Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter One

Watching the street lights go past in a blur with an unexplainable feeling of dread in his gut, Brian Kinney sat in his limo on the way to the airport. His thoughts were drifting over what was waiting for him in Australia. At least his flight was on time according to his driver, which was a good thing.

His life was just a bit empty. He had never really realised just how big a part of his life Justin and Michael were and now he had neither. Double fuck. His life was more than a bit empty now that he gave it some serious thought.

Not really listening to the radio, Brian only caught a few scattered words.

“…explosion…Babylon…fatalities…”

Fuck. He had let them use the club for that fundraiser to stop Prop 14. Justin was there. Michael was there.

“Turn around,” Brian instructed his driver while pulling out his cell phone. His heart beating faster as fear began to take hold of him.

Repeatedly dialling and repeatedly getting no answer, Brian began to panic. He then did something he hadn’t done in years. He began to pray without even realising it.

“Please, not him. Please let him be alright,” was continuously muttered under his breath. Brian didn’t even notice that he was doing it.

Arriving outside Babylon, Brian stood and stared for a couple of seconds in frozen disbelief at the ruins that once used to be Babylon and the utter chaos that surrounded him. A blonde caught his attention. It was the wrong blonde, not the one he was looking for but was preferable to nothing.

“Jennifer, Jennifer,” Brian shouted as he ran towards her. Jennifer was standing with Tucker wrapped in blankets and covered in soot.

“Jennifer,” the brunette breathed as he came to a stop before her.

“Brian, I can’t believe it,” the blonde woman replied shakily, her face extremely pale underneath all the grime and soot.

“Are you alright?”

“I’m fine. Justin’s still in there. You gotta find him.” The words had barely left her lips before Brian was running straight into the smokey ruins of Babylon pushing his way past several people in order to get inside. Choking on the smoke, Brian frantically searched for Justin. The alarms and sirens were blaring loudly all around him. Fire fighters and paramedics were helping people all around him and yet he didn’t see the blonde head he was searching for..

“We need you to leave the building. Everyone who is able, please exit as quickly as possible,” a voice stated calmly and loudly from somewhere behind Brian.

“JUSTIN”

Brian coughed and choked on some more smoke. He could barely see where he was going.

All around him people were crying and wailing.

“JUSTIN”

Looking to his right, Brian recognised the figure limping towards him unsteadily and reached out with both hands to grab him.

“Ted”

He moved his hands from Ted’s shoulders and instead grabbed Ted by the front of his shirt.

“Ted. What the fuck happened?”

“I don’t know,” came the bewildered reply from a soot covered Ted that was holding onto his date for the evening.

“Have you seen Justin?”

No reply was forthcoming. All Ted did was shake his head helplessly. Brian turned covering his mouth with his hand while he continued desperately searching around him for the younger man. HE couldn’t lose Justin. Not now. Not after everything. Not after he had finally gotten his much needed wake up call.

“He’s not breathing, somebody help me,” someone shouted to the left of him causing Brian to panic further.

The tall brunette slowly started making his way further into Babylon’s ruins through all the rubble and hanging electrical wires. Glancing to his right Brian froze. There on the ground amongst the rubble was a shoe that used to be a black high heel. It was covered and surrounded by blood. The shoe minus an owner and covered in blood really drove home the fact that some people were not getting out of there alive for Brian. Some people were never going to see their partners again. He could not be counted amongst them. He just couldn’t.

To his left, a fire fighter was covering a body with a blanket. Above him another fire fighter was checking for a pulse on the body half hanging over the railing. Brian once again covered his mouth with his hands and struggled to simply breathe through the soot and panic.

Emmett came stumbling towards him from around a corner.

“You guys are okay. That’s good, I was worried,” he murmured to Brian and Ted as Ted came up behind Brian, relief oozing from him.

“Emmett, have you seen Justin?” Brian’s voice was becoming more and more panicked each time he asked someone and received a negative reply.

Emmett’s already pale face paled even further. He had seen everybody but Justin.

“Michael and Ben, Melanie and Lindsay and everybody else are outside.”

“I didn’t ask about everyone else. I asked if you had seen Justin, Emmett,” Brian spoke harshly, his fear clearly evident for all to see.

“I haven’t seen Justin at all. He was standing somewhere over there before…before…” Emmett’s voice faded out. Brian was already charging towards where Emmett had shakily pointed.

”JUSTIN”

“JUSTIN”

A partial blonde head laying on the floor under a ton of rubble caught Brian’s attention when the electrical cords sparked again.

