Midnight Whispers
QAF Brian and Justin Fanfiction
Gus approached Justin, pad and crayons held tightly. “Do you have time for me now, Justin?”

Justin smiled at the boy. “I have all the time you want, Gus.”

Judson grinned to himself. One point for Justin, zero points for Michael. Gus was bound to mention it to Brian.

“Take another glass,” Judson said, filling it quickly. “Talking to Gus is thirsty work!”

Justin laughed. “Thanks. Do you want a drink, Gus?”

Gus nodded. “Are we out of orange juice yet?”

Judson shook his head and poured juice over ice. “Your dad makes sure we never run out. He knows you love it.”

“You go ahead and sit down,” Justin said, pushing his messenger bag onto his back.

Did he ever put that damn thing down? What could be so important that he didn't just leave it in his room, Judson wondered.

“I’ll bring the glasses.”

Gus smiled at him. “Thanks, Justin.”



Justin was rather relieved that the boy had taken him away from the bar. He didn’t quite know how to handle Judson’s sincere kindness, and Shane’s ill-hidden hostility made him feel really uncomfortable.

“Look, Justin. It’s supposed to be a horse. Only, it doesn't look like a horse.”

Justin nodded. “Animals are difficult. Sometimes it's easier to work from a really good photo until you get the hang of it. Can I have a look at your other drawings?”

“Sure you can. But you mustn’t lie. I know which ones are bad. So don’t try and tell me they’re good!”

“Of course not,” Justin shook his head. “Why would I do that?”

“Debbie does, and Michael, too,” Gus said disdainfully.

Justin lowered his voice, “Maybe they don't know any better?”

Gus shrugged. “Daddy says some people lie to you when you’re a kid, and then they just continue to do that when you're a grown-up.”

“Unfortunately, that’s often true,” Justin sighed. “But they won't be able to lie to you, because you’re already onto them.”

Gus grinned. “Daddy taught me how to tell.”

“He taught me, too.” Justin remembered Brian instructing him to watch people’s eyes, observe their body-language, and listen to the tone of their voice, take note of a pause not caused by the necessity to breathe.

He still wondered what had made him think he could lie to Brian. Brian had probably known the truth before he had even finished his sentence.

They shared a smile, and then Justin studied the boy’s efforts. He was doing well. Not the simple stuff Molly had done at that age, and not what he had been able to do. What Gus lacked in co-ordination, he made up for in imagination and talent.

Finally, Justin looked up. “You’re good,” he said honestly. “I think you feel these are the ones that don’t work right,” he pointed to three or four drawings.

“Yes,” Gus said. “Dad says I need to work on perspective, but I didn't understand his description, and we got interrupted before he could explain again.”

“Okay. One of the problems is that you haven’t got very good control over your muscles yet, Gus. That is something that improves naturally as you get older, and you can’t do much about it at the moment. As for perspective, I can show you a few tricks.”

Justin explained patiently, making sure Gus grasped the concept.

“You should’ve been a teacher,” Lindsay smiled, settling in a chair opposite them, cradling a glass.

Justin caught the whiff of alcohol, and wondered. It was a bit early to start drinking; they hadn’t even had lunch yet.

“Gus has a good eye; it's fun teaching him,” he explained.

“Daddy said that, what does it mean,” Gus wanted to know.

“It means that you can transfer what you see onto paper. Not many people can do that. They look at something, but they have no clue how to get it from their eyes to their fingers to paper. The trick is to put in all the important bits, and leave out what doesn’t belong. You have to be able to see that, and a lot of people can’t.”

Gus nodded. “Daddy says you do great portraits. Can I watch how you do that?”

“Sure,” Justin said readily.

He was used to his teachers looking over his shoulders, and Brian. The kid wouldn’t be a problem. And Brian thought his portraits were great! It was a nice thing to find out.

“Ask your mom to sit for us.”

“Right,” Lindsay laughed. “As long as you flatter me!”

