Midnight Whispers
QAF Brian and Justin Fanfiction

 

 

This above all – to thine own self be true,

And it must follow, as the night the day,

Thou canst not then be false to any man. ”

 

 

A content and sincere smile appeared on Brian’s face as he closed the diner’s door behind him and stepped onto the street. It was good to see that boy again, he had to admit, though this fact surprised him; he’d never thought that the sight of someone alone would get him in such a good mood. But still, seeing a face like that was the best way to start a day.

And what a busy day he had to face; he tried to get his thoughts together as he was hurrying towards the studio. He was starving as hell but there was no way he’d start eating on the street. He could hardly wait to get to his destination, though he knew very well how pissed the others would be at him for being late again. It wasn’t the first time he’d been late but he couldn’t help it; he said that it wasn’t his fault that nights were more suitable for him than days. He’d never been late for the performances and he thought that that was what really mattered.

When he entered the studio he found his colleagues sitting on the chairs, waiting for him impatiently.

“At last!” He heard Michael, “Never mind the fact that we’ve been waiting for you for more than an hour.” The disapproval in his voice was evident.

“Okay, I don’t mind.” Was Brian’s answer and he gave his friend a fake smile.

Debbie, a friendly middle-age woman was approaching Brian, chewing on a piece of gum intensely. She was Michael’s mother and an important member of the company, though she didn’t play on stage. But she helped the boys in every way she could; she sewed most of the costumes herself and tried to get all the supplies and everything else the actors needed. She even tried to materialize Emmett’s wild imagination when it came to the flamboyant man’s costumes. Beyond that she was the mother of this company; always willing to give the actors as much love and support as possible.

She stopped in front of Brian, looked up his face and added in a sarcastic tone, “How nice to have you here Mr. Wonderful. Care to start working?”

“I’ll have to eat first.” He held up the paper bag in his hands, “I’m fucking hungry.”

“Great. Eat then.” She rolled her eyes and motioned towards a chair.

“Hurry up Brian; we’ve got a lot of work to do.” Ted patted Brian’s shoulder.

Ted was a great actor but he’d been doing plenty of other things as well for the company. WILL-power didn’t have an “official” director but if they’d had one, it would have been Ted. He’d been taking control and good care of almost everything. And though he knew that Brian was pretty autonomous and hard to deal with, he appreciated the man because he had a big heart, though he tried to hide it. And besides that he was an extremely talented actor in Ted’s opinion. Ted waited patiently until Brian finished his breakfast. Then he started to gather the actors together.

 

***

 

Justin couldn’t forget about his unexpected visitor in the morning, though he’d been desperately trying to concentrate on anything else but the man. But it seemed to be impossible for him. Later that day, when he was standing in front of a blank canvas while having a lesson at PIFA, all he could imagine to appear on that white material was the actor’s unforgettable face.

He felt kind of guilty about this whole thing because every time he thought of the man he felt like he’d been cheating on Ethan. He found this thought ridiculous, but still he didn’t think it was right to daydream about a stranger, no matter how beautiful he was, when he was in a steady relationship. He knew that Ethan trusted him and he didn’t want to change that for a quick fuck. Because that was what Brian wanted from him, nothing more; he was sure about that.

No matter how hard he tried to convince himself he couldn’t get that man out of his head. When his conscience couldn’t take it anymore, he called Ethan’s cell to ask him if he wanted to go out with him later that evening.

“I’d love to Jus, but you know that I’ve got only a few days left ‘til the contest. I’ll be at Darren’s place tonight and he’ll help me to get prepared for it.”

“I could help you too.” Justin tried weakly.

“You’re too sweet Jus, but Darren is a musician. He knows better than anybody what the judges will expect from me.”

“Okay.” Justin tried to manage the most casual voice but Ethan noticed his disappointment.

“Don’t do this; you know how important it is to me.”

“Yeah, I know exactly.”

“But you go, and have fun. You could ask Daphne to go with you. I’ll be late.”

