Chapter 133:  Justin, Please!

            “Justin, please.”

“Jensen, will you just leave.  We are in a public place and everyone’s staring.  You’re making a spectacle out of yourself and you are embarrassing me.  Will you just have some pride, save us both some face, and get out of here?”

“Not until you say yes.”

“Jensen.  Leave,” Justin started whispering then because people actually were watching and listening.  “I’m not going to agree to marry you just because you beg me to; and how can you beg another person to marry you anyway?  Jensen, how pathetic is that?  That shows you really have some serious issues.  Maybe you should consider seeing someone professionally about your problems.  You might need help, Jensen.”

“You can help me.”

“That’s not what I meant.  Jensen, you’re confused.  But that’s okay; it happens to the best of us.  If you like I can give you the name and number of the therapist I use for time to time.  She’s really good.  She worked wonders helping me cope when Brian first left me.”

“Are you calling me crazy, Justin?”

“No,” Justin shook his head.  “No, not at all, Jensen.  I’m just suggesting that maybe you need to talk to a professional.  Although I don’t see my therapist on a routine basis like I did at first, even now I drop her a line every once in a while.   So Jensen, there’s no shame in talking out your problems with a psychiatrist.  My doctor’s back in Seattle but I’m sure if I gave you the number and you called her she could recommend someone out here for you.”

“Stop it, Justin.  I only have one problem and I don’t need a doctor to solve it for me.  You can very well do that by just simply reinstating our engagement and agreeing to marry me Monday.”

“Jensen, will just take a moment and listen to yourself.  Trying to pressure another person into marrying you is absurd.   My answer is still NO; and that is not going to change.  So will you just take the therapist’s number and go?  Please, Jensen?  I’m so sorry but it’s over and I’d like to think of our breakup as an amiable one.  I don’t hate you any, Jensen, and I rather us part on good terms and just consider us incompatible for each other.”

“But we are compatible, Justin, but most of all I love you.  You must know that and if you give us another chance, I swear I’ll make everything up to you and I’ll be the best husband ever; and I remedy any flaws you see in me.  Justin, please say yes or I would have failed, and you know how much I hate to fail.”

“Is that what this is mostly about?”

“Huh?”

“I think you are more concerned about failing than you are in love with me.”

“Justin, I really love you but still I don’t want to fail.  I mean who wants to fail at a relationship or anything else?  So Justin, please say our marriage is back on for Monday?”

” I can’t say yes, Jensen, because I don’t love you, and I don’t want to be married to you; and at this junction, you’re no longer asking, Jensen - you’re begging and that’s not normal.  You should be able to accept me saying no to you and just walk away.  Also, Jensen, you need to find constructive ways of dealing with this morbid fear of failure that you have.  Jensen, to fail is a normal thing.  We all fail and win at something in life.  That’s just simply how life is.  However, not everyone responds to failure the way that you do.  You don’t have a productive and healthy way of dealing with it.  Jensen, you should take my doctor’s number.  You have some serious issues that you really need to work out, and you need to move on.”

“You mean like you did where Brian’s concerned, Justin?”

“Exactly.”

“No.  You haven’t moved on, Justin.”

“What are you talking about?  I’ve definitely move on, Jensen.  I got involved with you.  And, the only reason it didn’t work out is because you ruined what we had - I didn’t.”

“Really, Justin?  You don’t think you ruined things for both of us when you kept calling out Brian’s name in bed when I was fucking you last night?”

“What?  What are you talking about?”

“Hmm.  You so over him that you didn’t even realize that you called out his name when I was inside you last night.   Analyze how pathetic that is, Justin?”

“Really Jensen?  I don’t believe I called his name out, but even if it’s true that I subconsciously called out Brian’s name while you fucked me, what does that say about you?   What person would want to marry someone who calls out someone else’s name when he puts his dick inside him?”

“Why are you being so cruel to me, Justin?”

“I don’t mean to be, Jensen, but I’m keep telling you NO, but you just won’t leave me alone.  Technically, at this point you are actually stalking me.”

