Midnight Whispers
QAF Brian and Justin Fanfiction
They stepped back into the elevator, and JR asked, “Ice-cream, Dada?”

“I’d thought we’d get you a haircut first,” Brian said.

“I’m thirsty, Daddy,” Gus said. “Can we get a drink?”

“Sure, we can pop into that diner over there. We’ll go for an ice-cream after, okay, JR?”

JR nodded. “Need to go!”

“All the more reason to go into the diner,” Brian said. “What do you guys want to drink?”

“Lemonade,” JR said.

“Orange-juice,” Gus said. “With ice!”

“I’ll take JR to the bathroom. Order a soda for me, Justin? Hold the ice.”

Justin nodded and settled into a booth with Gus. The waitress arrived a moment later, and he ordered their drinks. She vanished with a distracted smile and a nod.

“Did it take a long time?” Gus asked.

“Did what take a long time,” Justin said, puzzled.

“For daddy to cool down,” Gus said, sighing impatiently.

Probably because I’m so slow on the uptake, Justin thought, careful not to grin. “No, it didn’t take long.”

“Why didn’t he like the drawing? It’s just a drawing?”

Justin shrugged. “I asked, but he said it’s something he can’t explain.”

Gus giggled. “You’re too young, too. How old are you, Justin?”

“I’m twenty-four.”

“He’s too old for you, sonny-boy,” Brian said, helping JR into her chair and slipping into the seat next to Justin.

“But he’s too young for you,” Gus shot back, frowning.

Justin held his breath. If an adult had said that…

Brian shrugged. “He’s always been too young for me,” he said easily. “But he wouldn't listen when I told him.”

Gus copied the gesture. “Jimmy told Dave that’s because you’re so hot.”

Amused, Justin watched as Brian’s lids fluttered. “Listen to me, Gus. Are you listening?”

“I’m listening,” Gus said.

“Me, too,” JR said eagerly.

“Good,” Brian gave her a quick smile. “JR. Gus. Don’t repeat conversations you overheard. It's bound to get you into trouble.”

“That’s because you grown-ups have so many secrets. You’re all scared something will slip out. Besides, Dave said you already know Jimmy wants to go down on you.”

The waitress had arrived at their table right then, and now she turned a delicate shade of pink.

Brian raised an aloof eyebrow at her, as though that was the kind of conversation all parents had with their kids.

He could get away with that sort of thing, Justin reflected. But why? Was it the cool elegance Brian exuded, even in jeans and T-shirt? The confidence? Or the attitude?

Hastily, the waitress put down the drinks and left, looking scandalized.

“For future reference, sonny-boy – you shouldn’t make that kind of comment in a public place until you’re much older.”

“How old,” Gus asked, unfazed.

Brian sighed softly. “Wait twenty years.”

“That doesn't work. I won’t be able to talk to you about important things until then. Only if we’re at home,” Gus frowned. “Straight people will just have to put up with it. Or not listen to me.”

Justin grinned. “He sounds just like you.”

“I guess we’ll have to stay away from the straight folks,” Brian said.

“Their places are boring, anyway,” Gus stated.

Justin looked around. True. The place was boring. An ordinary diner. Nothing to attract the eye, and nothing that might make you want to hang around. Gay places were a lot more fun, especially the Rainbow ones.

“Well, if you finished your drinks, we can leave,” Brian said, downing the rest of his soda.

The kids scrambled from their places, and Brian tossed twenty bucks on the table.

“Way too much,” Justin murmured.

“I’m compensating her for loss of composure,” Brian whispered back.

Justin laughed.

They walked back to the car, JR holding Brian’s hand and skipping along.

“Okay, where to now,” Justin asked when they had all climbed in.

“Hairdresser,” Brian and the kids said in unison.

Justin shook his head. “You practiced that, didn’t you?”

“Did not,” Gus said. “Are you going to get a haircut, too?”

“Don’t you start,” Justin said, exasperated. “What’s with my hair?”

“It’s too long and all untidy,” Gus said matter-of-factly. “Daddy’s hair looks much nicer.”

“You must be gay,” Justin decided. “Other kids your age don't even notice such things.”

He shot Brian a quick look, who wore his sunglasses, hiding his eyes. But his lips were twitching, and Justin grinned in response and shook his head.

