Midnight Whispers
QAF Brian and Justin Fanfiction

Justin's POV:

I can not believe that man! God he is so infuriating. I have never met a man that I wanted to hurt so badly and yet fuck all at the same time. Well my head is pretty fucked up if you ask me. I make it to the top floor and take my costume out of its bag and start to get ready for the night.

"I have been waiting for you." I keep hearing him say it over and over in my head. Damn it!

"No I wasn’t waiting for a trick." I shake my head trying to forget his words. Why is he fucking with me? Why wont he just leave me the fuck alone? I am so frustrated right now I can’t even believe it.

No matter what I do he just keeps on coming. I remember the last time I was in this kind of situation and let’s just say that it turned out as horribly as I know it will with Brian if I let him in. See I had just started working at Barry’s club. I think I was only there for about six months when a man started coming in every night I was there. He was a very attractive man, he was 26, about 5'8, gorgeous black hair that came down around his face to just below his ears, he was Italian, with the darker complection, and deep brown eyes. He had a slight accent, since he had come over here about ten years before hand. So anyways he pursued me like crazy, with flowers and candy and little cards and notes. I kept on turning him down though a little apprehensive about getting involved with a customer, but he wouldn’t give up he would wait for me to get off every night I worked there, and we would talk, about stupid stuff and then as time went on I told him some things about myself such as my father and that situation and then I told him about Jonathan. He then told me a little about his childhood and his work and his parents and how they hadn’t talked to each other since the day he came out as well. Which I wonder about how truthful he was being in any of the conversations we had. He probably just lied through it all. But I am getting off track here. I finally accepted his offer for dinner after him chasing me for three months. I really started to like the guy he was always so sweet to me and gentle. I always felt comfortable talking with him and he always seemed so honest. Like he really cared about what was going on with me. I was so nervous that night. It was a Friday night and I even cancelled work so I could go out with him. I spent three hours trying to pick out the perfect outfit. It was my first date after all. I finally decided on a light blue v neck sweater, with dark grey slacks. I must say I looked good. When he came to my door his mouth dropped open and he said.

"God you look magnificent." he was dressed in a tight black sweater, with dark brown slacks, he looked good too.

"Thank you, your not half bad yourself." he handed me some beautiful yellow roses and I invited him in so I could put them in some water.

"Did you do all these yourself?" he asked. As I came back into the living room carrying the roses in a clear vase,

"Yea, well everything except this one." I say pointing to the one that is a recreation of Vangoughs, a starry night. "it’s my favorite." I tell him.

"Well you have good taste I like it as well." he says looking at me before returning his attention back to my stuff. "Your stuff is amazing. Such passion in them." he says. I know I blushed at the compliment, which I could kick myself in the ass for now. But at the time it really meant a lot that he liked my stuff.

"Thanks." I say. "Are you ready to go?" I ask him, he looks over to me and smiles slightly.

"Sure," he says turning around and heading for the door which he opens and waits for me to walk through before closing it behind us and I lock it up. He holds out his arm for me to take, and I slip my arm thru. "Shall we?" he asks and I just nod my head, and we head out.

We went to one of the hottest new restaurants. Papa Milano’s. they had excellent Italian food, he said that it was almost as good as his mama made. So the evening was absolutely amazing and he asked if I wanted to go back to his place for a drink and I said yes I’d love too. Again could kick myself in the ass for it, but at the time I was naive and didn’t realize what was going on. So we went back to his place and had that drink and another and talked for a while, sitting on his couch. When finally he made his move. I remember wanting him so badly. We had yet to kiss or anything else but simple touches and feeling his lips on mine was amazing.

"I want you." I remember saying as he pulled away to kiss me down my neck. He stopped then and stood up taking my hand and yanking me up from the couch and down the hall to his bedroom. He undressed me and then himself, before laying me on his bed and lying on top of me.

"I have thought about this since the moment I first saw you." he says and I smile and he takes me into another kiss, finally after a long kiss he pulls away and starts to open me up.

"Go slow it’s been awhile." I tell him and he nods with a small smile before continuing. When I am open enough he slowly pushes into me. His eyes squeezed shut, as I watch him. It hurts but not to badly, and when he is all the way inside me he stops and breaths a bit heavily.

"It really has been a while hasn’t it." he says and I just chuckle and nod my head. "God you are so tight, perfect." he says and starts to slowly push into me. It’s not long before I lose myself in his touch and kisses and his cock up my ass. It felt very good, he definitely knew how to fuck a guy. After we came that’s when the lights all started to go off. "Ah that was great." he said.

"Umm hmm." I said.

