Midnight Whispers
QAF Brian and Justin Fanfiction
Author's Chapter Notes:

Chapter 165 added 5/15/13

 

Chapter 165:  Sorry is Bullshit!

 

 “So what is it that you need from me, Brian?”  Michael asked as he settled in the back seat of the cab and got comfortable.

 

“Driver,” Brian said to the cabbie.  “I’ve changed my mind about going to my hotel.”  Brian then gave the driver a name of a club to take Michael and him to instead.  He then turned and talked with Michael.  “You said Justin has forgiven you?”

 

“Yes, he has.”

 

“What does that mean, exactly?”  Brian asked.

 

“Huh?  I’m not following you?”

 

“It amazes me that he’s forgiven you, but how close does that put you to the situation?”

 

“Huh?  What do you mean?”

 

“You offered earlier to arrange for me to see Gus?  Are you in good enough with Justin to actually make that happen?”

 

“Sure, Brian.  I can do that for you. I’m sure Justin won’t have any issues with you seeing Gus.”

 

“But I’d rather the meeting take place without Justin’s knowledge.”

 

“Oh,” Michael vexed.  “I’m not sure how easily that can be done; and how much time do you want to spend with your son, and wouldn’t Gus tell Justin about the meeting?”

 

“I want to spend just enough time with Gus to say a proper goodbye to him, and if I ask my son to promise not to tell Justin – he won’t.  Gus is never one to break a promise.”

 

“What?  How do you mean that exactly – say a proper goodbye to Gus?  It’s almost sounds like you’re giving up your son, Brian?”

 

“I am.”

 

“What!”  Michael was absolutely dumbfounded.   “Have you gone insane!  I could never imagine you giving up Gus!  I thought you loved your son just as much as you love Justin?”

 

“Of course I love them both, Michael.  But I’ve already lost them.”

 

“Oh fuck, Brian!  You really let what Melanie said sink right in there – didn’t you!  But don’t you believe even ONE word that that bitch said.  She’s full of resentment.  I know because regardless that Justin and my ma has forgiven me, Melanie won’t budge one inch, and it’s only because of her persuasion that Lindsay hasn’t forgiven me yet.  So, Brian don’t let what she said influence you in a way that makes you want to give up your son.  Think of Gus.  He needs his REAL dad.  Don’t let what Melanie said get under your skin like that!”

 

“Can you do it, Michael?  Can you arrange the final meeting with Gus?  Also, I need you to do one more thing for me.”

 

“I’m sure I can find a way to bring Gus to you, but what else do you need me to do for you?”

 

“What I further need from you, Michael, is information and surveillance.”

“Huh?  Information and surveillance?  What are you talking about, Brian?  Information and surveillance about what?”

 

“On Justin and his husband.”

 

“What?  Do you mean you want me to spy on them for you, Brian?”

 

Brian cocked his brows at Michael just then.  “Why not?  Why do you look so stunned?  Isn’t that what you’ve always done best, Mike?”

 

“Yeah, but that’s my biggest regret and downfall, and it shocks me that you would ask me to do that for you.  I can’t believe you want me to spy on Justin and his husband for you! And, why?  Is it because you haven’t really given up on Justin and Gus?  Do you want to know all that is going on so you can figure out a way to get your husband and son back?”

 

“No, Michael, that’s not the reason.  What Melanie said was true.  I really don’t deserve either of them back.  Right now all I want for them is their happiness even if it excludes me from their lives.  I’ve been very selfish with Justin and Gus.  I don’t want to be that anymore; but before I completely sever ties with my husband and son, I need to know that they both are happy and safe.  So, I just need to know that my family is in good hands with the doctor, and then I can peacefully move on.”

 

“But Brian, I can’t advise you where Justin’s concerned, but you can’t give up on your son like that.  Melanie was totally wrong in that aspect.  Gus still loves you and needs you, Brian!  You’re making a grave mistake, and haven’t you made enough of them already – no sense in making another one!”

 

“I watched my son at the wedding, Michael.  I watched Justin too, and it didn’t seem like either of them had me on their minds.  So, I think it’s time everyone moved on with his life.  So, don’t argue with me, just do like I tell you.”

 

“But…”

 

“No buts about it, Mike Novot!”  Brian scoffed.  “You said you want my forgiveness then do what I tell you.  Arrange the meeting with Gus, and keep an eye on my husband and son, and let me know that everything is alright with the new man in their lives.”

 

“Oh,” Michael whined.

 

“Hey,” Brian murmured.

 

“Yeah?”  Michael replied.

 

“What can you tell me thus far about Justin’s doc?”