“Right. Where is that hairdresser?”

“Turn right at the lights,” Brian directed. “Then the next left.”

A few more right and left turns, and they stopped in front of fancy-looking barber’s shop.

“Everybody out,” Brian said. “You all look like fucking hobos.”

“Much better to look like a fucking homo,” Justin quipped.

Brian groaned. “That was awful.”



“Come back in a month. I’m not taking off another millimeter, Brian. Not even a tenth of a millimeter. Your hair is fine. You look great.”

“Glad to hear it, Stephen,” Brian said wryly. “I’m not here about my hair. It’s their hair I’m worried about.”

“With good reason,” Stephen said, frowning at Justin. “What's this, you have a bad hair day? That style went out of fashion before you were even born, dude.”

Brian smirked. “Do something about it.”

“With pleasure,” Stephen said. “Come along. When I’m through with you, you’ll look almost human.”

“Gee, thanks,” Justin said. “Too kind.”

Brian winked at him. “He always talks like that. But he’s a wizard with a pair of scissors. Trust him.”

“Come on, come on. I haven’t got all day,” Stephen said impatiently. “Forty minutes, Brian.”

Brian nodded. “I’ll get the kids done.”

“You do that. Is that a girl behind that fringe? Dreadful. Janice! Janice! Emergency!”

A not-so-young woman with bright purple hair appeared from behind a curtain. “Calm down, Stephen. I’m at work, not on a prison break.”

She smiled at the kids. “Ladies first, right? Come on, honey, we’ll get you a haircut to go with that pretty dress you're wearing.”

“It’s new,” Justin heard before Stephen grabbed his arm and propelled him along.



Brian had been right, Stephen was a wizard. A very uncommunicative wizard who never asked what Justin wanted done. He washed, conditioned, cut and dried Justin’s hair, and Justin was amazed how good he looked.

“That’s a great cut,” Justin said, well pleased.

“Of course it is,” Stephen said condescendingly. “I did it.”

“Well,” Justin cleared his throat. “Thanks.”

“Come back here, you hear? Don't let some ham-fisted jerk spoil my work.”

“I won’t,” Justin promised. Stephen would probably break his arm if he did, he thought.

Brian was already waiting for him with the kids. JR looked lovely, the bouncy bob was just right for her. Justin grinned, Gus clearly had his hair cut ‘like daddy’, and looked even more like a very miniature version of Brian.

“Better,” Brian said, satisfied.

“What do you mean, better,” Stephen said grumpily. “It’s perfect. Wash and dry and be back here in four weeks. Styled for the dude who can’t be bothered with styling.”

“Good thinking,” Brian said, sounding amused.

Justin didn't think it was funny. Stephen irritated the hell out of him.

“Account?”

“Yes,” Brian said.

“Fine, see you in four weeks. No sooner! Bye.”

Stephen vanished behind the curtain and Brian tilted his head. “Ice-cream, gang?”

“Oh, yes!” JR chirped up. “I’m all pretty now! Look Justin!”

“You’re very pretty,” Justin said. “You look beautiful in your new clothes and with that smart haircut!”

JR beamed at him, “And Gus looks nice, too.”

“Gus looks like his dad,” Justin commented, earning himself a delighted smile from Gus, and a pleased look from Brian.

“You look cool,” Gus said. “Much, much better.”

“You guys about finished with the mutual appreciation society?” Brian combed gentle fingers into the newly short hair at his nape, and Justin automatically arched into the touch. Brian let go as if burned.

“Can we go to ‘Rainbow on Ice’, Daddy,” Gus asked, and told Justin, “They’ve got the best strawberry sundae ever!”

“Well, everybody get into the car,” Brian said. “Back to Penn, Justin.”

Justin just nodded, still wondering what that touch had been all about. Almost as if Brian had acted without thinking, and it definitely wasn't normal. Brian only did that when he was completely at ease. Fuck. Being with Brian had been so uncomplicated. But of course, that was before he had started to think, and to catalogue the reactions. Now it was like standing on thin ice, a careless step could plunge you into sub-zero black depths.

Once in the car, Brian immediately started the CD player, turning up the volume. You had to turn it up for ‘I Will Survive’, everybody did that. But Justin suspected Brian did it because he wanted to avoid talking.