“Fine. Bye then.” He tried to hang up but Ethan stopped him.

“Bye…and Jus?”

“Yeah?”

“I love you.”

Justin sighed and gave the reply that was supposed to be given, “You too.” And he hung up.

On his way home from college Justin stopped at a store because he decided to forget about all of his problems. He wanted to forget about neglectful, narcissistic boyfriends and assertive but attractive strangers. He thought he’d found the best solution and bought himself a large bottle of gin. He didn’t care about anything else.

It was late night and Ethan still hadn’t arrived home. Justin was sitting on that old couch in their apartment, sipping the alcohol slowly but steadily. He thought about calling Daphne but he wasn’t really in the mood for company so he changed his mind.

The intense effect of that strong drink had started to work and Justin could feel his whole body burning, like it was in flames. As he stood up he felt dizziness overwhelming him so he started to rub his face slowly. After a few minutes he decided to go for a little walk so that the cool air would help to sober him. He staggered toward the door, grabbed his coat and left the flat.

He felt much better as the fresh air hit his face but walking still seemed to be pretty hard for him. He took deep breaths and tried not to trip over anything; it wasn’t an easy thing for him at the moment, considering his drunken state. Without realizing it he was getting closer and closer to that certain theatre studio.

 

Brian hoped to recognize a familiar blond head in the audience but it seemed like the boy hadn’t come to see the performance. For some reason Brian was sure to see him that night but he was obviously wrong. Though Brian thought that he seemed to be interested in the new play in the morning, Justin was nowhere to be seen. But oh well, it was not the first time the boy had disappointed him and he told himself he wouldn’t care about him anymore. The eager admirers were standing in line anyway.

The play was a huge success and it made him forget, for a while at least, about the blond. He changed his clothes in the dressing room and headed toward the exit to join his friends for a drink at Woody’s. When he stepped onto the street the usual crowd greeted him but he wasn’t in the mood for tricking; a large amount of Beam and a peaceful sleep was all he wanted that night.

Getting through the crowd he stopped and watched the end of the street. He saw a slim figure walking slowly in a somewhat uncoordinated way. He couldn’t see clearly who it was but he had a strange feeling that it was the blond he’d been looking for the whole evening.

“Go ahead; I’m coming a bit later.” He said to his friends and without even waiting for their reply he started to walk the blonde’s way.

When he was close enough to see the boy’s face he smiled and stopped in front of him.

“Hey.”

Justin was staring at the man blankly, not really aware of where he was and why he seemed to always run into the person he was trying to escape from. The dizziness came back with full force, and he was struggling to say the words, “Oh...hey.”

Brian could see how drunk the boy was and he couldn’t help smiling.

“What are you doing here?”

Justin blinked a few times then answered really slowly, “Nothin’…just...walking…” As he said it, he staggered and almost fell but Brian caught him and held him firmly.

“Yeah, I can see that.” He said with a quiet chuckle, “I think you should go home.”

Justin raised his head to look into the man’s eyes and even in this dizzy state he could realize how close they stood to each other and how good it felt for him.

“No, I’m…okay…” He mumbled quietly.

“Yeah, right. Where do you live? I’ll go with you.” Brian’s words slowly entered Justin’s mind and he could feel a wide grin crossing his face.

“Why? You wanna fuck me?”

Brian sighed and raised an eyebrow at the boy, “I want you to get home safely.”

“Oh…” The boy remained silent for a moment then motioned toward the opposite direction, “…that way…I think…”

“Let’s go little boy.” Brian tried to pull the blond with him.

“I’m not a little boy…my name…is…” He stopped like he had to think about it.

“Yeah?” Asked the man with a smile.

“My name is…Justin…” He answered with a victorious look on his face.

“Okay Justin. Let’s go.”

