Midnight Whispers
QAF Brian and Justin Fanfiction

 

 

Justin's POV

To: Brian Kinney

From: Justin Taylor

Subject: Important

Hey, hubby!

Where's your phone? Answer it!

The thing is…you're going to freak out big time. I know I did. I'm still shaking.

Call when you see this.

It's about Gus.

Yours truly,

Justin

PS: Don't panic. He's fine. I love you.


I hit send, raising my eyes to Gus, who was watching me sullenly from the armchair across the room. I sighed loudly, rubbing my temple.

I didn't sign up for this shit when I accepted happily to be his dad, too.

When the door bell had rung earlier, Gus was the last person I expected to see on our doorstep. His arrival had pulled me out of sleep, after a long night working under Brian. I only pulled my boxers on, before rushing to answer the door.

I was greeted by a smiling Gus. "I hope it's not a bad time," he'd told me, holding his backpack by the strap, his wide eyes on mine.

It didn't take me long to realize he was alone. Gus explained nonchalantly that his moms had cancelled their planned trip to the States for Thanksgiving. He got upset and stole Lindsay's credit card, bought a ticket, and got on the plane by easily making it look like he was with the nice, old lady who offered him candy.

By that time in the plot, I was ready to faint. He reassured me he didn't take anything from the old lady, but he did eat all the nuts the flight attendant gave him.

"Your father is going to be so upset," I repeated for the umpteenth time in the past half an hour.

I'd been telling him the same thing ever since I snapped out of my funk and pulled him inside the house. In between chiding him for his foolishness to leave home and come all the way to Pittsburgh alone, I kept trying to reach Lindsay and Brian. Lindsay's phone was off, and Brian didn't pick up, hence the e-mail.

Their child was missing and they weren't around their phones, or had them off. Of course, they didn't know he was missing, or maybe Lindsay did.

I narrowed my eyes at Gus, who shrunk further in the armchair.

He was saved by Brian's response to my e-mail.

To: Justin Taylor

From: Brian Kinney

Subject: in a meeting

Is Gus OK?

Brian Kinney

CEO Kinnetik

PS: DON'T call me that!


To: Brian Kinney

From: Justin Taylor

Subject: RE: in a meeting

Yup, hubby.

Call me when you're out of the meeting.


"Is that Dad?"

"Yes. I haven't told him much. He'd be worried sick!"

Gus pouted, fiddling fingers in his lap. "I just missed you guys."

"Do you have any idea how worried everyone in Toronto must be?"

"They don't know I left."

I scratched my jaw, at a loss how to make him understand the gravity of what he had done. "I figured. I wonder what's wrong with Linz's phone."

He gave me a guilty smile. "I stole that too. But it died on the plane. I got bored and played on it."

"I don't have Mel's new number. I don't suppose you know it?" I raised a brow.

He shook his head, looking away.

"Jesus Christ, Gus! I can't believe you did something like this!"

"I'm sorry," he said in a small voice.

After a few minutes of silence, where I tried not to picture Lindsay's or Melanie's worried faces when they discovered their son was missing, Gus came to sit next to me on the sofa.

"You cut your hair." He touched the side of my head with a finger.

I gave him my best WTF look. This was not a time to discuss my shorter hair. But typical Brian, he tried to change the subject.

"It's nice," he insisted, brushing his fingers through my hair. "Did your mom make you cut it? My mom always chides me about not wanting to get a haircut."

"I wanted to shorten it," I said curtly. "Look, Gus, if you're a big boy – enough to fly on your own, you're going to tell your parents about your deed without being too worried."

"Will you be here, Jus?"

When I saw tears springing into his eyes, I forgot all about guilt tripping him. I couldn't stand the sight of him upset.

So I pulled him into my arms, hugging him tightly. "I'll be right here, by your side," I promised, kissing the top of his head. "How about we find a charger and try calling your mom?"

Before we could start tracking a charger, my phone rang loudly. I pushed it to Gus, showing him the caller ID. He shook his head wildly, watching me with terrified, hazel eyes.

Sighing, I answered, "Hey, Brian."

"Is Gus okay? I tried Linz, but her phone is off."

"Yeah, about that… Can you come home?"

"Justin, what's going on? Tell me."

Keeping my eyes on Gus, I replied as cheerfully as I could, "We have a visitor."

There was a commotion on his side of the line, where he commanded Cynthia to reschedule everything, then he was back talking to me. "They actually came for Thanksgiving!"

He was so excited, I didn't have the heart to correct him. Besides, I wanted him to get home in one piece.

"See you soon. Drive carefully. It snowed again," I advised him.

"Yes, mother."

After hanging up with Brian, I pulled Gus back into my arms. "We're going to do three things now."

