Midnight Whispers
QAF Brian and Justin Fanfiction

 

Brian was wondering why he had so many drama queens in his life. First, since it was Friday night, Brian had suggested to Justin that they go out and have some fun. But the blond was getting more and more stressed with his work so he had totally queened out over the suggestion, complaining that Brian did not understand that he couldn't afford any break. The argument had been pretty heated and Brian had decided to go out anyway and release the pressure.

So then he had called Michael and agreed to pick him up and go to Babylon. However, when he arrived at Emmett's house, the two men were also in a screaming match. From what he could make out, Michael had found out that Emmett was invited to Ben's house (“the one that was my house not so long ago”) to some celebration party he was having over his last book getting great reviews and sales. Emmett argued back that he was faithful to his friends, which included both Ben and Michael, and that he had only kept silent about the invitation out of respect for Michael's feelings.

After some good advice from Brian (“Suck it up” to Michael, “I don't give a shit” to Emmett), he had finally managed to get Michael out of the house and to Babylon. Maybe it wasn't so bad that Justin hadn't come, because Michael couldn't hide his dislike of the blond. Justin didn't care and ignored him most of the times, but it wasn't really the best combination of people for partying.

Unfortunately, Brian realized pretty soon that he would have to keep relatively sober to keep an eye on Michael who also seemed intent on getting totally wasted. Brian was leaning at the bar beside him, looking appreciatively at the crowd when he noticed Michael looking at him with a smirk.

“What?”

Michael giggled.

“You're cruising that guy.”

“So?”

“He's totally your type. Tall, big shoulders, dark.”

“Again, so?”

“It's something Ben told me once. That for most straight women and gay men, the ideal man will always look like their dad when he was young. Works for you. Your type of guys, they're just like your old man.”

Brian looked at him coldly.

“Then why aren't you with some drag queen?”

“Because, you asshole, I thought my dad was a big beef military guy. You know, like Ben. And David. But that Justin guy is so not your type. You're bringing down the stats. What the hell are you doing with him?”

“You really want to know ?”

“No! Hey, I'm just trying to understand here. I mean, after all, that's why you couldn't be with me, because I'm not your type. Right? If I was taller, and did more gym, we'd totally be married now. Right?”

“Wrong. OK, Michael, that's enough, it's bedtime for you. Come on.”

“No! I want to know! If your type of men isn't really your type of men, why not me?”

Brian grabbed Michael's head between his two hands and stared at him intently.

“You know damn well. Loving you doesn't equal being in love with you. Never has, never will.”

“And Justin? You're in love with Justin?”

Brian shook his head, exasperated. So long for his fun night. There was no way he was going to explain himself to a drunken Michael in the middle of Babylon. He just grabbed his arm and drove him home.


* * *


A few weeks later, Brian laid in Justin's bed. The young man was sleeping, barely covered by a sheet; spring had come and nights were getting pretty hot. Brian was smoking, one hand leisurely stroking Justin's back, a gentle touch so as not to wake him up, just to enjoy the softness of his skin. Michael's words came back to him, and he wondered if, in a way, he hadn't been right.

His sex partners, or rather, his fuck partners, did tend to all have the same build as his father. Maybe that's why he never had any feelings for any of them; maybe that's why the fucks were all about dominance, a struggle of power. He liked to put himself in dangerous situation, bringing guys that were renowned tops in his loft, guys much bigger than him, and literally having them kneel before him.

Of course it was different with Justin. He was stronger than Justin, they both knew it and it was no big deal. Brian felt no need to dominate Justin because he knew he could overpower him, but he also knew Justin wasn't afraid of him and trusted him not to hurt him. It was a perfect match, one that allowed Brian to find new pleasure in sex, to let go and just get carried away. That had never happened before. It was probably why he let Justin top him regularly. Not frequently, but in less than a year, Justin had topped him more than he had been in his whole life.

He remembered the first time it had happened. Justin was spending the night at the loft, which was a rare occurrence. When he had opened his drawer looking for a condom, Brian had found some silk ties that he used from time to time. He had set them on the bed, smiling, but Justin's terrified expression had frozen him. It wasn't even a conscious decision, but he hadn't hesitated. He had laid on the bed, putting his arms above his head, and told Justin to tie him up. Justin had hesitated but seeing Brian's quiet confidence, he had complied. Justin had been so scared to hurt him that the sex had been extremely soft and Brian couldn't deny that he had enjoyed it.