“That’s because I love you and I want you to marry me.”

“I don’t think love has anything to do with it.  I think at this moment you only want to marry me because you don’t want to tell your parents that you failed.”

“Of course I don’t want to tell them that I failed.  What son wants to tell his parents that he failed?  But I still love you though.”

Justin shook his had at Jensen; and at that moment he was so fed up that all he wanted was to get away from his ex-fiancé.  So, he tried a new approach of being extra gentle in his handling of the situation.

 “Jensen,” Justin lowered his voice to a much softer whisper and calmly suggested,  “Will you just stay here and marvel over my paintings or something while I go over there and talk some business with Mariah.  Just hang out here at my wall for a few moments.  I’ll be right back.  I won’t be long.” 

Justin then walked away from Jensen and went over to Mariah who was quite a distance across the room aiding another artist with his presentation; and when things were a little loud between Justin and Jensen she heard parts of their quarrel.  “Is there any security around here?”  He whispered to her.

“You know, Justin, since most buyers use their checkbooks or plastic to make their purchases very little cash exchanges hands in this shop.  So rarely is there enough cash around here for us to feel a big concern to protect it; and we never had a robbery or any violent incident before.  So, we always avoided incurring the expensive of hiring a security guard.”

“Had you noticed his behavior, Mariah?”

Mariah nodded.

“So then, how do you suggest I get Jensen off my back?”

“Call 9-1-1, I guess.”

“I really don’t want to do that to him.”

“Well, would you like me to call?  It looks like he’s really off his rocker, Justin.  I’m becoming concerned for you.  Are you sure you’re not taking this thing too lightly?  I don’t mean to frightened you but you were engaged to him and crimes of passion, Justin, can be the most dramatic or violent of all.”

“Shit.  I’m not that frightened of him, Mariah.  Not out in public anyway; and I don’t want to hurt your gallery’s reputation.  So, I tell you what - for everyone’s sake maybe I should just leave.”

“Are you the crazy one now?  You leave here he might follow you and hurt you somewhere out there.  Justin, I really think you should agree to get the police involved.”

“No.  No police, Mariah.  I’ll just leave.”

Justin then hurried to the door.

“Justin, where are you going?”  Jensen shouted.

Justin was done trying to reason with Jensen though.  So, he didn’t say another word or bother to look back.  Instead he scurried out of the door really fast; so fast that he bumped a passerby on the sidewalk and that slowed him down immensely.  In fact, it looked like Justin and the man he ran into might fall to the ground; and Jensen was approaching trotting fast. 

“Fuck, damn it!”  The passerby, a Puerto Rican man, bitched as he grabbed Justin by the bicep and that gentleman was so strong he was able to balance and straighten them both up and prevent their fall.  “Why don’t you watch where the f…,” the Hispanic man started to curse Justin out but then he paused when he recognized the artist’s face.   However in Justin’s haste to get quickly away from Jensen he didn’t recognize the man’s face right away.  “Sorry, but let me go.  I’m in a rush.”

Justin tried to wriggle himself away from the man’s firm grip.

“But hey, Justin!”  The man held him innocuously captive and cordially greeted him then.  “Don’t you remember me - Alex - Robert’s roommate?”

“Oh yeah, Alex.  How are you doing?”

“Why in such a hurry?”  Alex asked but before Justin could answer Jensen caught up and got the door open and rushed up to the two men conversing on the sidewalk.  Alex then let go of Justin’s biceps.

“Jensen, will you finally give me a break and just go, please,” Justin tried to reason with him once more.   “I said no; and I meant it.  Leave me alone, damn it!” 

“I can’t leave you alone,” Jensen piteously moaned.

“Hey!  Justin, are you all right!  Is this guy harassing you are something?  Is he the reason you ran out of the gallery like that?”  Alex voice’s boomed with authority and his mannerism came across as totally serious and immensely protective and he had a brawny enough physique to back up his aggression.  “Hey back off,” he commanded as he stepped between Justin and Jensen.  “Justin told you to leave… so leave.  What’s your damn problem?   Back the fuck off or I’ll knock your ass the fuck off!  Get going, bastard!  Motherfucker!”