He nodded, sniffing into my chest.

"First, you need to stop crying." I wiped his tears with my thumbs. "Second, we'll find a charger for your mom's phone."

"And third?" he mumbled, staring into my eyes.

"We need a good speech for when your daddy gets home. We don't want to scare him, okay?"

"Do you think Dad will hate me?" His broken voice made my heart break.

"Gussy, he can't hate you. Brian loves you more than anyone else." I stroked his head, shushing him.

"Promise?"

"I promise." I kissed his forehead. "Come on, we have plans." I pulled him off the couch.

Sadly, no charger in the house worked for Lindsay's phone. I hoped Brian had Mel's new number. I berated myself for not saving it in my own phone when they called to let us know she had to change her number after she had her phone stolen.

While we discussed how we were going to approach Gus's visit, I heated some leftovers and sat him down at the kitchen table. Once I convinced him no one would hate him, he started picking through his food.

When Brian arrived, the front door slamming shut after him, Gus dropped the fork on his plate, paling.

Brian appeared in the kitchen doorway, with a big smile on his face. "Gus! Come here, Sonny Boy." He opened his arms.

Instead of rushing over there, Gus scooted closer to me, whimpering.

I rubbed his arm soothingly.

"Oh, you're too cool for your old man?" Brian joked, approaching us, not noticing how distressed his son was. "Where's Linz?" He met my eyes.

I averted mine, still silently encouraging Gus to talk. I hoped he still remembered our little conversation about how I helped him come visit when he called saying he missed us. It was our little secret, though it was faulty considering he did steal his mom's phone and credit card. It was worth a shot, though.

"What's going on?" Brian eyed us suspiciously, leaning against the table.

"I screwed up, Daddy!" Gus wailed.

I wanted to bang my head against the table.

Fuck! Trust him to ruin our little speech with his panic.

Brian knelt at his son's feet. "Tell me. I'll help you fix it."

"You'll hate me!" Gus sobbed loudly.

The look of horror on Brian's face was quickly replaced by such raw pain, I had to look away or I'd join Gus in his sobbing fest.

"I need your phone. To call Mel. Gus has Lindsay's phone, but its battery died," I explained.

Brian handed me his phone automatically, not taking his eyes off Gus.

"Don't go, Jus! You promised to stay with me!" Gus grabbed my arm with both his hands.

"I'm right here," I said softly.

"Is anyone going to tell me what's going on?" Brian finally tore his eyes off Gus, to fixate me with an inquisitive look.

"Moms cancelled our trip here. I was upset at them. Very upset. I stole Mom's card and phone and left."

"And I woke up with him on our doorstep at ten this morning."

Brian stood abruptly. "You left?" He thundered.

Gus shrunk into my side. I rubbed his back.

"What do you mean, you left? Alone? Fucking Christ, Gus!" Brian started pacing, muttering under his breath, "We need to call and let them know you're alive. How fucking irresponsible! So stupid!"

"Moms won't know I'm missing until later. I told them I was having a sleepover at Carter's."

I wished I could have made him keep that from an angry Brian. It was news even to me, but I could see a vein pulsing against Brian's temple.

From how happy he'd been minutes ago when he saw Gus, his behavior had changed one-eighty. He was Rage in all his glory.

Making a sharp turn, Brian came to me. "Call Melanie. Tell her everything he's done. Also, tell her I'll take the wayward son back with the first plane to Toronto, and I'll assist them in giving him the right punishment for running away."

I didn't have a choice but to take the phone and leave the room. "I'll be right back," I whispered in Gus's ear.

"No. Jus, don't go!"

"Go, Justin. I need to speak to my son alone." Brian's cold voice was something I knew. It usually ended up with him yelling hurtful things he didn't mean to me. Now, it would be Gus at the receiving end, and I couldn't have that.

I went to him cupping his cheek. "Don't do or say anything you'll regret later," I pleaded, pecking his lips.

His eyes flashed, glowing in his anger.

The second I was in the hallway, Brian slammed the kitchen door shut, making me jump. Shit.

"You better have a good explanation, besides that bullshit about missing us, or being upset at your moms! Do you realize what you've done, what could have happened to you! Fuck, Gus! Fuck. Fuck. Fuck."

Something broke on the other side of the door, but I willed my legs to take me down the hall.

Mel answered on the first ring. "Funny you decided to call now, Brian!"

"Huh? Oh, it's me—Justin." I realized it was Brian's name she saw on her phone.

"Oh, hey, Justin. Honey, look we have a bit of a situation. How about we call you later?" Mel suggested.

"He's here," I choked out, as more shouts came from the kitchen.

"What?"

"Gus is here. He's with Brian at the moment."

"Is he alright?" Linz's voice came over. "Please, tell me he's safe."