 

“His name is Clay Masterson, and he seems to be a really nice person, but I don’t know much about him.  I only met him a month ago here in Paris.  In fact, that was the same day that Justin met him.  Were you aware that Justin only known the doctor for a month?”

 

“Yes, I’ve been made aware of that,” Brian commented, “Now what else can you tell me?”

 

“Like I said, I don’t know much but I tell you all that I know so far.  Clay saved Justin adopted son J.C.’s life, and earlier today he doctored on Justin’s grandmother; but there’s one really particular thing about him you might find quite interesting though.”

 

“What’s that?”

 

“Ethan and Chris have known Clay longer than anyone else has.”

 

“Ethan and Chris!  That makes me rest assure,” Brian sarcastically mocked.  “Were Ethan and Chris at today’s nuptials as well?  I didn’t notice them there.”

 

Michael nodded.  “Yeah, they were there.  I guess your eyes were mostly focused on Justin and your son after all, huh?”

 

“Yes, pretty much so.”

 

“I guess you will always love Justin, huh?”

 

“Yeah, always have and always will love him, Michael; but after all that have transpired between us I know I’ll never get him back.  So, pretty much like I said earlier:  therefore I just have to accept that, but before I move on I have to know that he’s all right though, especially if my son goes where he goes.”

 

“But how can you give up on Gus like that, Brian?”

 

“Gus doesn’t need me anymore, Michael.  He has Justin, another new dad, and a new little brother too now.  What does anyone need me for?  I’ve become totally dispensable.”

 

“Nobody can replace Gus’s real dad, Brian.”

 

“How many times do I have to tell you, Michael, that I saw Gus at the wedding.  I saw how happy he was without me.  I saw how happy both my boys were without me.”

 

“Brian, I don’t like this new you.   Where’s your backbone?  It’s not like you not to fight for what you want.”

 

“I know, Michael, but I’ve hurt too many people already.  I can’t go back now.”

 

“Why not, Brian.  I did it.  I went back and people forgave me.”

 

“I’m greedy and selfish, Michael.  Forgiveness is not enough for me – I’d want more than just that.  But I mustn’t pursue anyone and disrupt their lives.  I hurt too many people already.”

 

“Brian, even if you don’t reconcile with anyone else, you have to with Gus at least.  Don’t make the same mistake twice.  Maybe it IS too late for Justin and you, but I don’t think it’s too late for your son and you.”

 

“Michael, are you even sure you can accomplish all of this for me?”

 

“Huh?”

 

“You said Justin has forgiven you, but I can’t imagine that necessarily makes you and him bosom-buddies now?”

 

“I’m a lot closer to the situation than you might ever imagine, Brian.”

 

“Huh?  How do you figure?”

 

“I’m right in there, Brian.  Justin and I are actually working very closely together these days.”

 

“Huh?  What?”

 

“Justin and I are collaborating on a comic book.”

 

“What?  You’re kidding me, right?”  Brian chortled.

 

“No.  We really are actually creating a commix together.  I do all the storytelling and write the dialogue, while Justin does all the illustrations.  It’s a unique comic book because it has a gay theme.  Justin said it might be the first of it’s kind, and if we market it just right, we’re liable to amass a great fortune.”

 

“Hmm, absolutely unbelievable.  Good though – fabulous actually.  Sounds like you are definitely in there.  So, make that meeting between my son and me happen, as well as keep an eye out for their welfare, and just maybe then I will be able to forgive you – but no promises though.”

 

“Sure Brian, I’ll make that meeting happen for you.  In fact, I could probably do that really soon for you, if you like.  I heard Melanie tell you that Justin went to Germany for his honeymoon and that a few people (including Gus) went to Germany too.”

 

“Yeah, and so?”

 

“Umm… Justin is going to be touring over there for quite a while, so I was going there eventually anyway to work on the comic book with him.  But, I don’t think it would seem the least bit strange if I flew there early and joined everyone.  You can fly there too,"  Michael suggested, "And I’ll find a way to sneak Gus away and deliver him to you.  What do you think?”

 

“Doesn’t sound like a bad idea, at all,” Brian agreed.  “I’ll have my pilots fly both of us over there first thing tomorrow morning, if you’d ready to go that soon?”

 

“That’s no problem.  I can go that soon, and once we get there I’ll keep you abreast of things, but what if…” Michael paused.

 

“Huh?  What’s wrong?”  Brian asked.  “What if… what?”

 

“What if I find out that the doctor isn’t good for Justin and your son after all?  What do you want me to do then, Brian?”

 

“Huh?  I haven’t really thought about that?  Any reason you might think ill fated about Justin’s doc?”