“JUSTIN. Oh God. No, no, no, no,” was pleaded as Brian made his way towards the too still form lying on the ground half covered by rubble.

Tearing at the rubble until there was nothing left lying on Justin anymore, Brian’s only thought was that Justin had to be alive. He had finally realised how much Justin meant to him. He couldn’t loose him now. His breath was coming out in chocked, broken sobs. Shakily, Brian knelt next to Justin, desperately searching for a pulse, any sign of life. A horrifying feeling of déjà vu settled over him. This could not be happening. Not again.

The first thing that caught his attention was the large, deep red stain on Justin’s side and the ever growing pool of blood that he was now kneeling in. The blood soaking into his pants, leaving behind an irremovable stain. The second thing Brian noticed was the slight uneven rise and fall of Justin’s chest. Releasing a breath he hadn’t realised he was holding, Brian savoured one thought.

He is still alive

“Help, somebody help,” Brian shouted as loud as he possibly could.

The blood was too much; it was escaping Justin’s body too fast. Brian knew that. He barely knew anything to do with first aid and felt utterly useless.

A few seconds later two guys in paramedic uniforms came running from somewhere behind him. They immediately started working on Justin while Brian sat watching their quick and efficient movements, helpless to do anything. The paramedics managed to get Justin on a stretcher and slowly carried him out to the ambulance. Brian was behind them every step of the way until he got outside.

The family immediately swarmed around Brian, coming from all directions and cutting him off from Justin.

“Brian, what are you doing here?”

“Brian, are you hurt?”

“Brian, did you find Justin?”

The only one not by him was Jennifer and Tucker.

“Justin, oh my baby,” came Jennifer’s voice, a plea for all of this to just be a nightmare and to be able to wake up now.

Tucker put his arms around her and held her. Brian completely ignored everyone and their questions and pushed past them to continue following the paramedics to the ambulance.

Before anyone could argue or say a word, Brian stated in a voice that said any person disagreeing would be severely dealt with, “I’m his partner. I’m coming with him.”

The paramedic with the long black hair took one look to the brunet with the don’t-fuck-with-me expression on his face and devastated hazel eyes and barked out, “Get in”

Without a glance back, Brian once again got in an ambulance behind Justin.

Tucker turned to Jennifer and gave her shoulders a comforting squeeze.

“Come on, Jen. I’ll drive you to the hospital okay?”

Jennifer just nodded and watched the ambulance pull away. Inside the ambulance, Brian sat and watched Justin’s chest rise and fall with each breathe while the paramedics worked on him. Knowing that each breath might be Justin’s last and that at any moment Justin could just slip away without him ever telling him that he loved him.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Upon arriving at the hospital, Justin was once again rushed into surgery covered in blood leaving Brian sitting in the same waiting room, clothes drenched in Justin’s blood.

Again.

This was the second time in five fucking years someone had tried to kill Justin. Five years ago, Brian had been given a second chance with Justin and he had royally fucked it up and so had Justin. All Brian wanted was one more chance. He vowed to which ever deity was listening that he wouldn’t fuck it up. He just needed Justin to live then he could tell and prove to Justin how much he, Brian fucking Kinney, Stud of Liberty Avenue, loved him.

Brian was so desperately willing Justin to live through this that he didn’t register the arrival of the family until Jennifer touched his shoulder and shook him.

“Brian, how is he? Do you know anything yet?” her voice was tinged with hysterical fear.

“No. I don’t know a fucking thing. He’s in surgery now.”

Jennifer didn’t reply. She simply sank into the chair next to him and held onto his arm. After a few moments, Brian flipped his hand palm up and grabbed her hand, intertwining their fingers in an attempt to comfort hem both. The two of them both sat in the waiting room, holding onto each other. Tucker sat down on Jennifer’s other side and held her other hand. Brian and Jennifer each sat and remembered the last time they had been here for Justin. This time though they had each other for comfort.

“Thank you,” came Jennifer’s voice, barely above a whisper.

“What?” Brian turned to look at her startled, he’d almost forgotten that she was beside him.

“Thank you for giving me my son back, for loving him even if you won’t say it out loud.”

Clearing his throat, Brian looked away and whispered “I do love him. I do.”

A squeeze on his hand was the only reply for which he was extremely grateful. They slipped into silence once again. Never taking note of the bustling family members sitting in chairs all around him. People came and went, some if not all attempting to talk to the pair at some point or another.

Tucker pressed a cup of coffee into their hands at some point and attempted to feed them. Both Jennifer and Brian had been grateful for the coffee but couldn’t stomach the idea of eating anything.