But afterwards, when Justin had untied him, he had burst crying and Brian had held him tight in his arms for a long time. He didn't ask him any questions and Justin hadn't given any explanations. But the next night, it was Justin who had pulled out the ties, and he hadn't freaked out when Brian had secured them on his wrists. The trust that Justin had given him  that night had moved Brian to the core.

He knew Justin had lived many terrifying things in his past, that he was not willing to discuss. Since Brian felt exactly the same way about his childhood, he was not about to push Justin into revealing anything. From times to times, one of them would let out slip something of his past and Brian wondered which of them had had it worst. He had only questioned him once, not realizing until it was too late that it was a difficult subject.

It had been after a window talk, one quiet night, both men knowing that one of them was going to cross the street shortly afterwards, and just enjoying the moment. Brian had complained jokingly that it wasn't fair that while he was the oldest, Justin had so much experience in the boyfriend thing while he had 0. He then casually had asked if Justin had ever done it raw. Justin had took a few seconds before answering softly “Not willingly.” Brian had remained paralyzed for a few seconds before answering. “It doesn't count then. One day, you and me, we'll do it raw together, and it will be the first time for both of us.”

Yes, Michael had probably been partly right, his usual type of men were just a mean for him to take control over men that reminded him of his father, and of situations in which he had been totally powerless and abused physically as a child.

Of course, that didn't explain why it was Justin that made him feel this way, when there where so many blond twinks. It just was.


* * *

Brian parked his car and prepared himself for the outside heat before opening the door. He was walking hurriedly towards his building when he was stopped by a piercing whistle. He turned and looked up, spotting Justin sitting on his window sill, smoking peacefully.

He was stunned. Justin was always at his studio at this hour, only coming up when he called him on his phone before joining him for a quick meal before returning to work. He was panicked by the upcoming deadline and Brian knew he hadn't left the building for days.

He saw Justin taking his cell and took his out of his pocket.

“Hey.”

“It's done.”

Brian kept silent for a moment.

“Can I see it?”

“Yep. Coming down.”


A few seconds later, the door opened and Brian was met by a smiling Justin that took his hand and led him silently inside the working space.

Brian hadn't been allowed inside for a month now, and the public visits had stopped at the same time. Only Justin and his assistants had seen the last part of the projects so Brian had only a vague idea of what he was about to see.

He stood breathless.

A tall structure was standing; Brian knew it was made of fabric but couldn't have told otherwise, it looked alive. He also knew it was painted but it looked as if it was carved. But the most amazing was that the design kept changing, at first Brian thought he was looking at a desert landscape with a few figures but then it turned out it was a forest, then a crowded city.

He stood for a while, mesmerized. He turned around a few times, enjoying the changes of scenery.

“You can touch it. In fact, you must touch it, it's part of the experience.”

So Brian carefully put his hands on the structure, and found it both soft and warm, and had the surprise of feeling it moving, as if it was breathing.

He turned to look at Justin, who was patiently waiting.

“You're a genius. You know that? You're a fucking genius.”

Justin beamed at him.

“A starving genius. Take me to dinner.”


* * *


Brian was carefully pondering on his choice of clothing. It wasn't a formal event, but it was an important one. Justin had decided to thank the students that had assisted him during his residency by having a private pre-inauguration party at the Yoly building. No photographs would be allowed, since the official inauguration would take place in a few days, at City Hall, where the artwork was to be moved the next day. Tonight was just a friendly event, for, in addition to the art students, family and friends. Of course, Justin's family would not attend, and Daphne couldn't make it. But Justin had invited Brian's crew and Emmett was catering. Mrs Yoly was expected to make an appearance, and so was Catherine Dell.

As soon as Brian entered the building, an overexcited Justin jumped in his arms.

“You're here!” and kissed him passionately before pulling back and dragging him to introduce him to a group of about 20 students that were gathered near the buffet. Brian accepted the  admiring looks with his usual blasé attitude and then went around the room with a drink, leaving Justin and his students laughing happily.

