Justin sat in his room; well, Michael’s room to be precise.  His year was about to be over; he was turning eighteen tomorrow.  Three days ago, he would have been willing to give it all up and stay with the love of his life, Brian Kinney.  He would have been willing to live this boring, “normal” life just to be with his man.  He would have been willing to not see Michelle, his partner, his big sister, and his best friend, ever again.  He would have been willing to give up the life he had been destined to lead and was trained for…

But last night, an argument had made him see everything differently.  Brian hadn’t changed; he was the same Brian he had met a year ago. He thought he had been getting somewhere; that Brian’s walls were finally starting to come down, but nothing had changed.  Brian didn’t care about him.

First Justin had been confused; now he was just angry and disillusioned. 

He remembered the last conversation he had had with Michelle the night before he had left to try living in the “real world:” 

Flashback…One Year Ago…

“Sooo – are you nervous?” She asked him, sitting cross legged on her bed as he had peered over at her from his place on the mattress, his arms crossed in front of him.

“Um, no,” he answered, trying to sound confident, but she saw right through him.

“Liar!” Michelle responded, poking him in the side of his stomach as he had flinched with a soft laugh.

“Ok, Ok, I'm really nervous!” Justin admitted readily.  “What did YOU do on your first night?”

She smiled impertinently at him.  “Well... what do you think?”

His eyes widened in disbelief.  “Really?! On your first night?”

She grinned.  “Well, sure! I wanted to get it out of the way.”

He laughed.  “If you were so anxious, why you didn't do it while you were here? It's not a woman’s prison, you know!”

“Come on, Blue! You know I only choose a man based on their fighting skills... and it just happens to be that the only man who's up for the job is shorter than me…”

“And gay,” he quickly reminded her as he laughed.

Michelle winked at Justin.  “Yeah! I forgot about that little detail!” Her voice softened as she added, “I’m going to miss you, Blue.”

He smiled wistfully at her.  “I’m going to miss you, too, Michelle.” 

She looked at him tearfully.  “Promise me that you’ll come back when your year is over.”

“I promise!” He told her as her face brightened in response.  “I mean, what can ever keep me away from my best friend AND the joy of killing bad people?” 

“Good!” She answered him, looking relieved.  “Then I'll be here to greet you when this awful year is over.”

Justin reached for her and hugged her tightly as he vowed, “It's a date!”

End Flashback….

Who knew, though, that on the first night he would meet the person who would change everything? Brian…

But how could he stay after what had happened last night?

Last Night – Liberty Diner

Justin had just finished his shift at the diner; walking into the loft he was tired from a long day and he had really missed Brian.  He had called his lover an hour before the end of his shift to make sure Brian was going to be there when he got home.  

Home….

He really felt like the loft WAS his home… too bad that statement had echoed in Brian’s ear, too, but had taken on a different sort of meaning. 

Justin wound up returning to an empty loft; after showering he called Brian’s cell, but there had been no answer.  After a few hours and six unreturned calls, Brian had finally stepped into the loft, high and very drunk.


Justin had gazed at him in confusion.  “Brian? What's going on?”

“Well, hello there, Sunshine! I see you came **home!** (He remembered Brian spitting out the word like it was a curse.)

“Yes, I'm here... just like we planned, and… “

“Planned??” Brian had retorted, cutting Justin off before he could finish.  “Hell, no, Sunshine; I didn’t plan anything!”  He had told him to Justin’s dismay, turning to walk into the kitchen as he turned his back on him.

Justin had been so fucking angry; Brian was lucky he loved him so much because he thought about how he could have hurt him so bad he’d be begging for death.  Fuck knows he had been there, done that before, more times than he could count by now.  He had found himself struggling to keep his assassin side at ease because he knew if this beast was awakened, there would be no stopping it. He remembered fighting to remain calm before he had replied, “What are you talking about?  I don’t understand.”

To his surprise, Brian had retorted harshly, “I told you before; stop trying to make me into a lesbian!  I can see right through you, do you understand?”

All Justin could do was blink, stupefied, as Brian had continued, “Let me make this straight.”  He had laughed at the irony.  “I’m NOT your boyfriend and this is not your "home," so would you please just for once stop acting like we’re some bullshit fairytale couple?  You're not Cinderella and I'm no fucking Prince Charming!”

Silently Justin had blinked again as he finally took Brian's words in.  Looking at the floor he took a deep breath, feeling Brian watching him as he raised his head and looked at him with a weird sort of angry stare.  He could remember the fear reflected back at him for just a second, knowing Brian had never seen such a look before in his eyes before he had stated simply, “Clearly.” 

With a glare at Brian that could have burned a hole in his face, Justin turned around and left.