After about an hour and a half, Carl had shown up and brought with him a spare change of clothes for waiting pair. Brian was extremely reluctant to move. Irrationally, he felt as though if he moved he might not be there when they brought news of Justin. Ben assured him that if anything happened he would fetch him immediately.

Reluctantly Brian made his way to the nearest restroom and tried to clean himself up the best he could. Having seen what he looked lie in the mirror, the brunette had suddenly been desperate to get eh blood soaked clothes off, unable to stand them a second longer.

Exhausted and worried, Brian made his way back to the waiting room and once again took up his position beside an equally fearful Jennifer. A sudden though occurred to him between his muddled thoughts.

“Has someone called Molly and Daphne?” Brian rasped. His throat felt raw and unused.

Jennifer shook her head as did all those around him.

“Molly’s at a friend. I’d far rather tell her in person and when I have more news. I can’t remember Daphne’s cell number.”

Brian stood up and pulled out his cell. “I’ll call her.”

Jenifer reached out and squeezed his hands for a few seconds. “Thanks, Brian.”

Brian made his way to the hospital entrance, his cell in his hands and took a deep breath of the cold night air. He didn’t want to make this phone call but he owed it to both Daphne and Justin to be the one to do it.

She picked up after two rings and Brian quickly gave her the outline of all that he knew. He didn’t tell her how his heart was beating in terror. She would know. He didn’t tell her about the sticky feeling of Justin’s blood soaking into his pants. It was something he would refer never thinking about again.

Daphne demanded to know which hospital they were at and Brian didn’t hesitate to tell her. He could already hear the sounds of her quickly throwing on some clothes and heading out the door.

He was entirely positive that this was the absolute worst day of his life, worse than when Justin had been bashed, worse than when he had found out about the cancer. The only thing that would make it better was when Justin woke up.

If he woke up a traitorous voice whispered in the back of his mind.

No. No, he was not going there. He couldn’t go there.

Three hours later a tired looking doctor in a white lab coat over stained scrubs walked into the waiting room.

“Who is here for Justin Taylor?”

Nearly half the waiting room stood up at the question, Brian and Jennifer at the front.

“I’m his partner.”

“I’m his mother.”

“I’m Dr. Brandon, I operated on your son. Mrs Taylor, if you would come with me and we could discuss your son’s condition and the treatment plan.”

Grabbing Brian by the arm, Jennifer marched right up to the doctor.

“This is my son’s partner. You treat him as you would any other husband and tell the both of us how Justin is.”

At any other time, Brian would have smirked. It appeared that Debbie had rubbed off on Jennifer. She had come a long way from the woman that had first walked into his office. Looking momentarily startled, the doctor quickly recovered.

“Justin has lost a lot of blood and we had to give him a transfusion. A piece of the debris punctured his spleen and we were forced to remove it. He also had some internal bleeding that we were able to stop. He has a mild concussion but because of his previous head injury we are going to keep a close eye on it in case it starts bleeding on the brain. He is going to be in the ICU for two days and then we will move him to the ward for a week before he can go home if nothing else goes wrong. Justin is holding his own and is very lucky to be alive.”

“When can we see him?” Jennifer asked as it appeared that Brian had lost his voice.

“You can see him now for fifteen minutes and then every two hours for fifteen minutes until he is moved to the ward and then you can stick to visiting hours.”

“Why does he need to stay here so long? He hates hospitals,” Brian spoke for the first time since the doctor had started talking.

“Because his spleen was removed, he runs a very high risk of infection until his liver can take over. Once he is released from hospital he will need to have as little contact with lots of people for a couple of weeks until his body adjusts.”

“Okay. We want to see him now,” Brian seemed to slowly be getting back in control but he needed to see for himself that Justin was alright.

“Come with me.” With that the doctor turned around and walked through the double doors he had been standing in front of with Brian and Jennifer following close behind on his heels.

It was relatively quiet behind the double doors. Most of the sound was coming from all the hissing and beeping of the machines hooked up to various patients. A moan broke through the steady hum of the machines. A moan which Brian knew intimately. Without a second's thought, Brian walked straight to the bed that held Justin. Justin was twitching and becoming more and more restless as he slow gained consciousness.

Brian only paused for a second at the sight of Justin lying in the bed looking so pale with a couple machines attached. Careful not to disrupt anything, Brian stroked Justin face while quietly whispering to him. Justin immediately stopped fidgeting and slowly opened his eyes again.

“B.Brian?”

“Shhh. You’re okay now sunshine. Everything is going to be alright.”

“What…What happened? Why am I in the hospital?” Justin began to sound more and more panicked.

“I’ll explain later. Just calm down and get some rest.”