Brian grabbed Justin’s waist and they started to walk together; Brian hoped that the boy was sober enough to remember where he lived. Justin was hanging onto the strong and warm body next to him and he couldn’t help asking that question again, which under sober circumstances he wouldn’t have been brave enough to ask…

“Don’t you want to fuck me?”

Brian laughed quietly and held the boy more firmly because he seemed to get heavier with every minute, “I don’t take advantage of tipsy little boys.”

“That’s very…” Justin stopped as he tripped over his own foot, “…nice of you.”

They walked in silence for a few minutes then the blond looked at the man with an annoyingly smug wide smirk; Brian knew that he had something on his mind so he asked impatiently, “What?”

“Say something nice to me.”

“What??” Brian asked again in disbelief with a questioning look on his face, while trying to carry the boy with him. He wished he’d come by car that morning but the studio was so close to his place he didn’t think he would need it.

Justin went on, “I want to hear nice words…very, very nice words…Shakespeare’s words.”

“I don’t do quotes when I’m not on stage, remember?” Answered Brian sternly, “Ask your boyfriend.”

“I can’t. He’s not a Shakespeare actor.”

“So what? You could buy him a book; that’s if he can read.”

“But that’s not the same. Besides, he can’t…he can’t…”

“He can’t what?”

“He can’t give me what I need. At least not in the way I want it.”

Brian raised an eyebrow again and asked, “What do you mean?”

“Ummm…nothing. Forget it.”

But Brian didn’t want to forget about that. This boy didn’t seem to be in a happy relationship. And Brian knew better than anyone else that drunken people were the most honest.

“And what’s he going to say when he sees you like this?”

“He’s not at home. He’s getting prepared for a huge contest; he’s a violinist you know.”

“Ah, I see. Another artist; how romantic.” Brian said sarcastically.

“We’re here.” Justin stopped and pointed his finger at a huge, dark building.

“Are you sure?” Brian asked with an amused expression. The place didn’t seem too friendly to him.

“Yeah. Look.” The boy held his key and tried to insert it into the keyhole, but he didn’t succeed.

Brian chuckled and said quietly, “Let me help you.”

He leaned closer to Justin and took the key from his hand. The blond closed his eyes and enjoyed that now familiar and exciting scent he’d always sensed on this man. He enjoyed that strong hand still resting on his waist and he wished they could stay like that forever.

But Brian opened the door with one movement and Justin had to wake himself up.

“Which floor?” The man asked.

“Second.” Said Justin as he was staring at the stairs ahead of him somewhat diffidently. He wasn’t sure he could make it.

“Come on.” He heard Brian’s voice and before he knew it the man led him up the stairs.

When they reached the front door of the apartment Justin stopped abruptly and stared shyly at Brian.

“That’s my place.”

“Great.” The man answered and waited for Justin’s reaction.

Justin didn’t know what to do. He was still pretty drunk, but he was aware of what was going on. He knew that Ethan could be home at any minute, or maybe he was already in the apartment. He couldn’t explain to himself why it was so hard to say goodbye to Brian.

The boy could feel his heart beating faster as he saw Brian moving closer to him. He was looking deep into those eyes and somehow this whole situation reminded him of his dream from the night before. Everything was so surreal and unbelievable; he could feel the man’s hands pulling him closer. He tried to resist him, but couldn’t really do it. He let Brian’s soft lips brush his own then let him capture his mouth gently.

The kiss was even better than in his dream; probably because this one was real. Justin moaned as he could feel Brian’s tongue exploring his mouth and tried to pull the man even closer to deepen the kiss. The blond totally lost control, he didn’t care if anyone saw them. He’d never been kissed like that before; and he’d never felt so alive before. His whole body was shivering and he wanted to have more and more of Brian’s sweet taste. They were kissing like that for a couple of minutes, never breaking the contact. When Brian finally pulled away he whispered into the blonde’s ear,

“Good night, sweet prince!” 

He placed one more soft kiss on Justin’s ear, but when the boy opened his eyes he found himself standing alone in the stairway.

   
Chapter End Notes:
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