he loved was a space alien.


“You make it sound—“


“Like Ethan used Justin’s emotions to manipulate him where as you are choosing to discount them altogether. Nice Rachel. REAL NICE!” He had heard enough. He pushed off of the counter and stormed into the bedroom no longer hungry.


“Ken!” She yelled after him.


“I don’t even fucking know you. He’s lost his partner. He’s about to learn that his partner used his son to manipulate him.” He paused marveling at the depth of malice the Gold children were capable of inflicting. “You only want this kid to avenge some sick hang-up Ethan had about Justin being with this Kinney guy. This is fucked Rachel. It’s so fucked. You’re going to let that mercenary of a lawyer you’ve hired put him on the stand and assassinate him all while he is still mourning your brother?” He slammed the bedroom door.


Rachel ran to it. He had it all wrong. That wasn’t why she wanted Stephen. He was her son. He was making it sound so much worse that it was. She reached for the door knob. Realizing that it was locked, she began hammering on it.


“Ken, open this door. Talk to me! You have it all wrong.” The door suddenly flung open. Ken appeared with his suitcase and hang up bag. Rachel stood her mouth open in shock.


“You’re leaving me? Now?” She demanded. “We aren’t even going to talk about this? What do you care what I do to Justin? You even said once you didn’t always feel comfortable around Ethan or Justin.” She railed as he made his way to the front door.


“That’s right. I have a little hang-up there, but I realize that it is MY problem, not theirs.” He ranted. “Rachel, what you are doing is wrong. If you can’t see that, well, you’re blind. There is absolutely nothing left to discuss. If you decide to come to your senses and start acting like the woman I fell in love with then call me otherwise have a nice life.” He walked out.


She stood there stunned. How could he side against her? Was she really being cruel? Ethan wouldn’t want his son with Kinney. She was just honoring her brother’s wishes. She quickly made her way back to the bedroom. Throwing herself down on the bed she wept. She missed her brother. She desperately needed to talk to him. He would know exactly what to say to help her know what to do. Tears came until she thought they would never stop. When she finally was cried out she turned on her side. There on her nightstand was a picture of Ethan, Justin and Stephen.


“Ethan, what should I do?” She asked the smiling image. The silence that came in reply started her tears once more.


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Ken was in his car racing to some unknown destination. He had no idea where he would spend the night but it certainly wouldn’t be in that apartment. He wasn’t sure what had happened to Rachel. She had turned from a fairly compassionate person into an unfeeling selfish bitch. He was shocked at her callous attitude. He had to admit that part of his reason for siding with Justin had to do with his own lack of interest is being a father. He like Stephen fine, but had no intentions of being the kid’s dad.


He pulled off the side of the road to collect his thoughts. He knew what he had to do. He reached into his pocket and pulled out his cell phone. Sorting through the stored numbers in the menu he selected the one he needed. He felt unsure for a moment as he waited. He was about to either save his relationship with Rachel or end it once and for all. Either way he knew he had to do what was right.


“Hello?” He heard the familiar voice.


“Justin. It’s Ken. Don’t hang up. We have to talk.”


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Justin had just gotten off of the phone with Ken when the phone rang again. He grabbed it hoping it wouldn’t wake Stephen.


“Hello?” He answered knowing he felt as tired as he sounded.


“Hey Sunshine.” Brian’s voice brought a smile to Justin’s face.


“What has you calling so late? Slim pickings at Babylon?” The blond laid his head down on the couch and stretched out.


Brian suddenly felt uncomfortable. How had Justin known he had gone to Babylon? He had even found a trick with the same coloring as the man he had really wanted to be with that night. He had taken the guy to the backroom but had lost interest when the guy had started kissing him. It just wasn’t the same. Brian had settled for a mediocre blow job and then left.


“Brian?” Justin asked wondering at the sudden silence on the other end of the line.


“Yeah.” Brian sounded uncomfortable.


“It’s okay. I know you still trick.” Justin admitted hoping to end the man’s discomfort.


“I didn’t call to tell you about my latest trick.” Brian stated firmly closing that topic completely. “I called to see how the first day went for you and for Mini Me.” Brian paused.


“It was okay. Max is nice. We are going to work well together. Stephen had a few tough moments but he came through it okay I guess.” Justin sounded exhausted. Brian wondered if he was sleeping alright.


“It will get easier for him.” Brian reassured the other man. Justin hated thinking about leaving Stephen so instead he decided to get Brian’s opinion on his conversation with Ken.


“I just had the most interesting talk with Rachel’s boyfriend, Ken.” Brian sat up on the side of his bed.


“Justin do you think you should be talking to him with everything that is happening?” He rubbed his hand over his face.


“Probably not but I’m glad I did.” Justin smiled. “Do you want to know what he said or are you just going to lecture me on the dos and don’ts of custody cases.” He was smiling and hoped Brian could tell.


“Hey once a stupid twat always a stupid twat who am I to waste my breath.” Brian made his way into his kitchen to get some water.


“Exactly.” Justin returned broadening Brian’s smile. He had missed talking to Justin so much. Now it was even better than before. Justin was more confident and harder to offend. “So?” Justin asked.