“Umm,” Jensen held his arms up defenselessly.  “This is really none of your business,” he said as he tried to brush Alex away, and that was regardless that the Hispanic man’s size and demeanor had instantly intimidated him.  Had he been a much smaller man though Alex might have stood up to him as well as swung a couple of racist slurs the Hispanic man’s way.

“Man, I’m warning you - back the fuck off,” Alex continuously threatened.

“But, this is between Justin… I mean my fiancé and me…” Jensen apprehensively whimpered.

“I’m not your fiancé, Jensen.  Never really was.  Oh that reminds me.”  Justin dug into his pocket pulled out the engagement band and presented it to Jensen.  “I was going to come around later tonight to your place and give you this back but obviously you saved me a trip.”

“I’m not taking it,” Jensen refused to touch it.  “It’s yours.”

“I’m giving it back.  I don’t want it.  Now take it, Jensen.”

“No.”

“Fine then,” Justin asserted and then he dropped the ring to the ground.  “I don’t want it, Jensen.  It doesn’t belong to me… never really did.  I don’t love you, and I won’t marry you no matter how much you beg me.  It just isn’t going to happen.  So, you just going to have to tell mommy and daddy that you failed after all.  Go, Jensen.”

“Justin, do you need me to stick around?”  Alex offered and then he got back on Jensen. "You heard Justin.  Now go.  Leave, Jensen,” Alex commanded.  “You heard the man.  Have some dignity and pride, damn it, won’t you, and just go.  Don’t you notice everyone who walks pass here looks over at you like you’re some kind of fool?  Go man!  Save yourself some dignity… you actually behaving like a sick weasel?”

“Okay, I’m leaving,” Jensen finally gave up but not before he pleaded with Justin one last time.  “But Justin,” he piteously beseeched as tears swore up in the corners of his eyes.  “I want you to know that I just can’t survive if I have to live a life of failure.  So, I’m begging you just one more time.  Please, Justin?  It’s a matter of life and death now.  You will literally be saving my life, if you would just say ‘yes’.  Please, please, please?  Marry me and save my life, Justin?”

“Maybe I don’t want to save your life, Jensen,” Justin callously scoffed.  “So, just go.  FINALLY - will you!  GO!”

“Yeah!  Take a hike, man!  Go!”  Alex echoed Justin’s request.

“Bye, Justin.  Love you,” Jensen pronounced and then he finally turned away from Justin and walked away in despair; and in an effort not to encourage him in any way, Justin refused look after him.

“Good grief, Justin,” Alex sighed relief.  “What was that all about?  Was that maniac really your fiancé?”

“Embarrassingly so.”

“Embarrassingly so?  Looked more like dangerously so, you ask me.”

“Yeah, you wouldn’t believe how dangerous,” Justin remarked as he thought back on how Jensen almost raped him the night before.

“Hmm,” Alex mumbled and nodded his head, as he wondered how concerned should he be for the artist’s safety.  “Are you going to be alright getting home tonight after the gallery closes?”  He worrisomely asked.

“I’m fairly sure I’ll be alright.  I think just the fact that you were able to make him walk away is a good sign that some of his good senses might have returned to him.”

“Are you sure?   You just said that guy was dangerous.”

“That was really just a figure of speech.  Jensen’s not crazy just really persistent.  He’s really ambitious and he doesn’t take failure too well.  I really will be alright though.”

“Well, umm… I want you to know that I got the full day off work today, but even when I do work… myself, Robert and our other roommate (all three of us) are home from work before this place closes, so for added protection, we can come around at closing time and see you safely back to you place tonight, if you like?” 

“Thanks.  That’s too kind of you, but I don’t feel that I really need it, nor would I want to inconvenience anyone like that.”

“No inconvenience at all, if it would keep you safe.”