They arrived at the ice-cream parlor just when Justin began to feel the silence was oppressive.

The kids clambered out of the car happily, JR swirling her skirt. “Am I pretty, Dada?”

“You’re very pretty, princess,” Brian confirmed.

“Am I pretty,” Gus asked.

“Boys aren’t pretty,” Brian replied. “You’re handsome.”

“And your dad is dashing,” Justin grinned.

Brian was hiding behind the Ray-Bans again, there seemed to be no reaction. Justin’s gut-feeling said otherwise.

The parlor was a lot like the diner and ‘Rainbow Provisions’, the stamp of the owner’s taste quite obvious.

“You know the guy who owns these,” Justin wanted to know as they sat down.

“Yes,” Brian said.

“Like him?”

Brian took off the sunglasses and gave him a stern look. “Why do you ask?”

Justin shrugged. “You seem to share the same taste.”

Brian looked around as though seeing the parlor for the first time. “You could say that.”

“So, do you like him?”

“As a matter of fact, yes.”

“Did you fuck him?”

“None of your fucking business,” Brian shot back, and Justin knew he should have swallowed that last question.

“I want a big sundae,” JR announced. “Real big.”

“Huge,” Gus supplied, grinning. “Enormous.”

“Knock yourselves out,” Brian said. “You order, Justin?”

Justin wondered why Brian kept vanishing into the bathroom.

“Taking stomach pills,” Gus said, as if he could read his mind. “Don’t tell.”

Justin smiled at the boy. “Thanks, Gus. I was getting worried.”

Gus nodded. “I could see that. You really like my dad.”

“I do.”

“He likes you, too,” Gus said. “He doesn’t get mad with people he doesn’t like.”

Justin ordered four large strawberry sundaes, and the kids tucked in happily.

Brian returned, looked at the big goblet and raised that eyebrow at him. “What do I do with that?”

“Eat it,” Justin and Gus said in unison, and grinned at each other.

“Are you nuts?” Brian sighed. “That’ll get me two hours on the stair-master.”

Justin shook his head. “Won’t. You worked it off in the pool this morning.”

Brian picked up the long spoon, dipping it in with visible reluctance.

Justin smiled and filled his own spoon, then nudged Brian’s knee with his own. Brian looked up, and, holding his eyes, Justin ran the tip of his tongue around the spoon before immersing it in the sweet stuff.

Brian raised an eyebrow, lifted his spoon to his mouth and slowly licked the underside, traced the tip of his tongue around the edge of the spoon very deliberately, then swirled his tongue through the cream, scooping it up.

Justin caught his breath. Trust Brian to up the ante. Well, two could play that game. He brought the spoon to his mouth, and slowly lapped up the contents with just the tip of his tongue, his eyes on Brian.

Brian’s eyes widened, he picked up a strawberry, licked it, then sucked it in and squashed it against the roof of his open mouth, swallowing slowly. The juice stained his lips a moist red.

Justin sighed. Fuck, he remembered those moments. Remembered them all too well, actually, if the tightness in his jeans was anything to go by. Brian would win this one hands down.

Justin lifted the spoon and slowly sucked it into his mouth, hardly tasting the ice-cream, he was so caught up in how Brian's eyes changed. Emotion of any kind always seemed to bring out the green and gold more distinctly.

With a look of pure challenge, Brian brought the spoon up, swirled his tongue around the edge, then sucked it into his mouth, his cheeks hollowing just so.

Justin swallowed, his mouth suddenly dry.

“You’re in over your head, and you know it,” Brian whispered huskily. He picked up another strawberry, did that squashing thing again and then surprised Justin by leaning forward and transferring the sweet sticky mass to his mouth.

Justin closed his eyes and leaned into the touch, forgetting himself.

“Do remember you're in public, Brian,” Cynthia’s amused voice brought Justin back to reality with a nasty jolt. “Long time no see, Justin. Hi kids!”

“Thanks for the reminder, Cynthia,” Brian greeted evenly. “Nice hair-do.”

Justin smiled. “Hi Cynthia. You look amazing.”

Cynthia tossed her long blue hair, grinning. “Brian’s idea. I love it.”