She sounded tipsy, Justin realized. He smiled reassurance. “I don’t need to flatter you, pretty lady!”

Amused, Justin noticed that the boy’s sketch-pad was as good as the ones he used. Brian had never been stingy, and obviously, only the best would do for his son.

With a clean sheet of paper in front of him, Justin started to work, explaining to Gus about proportion and perspective as he went along. Having drawn Lindsay before, it was an uncomplicated task. Portraits had always been the easiest for him.

He saw the differences, though – Lindsay was ageing. It wasn’t just the crow’s feet lining the corners of her eyes, it was the slightly sagging chin, the unhealthy pallor of her skin and the limp hair. He hadn’t seen her in a year, and she looked as though she had aged ten.

Doing portraits did that for him. He looked at people more closely, more attentively. Sometimes, thinking about the people he portrayed, he discovered things about them he hadn't known before. Maybe he needed to do more sketches of Brian?

Strange, Lindsay was the same age as Brian, and Brian still looked almost as young as the day they had met. Did having a kid put so much strain on a woman’s body? Or did Brian just have more life in him than most people?

Either way, Justin ended up flattering Lindsay – he didn’t want her to take this home and compare it to the drawings she already had.

“Here you go,” Justin finally said. “All done!”

“Oh good,” Lindsay said, getting to her feet. “My glass is empty.”

“Mom looks nice,” Gus said, apparently well pleased. “Thank you so much, Justin!”

“Anytime,” Justin grinned. “Doing stuff with you is fun!”



Debbie had obviously decided that things had been peaceful for long enough. “So, Lindsay, who is this Sam,” she inquired.

“You heard Bri,” Lindsay said, pouring herself another large drink. “None of your business.”

“We have a right to know what goes on with JR,” Debbie insisted.

Oh, the royal we now, was it? Judson suppressed a sigh. Such busy-bodies. So blind to the needs and wishes of others.

“Maybe. But you have no rights where I’m concerned,” Lindsay sounded exasperated.

Debbie glared at her. “I’ve taken you in, and I’ve always treated you and Mel like my own daughters. You're bringing up my grand-daughter. And now you tell me I’ve no rights?”

“Beneficium accipere est libertatem vendere, isn’t that right Debbie?”

Brian sounded cool, too cool. And Melanie looked like she had cried. But they were walking close together, and Judson took that as a sign that the negotiations had been fairly successful.

Debbie stared at Brian angrily, hands on hips. “You know damn well I don’t speak French.”

“Or Latin, for that matter,” Judson heard Molly mutter. He grinned at her, and got a wink in return.

“Forgot,” Brian said smoothly. “It means that if you accept benefits you give up freedom.”

If Brian believed that, it would explain why he hated having to accept any sort of support. Judson wondered again how Brian managed to grow up to be the man he was.

“Being part of my family isn’t a benefit, Brian. You should know that,” Debbie said.

Shane smirked, and Judson felt a similar expression creep into his own features. Jennifer and Tucker were grinning at each other a bit too widely, and Justin had turned away, his shoulders shaking.

To his credit, Brian managed to keep a straight face. “In return for mothering everybody, you expect to be given a mother’s rights. It doesn’t work that way with adults, Debbie.”

“Michael tells me everything,” Debbie insisted.

“Yeah,” Ted said, “because he’s too scared not to.”

“I like talking to my mom,” Michael said. “She makes sense.”

“Unless she’s sending you off with Doctor David, huh,” Ted grinned.

“That was Brian who did that,” Michael protested.

Judson saw the look Brian and Justin exchanged. They obviously remembered differently.

“You made my boy go to Portland,” Debbie demanded, outraged. “How could you?”

“I seem to recall,” Brian said slowly, his eyes narrowing dangerously, “that you turned up at the loft, saying that I fucked it up for your son; that I owed your kid something; demanding that I help Mikey grow up, help him be a man, stop him having fun and make him grab his chance with the good doctor. I did what you asked me to do, Debbie.”