“What did Rachel, who from this point forward will be referred to as ,“The Bitch”’s boyfriend have to say?” Brian sat down on his bed then leaned back getting comfortable. He caught himself looking at what had been Justin’s side and wished he was there now.


“Ken, his name is Ken.” Justin corrected.


“Ok so what did the Bitch’s Ken say?” Brian quipped.


“Well he just moved out of their apartment because he thinks what she is doing is shit.” He waited, but Brian was silent, so Justin continued. “He said that when they first met and she told him about the baby that he had been really concerned about getting involved with her. He didn’t want kids any time soon but Rachel assured him that the baby was ours and she didn’t want to have anything to do with him.”


“No shit?” Brian asked laughing. “Stupid Bitch.”


“There’s more.” Justin teased.


“Don’t be a tease.” Brian deadpanned.


“He also said that –“ He paused as he processed what he knew now was fact and not just mere speculation. He kept his voice steady trying to hide any of the hurt he felt. “He said that she admitted that Ethan had talked her into having the baby so that I wouldn’t go back to you. She agreed to help out Ethan because he was desperate.” He paused. He tried to remember what those days had been like. He had been set to come back to the Pitts. Justin felt angry and sad thinking about Ethan’s desperation and the way he had been so easily manipulated by the man.


‘Motherfucker’ Brian thought. He hated that little shit for treating Justin this way. He couldn’t imagine what it must have felt like for Justin to hear that Ethan was as good at playing his partner as he was at playing his violin? He wanted to say something to Justin to ease his pain but was clueless what that would be at the moment.


“He also said that he was sure that the only reason Rachel is going after Stephen is because she doesn’t want me back with you because of Ethan. It is like her fucked up way of honoring Ethan’s memory.”


“Key words ‘fucked up’. This is good Justin. Would he testify?” Brian asked.


“He said he would. The bad news is that she has an attorney now. It is some homophobic asshole—“


“I didn’t know your dad practiced law?” Brian returned. Justin laughed and Brian felt better hearing it.


“He couldn’t take the case. Conflict of interest I think. He would want to win so that I wouldn’t be a queer anymore. Anyway this guy’s name is Wilbur Davis ever heard of him?” He asked.


“No.” Brian said softly filing the name away. He would give Melanie a call tomorrow and find out about him.


“Well according to Ken he told her today that she would win.” There was a long pause. Brian sighed allowing his head to fall forward. He knew those words had cost Justin dearly.


“All lawyers say that because they want clients, but someone has to lose. My money is on the Bitch.” Brian said. Justin was quiet for a moment longer.


“The guy told her that he would have to discredit my relationship with Ethan. Ken said it seemed that Rachel was really dreading that part of it.”


“Yeah, well how do you honor your brother’s memory while saying his relationship with his lover was shit.” Justin knew what Brian was saying but still the words cut through him. He couldn’t imagine hearing as much in a court room.


“He’ll also discredit me. I’m sure dig around in my past.”


“There’s not much to find.”


“Well some but not much.” Justin admitted. “I mean I did fuck around a lot when we were playing the game.”


“If fucking around precludes men from being a parent no one would have a father.” Justin smirked but was still worried about what Wilbur might find out about him.


“He’s probably going to come after you as well. He’ll probably paint you as some—“


“Child molester?” Brian finished.


“Yeah, and me as some obsessive compulsive nut who couldn’t leave you alone.” There was a long pause. They were both thinking about their past. Justin was the first to break the silence. “You weren’t you know. I was of age and I wanted to be with you.”


“I know that. I just hate all of this shit.” Justin felt terrible. He was once again disrupting the older man’s life. It wasn’t fair to him. Brian had been so kind and supportive since Ethan’s death. This seemed like a terrible way to repay his kindness.


“Justin?” Brian asked after a prolonged silence. Justin had been fairly excited about what Ken had said. He had seen it as a way of exposing Rachel’s real motives, but now that he truly considered all that Ken had revealed he was feeling insecure again. He hadn’t really stopped to consider what Brian would have to endure during the hearing. It would be yet another character assassination for the man, just like the one the press had put him through after the bashing. Justin knew it was wrong for Brian to have to endure all of that again.


“Brian I think maybe you should just steer clear of us for awhile.” Justin said softly. It was going to get ugly and he didn’t want Brian being hurt.


“Why?” He felt hurt. He knew why. He knew that he would hurt Justin’s case. He knew if he was out of the picture Justin would have a much better chance of keeping Stephen. As much as he understood it all, it still hurt. He hated feeling like he was something that Justin had to hide or be ashamed of. ‘Fuck that’ he thought. Maybe Justin could handle hiding away like someone’s shameful secret, but he was Brian Kinney for fuck sake. He hid for on man.


“You know what? Don’t answer that.” Brian spat suddenly angry at his dismissal. “You want me gone. You got it.” He hung up before Justin could say another word. Justin felt so alone at that moment. He knew from Brian’s tone that the older man had misunderstood. Communication or lack there of had been their problem three years ago, Justin was determined to avoid that pitfall again. At the moment though he wasn’t sure he had the energy to call the man back, let alone to try and explain that he hadn’t mean to hurt Brian but protect him.


Justin had no idea why life had to be so complicated.


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