Jennifer and the doctor were standing at the foot of the bed watching the scene unfold in front of them. Jennifer looked on with a fond expression on her face while the doctor’s face was carefully blank.

When Brian sat down on the edge of the bed to be closer to Justin and to continue quietly talking to the blonde, the doctor stepped forward with the intention of separating the two. The head nurse of the ICU, however, stepped forward to intercept the doctor before he reached the couple.

“Leave them be. Brian keeps Justin calm and it’s in the patient’s best interest that he stay calm and as still as possible. Surely you want the best for your patient, Doctor?”

This caused the man to stop where he was and look directly at the nurse. After looking him in the eye for a few seconds, he looked away, turned around and walked out the ICU muttering about being back later to check on the patient.

The quiet scene had caught the attention of both Brian and Jennifer who were on either side of Justin’s bed.

“Thank you, Miguel,” Brian quietly said as he approached them.

“Not a problem though I must be honest Brian, I never wanted to see you here haunting the halls again but you’re actually in the room with Justin this time so I must say that is an improvement.” Just a touch of a smirk graced Miguel’s face before he once again looked serious.

“Mmmm”

“Justin? Sweetheart? Can you hear us?” Jennifer queried.

“What happened?”

Justin’s eyes kept fluttering open and closed.

“He will be pretty disorientated for a while. The important thing is to keep him calm and as still as possible so that he doesn’t pull his stitches.” This was said with a pointed look at Brian.

“Just relax, Justin. I’ll explain later when you’re more coherent.” With that said Brian couldn’t resist placing a kiss on Justin’s forehead.

Jennifer just watched with a small smile on her face. She had finally accepted that Justin loved Brian and he always would and that Brian did in fact love her son and no matter what the two would always come back to each other in the end with no exception.

“I’m going to let the others know that he’s going to be all right and then I’m going to go home and shower and phone Molly to tell her what happened. She is at a friend and I’m sure she is terrified,” Jennifer spoke softly to Brian while running her hand down the side of Justin’s face.

Without taking his eyes and hands off Justin, Brian replied, “I’m going to stay here with him.”

“I was counting on that Brian”

To Brian’s total surprise, Jennifer walked around the bed and gave him a hug and a kiss on the check.

“I’ll come back later to sit with him and you can go home then if you want to.”

“I’m staying with him until I absolutely have to leave him”

Jennifer turned and walked out. At the door, she looked over her shoulder at Brian sitting by Justin.

Yes. He really does love him and will take care of him no matter what.

With that comforting thought, Jennifer walked out to meet the family leaving Brian and Justin talking quietly and whispering promises of love and comfort.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jennifer was immediately surrounded when she walked slowly back into the waiting room.

“Is he ok?”

“How long is he going to be here?”

“What’s wrong with him?”

Jennifer held her hand up to stop all the bombarding questions coming at her from all directions. Her nerves were shot, her son was once again in hospital from serious injuries, it had been an incredibly long night and she still had to deal with Molly. She simply did not have the patience to answer everyone’s individual questions even if it made her a bitch.

“He is going to be ok. He has to stay in the ICU for the next two days. For now only Brian, Molly and I are allowed there to see him. His spleen was removed so he runs a very high risk a catching an infection so the less people he is exposed to right now the better.”

Tucker came up behind her as she was speaking and slipped his arm around her waist silently lending her his support. He knew that she was seconds away from collapsing.

“I’m going to go home now and I suggest you all do the same. We could all do with some rest.”

“But where is Brian?” Michael’s voice came out in his usual whine.

“He is staying with Justin,” was Jennifer’s simple answer.

“I thought that he could only see him for ten or so minutes according to hospital rules,” Lindsay sounded nearly as whiny as Michael.

“The head of the ICU recognised Brian from last time Justin was in hospital and has given permission for him to stay with him.”

“How could they recognise Brian he wasn’t here that long and he didn’t even visit Justin?” Mel still sounded pissed at Brian for that.

“Actually Brian was here every night that Justin was in hospital.” Jennifer contradicted.

She was getting tired of people thinking the worst of Brian. Sure, she had done it too in the beginning but now she knew better. The others had known Brian how long? You would have thought that they would know him well enough by now.

Shocked silence greeted her statement before everyone started talking, well more like shouting at once.

“No, he wasn’t. I’m his best friend. He would have told me.”

“Why didn’t he say anything?”

“I knew he loved Sunshine.”

“Why didn’t we know?”

“But Brian doesn’t love Justin like that. He’s just a trick that never left.”