"So do you need me to call you a cab?" he says while getting up and heading over to the bathroom. I remember thinking at that moment, what an idiot I had been. Damn it. I knew the game, when he said that, and I knew I had been played. So I played along even though I was losing a part of my self as I did so. I was losing that part that said, love was possible, that happily ever after was possible.

"That’s alright, I got it." I say getting out of his bed and gathering my clothes, putting them back on as I went. I wanted out of there as quickly as possible. As I finish getting my shoes on he comes out of the bathroom, he leans down and kisses me on the cheek, and I let him even though I want nothing more than to push him away and scream at him for playing me as a fool. But more than that I want to get out of here with a shred of my dignity.

"That was really great." he says and I just snort.

"Yea." I say and get up to leave as I feel him get into the bed.

"Hey." he says as I reach the door way of his room and I look back at him. He’s all snuggled up in his bed, and I literally wanna fuck his ass up. "Could you lock the door on your way out?" he has the audacity to ask me.

"Whatever." I say as I turn and head straight for the door. I hear a faint thanks. But I completely ignore that and make my way out of this god forsaken place. I lock the door right before I slam it shut. What can I say I had to let a little of the frustration out.

Anyways suffice it to say I never fell for that game again. I wont allow myself to be made a fool of by any man, again. I know Brian is trying to play me and I wont allow it to happen. And you know something, Deb knows this story as well as everything about my father and Jonhathan, so I don’t know why she would want me to put myself in that position again. Before I can get to far into though’s thoughts though I hear the music start and I know it’s time to make my entrance. I just hope Brian’s not out there.

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Brian’s POV:

Well I got a very bad blow job, after I went to the backroom to relieve the pressure that Justin created, then I spent the rest of the night dancing with Mikey and one potential trick or another. But I didn’t act on anymore of my urges, as I waited for Justin to get off of work. Right before he got off I went and said my goodbyes, which I know Mikey wanted to ask me about but I must say I am quite proud of him for keeping it to himself. Anyways I head out to my jeep and pull it around to the back, parking it right next to Justin’s car, and get out and lean against the front and light up a cigarette. About three cigarettes and twenty minutes later, I see the door open and close as he steps out into the night air. Right away though he notices me, and looks at me shaking his head as he huffs up his garment bag and reaches in his pocket pulling out a set of keys. He makes his way over to his car...

"You know Mr. Kinney...it’s illegal to stalk a person." I have to chuckle at that but at the same time I am thinking in my head that I am not far off in that category.

"I’m not stalking you Sunshine. I’m just persistent." I say moving to the side of my Jeep so I can stand in front of him. He leans against his car as do I.

"You know...that’s what they all say. But I can assure you that I know the difference." he says with total seriousness. Before pushing off his car and unlocking the back door, throwing his garment bag into the back seat.

"Have you had a lot of them?" I find myself seriously asking him. He turns around and closes the door. Looking at me he nods his head.

"I’ve had a couple, and I must say I never enjoy them. I mean it’s a real pain in the ass and not in a positive life affirming way. There are lawyers, court visits, paper work, it tends to get messy and I just hate dealing with it all." he says and I can feel myself lose quite a bit of my fuck em all attitude. Would he really put a restraining order on me? "Try me." he says with a smirk. I feel myself smile at that. I didn’t even have to say anything. He is so perfect for me it’s unmistakable.

"There is no need for all that..."

"So your going to leave me alone now, then?" he asks and I roll my tongue into my cheek before I answer.

"Why don’t you want me around Justin?" I ask him putting him on the line for once.

"Well 1: I’m not interested..." I laugh at his response before I say,

"How about we just stick to the truth here."

"You know nothing about me, Mr. Kinney so I suggest you don’t assume you do." he says angrily.

"Well I am trying to get to know you; but your not helping me any here." I say completely serious so he knows I am telling the truth.

"You don’t want to get to know me, you just wanna fuck me. I know your kind and I know your game and let me tell you that there is no way in hell I will fall for it. So why waste any more of your time?" he asks. Crossing his arms over his chest. Well he does have a point there I do wanna fuck him but I think that we could have something a little more than just a one night stand.

"Well I have to say yes I wanna fuck you..." he snorts and flings his hands up in the air. "But I do think we could maybe have more than just one night I mean I think you’d be great so I was thinking we could be more along the lines of fuck buddies. But with no strings attached of course." I tell him and he just looks at me like I have lost my mind, shit maybe I have.

"I can not believe you have the gal to say that to me." he puts his hands over his eyes and takes a deep breath.

 

"What? It seems like the perfect solution. We both get what we want." I tell him, I don’t understand his reluctance. He removes his hands from his eyes and just stares at me again and I feel myself wanting to squirm under his gaze.