“I’ll be alright,” Justin chuckled as the tension inside him was easing up a bit and his normal level of relaxation was returning to him.   “I’m sure I’ll be quite safe inside a cab.”

“Okay… sure.”  Alex smiled and nodded and left it at that, but already he made up his mind that he and his other two roommates were accompanying Justin home that night whether the artist was okay with it or not.

“Umm, what are you going to do about that ring your dropped on the ground?”  Alex then asked.

“I don’t want it,” Justin said.

Alex laughed.  “Man, you do know gold is just about 2000 dollars an ounce these days? That’s a small fortune you dropped down on the ground there.”

“Really?  Then why does it seem absolutely worthless to me.”  Justin then said, “Alex, thanks a lot for what you just did for me.”  He then hugged Alex and he embraced the artist back.

“You’re welcome, Justin.  Take care and stay safe.  And, if you need me, I’m right here next door.  You know where to find me… apartment 2B.”

“Thanks,” Justin chuckled.

“You’re welcome.  Now go back in there and finish your day’s work.  I’ll see you later, Mr. Taylor.”

“And what’s your last name?” Justin asked.

“Vasquez,” Alex answered. 

“Well later, Mr. Vasquez, and thanks again.”

“You’re welcome again.  Bye.”

Justin then went back inside the art gallery and Alex then picked up the ring off the ground and hurried inside his building with it.

Later that evening when the gallery was just closing Alex had Robert with him then and they both met Justin coming out of the gallery.  However, their other roommate wasn’t with them simply because he really didn’t care to come. 

“Hi there, Justin,” Robert greeted his client’s ex-husband.

“Hey, hi Robert again.  How’s everything… and how’s… you know… Brian… and his cousins too?”

Robert chuckled.  “I’m good, Justin, and so are Brian and his cousins.  How about you?  Alex told me that Jensen went berserk on you this morning and you offered his ring back to him.”

“Hi again, Alex, and takes a lot for helping me out like that.”

“No problem.  Any time man, but I have to say,” Alex chortled.

“Huh?  Say what?”  Justin asked.

“Too bad your fiancé was such an overbearing needy bastard because the guy was certainly HOT.”

“Yeah, he was a pretty boy,” Justin agreed.  “But I learned my lesson not to let a pretty face and body fool me ever again.  I mean when it came right down to it, that’s pretty much all that Jensen was - just another pretty face.”

“Well, are you walking distance from here?” Alex then asked.

“Yeah, I’m staying at the Marriott; it’s about half a dozen blocks from here… give or take a few.  But I can take a cab.”

“But that’s such a short walk - and it’s really a nice night out - Alex and I will walk you,” Robert nearly insisted and the three men started that instant walking in the direction heading towards the Marriott.

“Umm, Robert,” Justin started to ask but the therapist had already read the artist’s mind.

“I know exactly what you were going to request:  Please, don’t tell Brian about any of this,” Robert mocked.

“I REALLY rather you not tell him, Robert,” Justin humbly requested.

“Then I won’t,” Robert sighed as he vowed.  “The two of you are forever recruiting me to keep your secrets; but I can’t figure out either of you.  You men have to be two of the most stubborn males I’ve ever met.  But, just maybe if the two of you would learn to stop keeping secrets from each other all the time, you might eventually make it onto the same page for once.  Justin, I think Brian would really want to know about the breakup.  He’s still in love with you, just in case you didn’t realize.   I think you should let me tell him about the breakup.”

“Hey, what’s going on?”  Alex interrupted.  “Who’s Brian?  Were you, this Brian guy, and that Jensen guy all inside a triangle together or something?”

“Never mind, Alex,” Robert answered in lieu of the artist.  “Justin’s a pretty private person.”

“Oh,” Alex just backed off then.

”But, Justin, I have to ask,” Robert inquired, “How does it benefit anyone if Brian continues to believe Jensen and you are still a couple?  What’s your reason for forbidding me from telling him about the breakup?”