“ENOUGH,” Jennifer shouted. “This has nothing to do with any of you. My sons’ relationship is personal and your opinions and comments are not appreciated.”

Stunned silence greeted her. Tucker had walked up behind her and helped her to put her coat on.

Shrugging into her warm coat, she continued softer, “We are all tired, in shock and in desperate need of a shower. There is no point in sitting around here. We can do nothing now. Everyone needs to go home and rest. Others were not so lucky in surviving and their partners and families are going to need support.”

This had the desired affect and soon enough everyone had cleared out the waiting area, walking to their cars in twos and threes.

“Why didn’t Brian tell me about staying at the hospital with Justin? I’m supposed to be his best friend,” Michael continued to whine to Ben on the way to their car.

Having expected this, Ben decided that just maybe his brunette husband needed a wake up call and might actually listen to reason this time.

“Michael, I think that things have changed. You may be Brian’s oldest friend but I believe that Justin is now his best and closest friend. Like it is with us, right?”

“Right…” the slow response came as Michael began to really think about what Ben had said.

~XOX~

“Mel, I’m confused. Why would Brian have stayed with Justin and why is he staying now? They aren’t even together anymore.”

“Sonofabitch,” Melanie whispered under her breath as she came to a startling realisation.

“What Mel?”

“He actually loves Justin. He really loves him. He’s not just fucking with him.”

Lindsay’s face quickly matched Melanie’s for shock and disbelief as they walked to the car.

~XOX~

“Jennifer, are you sure that you want to go home? I can always go for you and bring you back some things,” Tucker reassured her, wanting to do something, anything to help her out.

“No, I need to see Molly. Besides after all this time, I know Brian loves Justin and will look after him. I trust him.” She smiled slightly to herself after that.

They climbed into the car and drove to Molly’s friend, Amber. It was a relatively short drive that was done in companionable silence. Each taking the time to sort through their own thoughts. Jennifer especially was thinking on how to explain everything that had happened to Molly.

The front door flew open as they pulled into the driveway and before Jennifer even had a chance to climb out of the car; her daughter came hurtling towards her.

“MOM! Mom are you okay? Where’s Justin? Is he hurt? Is he okay? Why isn’t he with you?”

The mother grabbed her daughter in a fierce hug effectively cutting off all of the questions. After a few moments, she pulled away slightly.
“Molly, Justin is alive but he’s in the hospital. He was hurt badly in the explosion.” This was greeted with a look of absolute panic from the younger sibling.

“He will be fine, darling. Brian is at the hospital with him now. We can collect a few things from home and then you can go and see him. Okay?” she reassured her daughter while stroking her fingers through the young girl’s hair in a comforting gesture.

“Brian’s there?” she was confused. “Did they get back together and didn’t tell me?”

“No, but Brian found out about the explosion and drove to the club and ran into the burning ruins like a mad man looking for Justin. I wouldn’t be surprised if they got back together. Actually I think it would be a great thing. Justin and Brian are better together.”

Molly smiled briefly before her face fell. “Can we go please mom? I want to see him for myself.”

Tucking a strand of hair behind Molly’s ear she answered, “Of course.” She lifted her head to look at Amber and her parents over Molly’s shoulder. “Thank you for having her and sorry for cutting this visit short.”

Amber immediately came up and hugged her friend. “It’s not a problem. I hope your brother heals quickly. Don’t worry so much. Go and see him.”

“Thanks Amber,” she replied returning her hug.

“We’re gonna head home first so that I can clean up properly and grab a few things for your brother before we go to the hospital, sweetie,” Jennifer told her daughter as Tucker reversed out of the driveway.

Molly nodded in understanding and watched the houses go by as they drove down the street.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jennifer and Molly had come and gone. Brian had continued sitting in the chair besides Justin’s bed, eventually resting his head by the blonde’s hand and closing his eyes when exhaustion crept up on him. Miguel had checked on his patient while Justin slept through it all.

Blue eyes drifted open as the young blonde slowly woke. His left hand twitched and was squeezed by something warm and solid. Curious, he opened his eyes and glanced down at his hand. What he saw took his breath away.

Brian was sleeping in a chair that he had obviously brought closer to the bed in which Justin lay. The brunette was holding his hand and his other arm was being used as a pillow for his head next to Justin’s thigh. Brian was facing towards Justin and the younger man could only lie in the bed and stare.

Fuck he had missed this. He had already been having doubts about once again leaving Brian. It seemed that every time he wasn’t happy with him, he left. Perhaps they both had commitment issues.