"Really cause that’s not what I want." he finally says and I know he’s lying to me right then.

"Oh please! Don’t give me that I know you want me just as much as I want you so why deny ourselves?" I ask incredulously. I can’t believe this guy.

"You Mr. Kinney believe what ever you wish but I am not going to fuck you so lets just not do this anymore." he says gesturing between us.

"No, no I am not going to let you just walk away when I know you want this."

"What the fuck do you mean you’re not going to let me?" he says furiously, and I think to myself ‘you just seriously fucked yourself Kinney.’ "You don’t get a fucking say in anything I do. Do understand me?" fuck he is angry, I can practically see the steam coming out of his ears.

"I didn’t mean it that way." I try and tell him but it may be too late for that. I may have to walk away and try again later.

"I don’t give a fuck how you meant it. Just leave me the fuck alone." he says yanking his door open and getting inside, not even looking in my direction again as he drives off.

"Damn it. You really know how to fuck it all up when it comes to him. Don’t you?" I swear the things that come out of my mouth when I am around him. I am constantly sticking my foot firmly into my mouth when it comes to him. Well I guess I am just going to have to let him cool down for the next couple of days and try and talk to him again at the family dinner. I think to myself as I get into the Jeep and start it up and head home...alone. I’m in no mood for a trick tonight. Plus I better have something good to tell Justin the next time I see him, if I fuck up again he may very well take out that restraining order against me. Why can’t I seem to get it right with him?

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Justin’s POV:

I can not believe that fucker! Thinking that he can tell me what I can and can’t do. Like he has any right to. I thought for sure my little tale of restraining orders would get him to leave me alone but it seemed to just send him into over load. I don’t know what to do any more with him. I mean I have tried everything I can think of. I haven’t given him any real reason to think I want him but yet he seems to know that I do. Even still he should do as I ask and leave me alone. Why can’t he just leave me alone?

I make it home and I take myself to the shower, after I’m done there I get into my favorite old pj’s. They are two sizes to big and they are the most comfortable things I have ever worn. Black satin pajama’s, nothing better in the world to sleep in. They let you just slide all over the bed. It’s great. After that I go into the kitchen and pour myself a very tall glass of beam. I don’t want to do anymore homework tonight plus I am so ahead that I wouldn’t know what to do for homework. I just don’t want to think anymore. I want to sleep, shit I need to sleep. Ever since I met Brian I have barely slept. I mean it was bad enough before between just my classes and homework and work but adding him into the mix has just caused everything to worsen about ten fold. I’m exhausted and I just need a good night sleep. So I drink myself into a stupor, and pass out on my couch. I don’t wake up till about 5 in the evening the next day and that makes me a very happy man. I can feel a bit of a headache as I get up so I go straight to the bathroom and grab some aspirin, before it can get any worse. Then I jump in the shower and start to get ready for the next day of going to the ‘gallery’, and getting my costume set’s for tonight together in their bag. When that is all taken care of I sit down and have some left over chicken and rice, for dinner. Then it’s time to get going.

As I am standing around waiting for time to move faster so I can get out of here, I see a man in his sixties well dressed and quite handsome with his slightly graying hair at the sides and strong facial features, looking over my stuff. I watch him as he takes his time with each piece, and I find myself actually wondering what he thinks of them. When he’s done he looks over to me and smiles a bit. Walking over to me he holds out his hand...

"Mr. Taylor I presume?" he asks. I nod my head and take his hand giving it a firm shake.

"And you are?" I ask as I let go of his hand.

"Oh yes of course I am Benjamin Shaffer. I think you have real talent Mr. Taylor. How long have you been drawing for?" he asks.

"Since I was baby I guess, well that’s always what my mom said anyways." I answer.

"Well I must say it shows. You have a wonderful technique, and the use of color in some of the pieces is quite astounding. But the one with the man standing in the distance with a slight smirk is absolutely wonderful. I could see such passion in that piece." he says looking over to it. Damn it why does he have to pick that one.

"Thank you, that’s very kind of you to say." I tell him. I don’t want to discuss that particular painting or my feelings with it.

"Touchy subject I assume." he says looking down at me, I look up. "Oh I have worked with enough artist to know when they have to much feeling in there paintings that they can’t talk about it." he says and I just look away a little confused and nod my head. "Listen I think you have some real talent and I would like to see some more of your stuff if you wouldn’t mind and maybe we can set something up to where I may be able to get you a couple more shows." he says and I just look at him astonished, as he hands me his card. "Give me a call on Monday and have my assistant set something up for us." he says.

"Thank you." I answer.

"No problem." he throws over his shoulder, as he walks away. I stare down at the card, and realize I might get an agent out of this shit. I feel myself smile, this is turning out to be a good day after all.