“So, how many guys have hit on you today?”

“I lost count, Brian,” Cynthia smiled. “Enough to give my ego a big boost, that’s for sure. I actually came in here for a bit of a break.”

“Join us,” Brian invited, and Justin wondered whether it was half-hearted. Or maybe Brian was glad to be rescued?

Cynthia shook her head. “Three’s a crowd. I’m just having a quick coffee, and then I’m heading over to Macy’s for some stuff. Nice seeing you again, Justin. Don’t be a stranger!”

Cynthia walked away, the shiny strands swinging in her back, and Gus looked after her with a frown. “Why don’t we count, Daddy?”

Brian smiled. “You count, sonny-boy.”

“You and Justin and JR and me, that’s four. Why does Cynthia say three is a crowd?”

Brian replied, “It’s just something folks say. When two people are in love, they’d prefer to be alone.”

Gus nodded thoughtfully. “Are you in love with Justin?”

Justin held his breath. Brian shot him a quick glance out of the corner of his eye, and Justin suppressed a grin. Caught between a rock and a hard place, he thought.

The silence stretched, and Gus tilted his head the way Brian sometimes did, looking at his father expectantly.

Brian slowly ate two more spoonfuls of his sundae, and finally said, “I don’t know the answer, Gus.”

Gus shook his head. “You know. You don't want to say.”

Strangely, that had been what Justin was thinking.

Brian sighed. “I really don’t know. If I knew, I’d say.”

Gus rolled his eyes, and Justin wondered where he got that from. Melanie certainly did a fair amount of eye-rolling, but Justin had a feeling the kid wouldn't want to copy her.

“Is everything this complicated when you grow up?”

Brian licked his spoon pensively. “Some things get easier, but emotions seem to get more complicated, the older you get.”

“Do people become more complicated?”

“Yes,” Brian said, “Age adds baggage.”

“I don’t understand that, Daddy.”

“What I mean is, as you get older, you experience more things. Some of these experiences are unpleasant, and they influence your thinking. So, the more you have to think, the more complicated it seems to be to deal with other people.”

Gus sighed, very Brian-like. “I’m not going to grow up.”

“There’s nothing you can do about that, I’m afraid,” Brian said. “You can decide you don’t want to grow old, but you’ll be grown up before you know it. You already started.”

“Is Grandpa Richard old?”

“No. For his age, he’s very young.”

“Are you going to be like him when you’re that old?”

“I rather hope so, Gus.”

Gus nodded. “You know, Daddy, I think you are in love with Justin. Only, you think you shouldn’t be. Sometimes, you make things complicated all by yourself.”

Brian choked on his ice-cream, and Justin had to pat his back for a few moments before the coughing stopped.

His eyes damp, Brian looked at his son. “I do?”

“Yes,” Gus said. “Now, I need to go to the bathroom.”

Brian was about to get up, but Justin put a hand on his shoulder. “Stay with JR, I need to go anyway.”

Brian shrugged and went back to his sundae.

Justin took a very quiet Gus to the bathroom. They did what needed to be done, and just as Justin was about to open the door, Gus looked up at him.

“I overheard my mom and yours,” he said. “Why did you leave?”

Justin sighed. “First your dad, and now you’re grilling me? I left because I was an idiot.”

“Are you still an idiot,” Gus asked seriously. “Because if you are, you can’t have him back.”

“I’m not sure,” Justin shrugged. “I hope not.”

Gus frowned up at him. “Don’t you know?”

Justin went down on one knee like Brian always did. “It’s other people who tell you when you’re being a fool. You yourself are usually the last person to know.”

“And are you in love with my dad?”

“Yes,” Justin said. “I love your father, and I’m in love with him.”

Gus nodded. “Ted said to Michael that Judson is just keeping your side of the bed warm. It didn’t sound very nice.”

Justin bit his lip. “That’s atrocious. Ted doesn’t know your dad, not one bit. He’s not like that. He doesn't use people. Whatever you do, don’t repeat that to your father. He’d be really hurt.”

“I know,” Gus said sagely. “I don’t like Ted.”

“I think Ted is one of those experiences your dad was just talking about. He can be a right asshole, but he’s got moments when he's very nice.”