All he had wanted for years was a life with Brian. He wanted more from his life than what he currently had. Fuck it!! He had almost died. AGAIN. Enough was enough. He and Brian were going to get this right once and for all. Justin wasn’t exactly sure how to accomplish that but it was just details so who cared? He would come up with something.

Brian was sitting by him in the hospital with him and by the looks of it hadn’t even gone home. That meant that he had to really care for him a lot. So he had something to work with. Justin just had to make the caring a little more and show Brian that he did indeed love him and wouldn’t ever willingly leave him again no matter how pissed off he got. Maybe Brian needed that kind of reassurance and security before he would be willing to admit that he loved the blonde.

Yes, he liked that idea.

His musings were interrupted by a nurse that he recognised. His name was... Miguel. Yes Miguel. Who happened to be coming towards his bed to check on him again.

“Hey, sleeping beauty. Welcome back. How are you feeling? Any excessive pain? That drip in your arm is full of painkillers so you shouldn’t feel much,” he spoke quietly to avoid waking Brian who had only just fallen asleep.

“Hi, you’re Miguel. You were with me last time weren’t you?”
“Yes I was. Now about that pain.”

“I’m okay. Don’t really feel much of anything at the moment but I do feel drowsy.”

“That’s also to be expected young man. I must say that I’m happy Brian decided to join you inside the hospital room this time,” he slyly slipped to Justin, positive that with what he knew about Brian the brunette wouldn’t have said a word.

“He what? He was…there?” came the soft exclamation, confusion colouring his tone.

Cheerfully, Miguel continued, “Yip, the whole time. Used to come every night. Anyway, must check on my other patients.” With that he walked away.

Justin didn’t even notice him leaving. Brian was with him last time. He had been there the whole time and never told him.

FUCK. That is so typical Brian. He let so many little things slip I can’t believe I didn’t notice. Stupid ass. It would have made such a difference if I had known. I would never have left him for Ethan. Fucking idiot. I’m so going to kill him.

Justin stopped mid rant as he felt Brian begin to stir. He released Justin’s hand to rub his eyes and suddenly froze, slowly lowering his hands as he felt someone staring at him.

“Justin,” he breathed relieved once again that his blonde was alive.

Justin stared into brown eyes before uttering, “You were here last time?”

This was met with a guilty, deer in the headlights look from Brian. It was all he needed as confirmation.

“Why didn’t you come into the room or tell me?” all the pain from the past was echoed in his voice.

Justin held Brian’s eyes for a long moment, trying to see answers in the hazel depths. Unable to stand the scrutiny Brian broke contact and looked away.

Justin was about to say something when he heard Brian’s soft response, “I didn’t know how to tell you. It was… I…” his voice trailed off, and he tightened his fingers around Justin’s.

Justin replied quietly, “I know. I know that now but I needed to know that back then, Brian. You need to stop doing shit like that.”

He decided not to press the issue. It was in the past and although it hurt and made him angry all he would do was push Brian away if he pressed his point. Which was the opposite of what he wanted to achieve. With this added information, he was certain that Brian loved him and was absolutely determined to get the brunette to admit it. So he let go of his anger and decided to focus on something else.

Changing the subject, he asked softly, “Do you know how long I’m going to have to be in here?”

Brian was relieved to have an answer for the young blonde, “You have to stay here in the ICU for the next two days and then in a ward for the next week before they will consider letting you leave. The doctor said that when you were awake, he would come explain it to us in more detail.”

“I don’t want to stay here for so long. I hate hospitals!”

“I know but I promise that this time I will stay with you.”

“Really?”

He received a nod in response. The two had fallen into such an easy pattern that to both it felt as if they were together again, something they both wanted. With a silent conversation, this was conveyed and it was also silently decided that they would try to reconcile. The how’s and long conversations could wait for later. Right now they just sat close to each other absorbing the others presence like starving men. This time they would get it right and screw everyone else.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended



Chapter Five

At the end of Justin’s second day in ICU, he sent Brian home to get some much needed rest.

“I’m not leaving you.”

“Brian, you need to go home. Sleep in a bed for a change, eat some real food and have a proper shower. You can be back early tomorrow morning when I get moved to my new room. Miguel said that he’s arranged for a cot to be put in the room with me so you can then sleep by me if you want to but for tonight you have to fucking go and get some proper rest.”

Brian had still looked unsure.

“Brian go. I promise that I will be fine. Miguel is working tonight and will call you if there is a need.”

Finally, the brunette caved, “Alright. I’ll go but I’ll be back.”

“I never doubted that.”

Reflecting on the conversation the next morning, Justin smiled. Brian really had changed from that first night that they had met five years ago.