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Brian’s POV:

The next couple of days I spend pretty much trying to figure out how to approach Justin at the family dinner tonight and can I just say I am no closer to knowing what to do than I was Friday night. I didn’t go to Forever Young last night I figured I would just end up trying to talk to him again and I knew that he needed time to cool down and I needed time to figure out what to say, so instead I went to Babylon. It was weird being in the old hang out again. It seemed like so long ago since I had been there but in reality it had only been about six weeks. My, my how my life has changed in six weeks. Anyways I spent my time trying to ignore all my thoughts about Justin as I fucked a couple of tricks, took a couple of hits of E, and had a bump or two, it made me forget for a couple of hours and I was grateful for the reprieve. However by the time I got home my thoughts were back to him so I decided to drink until I passed out. It turned out nicely and I got a good nights sleep for the first time since I met him. But it’s almost time for me to head over to Deb’s house and I’m an absolute nervous wreck. I have changed a total of five times in the last hour and the only reason I’m not changing again is because I refuse to do so. I don’t know why I feel so insecure about my wardrobe. It’s ridiculous if you think about. But then again I am finding this whole situation ridiculous. I mean you would think that I have never fucked a guy before I am so nervous. Man I have to calm down.

I walk over to the bar and make myself a glass of Beam and swallow the whole thing. Jesus this has to go right. He just has to give me just a little lee way here. I mean I know that I have stuck my foot in my mouth every time we’ve talked but with him I just can’t help it. I don’t understand why I worry about him and I don’t even understand why I try and get into his business the way I have, but it just happens. I just have this weird protective...I guess you could say instinct. God where did all this shit come from? I just want him around me... and ... I can’t believe I am about to even think this but... I want the little shit to like me. I must be losing my mind to be thinking these kinds of things. Trust me if I could stop feeling these things and thinking this way I would. Hell it’s not like I haven’t tried, fuck I’ve tried everything I can think of to stop, but none of it has helped and I am even beginning to not want them to help. I mean all these fucking impulse’s that I get to talk to him, to see him, to protect him... I have tried to stop them but it’s is literally impossible. The feeling is just to deep inside to stop. So maybe there is something that is saying it is meant to be. Fuck did I really just think that?

Shit it’s time to go. Well I guess I don’t have any more of a choice in this, I have to get everything to go just right. I don’t really know why but the thought of not being able to see him or be around him again is just a little to much to deal with... so Kinney you better not fuck this up.

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Justin’s POV:

 

Well I have finally finished up at the Gallery for the weekend and even though my stuff sold and I got a pretty good chance of getting an agent out of this, I am still so happy I don’t have to do it again for another couple of months. What can I say I hate snobby people and there is just not enough time in my day to keep up appearances sometime. I’m to worn out from the last five years to keep up this pace for to long. Jesus I am only 21 years old and I am already complaining about being worn out. How completely pathetic is that? Well I guess it really doesn’t matter. School is almost over with, just what eight more months and then it’s graduation time for me. I’ll be able to get a real job. Oh I can’t wait, to start making a name for myself. See I ,ay be graduating but I know my hard work isn’t over. I plan on working my ass off to climb the ladder, in the advertising industry. I know it’s not going to be easy and I know I am going to be working my ass off but I don’t mind in the least little bit. I am going to do whatever it takes.

When I get out to my car I see that it is 4:27, so I jump into my car and head over to the wine shop on the way to where Deb lives. I pick out a nice red wine and nice dark blue velvet bag for it as well. Then I jump back in my car and head straight for Deb’s house. Ten minutes later I pull up to a cozy looking house in a nice looking area. I walk up to the door with the wine in hand and knock a couple times. In no time there is a guy about my height with black hair and brown eyes answering the door. He looks a little surprised to see me and I wonder if I got the right address,

"Can I help you?" he asks.

"Um yea is this Debbie Navotny’s house?" I ask.

"Yes it is, is she expecting you?" he asks. Then I hear...

"Of course I am expecting him." Deb says, and I smile at her. While the guy who answered the door just looks at her strangely. "Don’t worry about him sunshine. This is just my son Michael."

"Oh your Michael." I say holding out my hand, "I have heard a lot about you." I say with a smile. Debbie is very proud of her boy. She is always saying Michael has done this or that. He always sounded like a great guy. He shakes my hand. But it feels a little awkward.

"Yea, your names Justin. Right?" he asks letting go of my hand. I nod my head. Then Deb grabs me by the arm....