“Robert, I don’t think Brian deserves to know… not yet anyway.  He really hurt me, Robert, doing what he did to me.”

“Oh, sweet revenge then,” Robert shook his head, “Payback time… huh?  But I know from experience that that never really benefits anyone, Justin.”

“It has nothing to do with revenge, Robert,” Justin firmly emphasized.  “It just that I meant it when I said I don’t want Brian making me crazy again.  So, I’m being more cautious than anything else.  I need some time to sort some things out.”

“This guy Brian is not another stalker… is he?”   Alex was more curious than ever then.

“No he’s not, Alex; but enough about that topic for now, but the weather CERTAINLY IS nice tonight,” Robert said and that anchored the overall mood during the rest of the duration of the three men’s stroll, and it was light conversation and even some laughter all the rest of way to Justin’s hotel.

“Here you are, Justin,” Robert said when they arrived on the sidewalk in front of Justin’s hotel.  “Alex and I got you safely here and hope you stay that way.  Watch your back though.”

“Thanks, it was a really nice stroll with some really good company - well worth the effort,” Justin extended his gratitude to both men and they exchanged handshakes with him.

“Hey man,” Alex started bashfully asking Justin something.

“Yeah?”

“I picked that ring up but are you sure you don’t want it back?”

“I don’t.  Feel free to keep it, Alex, if you want it.”

“Yeah, that’s what he was hoping you would say, Justin,” Robert lightly criticized his buddy.

“Hey, so what?”  Alex was good-humouredly offended.  “If he doesn’t want it and that guy who gave it to him won’t taken it back, it’s fair gain… don’t you think?”

“Sure it is, Alex, and never mind Robert,” Justin told him.  “I’ve barely known him half a week and already I know what a kidder he is.  You are his roommie - I would think you’d know that about him better than I do.”

“Yeah, he’s right, Robert.  You can be a real stick in the mud at times.”

“Really, Alex?  I doubt if you even know exactly what that phrase mean.”

“Ha-ha-ha,” Alex sarcastically remarked because he really wasn’t completely sure of its meaning.

“Good night, Justin.  Go on inside your hotel,” Robert ordered him.  “Oh, but by the way, how long is your engagement with the gallery?  According to what I’ve read you’re only there for the next two days?  Is that true?  I mean if so, Alex and I can walk you home each night until you’re finish there.”

“But…” Justin started to protest and let the men off the hook but Robert wasn’t taking NO from the man that his favorite client Brian loves.

“Justin, it was just a short walk and you were great company.  It’s Alex and my pleasure.  Right Alex?”

“Fuck yeah.”  Alex, like Robert, really flattered as well as lifted Justin’s spirits just then.

“Thanks guy.  Okay - I’m all right with it.  And, to answer your question Robert:  You are right - I’m just here until Friday.   Then I’m leaving New York altogether, actually.”

“Oh, yeah.  Where are you going from here… home, I guess?”  Alex asked.  “Where do you live?”

“In Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania,” Justin answered Alex and then he said to both men.  “But I’m not really going home from here.  Well, I’m going home for a little while.  However, only long enough to get packed and then I’m taking off to Europe.  I’m taking my art on tour of that continent.  I should be gone for a year.”

A year, Robert thought silently to himself.  Brian will DEFINITELY be walking by the time Justin returns from his tour.

“Shit!” Alex exclaimed.  “That sounds really exciting.”

“I surely hope it will be,” Justin responded.

“First trip to Europe?” Alex then asked.

“No.  I’ve been there before.  My parents took my sister and me to London once when we were kids.”  However, Justin didn’t care to mention the time Brian and he honeymooned in Paris (that first time they were married).

“Well, I hope it’ll be a nice, safe and fun trip,” Robert wished the artist.

“Thanks, guys.”

“You’re welcome,” they chorused.

“Well, goodnight, Robert and Alex; and thanks again for the safe escort over here.”

Justin then went safely inside the Marriott ™ and Robert and Alex turned back around and walked swiftly home.