Midnight Whispers
QAF Brian and Justin Fanfiction

Justin  

He would not allow them to perform an autopsy on Ethan.  That's the least he could do for his boyfriend of almost three years; leave him with some dignity intact.  Besides, the doctors already knew what had killed the young man, so Justin deemed the entire procedure barbaric and unnecessary.    

The idea of Ethan being dissected and probed repulsed the blond.  His "no" to the doctor had been emphatic and final.  It was perhaps the last time he showed any semblance of a strong, emotional reaction.   

Overwhelmed by his grief, as well as physically and mentally exhausted, Justin was merely functioning on auto pilot now.  Ethan was gone.  It hadn't seemed real to him until he saw the shell of what once was his boyfriend with his own two eyes.   

He had to come to terms with the fact that he would never again feel the dark haired prodigy's lips on his, or experience a private performance of the violinist's magnificent rendition of Paganini's Cantabile.  Although his heart was heavy with sadness and pain over the loss, he was unable to shed any more tears.      

Brian  

He waltzed into the diner looking every inch like an Armani model, spontaneously causing every head to turn his way.  He knew they were all watching him.  They wanted to get close to him, touch him, smell him, know him.   

Fuck 'em.  They would never get their chance.   

All it took was for him to crash and burn once.  For Brian had always been a quick learner.  He had foolishly opened up and let someone inside, taking a huge chance.  He would never do that again, because the walls were up for good.  No one would ever invade his heart and soul the way Justin Taylor had.   

His arrival at the usual table interrupted an intense conversation between Michael, Ted and Emmett.  His friends became unnaturally silent as he slid into the booth.  

"What the fuck's going on?  I know I look extremely alluring this morning, but that shouldn't surprise any of you. "  

More silence.  

"Cat got your tongue?" he directed at Emmett, who couldn't keep a secret to save his life.  

"Hate to burst your bubble, but we weren't talking about you," Emmett retorted flippantly.  "Not all things revolve around the great God Kinney."  

"Spill," Brian demanded.  

"Justin's coming home tomorrow," Michael announced.  

"Oh...and I should be interested because?"  

"He's been through a terrible trauma," Ted replied.  "You have a history together.  I'd think you'd want to be there for him, if nothing else as a concerned friend."  

"I'm quite sure Paganini Jr. will help him heal just fine."

Emmett and Michael threw knowing looks at each other.  

"What?" Brian inquired suspiciously.  He was beginning to get irritated.  What the fuck did they all know that he didn't?  

"Uh...that's just it," Michael spoke up hesitantly.  "Ethan died from his injuries.  Justin's bringing the body back home.  He wants to have a service for him."  

Now it was Brian's turn to be quiet.  He didn't know what to say.  Everyone knew there had been a lot of resentment between the two of them.  But that certainly didn't mean he had wanted the young musician to die.   

After an awkward stretch of silence he grumbled, "Sorry to hear that, but there's nothing I can do to help him."   

Then Brian began to rise to his feet and abruptly stated, "If you'll excuse me boys, unlike the rest of you, I have a business to run, make that two."  Referring to his recent purchase of Babylon.  

His hasty retreat left them with their mouths hanging open.  

Once outside, Brian leaned his back against his car and pulled out a cigarette.  He badly needed a smoke.  He had some trouble lighting the darn thing because he noticed that his hands were trembling.  Shit!      

Justin  

Thank God he was able to convince his mother not to fly out to France to be with him.  He was not in the mood for any questions or well meaning expressions of sympathy from the woman who bore him.   

Truth of it was that he wanted to be the only one to accompany Ethan home.  Ethan was his responsibility and his alone.   

Christ, he had barely made it through the conversation with his mother a little while ago.  Justin rocked back and forth, his arms wrapped around his body.  He couldn't manage to sleep.  Poor, unfortunate Ethan was on his mind.      

Justin grasped the covers off the bed and huddled on the floor of the hotel room, his weary eyes stared out into the dark.  He was grateful that someone who heard about the plane crash had generously offered accommodations for the victims, as well as their families, otherwise he'd probably be wandering the streets in a daze.   

In some ways, Justin felt like a part of him had died with Ethan.  He didn't want to bring Ethan home in a casket.  He didn't want to deal with his family and friends' questions.   

Without a doubt, Justin knew that he was to blame for Ethan's death.  He didn't know how he was going to continue living with that knowledge.  It wasn't fair that the young man was dead.  It wasn't fair that he would not be able to share his tremendous talent with the world.   

Justin rubbed his hand over his eyes.  He had to pull himself together and make funeral arrangements for his twenty-four year old lover.  He had to handle all of this on his own.   

He could feel the darkness all around him.  It was closing in on him fast.       

Jennifer  

As a mother, she wanted to ignore her son's wishes and board a jet to France.  But then, after she heard the adamant tone in her son's voice, she knew she couldn't do that.   

However, the very next day, her motherly instincts got the best of her.  She dropped Molly off at Craig's house and drove straight to the airport to meet Justin's plane.  

What would happen when Justin saw her?  Would he be happy or pissed that she had gone against his wishes?  

Jennifer bit her lip nervously as she waited for Justin's plane to unload it's passengers.  At last, they began to trickle out.  She spotted him emerging from the security checkpoint and became alarmed immediately. 

He was wearing dark sunglasses, his usually tame blond locks in disarray.  He advanced stiffly as if he were in pain.  Then she remembered that he had told her about the various cuts and bruises he had sustained form the accident, so she could only conclude it was the cause of his slow, hesitant gait.  

Justin did a double take when he noticed his mother waving, but then drifted over to where she was standing.  

"Mom, what are you doing here?"  

"Oh honey, I'm sorry.  I had to come."   

Jennifer couldn't contain her need to cast her arms about him and hold him close.  At first, he went rigid in her embrace.  But then, she felt him sigh, and soon his entire body relaxed into her.  After a few moments, he completely surrendered and lifted his arms to return the hug.  

She accompanied him to an office in the airport, where he had to complete some paperwork to claim the casket with Ethan's remains.  Even though Jennifer understood that her son had been through a horrific ordeal, she could tell that something was going on with Justin.   

It was only natural for him to grieve of course, but she sensed something else.  She regarded his detached manner and awkward actions.   It disturbed her.   

Justin was the same, yet different.  Her keen intuition was making her begin to worry.      

 

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