 

“I dunno,” Michael mumbled, and then looked away from Brian, and turned his attention to the window and looked out at the passing scenery instead and then appeared to concentrate immensely about something.

 

“Hey, what’s on your mind?”  Brian badgered Michael.

 

“Oh… nothing.”

 

“Hey, I know you.  You’re contemplating on something, so answer my previous question!  Does something about Justin’s new husband have you concerned?”

 

“Not really,” Michael said as he looked back away from the window, and resumed eye contact with Brian.   “It’s just at times he seems TOO PERFECT, and you know the old saying about something seeming too good to be true.”

 

“Hmm, yeah.  I know that old saying – might have actually applied to me when I was married to Justin.  Maybe our marriage – the second one (at least) – was too good to be true.”

 

“I’m so sorry, Brian.”

 

“Stop apologizing, Michael.  What’s done is done – nothing we can do to change that now.”

 

“But you didn’t answer my question, Brian.  What do you want me to do if things aren’t alright with Justin’s new husband?”

 

“And, you didn’t quite answer my question either.  What makes you think that things wouldn’t be?”

 

“Well…” Michael paused long again.

 

“Well what?  Is there something you know but you’re not telling me?”

 

“I’m not sure.  It could just be my inflated imagination… but some occurrences that happened at the wedding today seem quite strange or suspect to me.”

 

“Huh?”  Brian asked.  “I watched the wedding from the boy’s bedroom window, and I didn’t noticed anything strange.”

 

“Oh no?  Didn’t you notice the two mysterious women at the wedding, Brian?  They were both so inappropriately dress for a wedding, so they stood out like sore thumbs.   Also, I noticed Clay left the wedding momentarily.  He exited the backyard and went to the front with another man, but returned by himself, and by the way, that man wasn’t dressed for the wedding either.  I wonder what all that was about.”

 

“Yeah.  Now that you mentioned it I did notice them; and both of the women spoke briefly with Justin and then left abruptly.  That is kind of strange.  Did you get close enough to hear their conversations?”

 

“No.  I have no idea whom they were, or what they said to Justin.  However, I do think it was quite strange because to my knowledge those two women did not mingle with anyone else at the wedding, they only spoke with Justin, and they both left as swiftly as they had arrived.”

 

“That is weird,” Brian had to admit.  “Hmm,” he then seemed to get buried in his thoughts.

 

“Now what got you thinking so hard?”  Michael attempted to pick at Brian’s brain.

 

“Something Justin’s grandmother had said to me earlier today.”

 

“Huh?  You and her spoke today?”  Michael asked.

 

Brian simply nodded.

 

“What did she have to say?”   Michael then asked.

 

“She said she might suspect the doc married Justin for his money?  What do you think?”

 

“Hmm.  I guess anything’s possible, Brian.  However, the doctor – at least – appears to have a helluva lot of money of his own.  According to Justin he owns real estate all over Europe, including several properties here in Paris.  He also owns a place in Brussels, which I understand is his primary residence.  Seems  the doc's quite loaded, Brian, if you ask me.”

 

“Hmm.  I guess we’d have to see then,” Brian mumbled to himself.

 

“So, still you haven’t answered my question, Brian.  What if things aren’t all right?”

 

Brian smirked devilishly in response.  “Then you do what you do best, Michael,” he curtly stated.

 

“Huh?  What’s that?”

 

“You work that conniving and evil magic of yours, and YOU SEND MY HUSBAND AND SON BACK HOME TO ME!  And, I think just maybe then I can forgive you.  Do you get me, Mike Novot?”

 

“What?  Huh?”  Michael slightly laughed, at first thinking Brian was toying with him, but then he could see that Brian wasn’t laughing at all.  “You are quite serious – aren’t you?  Looks like someone’s bounce back, and his backbone has returned to him after all.  That was a pretty damn immediate switch, Brian.”

 

Brian nodded.

 

“Yeah, Bri.  I got you.  You really do want your husband and son back; and I was just thinking of something.”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“There might be no entities better than a couple of your subsidiaries, like Kinnetic Publishing, and Kinney Advertising, that would be best to publish and market Justin and mine comic book.  I suppose you know where I’m getting at with that statement?”

 

“What?  Have you become totally dense?  Justin won’t go for any companies I own getting involved in your venture, Michael?”

 

“Oh really?   Recall, he had no problem posing and giving interviews for your magazine Contemporary Artist Debut?  It was you, Brian, who reared Justin’s good business sense remember?  You taught him that business is business, and a deal is a deal, and always seek out the very best.  Just like you, he absolutely swears by that philosophy.  He’ll have no problem with Kinnetic Publishing launching our comic book, especially if he stills believes you are quadriplegic, and therefore aren’t likely to give him any shit.”