Gus grinned. “But the nice moments are short, and the asshole moments are too long.”

“True,” Justin laughed. “You’re onto him.”

They returned to the table, to find JR giggling madly.

Gus smiled at her indulgently. “What’s so funny?”

“Dada is funny,” JR giggled. “You were gone such a long time! And Dada said one of you had fallen into the toilet. Or got tangled up in the towels. Or slipped on some soap. Or got all wet and were ashamed to come back.”

“Charming,” Justin muttered, giving Brian a look of mock disgust.

“Oh, oh,” JR giggled. “Now I’m in a hurry to go!”

Brian got up, swept her out of her seat and took her to the toilets.

“He always makes her laugh,” Gus said contentedly.

“It’s pretty easy to make her laugh, isn’t it?”

“Yes,” Gus said. “But we don’t laugh so much in Toronto.”

Strange, Justin thought. Why didn’t Gus call Toronto home?

“Why is that,” Justin asked.

Gus shrugged. “Our moms are always fighting.”

“Talk to your dad,” Justin urged. “He can help.”

“I’m thinking about that. Daddy said I need to know whether the need is more than the want-not, and I still don’t know,” Gus frowned.

Brian came back with JR, who was still giggling.

“You didn’t fall in,” Gus smiled.

JR shook her head. “You can’t fall in when Dada holds you. And I was in time, too!”

“Good girl,” Gus praised. “You’re learning.”

JR grinned. “Dada can move real fast.”

“Are we going home now, Daddy?”

“Why, are you tired?”

Gus shook his head. “I don’t want to go back yet.”

He looked at Brian expectantly.

Brian seemed to hesitate. “Are you tired, JR?”

JR smiled. “No! I can walk in my shoes, and everybody can see my new dress! And my hair doesn't tickle!”

Justin watched as Brian sucked his lips into his mouth. He had a feeling that Melanie was going to get an earful, sooner rather than later.

“That leaves you, Justin,” Brian said.

“No, Daddy, I’m not tired,” Justin smirked. “My hair doesn’t tickle, I can walk, and…”

Brian grabbed his neck and shook him playfully. “Cut it out, rascal.”

Justin laughed. It felt so good to mess about with Brian and the kids.

“There’s a playground in the back,” Gus said hopefully.

“Yeah, let’s,” Justin said enthusiastically. “I haven’t been on a swing in ages.”

Brian laughed, tossed some money on the table and pulled him to his feet. “We have to do something about that.”



The playground behind the ice-cream parlor was huge, and filled with equipment made by Little Tikes, the same trademark Brian used at home.

Justin realized he hadn't had so much fun in ages. Probably not since leaving Pittsburgh all those months ago.

He took JR for a fast run down the slide, the girl’s happy squeals echoing in his ears. He went on the swings with Gus and tried to beat Brian for height. They climbed all over the jungle gym, after Brian had sworn that it would hold their weight as well as that of the kids. They took turns on the roundabout, until he and Brian were out of breath, and the kids were giggling and dizzy with happiness.

“Thirsty,” JR finally announced.

“So am I,” Gus admitted.

“Me, too,” Justin grinned.

“Hey look, I acquired a third kid.” Brian rolled his eyes. “Come on, gang, time for refreshments. Ice-cream, anybody?”

The kids nodded eagerly, and Justin said, “I will if you do.”

Brian shot him another one of those quick, calculating looks, but shrugged. “Sure, why not. I think I just expanded enough energy to warrant a few more calories.”

They filed back into the ice-cream parlor and the kids begged for drinks and another strawberry sundae. Justin was startled when Brian ordered something called ‘Sunshine on Ice’ for them, and even more startled when their order arrived. Slices of peaches and pineapple were arranged in the shape of sunbeams around a mountain of vanilla and lemon ice-cream, and a thick liqueur trickled over the whole lot.

“Wow, that looks nice,” Gus commented.

Brian smiled at him. “I know it does. But it contains alcohol. No trying for you!”

Gus shrugged and went back to his strawberries.

Feeling Brian’s eyes on him, Justin cautiously tasted the heady mixture.

“Nice,” he said. “Is that pear? How come it’s so yellow?”

“Yes, it’s pear liqueur,” Brian said. “And it’s yellow because it’s colored with saffron.”