"Well get your bubble butt in here already. Dinner is almost ready and I want you to meet everyone else." she says dragging me into the living room. There are a few people here and I have seen them around at the diner a few times...then I see them...Emmett and Vic. My boss’ oh shit I say to myself. Fuck I can not believe that they are here. Why me?

"Well here take this I got it for dinner. I hope it will go with what your cooking." I say handing over the bottle of wine.

"Oh Sunshine you didn’t have to do that." she says taking the bottle from me. "But thank you for the thought. It should go perfectly with dinner." I smile and she kisses my cheek. "Ok so everyone this is Justin." she says and there is a collective "hello." "That’s Ted, over there." she says pointing to a starchy looking man, with a smile, which I return with a wave as well. "Then Hunter."

"Hey" Hunter says with a smile, as he straightens himself up in his chair.

"Hi." I say and look back over to Deb.

"And that’s Emmett." I try and give him signals not to mention the fact that I’m a dancer in his club. Fuck I don’t want her to know I dance,

"Hey Em." I say with a smile and a wave.

"Hey sweety."

"You two know each other?" she asks looking to me then Em. But I answer first.

"Yea we have met a few times at his club." I look back to Em and he seems to have gotten the hint I just hope Vic got it too.

"Oh that’s nice. Do you know Vic, my brother?" she asks pointing to Vic in the recliner.

"Yea we’ve met. How’s it going Vic?" I ask with a smile. I haven’t seen him since the night they convinced me to dance at their club.

"Good. How are you?" he asks with a smile, and I know he got it as well.

"I’m very good thank’s." I say and then she continues.

"Well then, this is Ben..." oh he’s hot I have seen him around the bars before. I wouldn’t mind fucking him. "My son’s boyfriend..." oh well I guess I don’t get to fuck him... it’s a shame really. But I still give him a smile and a wave. "Then there is Melanie Lindsey, and there son Gus." she says pointing to a blonde woman and a brunette. They have a beautiful baby, auburn hair, and hazel eye’s that remind me of another with the same. But I shoo though’s thoughts away as fast as they came. I don’t want to think about him right now I just want to try and make it thru this dinner with out Debbie finding out about my dancing. I can’t believe this is happening.

"It’s nice to meet all of you." and then I wonder how many of them know about my dancing. I could care less what they think of me but I don’t want them to accidently tell Deb. Shit this sucks. Just then I hear the door open and I turn to see who else has joined this dinner party from hell...and oh of course how could I possibly not guessed this one...non other than Brian Kinney. God I feel a headache coming on...fast.

"Alright I’m here we can eat." he says coming in and stopping to give Michael a kiss on the cheek, before he looks at me, with a really sexy smile. Damn he looks good, and I want to look away but I can’t. However I do manage to keep a look of indifference.

 

"Hey Sunshine." he says to me and I just give him a curt smile and turn away. I look over to Deb and she gives me a small smile and I know right then that she set this up. Fuck she set me up! I can feel the anger welling up inside of me. Fuck I hate it when people fuck with my life.

"Come on dinner’s ready." Deb, says moving away from my side and into the kitchen. I see everyone moving into the kitchen and I just can’t make myself move. How did I manage to get myself into such a mess? I rub my forehead for a second; trying to get the pressure in my temples to stop pounding.

"Daddy!" I hear all the sudden and I look to the little boy and it just can’t be...

"Hey sonneyboy." and this day just got a hell of a lot worse. He’s a daddy. Brian Kinney is a daddy. I just don’t know what to do with that kind of information. "Come on sunshine, let’s eat." Brian practically whispers in my ear and he is standing so close I can smell his cologne and he smells so damn good. Damn it! Damn it all to hell!

"You can sit next to me Justin." I hear Hunter say, as he comes to stand next to me. But before I can answer I feel Brian put his arm around my waist, and steer me towards the kitchen.

"I don’t think so." Brian says, and I look over to say something to reply to his insinuations, but when I see him holding his son I just lose all ability to speak. The little boy is a spitting image of his father, and Brian just looks so at ease holding his son. I feel my heart quicken at the sight. Then I hear Hunter say...

"Fine." and I watch as he stomps his way to the kitchen. When I feel Brian squeeze me a little tighter around the waist I look up to him, and I feel myself get a little lost in his eyes, and when he smiles this absolutely genuine sweet smile I can’t help but return it. He rubs his hand over my hip and starts to walk us towards the table and when I look at everyone sitting at the table, I feel myself blush. Oh for fuck sake I wanna kick myself in the ass right now. How is this happening?