He was pleasantly surprised to see Michael arriving with Debbie and Carl; Michael had first refused the invitation, claiming he had a prior engagement so it was nice to see him try to get along with Justin. Justin bounced to greet the newcomers. They were soon joined by Lindsay, with a smiling Gus that immediately went to stand between Brian and Justin, taking their hands in his. Justin was steering them towards the buffet, when Michael stopped dead in his tracks. They all looked at him, surprised to see his livid face. He turned to Justin accusingly.

“You son of a bitch. You did it on purpose.”

Justin looked at him blankly. “What are you talking about?”

“Him!”

Michael pointed a finger to a young male student who seemed extremely queasy. Debbie let out a “oh shit!”. Brian immediately understood that the kid had to be Ben's new lover. He could kick himself, because Michael had showed him pictures of the guy he had found on internet, but he hadn't paid attention, having 0 interest in Ben's love life. He sighed, frustrated. So much for getting along, Michael would never believe that this was a mere coincidence. He caught Emmett's eyes and saw that the man was devastated. Of course, Emmett had known all along that Ben's new beau was working with Justin and had kept silent. On cue, Michael called to him. “And thanks to you too, you traitor. It's nice to see how faithful you are.”

And Michael turned away and left, while Debbie walked after him, trying to calm him down. Brian leaned in Justin's ear and whispered. “One of your students, the dark blond one, is Michael's ex new lover.” Justin's eyes widened. They looked at each other for a while and … burst laughing. They calmed down quickly at Debbie's outrage look. “Shit, I'm sorry, I think I'm doomed as long as Michael is concerned. I swear, I had no idea. I've never even met Richard's partner.”
Debbie smiled in acceptance and patted his cheek. “Hey, shit happens, I'll talk to Michael later, he'll understand.”

After the little drama, the evening went on well. Debbie was having a great time among the group of students. Mrs Yoly had arrived and Lindsay had rushed to her side, the two women seemingly having a pleasant conversation, same as, surprisingly, Catherine Dell and Carl.

Brian was heading out for a smoke when he noticed a new person at the door. Shit, Anatol. Where the fuck was the bodyguard? Just as he looked around for Carl, he saw Catherine Dell march towards Anatol. He rushed to her side but stopped dead on his tracks when he saw the big man looking sheepishly down at his feet while she was talking to him. Fascinated, he came closer and heard her icy voice.

“...so you better behave or I'll get angry, do you hear me?”

“Yes ma'am.”

“Good. Now go get something to eat. And remember, I'm watching you.”

“Yes ma'am.”

And Anatol walked inside to the buffet and started silently filling in a plate, not paying attention to anyone. Catherine turned around and came face to face with a smirking Brian.

“Catherine, and here I was, thinking you were totally useless. So you do have some talent.”

“That's still Mrs Dell to you. And don't tell me you let Anatol impress you? All it takes is a little authority, I can give you lessons, you seem to need them.”

“Unfortunately, your authority only works on feeble minds, Cathy, it's totally wasted on me.”

The two glared at each other before turning away in opposite directions. But both were smiling when they were certain the other couldn't see.


* * *

Finally, the final guest left. Brian and Justin were left alone in the building with Emmett and his crew who finished cleaning up. Both men sat on the floor next to each other in a corner, sipping some champagne. They kept quiet for a while, both lost in their thoughts.

“Well, Sunshine, you did it.”

“I did, didn't I?” answered Justin dreamily. “Tomorrow morning, it's getting moved to City Hall. And it won't move again, except to go to MOMA. Catherine says I'll make national news at the inauguration. Major art critics are going to be there too. After that, both the MOMA exhibit and the Art shelter deal are a done thing.”

“I'm proud of you, you know that?”

Justin looked at Brian. “I never thanked you. I know I've been awful those last months. There were times when I really thought you were going to break up with me and I would have deserved it. But you were always so supportive, you have no idea how much that means to me.”

Brian smiled. “So show me.”


* * *


Brian was woken up abruptly by his buzzer. He checked the time. 3 am. Who the fuck? He got tiredly out of bed and headed to the door. As soon as he pressed the intercom, he heard a man's voice yelling something about a fire. He turned back towards his window.

There was smoke coming out of the Yoly building.

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