“Nice,” Justin said again, wondering what had made Brian order this. But he knew it would be better not to ask. He’d just have to take it as a compliment, and hope it had been intended as such. Or was it a blow?

Brian’s cell jingled, and he listened for a moment, his face neutral. “No, Mel, I have not abducted your daughter. I’ve just bought her some dresses to eat and some ice-cream to wear.” He winked at the little girl.

JR thought for a moment, and then burst into giggles. “Funny,” she said between hiccups. ”Dada is funny!”

“And we’ve got some hair to walk in and new shoes to drink,” Gus said loudly.

“You’ll get her back when she’s finished eating her skirts,” Brian said and closed the connection. “Jeez.”

Justin figured that Brian would think of something else that needed doing before they could head back, just to spite Mel. At least, the old Brian would have, the Brian he had thought he knew so well.

Apparently, Brian hadn’t changed that much. As soon as they stepped outside, Brian glanced at his watch and said, “We’ve forgotten something. We need to find a candy-store; I want to buy JR some candy.”

“I want candy, too,” Gus said immediately.

Brian grinned. “I thought so. Can anybody see a candy-store?”

“Down there,” Justin pointed. “You want to walk, or do we drive?”

“Let’s walk,” Brian decided. “It’s such nice day!”

Justin grinned. “Right. She’s gonna kill you, you know that, don’t you?”

Brian favored him with an innocent look. “Me? What did I do?”

Justin shook his head, surprised when Brian took JR’s hand and draped the free arm across his shoulders. Gus slipped his little warm paw into his fingers, and suddenly, Justin felt like singing.



They passed a small shop-window with a display of various frames and some decent artwork, and Gus stopped short.

“Do you have a frame at home for my picture, Daddy?”

“Actually, no, I don’t.”

“I can go in and have it framed, and you guys can go down to the candy-store,” Justin offered.

Now, why had he done that? Just when the weight of Brian’s arm on his shoulder had begun to feel familiar and comfortable again?

“You need to pop back to the car for the painting, don’t you,” Brian asked.

Justin shook his head. “No, I got it here, with my sketch-book.”

“Why do you keep dragging that infernal bag with you?”

“Habit, I guess,” Justin said. Right now, he didn’t want to tell Brian that the bag contained most of his earthly possessions, and that he was reluctant to part with what little he had.

Brian shrugged, took his arm away – damn! – and went into his wallet. He gave him his AE card, and some cash, “In case they don’t take credit cards in there.”

“What kind of frame do you want,” Justin asked.

“Something daddy will like,” Gus said.

Brian grinned. “You know just what I like, don’t you, Justin.”

Yes, he did. And obviously, Brian remembered how little it took to get him hard. Just that crooked grin, that tone of voice and that look… fuck.

Stop thinking about it, Justin told himself sternly. Too late of course, because Brian’s grin had already changed from teasing to knowing. Justin sighed.

“I’ll see you back at the car,” he said. “Have fun, kids.”

Brian raised an eyebrow at him. “Sure you don’t want to come with us? They’re bound to have something you like.”

Justin laughed ruefully and shook his head. “Forbidden fruit, unfortunately. See you!”

He pushed the door open and watched as Brian walked away, the kids holding his hands and talking nine to the dozen. A new project… how do you make that happy chattering and the patient listening visible in a drawing? Actually, it might be easier done in a painting… colors to convey sound? Damn, but he missed having a fellow artist to talk to, toss ideas around with and fight over hues and lines. Lindsay had filled that gap, to some extent. But the people at PIFA had given him a real taste for endless debates, and he still missed that.

“Can I help you, dear?”

Justin whirled at the sound of that kind, slightly rough voice. An elderly woman peered at him from behind the counter, an indulgent smile lightening her features.

“I’d like to draw you,” Justin blurted, without thinking.

The woman laughed, a merry sound. “It’s many a year since anybody said that to me,” she wheezed. “I’m sure you can find a pretty young thing to sit for you. Smile at her like that and she won’t even feel her muscles cramping!”

Justin felt his smile widen. “But I fell in love with your face. Young girls all look the same.”

“Oh, but I’m afraid your little lady won’t like hearing that!”