“Hey Justin, it’s time to move you,” Miguel cheerfully informed his patient.

“Can we wait a few more minutes, please? Brian will be here soon.”

“Of course. And Justin, you’re a great guy to have around but I would prefer it if I never saw you in here again. Deal?”

Justin laughed. “You and me both. You have a deal.”

“I second that motion,” a voice said from beside them.

“Brian. Morning, you like you slept much better.”

Brian just smiled not wanting to admit that the young blonde had been right about his sleeping arrangements. It didn’t work. Justin knew him so well that one look at the brunette’s face had him laughing quietly under his breath.

“Ok Sunshine, let’s go see these new accommodations of yours.”

~XOX~

Over the next two weeks, Brain and Justin established a sort of routine. Brian slept in the cot next to Justin’s bed every night. They had breakfast together and got presentable for the morning round of visitors. After visiting hours, Brian sat with his laptop and worked on his latest campaign. After the first day, Justin helped him. The artist had many useful ideas and had grown bored with the T.V. quickly. The two worked well as a team and could almost read each others’ minds and didn’t need to be told in detail what the other was thinking.

They had visitors in the afternoon again and Justin often saw his mom and Brian standing to one side whispering. This made him very nervous, if the two of them were on the same side and hatching a scheme together, it almost certainly concerned him but neither would say a word.

The day before Justin was to be released Brian and Jennifer could once again be found standing to the side whispering.

“Is everything organised?”

“I phoned today to confirm your reservations, Brian”

“Thank you. I made the bookings online but I couldn’t really phone with Justin around. I want it to stay a surprise. He and I don’t really have the best track record when it comes to this stuff you know.”

Jennifer laughed quietly, “Oh, I know. I’m just glad that I could help. It’s a wonderful idea and probably better than what the doctor had in mind.”

Brian looked nervous. “Mother Taylor, would you mind stepping into the hall with me for a minute?”

“Sure. We’ll be right back”, the last was directed at Daphne and Justin.

The two stepped into the hall.

“You’re right. They are acting weird, Justin.”

“I know. I just wish I knew what they were up to.”

“Don’t worry, Jus. This is your mom and Brian we are talking about. It won’t be that bad. Granted Brian’s surprises in the past have mostly been disasters but now your mom is obviously involved. You’ll find out soon enough.”

Justin looked at his oldest friend suspiciously, “You don’t know anything do you, Daf?

“Me?” she asked pointing at herself. “Sadly this time I have been left out of the loop. But anyway, change in subject. You must be happy to finally be getting out of here. Any big plans?” was asked quite suggestively.

“You know I do. This is it Daphne. This is the end of the road. We are going to work and fuck everything and everyone else. No more break ups and getting back together although I wouldn’t mind the make up sex.”

The two of them stared at each other before bursting into laughter as Brain and Jennifer walked back into the room.

“What’s so funny?” The brunette asked his younger lover.

Justin and Daphne turned to look at him and just laughed harder. He turned to Jennifer who simply shrugged her shoulders.

The two laughed harder because it was great to be able to let some of the stress of the last two weeks go even if it was through hilarity. Neither could remember when they had laughed so hard or long.

Brian sat down smiling. It was wonderful to hear him laugh again. Fuck but he had missed that laugh, the sunshine smile, the public service announcements. He had missed his blonde. Period.

Once Jennifer and Daphne had left, Brian walked over to Justin lying on the bed.

“Move over.”

Justin smiled as he did just that and Brian climbed in next to him and wrapped an arm around his shoulders.

“What are we watching tonight, Sunshine?” he asked a he turned the screen on.

“Mmmmm… how about Yellow Submarine?”

Brian smiled while rolling his eyes. The younger man never seemed to tire of the movie and although he wouldn’t admit it aloud. It had kind of grown on him as well.

He pressed play and settled in to watch the movie but as it went on, he found himself watching Justin more and more, enjoying his reactions to the movie. Brian was finally content with his life and it was thanks to the blonde man resting in his arms.

Justin sat on the edge of his hospital bed waiting for Brian to come and pick him up. Today was the day that he was getting discharged and got to get out of the hospital. Hopefully permanently.

As he sat waiting, he played some memories through his mind of what had happened during the last two weeks when he had been moved from the ICU.

FLASH

The first time the gang was allowed to visit, they had to come in small groups. The first was of course Debbie with Emmett and Drew following closely behind.

“Fuck Sunshine, don’t you ever do that again. Twice in one lifetime is more than enough, thank you,” was the first thing out of the loud redhead’s mouth.

Justin tried to smile but it didn’t come out all too well.