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Brian’S POV:

God he feels so good against my side. It’s like a perfect fit, and he smells absolutely wonderful. I walk us to the table and I sit Justin down in a chair, then move to sit Gus in his high chair. The table is pretty quiet right now. They are all looking at either Justin or me. They all look like they are in shock. Well everyone but Deb. She just has this huge smile on her face watching everything. I think she may be on my side with this Justin thing. But I also think...fuck I know, that if I hurt him, she is going to fuck my ass up. I noticed how protective she is with him. She treats him like he is one of her own. Which I think is great. Everyone should have a Debbie Navotney in there life.

When I have Gus all settled in his high chair I go and take my seat next to Justin. It feels good having him by my side. He seems to have cooled down a bit from our last conversation. Which is great. When he first looked at me when I came thru the door I thought for sure this was going to turn out just as horrible as the last conversation but then when he looked at me when I had Gus in my arms... his look changed. Softened quite a bit actually. Maybe I might get that little lee way I was hoping for. Lets keep our fingers crossed though and hope I don’t stick my foot in mouth once again.

As we start to pass around the dishes the conversation starts to pick up and it is turned to Justin immediately of course and I feel kinda sorry for him cause having him be a new comer, and me acting the way I am around him, he is going to get bombarded with questions.

"So Justin what do you do?" and I see half of the table falter in their dish passing at Lindsey’ question.

"Well right now I am going to school." he says passing the bread.

"Oh Sunshine don’t be so modest." Deb says. "He is going to Carnegie Mellon for a degree in advertising and he is also going to PIFA for an art degree." she gushes. And I must say I am surprised I had absolutely no idea. Atleast now the dancing makes a little mor sense. Damn he must make a hell of a lot of money dancing, to support going to two colleges. I wonder if that’s even possible. I have to remind myself to not bring up his means of making money. I so do not want another episode like we had on our first and only dance.

"Oh hey I went to a show at PIFA Friday night." Hunter says.

"Really? Why were you at an art show?" Lindsey asks.

"We got extra credit if we went. But anyways, there was a painting of you Brian." he says with a smile. I know I look surprised.

"Really?" I question. Who would paint a picture of me.

"Yea. You were standing in the distance with a smirk on your face and it was just really hot." he licks his lips at the end.

"I wonder who would’ve painted a picture of me?"

"I don’t know, but they knew what they were doing and they did a perfect job." he says taking the dish that Ben is handing him.

"Were you in that show Justin?" Debbie asks.

"No, I didn’t have anything in that show." he says passing me another bowl,

"So when do you graduate Justin?" Emmett asks.

"This is my last year." he says simply, as he starts to eat his lasagne.

"Wow. I had no idea." I find myself saying.

"Well you never asked." Justin retorts, not looking at me.

"It’s not like you ever give me a chance to ask." I say in defense of myself.

"Right. Like that’s the problem." he says and I want to say something, to defend myself but when I think about it he is sorta right, and I don’t want to fight with him I want this to be a good dinner and for us to get along; and I find myself wanting to find out more about this blonde, that obviously is so much more than I thought.

"Alright, maybe your right." I say and look over to him as he looks up at me with a brow raised, in what looks to be surprise. "So your getting a degree in advertising?" I ask and take a bite of my salad.

"Yea."

"Brian is a partner for Vanguard."Deb offers.

"Really." Justin says looking over to me. "That’s the best company in Pittsburgh."

"Of course it is, they have me." I try and boost myself a little bit more.

"Brian is the best in the business." Mikey says and I give him a smile.

"Is that so." Justin says. But then I just shrug my shoulders.

"I work hard." I tell him simply.

"I’m sure." he says and I look over to see if he is being sarcastic but the look on his face is sincere.

"Oh hey Bri, have you figured out who has been leaving ideas..." ‘Cough! Cough!’ all the sudden Justin starts to choke on his food and I slap him on his back a couple of times.

"I’m sorry." he says, with a sour look on his face, and I just rub his back as he takes a long drink from his wine.

"Are you ok?" I ask him rubbing soothing circles on his back. I feel him shiver a little and take a deep breath and another drink from his wine.

 

"Yea I’m fine thanks." he says and drinks the rest of his wine, then grabs for the bottle to pour another glass.

"Are you sure Sunshine?" Deb asks looking very concerned.

"Yea I’m fine just, went down the wrong pipe that’s all. Really." he says assuring us all.

"No we haven’t figured it out, no one is coming forward." I finally answer Mikey’s ill timed question. Why did he have to bring that up in front of Justin?

"That is still the weirdest thing I have ever heard." Ben says.

"Yea your telling me." I say and hope that, that will be the end of this conversation. I don’t particularly want to discuss this in front of Justin. What I really want is to find out more about him.