Justin shrugged. “It’s the truth. And those who look different I’ve already sketched.”

“Let’s see,” the woman motioned, suddenly focused and intense. “Let’s see whether you’re any good.”

Justin brought out his sketch-book, and shuffled through it until he found the sketch he had done of Daphne. He knew it was a picture he’d want on the wall, if he ever settled anywhere.

The woman took it carefully, and angled it toward the light, studying it attentively.

“Yes, yes. Done in a bit of a hurry, wasn’t it? She wasn’t sitting for you, was she? Then again, you can’t sit in any one position for long when you’re pregnant, I remember that. What a pain it is! But you’re right, that’s a face like no other. What is she, your sister?”

“She might be my little lady,” Justin smiled.

“Ah no, my boy. That’s the eye of understanding, not the eye of love. I know the difference, believe you me.”

“And how do you know she’s pregnant?”

“That look, my boy. That look. A woman recognizes it. Always.”

“She’s my friend. My oldest friend. We played in the proverbial sandbox together.”

The woman nodded and motioned for him to come into the back. “Have a seat, and show me the rest. I’m Marjorie, by the way.”

“Justin, Justin Taylor.”

“Are you, really? I saw one of your paintings… let me think. Where was it? Yes, I remember. At the emerging artist’s exhibition, about 18 months ago.”

“You remember that?”

Marjorie nodded. “I certainly do. All that frustration, the anger and the pain… you don’t forget that easily, especially when you’re my age.” She laughed again.

Justin hesitated for a moment, then handed the sketch-book over. It wasn’t in order anymore, because he had had to take sheets out when he Xeroxed them.

Marjorie took it reverently, and looked at the pictures, taking a flatteringly long time over each one.

She finally came to a sketch of Brian, just a portrait that he had done to get the feel for this new Brian, the Brian he thought he knew but didn’t understand.

“So it’s not a little lady,” Marjorie said, amused. “It’s a man. A big man. A man who fills the room, a man who has captured your heart and your mind, and you’re still fighting him.”

It was too much. “How do you get all that, from looking at one portrait?”

Marjorie shrugged. “I spent my life looking at art, and at people. Your drawing fills the page, that tells me he needs space. You have enhanced his best features, those beautiful eyes, thick lashes and luscious lips; it's very subtle, but it’s there. That tells me you’re in love. The way he looks back at you, you know he feels the same. But those eyes are sad, and hiding their pain. You’re not his to hold.”

Justin let out his breath. “Fuck, you’re good.”

“Language, young man,” Marjorie said, only half joking. “I’m old enough to appreciate manners.”

She got to her feet. “I’ll take them all, on commission. I’m sure they’ll sell, so don’t worry too much about making the rent. Come back in a week, and you can probably collect your first check.”

Justin jumped up, laughing. “I actually came in here to have a picture framed. I’m not sure those are for sale.”

“What, are you going to eat them? You need to part with some of your work, in order to continue working. I know it’s a wrench, but there it is. Give me the one you want framed, and then go through the rest. Keep only what you really can’t let go.”

Justin sighed. She was right. And it would give him a reason to come back here. Maybe he could get her to model for him, if he persisted. He gave her the picture he had done for Gus.

“It looks like a comic strip,” Marjorie commented. “It’s so guileless, it almost looks like you did it for a child.”

“It’s from a comic, and I did it for a little boy,” Justin said. “You’re too perceptive.”

Marjorie shrugged. “It runs in the family. I connect to emotion. My son can see some of the future.”

“Some of the future?”

“What do you think the future is, written in stone? A step here, a breath there and fate changes course. Even so, he is often right. For instance, he called earlier to say I’d have a very good day. And wasn’t he right!?”

Justin smiled. “Well, if I helped make it into a good day, I’m glad.”

“You did, Justin, you did. Now, what kind of frame do you want?”

“Something modern, something simple.”

“Tut. I can see that for myself, you young upstart. I meant, color-wise. To go with the room you want it in.”

“Oh,” Justin felt the blush creep into his cheeks and cursed his fair coloring, as he had done so often before. “Um, I don’t know. Probably chrome, or something like that.”

Marjorie shook her head. “Pencil drawings can’t afford the glare. Pay attention to such details, sometimes they are what sells a piece of art. I’d suggest a dull gray, if it’ll go with the furniture. Otherwise black.”