 

“Oh, yeah right.  See, Michael, that deviant mind of yours put the wheels spinning in motion already.”

 

“I’ll do anything, Brian, to set the score right with you.”

 

“That’s very nice to know.  Maybe we should celebrate then.”

 

“Oh?”

 

“Oh, yes.  I feel like getting stinky high and do some fucking.”

 

Michael’s eyes popped wide just then.

 

“Don’t get any ideas, Mike Novot!  You and I will never happen like that again.  I meant some anonymous fucking,” Brian’s brow arched.  “That’s the reason I told the driver to take us to a club.  I know about this place because Justin and I went there during our first honeymoon.  The men were really hot there but because I was committed to Justin at the time, I couldn’t take advantage of that situation.” 

 

Brian then chuckled about a particular memory.

 

“What’s so funny?” Michael asked.

 

“Would you believe Justin looked so much like a twink back then, the bartender refused to serve him, and Justin couldn’t prove his age, because he accidentally left his I.D. back at our hotel.  So, I actually ended up buying all the drinks and had to sneak his over to him.”

 

“That is funny,” Michael laughed at Brian’s story.  “You must have a lot of great memories about the things Justin and you’ve done together.”

 

“Loads of them, Mikey.  You wouldn’t believe some of things Justin and I experienced together, and especially while on our honeymoons.” 

 

Just then Brian recollected on the incident that occurred during their second honeymoon, when thugs chased Justin and him in Jamaica, and how frightened he was for Justin that night, and he hoped there would never be another occasion where he would have reason to be that afraid again for Justin (and/or anyone else he loves), like he was that night.

 

“Hey, we are here,” Brian announced when the cab stopped in front of the club.  He then paid the driver, and Michael and he got out of the cab and went inside the gay establishment.

 

“Brian,” Michael struck conversation as Brian and he were making their way to the bar.

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Do you still keep in touch with Ben Bruckner?   How’s he doing?”

 

“Hmm?  Where did that question come from, Michael?  Are you missing Ben Bruckner for some reason?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Oh, I see.”  Brian said as Michael and he arrived at the bar, and Brian felt Michael needn’t say anything more about the matter.  “A couple of your best Vodka,” Brian then ordered drinks for both of them, and then resumed the conversation with Michael where they had left off.   “I don’t keep in touch with Ben directly, Michael… but Ted does.  He’s keeps me updated on how Ben’s doing though.  He told me that the HIV has not escalates into AIDS, and according to Ben’s doctors it is very unlikely to, so he’s doing just fine.”

 

“He is?”  Michael asked, as the bartender set the drinks down in front of the two men.  “Do you know if he has someone new in his life?”

 

“I really wouldn’t know.  I never asked Ted about that nor did he volunteer any information about Ben’s love life.  If you want, I can ask him about it next time we talk.  I gather you ask because you had fallen in love with Ben, Michael?  Do you still have strong feelings for him?”

 

“Yeah, but I was so wrapped up in my obsession of you at the time, I didn’t realize it then.  So, I just ended up hurting him – pretty much in the same capacity like you hurt Justin.  I left him without any explanation, or saying goodbye, and never turned back.”

 

Brian simply nodded but didn’t comment any further.

 

“Well, what do we drink to?”  Michael asked when Brian and he simultaneously lifted their drinks from the counter.

 

“I’m not sure what we should drink to, Michael,” Brian curtly stated.

 

“Brian?”

 

“Yeah?’

 

“Umm…,” Michael became tongue-tied and hesitant.

 

“What is it, Mike Novot?”

 

“I meant it earlier when I said I’ll do anything to gain your forgiveness, but…”

 

“But what?”

 

“I have some reservations about the things you’ve asked me to do for you… that is sneak Gus away to see you, and spy on Justin and his husband.  Brian, I’ve hurt both Justin and you so much already, and it was really big of Justin to forgive me like he did.   So, I don’t want to do anything that might betray his trust and cause him any additional pain.”

 

“I’m not asking you to.  It’s just the contrary actually.  As long as everything is hunky-dory with that marriage, you don’t have to do another thing, and if things aren’t so swell, you’ll be doing everyone a favor.  So, what’s the problem?  Get your head out of your ass, Mike Novot, will you?”

 

“Sure, Brian.  Sorry…”

 

“Sorry’s bullshit, Mike.”

 

“Yeah, it is, Brian.  Sorry is bullshit… it most definitely is.”

 

"There," Brian said tapping his glass against Michael's.

 

"Huh?"

 

"Let's drink to my pilot flying us both to Germany tomorrow... done deal, Michael, or what?"

 

"Done deal, Brian."

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