"So how old is Gus?" Justin asks... and then the conversation steers towards my son and then onto the daily grinds we always talk about. It seemed every time someone tried to question Justin about anything he seemed to always have a one sentence answer and then he would steer back away from himself. It was pretty remarkable to watch but incredibly aggravating at the same time. I wanted to have this opportunity to find out more about him and the only thing I have really found out is that he is going to school to become an ad exec., and he is also in one of the top art schools in the country. Which is a couple of huge things to find out I must admit, not to mention that I am incredibly impressed. I mean I remember how hard college was and the incredible work load I had to just get my degree as an ad exec. And he is doing that as well as going to school to get a degree in the arts. I can’t imagine what his schedule must be like. But still I’m not finding out anything deeper than that. Shit I’m not even sure what I’m looking for until I hear the question.

"So Justin do you have anyone special in your life." my ears perk up at that, and I look over to him waiting to hear his answer.

"No." he says with a laugh, and I find myself wanting to know why he finds that question so funny.

"Okay." Melanie reply’s.

"Humh?" I find coming out of my mouth.

"What?" Justin asks, looking at me with questioning eyes, and I’m not sure if I want to ask him in front of everyone else. Actually I know I don’t want to ask him in front of everyone.

"Nothing." I say and try and get away from the conversation as quickly as possible with a question never heard coming from my mouth. "So what’s for dessert?" I ask looking to Deb for some support here. But all I get is some very confused stares coming my way. Fuck why can’t they ever just go along with my ideas?

"No what was humh...for?" he questions again.

"We have a wonderful Black Forrest cake that Vic made." Deb says finally stepping in to help a guy out. Thank you.

"Well?" Justin asks again and fuck can’t he just forget I even grunted anything at all?

"That sounds good, I’d love a piece." I say still trying to get away from the relationship question. Why did that have to come out of my mouth? I’m just not equipped to have this conversation.

"Brian?" I guess he can’t forget.

"Really?" Vic asks. Jesus I wish everyone would get on the train here.

"You know what...forget it. Deb could I use your restroom?" he says. I send a silent thank you to whoever gave me the reprieve.

"Sure Sunshine...it’s upstairs first door on your right."

"Thank you." he says with a smile and gets up and moves to the stairs. I watch him go until I can’t see him anymore.

"What the fuck is going on?" Mikey asks.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" I ask angrily. Hoping to scare them off of the subject which obviously doesn’t work cause Theodore keeps the line open.

"Let’s see you just asked about dessert, and said you wanted a piece...then there was you putting your arm around his waist leading him to the table and sitting him down then sitting down right next to him..."

"Oh let’s not forget the way he reacted when I suggested Justin sit next to me..." Hunter brings up.

"And all the questions he’s been asking Justin...." that’s from Melanie.

"Not to mention you have been pretty... dare I say sweet to him...."

"Alright already fuck." I say throwing my hands up in defeat. I should’ve known they were going to turn on me like this.

"Well?" Mikey asks.

"Well what? It’s none of anybodies fucking business, what’s going on between me and Justin. So ..." I hear Justin coming down the stairs."just stay the fuck out of it." I say quietly right before he makes the turn to head into the kitchen.

"Sunshine you want a piece of cake?" Debbie asks with a smile trying to bring the conversation back to dinner. God I hope so.

"Um yea, but just a small piece. Thanks." he says as he sits down next to me. The rest of the time is spent just keeping to small topics that I can’t get into to trouble with; which I am thankful for. Before I know it though it’s almost 7:30 and Justin is saying....

"Well I have to get going, but it was great meeting all of you." he says standing up and I find myself wanting to find anything to get him to stay a little longer.

"Oh Justin are you sure?" Deb asks getting up as well.

"Yea I have to get to work." he says going over to give her a hug.

"Ok well thank you for coming. We should do this more often." she says after giving him a kiss on the cheek.

"Um sure." he says hesitantly, but leaves it at that.

"It was nice to meet you Justin." the ladies say.

"You too." he says.

"Jussin!" Gus yells out holding up his hands, and squeezing his fist. "Hug." he request and I am totally surprised. But looking at Justin and seeing that Sunshine smile, I really can’t fault my kid for falling for the blonde just as I have.

"May I?" he asks the ladies.

"Sure." Melanie says.

"Absolutely." Lindsey replies. I watch him walk over and give my son a hug and as I watch them I can’t help this warm feeling that comes over me and I am completely confused by it. When he pulls back I make a split second decision.

"Well I should get going too." I say standing up and moving over to give my son a hug and a kiss.

"Really?" Emmett says and I wonder if they are ever going to give me a break on this subject. Probably not.

"Yea." I simply reply. I don’t need to explain myself to anyone. I never have.

"Ok well you two drive careful." Deb says with a smile and I walk over to give her a kiss....

"Thanks." I whisper into her ear.