There was a ghost of Debbie’s phrasing in Brian’s voice, her syntax, the melody of her speech. Apparently his recollection was correct, if Debbie’s shocked face was anything to go by.

“Mom! You had no right…” Michael moaned, but he was ignored.

“Then why did he come back,” Debbie asked, her voice rising.

Brian shrugged. “Don’t blame me. I stayed away from him. Apparently, Mikey managed to fuck up all by his little self.”

“You should have gone to Oregon, and helped him sort it out.”

“Now, Debbie, why would I do that? I didn't give a fuck about Mikey, or David. I’m a heartless shit, remember,” Brian said, his face impassive.

Too expressionless, Judson thought. Just as he had feared – that look in Brian's eyes was back, darkening the hazel to chocolate almost.

“It’s not like you didn't have the time,” Michael said. “You could’ve visited.”

“I’m a very busy man, Michael,” Brian replied.

Emmett shook his head. “Drop it, Michael. And you, Debbie. David was a control freak, and he was treating Michael like he must’ve treated his ex-wife. Brian was the only one who saw through him, and he warned you, Michael. You just didn't want to hear it, sweetheart.”

“David was adorable,” Debbie insisted.

Ben and Brian exchanged a quick glance, Ben appeared resigned.

“Yeah, adorable. And it was totally adorable how we suddenly weren’t good enough for Michael anymore,” Emmett said. “Brian even had to pay to get us into the party for that Senator. And then Michael was ashamed of us, you most of all, Debbie.”

“It wasn't that bad,” Debbie said weakly. “If we hadn’t dressed up like a bunch of faggots…”

Justin got up and stood next to Brian, putting an arm around his waist. As if on auto-pilot, Brian draped an arm around his shoulders.

Judson wondered how often they had presented this united front to the world, without ever realizing what they were doing. He returned Shane’s reckoning stare levelly. There was no way he was going to give Brian more grief. If he needed to be with Justin this badly, he would not stand in his way.

“David was an asshole, and you were pushing Michael at him because you wanted your son to go out with somebody classy. Only, David had airs and graces, but no class. He made Michael feel inferior and inept. It was almost as if he wanted Michael to be his My Fair Lady, and you were just so proud that somebody had picked your kid for the part. Brian was doing Michael a favor when he told him to stay away from David!”

Justin glared at Debbie, daring her to contradict him.

“Look who’s talking,” Debbie sneered. “The world’s two biggest experts on relationships, who haven't been able to sort theirs out in five years!”

Judson imagined that he saw both of them flinch, and Brian drew Justin closer to him.

“I simply haven't had the time,” Brian said icily. “I had to take care of your son first.”

“Fuck you! You don’t give a shit about my kid!” Debbie yelled.

“I don’t give a shit about anybody,” Brian said, still in that cold tone. “I thought we had established that.”

“You give a shit, Daddy,” Gus said tremulously, clinging to Brian's trousers with both hands. “They just don’t give a shit about you.”

“Fuck. Where do you come from? I thought you guys were in the playground.” Brian let go of Justin and picked up Gus. “Shh, no reason to be upset; it's okay. We’re just having a lively debate.”

“You’re shitting me,” Gus complained. “You were fighting.”

Brian sucked his lips into his mouth. “You're right. We were having a debate, and it has turned into a bit of an argument. We’ll stop, okay?”

“No,” Debbie said furiously. “We’re having this out, now.”

“You’re on your own. I’m not upsetting my kid on your account,” Brian replied.

“He can go play,” Michael said.

Brian shot him a look full of hurt surprise and shook his head. “Come on, guys, we’re out of here.”

He turned, grabbed Justin's wrist and pulled him along.

“Brian Kinney! You stand still and listen to what I have to say.”

Brian laughed. “I’m not fourteen anymore, Debbie. You don’t scare me.”

“Did she scare you when you were fourteen,” Judson heard Gus ask as they vanished into the house. He would have liked to hear Brian’s answer.

“Well,” Judson said. “Wasn't that cozy. Lunch, anybody?”
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