Justin tried to recall the frames of the drawings Brian had in the living room, but couldn’t. Which just proved that Brian had it licked. All you remembered was the art, not the frame.

“Gray, please,” Justin decided, and went back to sorting through his sketches. He grinned to himself when he realized that it was actually a good job that he carted all his stuff around with him.

He ended up only keeping the portraits of Daphne and his mother, and all the sketches of Brian. It was a rather thick wad of paper he handed over to Marjorie.

Marjorie smiled, clearly delighted. “There’s a good boy. You know there are more where those came from. Now, I want you to leave me that portrait of your lover. Not to sell, of course, just to advertise you.”

“Brian is going to love that. If he sees the picture here, he’ll kill me.”

“You have to take a little risk for your art,” Marjorie chortled. “He loves you, he’ll understand.”

Justin hesitated. Then again, Brian really would understand. Advertising was second nature to him, after all.

“Don’t sell it by mistake,” he warned, reluctantly giving Marjorie the portrait.

“I’d do no such thing,” she said sternly. “Besides, I rather like looking at him myself. My, what a handsome devil he is. What color are those eyes of his?”

“Hazel,” Justin said. “Some gray, some coffee, with quite a bit of green, and a few golden flecks.”

Marjorie smiled. “You spend a lot of time looking into those eyes. Don’t make things more difficult for yourself. Buy him something now, you can afford it. Something… romantic.”

“He’ll laugh his head off,” Justin said, paying for the frame with Brian’s AE card.

“He will not,” Marjorie said adamantly. “Trust me. And remember to come back next week.”

“I will,” Justin smiled. “Please think about sitting for me?”

“I’ll think about it,” Marjorie laughed. “No promises, though!”

Justin opened the door, wondering what to get Brian.

As though she had read the thought, Marjorie said, “There’s a florist next door down. Go give my friend some business!”

Justin turned and smiled. “You know what, I think I will.”



The bells above the door gave a merry little jingle when he pushed it open, and he heard a woman’s voice say, “Some sunshine today, then, Marjorie? That’s nice, very nice. I think I have a customer. Talk to you later!”

The bustling woman that came to the front of the shop could have been Marjorie’s sister. She reminded him of a plump pigeon, where Marjorie had reminded him of a sparrow. But they had the same bird-like quality, inquisitive and quick on their feet.

Justin smiled.

“So, what will it be? Red roses for your sweetheart?”

Justin shook his head, laughing. “My sweetheart is a man. I think he’d laugh me out of town if I took him roses. I need something different.”

“Different, huh? What’s he like, your man?”

“Erm, gorgeous? But that’s not what you’re asking, is it?”

“Information like that is nice to have,” the woman smiled. “But if you didn't think he was gorgeous, you’d not take him flowers in the first place. What’s the first word that comes to mind when somebody asks you to describe his character?”

“Extravagant,” Justin said instantly. “In a nice way.”

The woman smiled. “So, traditional flowers won’t do, he really would laugh at those, wouldn’t he? But I think I have just the thing for you. I’ll go arrange them. You wait here, I want you to see the finish, not the race.”

Softly chuckling to herself, the woman vanished into the back again.

Justin stepped behind a display of large tropical plants; he didn't want Brian or the kids to see him in here. He dug in his bag for his allergy meds and swallowed two of the small pills dry. Jim’s voice echoed in his head, telling him to always take pills with water. Sorry Jim, I don’t fancy drinking the stuff the flowers are standing in. That wouldn’t be good for my allergies at all. He grinned to himself.

It wasn't long before the shopkeeper returned. She held the spray into the light streaming through the large windows, and Justin caught his breath.

“My god, that's Brian in flowers,” he said. “Stunning. I just hope I can afford it.”

The woman smiled. “I’ll make you a good price. Nobody else would buy these. Most women think they’re for old ladies. But I feel they’re just right for a ritzy man.”

“They are. They are perfect for Brian.”

“Do you want me to wrap them?”

“No, thanks. I’ll take them as they are. Something that beautiful shouldn’t be hidden away, even for a moment.”

Justin paid and returned to the car, happy enough to skip a few steps.
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