"Your welcome...don’t fuck it up." she whispers back before letting me go. I just smile at her letting her know I got it, as she slaps me nicely on the cheek.

"Thank you again Deb dinner was great and so was the cake Vic." Justin says going to stand at the kitchen entrance, I take my leave right there though and wait for him outside.

FYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYF

Justin’s POV:

As I am walking to the front door I am getting more and more nervous. I know he is waiting for me outside. Man I can’t believe, how many times I almost got caught on so many things tonight. First there’s Deb almost finding out about my dancing. Then there was Hunter seeing the painting of Brian at PIFA. Now that I was definitely not expecting. But now that I think about it he looks an awful lot like the guy I saw looking at my painting Friday night. Man at least he didn’t notice the signature at the bottom and thank god the show is over and all the paintings have been shipped out to there buyers. I doubt he would’ve gone looking for it but if Hunter would’ve mentioned the signature there is no doubt in my mind that he would’ve gone looking for it and I would’ve been fucked and not in a good way. Oh and when Michael brought up the whole who ‘left the ideas’ thing I thought I was going to choke to death. He and his mother must have a major flaw with timing. Right then I just wanted to get drunk and forget this night ever happened. That still sounds like a fabulous idea but first I have to get thru Brian who is waiting right outside this door, and work.

When I open the door and step thru I see him standing right in front of me facing towards the street smoking a cigarette. I could definitely go for one of those too. So I pull out my pack and light myself one and start to make my way past him.

"So I take it Deb doesn’t know you dance for a living." he says and I stop dead in my tracks. Why is he bringing this up?

"No she doesn’t and I’d like to keep it that way." I tell him,

"What does she think you do then?"

"I’ve been working as a janitor for almost six years. As far as she knows that’s all I do." I say, letting a small piece of myself out to him.

 

"You’re a janitor?" he says, with a smirk, and I wonder what he’s playing at here..

"Yea." I say and turn to walk away...

"Hold up Sunshine." he says coming up behind me.

"What?.. What do you want?" I say exasperated. I’ve just had enough for tonight.

"Hey calm down. I just want to talk to you a little more." he says and I look in his eyes and he looks sincere enough but I know better than to fall for that.

"Look I’ve had enough of share time for one evening..."

"You hardly shared anything, you kept on turning the conversation over every time it came close to you." Jesus what does he want from me.

"Well what can I say? I’m not exactly the sharing type of person." I say with a smirk.

"I could see that. Not that I blame you really. I’m not exactly the sharing type either."

"No kidding" I say sarcastically. I don’t really care either way right about now. All I want is for him to leave me alone. "So are we done talking now? Cause I really have to be getting to work." I turn to walk away yet again, and yet again he follows right on heels.

"Well maybe we could have that dance after you’re done working." he says, and I don’t even falter in my steps when I reply.

"I don’t think so."

"Oh come on already...it’s just one dance!" he says sounding a bit annoyed, as I make it to my door and unlock it. When I try to open it though he holds it closed. "Come on just one dance. I promise not to ask any stupid questions." he says and I can’t help the way his voice makes me feel inside when he asks. And when I look up to him and I see his puppy dog eyes that I am sure he has perfected over the years cause they are absolutely perfect and make me turn to jello inside. Damn it.

"Fine." I say and yank my door open and get in, oh I need a swift kick in the ass for that reply. I can’t believe that I just said I would dance with him. What was I thinking? "You know I don’t..." I try and back peddle...

"No, no, no you said one dance. I’ll wait for you by the bar." he says giving me a quick kiss on the mouth and closing the door just as quickly. God his lips are so soft, I have dreamt about those lips touching mine and god if it’s possible it felt a hundred times better.

I can’t dance with him there is no way I can hold out if I do. I am so fucked. This is like a mantra in my head all the way to the club and threw two of my dances until I try and convince myself that one dance wont hurt anything. That I can make it threw just one dance. But by the time my last dance is over and I am putting all of my costume’s back into there bag I stop trying to fool myself and realize that I am just going to have to go straight to my car, fuck what I said. This is self preservation here, and I won’t last a dance with him pushed up against me just the memory of the last time is to much when it is mixed with the feel of his lips on mine. Shit I can still feel it. It’s like it was branded onto me. So I quickly grab my stuff and head down the employee staircase and out the back door. I pretty much run to my car, and jump in throwing my thing over my shoulder, while I start up my car and peel out of the parking lot. I don’t know I just had this feeling that he was going to know some how that I would chicken out, and be waiting for me. I know it’s ridiculous but he seems to have this sixth sense when it comes to what I want. Well at least the part about me wanting him anyways. I am so fucked.

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