"Don't worry, Linz. Gus is fine. Brian said he'd bring him back as soon as possible. I'm sorry he scared you like that."

"It's not your fault, honey," Mel said softly.

"How did he get there? Oh, my God. He's fine. I thought I'd die when Carter's mom told us Gus was never there," Linz added, sniffing loudly.

"He stole your credit card and phone. He's a smart kid."

"Takes after his father," Mel muttered.

"Can you put him on the phone? I need to hear his voice," Lindsay begged.

I wasn't sure if it was a good idea to disturb them, but Linz sounded so heartbroken. "Hold on."

I went back to the kitchen, which was suspiciously quiet. Upon opening the door, I found Gus at the table, sobbing with his arms around himself.

There was no trace of Brian, but the back door opened wide gave me an idea of his whereabouts.

"Gussy," I whispered, stroking his head. He turned, wrapping his arms around my waist, and continued crying into my stomach. "Your mom wants to talk to you. Here. She's not upset. She's relieved you're safe." I offered him the phone.

"Dad hates me. Like a lot."

"No, he doesn't." I put the phone in his hand. "Talk to your mom."

"Dad said there was a reason he never wanted children. He doesn't want me." Tears cascaded down his cheek, making me want to strangle Brian.

I had specifically told him to be careful with his empty threats.

The worst part of Gus's confession was Linz and Mel being able to hear it.

"I'll check on him," I said, leaving him to his phone call.

It took me a few minutes to find Brian. He was at the gazebo, propped on the banister with his fingers squeezing it tightly, eyes staring blankly at the snow covered ground.

"Brian." I touched his shoulder gently. He shrugged me off. "Brian, I know you're upset and scared."

"You don't know anything! Leave me the fuck alone!"

"No."

Throwing me a glare, he marched away toward the tennis court.

After contemplating whether Gus would be okay on his own for a few minutes, I decided to follow Brian. I had to pull him away from whatever dark place he had gone.

"You don't give up, do you?" he grumbled, falling on a bench.

"No. I don't. I thought you knew that by now."

"I'm not going to talk." He lay on the bench, staring at the ceiling.

I sat next to him, taking his hand. "Brian, Gus missed you. I bet you'd have done the same if you were in his place."

He scowled, not tearing his eyes off the ceiling. "I never had an overwhelming feeling of being around my dad."

"I did," I admitted, stroking his fingers. "He was usually gone with business, and when he was home, I made the most of that time." I played with his wedding band, twisting it round and round, trying not to think too much of these happy times.

"But…he pushed you away when he was home?" He cut his eyes to me.

"No, Brian. Despite the way he's treating me now, we were once close. Why the fuck do you think it hurt so much when he gave me that ultimatum? When I had no choice but to live with you or Debbie." I bit my lip in an attempt to keep me from crying.

"Well, I'm not that close with Gus," he retaliated.

"Yes, you are. You are an amazing father. Don't judge yourself too harshly, and please don't compare yourself to your father!"

He cringed, snatching his hand away. "You have no idea what you're talking about."

"Then fucking tell me!" I cried out, exasperated.

"I can't. And I am like Jack." He sniffed, covering his face. "I screamed at my son. What he did is wrong, but I should have explained why it's not okay to run away like that."

"See? You are a good father," I said, hoping to keep him from comparing himself to Jack.

Brian sat up, staring into my eyes, tears pooling into his. He slowly lifted his right hand, then fisted it, letting a few tears fall. "I raised my hand at him," he said in a gruff voice.

Holy shit. I stared at him in shock, unsure what to say.

"I didn't hit him, but in that moment I saw Jack in front of my eyes. It reminded me of when they sent me to buy bread and I spent the change on candy. He didn't explain why he was suddenly using me as his personal punching bag."

I choked through the knot in my throat, engulfing him in a tight hug. "Brian, you're not your father. You love Gus. You'd never hurt him," I said into his ear, hoping it helped him.

"I was so angry."

"But you've cooled off now and you realize you need to talk calmly to him."

He sniffed, wiping a hand under his nose and pulling away from me. "Does he hate me?"

I bit my lip, shaking my head. "It's kind of the other way round. He thinks you no longer want to be his dad." I groaned, tugging gently at a lock of his hair. "I told you not to say anything you might regret! You told him you wished he wasn't born!"

"Not in so many words. See, Justin? I'm terrible at this. He hates me."

"Hate is a strong word. Anyway, don't worry. That's why you have me." I kissed him softly, stroking his cheek. "Let's go kiss and make up."

Begrudgingly he let me drag him back home by the hand.

Chapter End Notes:

Brian's worst fears coming to life... Do you think he overreacted? I hope I kept him in character as much as possible. :)

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