“Honey, I’m so glad you’re okay,” Emmett exclaimed hurrying over to Justin and hugging him despite the glare that Brian sent his way. He was very careful not to touch any of Justin’s bandages that had stitches underneath.

Drew stayed in the background not wanting to intrude. He was new to the group and didn’t know Justin all that well.

“Hi, Drew,” Justin greeted him.

“Justin. It’s good to see you awake.”

“How long are you going to be in here, Sunshine?” Debbie demanded to know cutting straight to the point.

“He’s going to be in here for about two weeks, Deb.” Brian was the one to answer her question.

“Brian!” Debbie exclaimed shocked, only now having noticed the brunette standing by his supposed ex’s bed side. “What are you doing here?”

“Where else would I be when my partner is in hospital, having almost died again?”

The look on Debbie and Emmett’s faces was one that Justin would treasure for as long as he lived. Brian had finally succeeded in rendering Debbie speechless.

It didn’t last for long though.

“Oh sweetie,” Emmett gushed, “I’m so happy for you. It’s about time you two got yourselves sorted out.”

Debbie gave Brian a smile that showed just how proud she was of the brunette before sweeping him up in an all encompassing hug.

“Good on you. It’s about time. You deserve to be happy,” Debbie whispered as she clutched him.

“Thanks, Ma.” Brian gave her a tiny smile.

“So what do you do for entertainment around here?” Emmett broke the serious mood in the room, giving everyone a chance to recover themselves before they chatted aimlessly.

FLASH

Thinking about that first visit and Debbie’s shock, Justin thought back to the night before that and the conversation that he and Brian had had finally had about their relationship.

FLASH

Justin woke to Brian’s arms wrapped tightly around him. When he tried to move, the brunette hugged him tighter and blinked a couple of times before slowly waking.

“Brian, I’m alright. Minus a spleen but I’m alright.”

“No jokes, Justin,” he murmured quietly.

He looked down into the blue eyes staring up at him and sighed. He supposed that this conversation was long overdue and he couldn’t put it off any longer.

“I almost lost you. You were almost killed for the second time in five years,” he had to stop here as images flashed before his eyes of both accidents; both Justin’s covered in blood.

He tilted his head down, nuzzling the blonde’s ear. Brian inhaled the smell of his blonde mixed with hospital antiseptic soap.

He put his lips right next to Justin’s ear as if to kiss it and whispered, “I love you.”

Startled, Justin froze but that was all the acknowledgement that Brian received to his declaration, so he decided to try again.

This time he spoke more firmly, “I love you, Justin.” He leaned down slightly and kissed the frozen man’s ear.

Tears ran silently down Justin’s face. He couldn’t believe that Brian had actually said it all by himself with no prodding. It had gotten to the point where he had resigned himself to a life of never hearing Brian telling him how he felt.

Overwhelmed, he turned his head into Brian’s chest and replied, “I love you.”

Brian smiled. For a moment there, he had thought that maybe Justin wouldn’t reply, that he had finally pushed too far and ruined things between them.

“I want you to come back to the loft. I want you to come home. It’s been empty since you left.”

Justin hesitated. It seemed that every time they lived together something went wrong. “I don’t know.”

Brain had been expecting this. Justin wasn’t the blonde twink from five years ago that would jump at the chance to live with him. This man was older and a lot more cautious, in large part thanks to him.

“No more secrets, no more pushing. Partners and equals.”

Justin decided to throw caution to the wind. No matter what, he knew he would always go back to Brian, so he might as well spare them all the drama.

“Okay. I will need to get my stuff, though.”

“Ask Daphne. When you get home, all your stuff will already be there. Your apartment’s for shit anyway. You shouldn’t even go there. Don’t want to chance you catching anything.”

FLASH

That conversation still had the power to bring a smile to his face and he needed to smile. Physiotherapy had never been his favourite. Having to once again fight to have control over his body was worse than the last time. This time he knew how difficult it would be and how long it would take. His hand still wasn’t what it used to be and that was after years of therapy.

FLASH

He had been in his new room with Brian for all of a day when the doctor came on his usual check up and explained the next step in his recovery.

“Justin, you are going to need to start physio today. Your Physiotherapist will be here shortly to explain everything to you. If everything goes well, and she gives you the say so, you will be discharged in two weeks. Ah, and here she is now.”

A neatly dressed blonde woman walked into the room. “Hello, I’m Anna. I’ll be your physiotherapist. I know you had another physio last time but he transferred to Wyoming.”

Brian and Justin just looked at her, the latter smiling slightly, and nodded for her to continue. She sat in the chair since Brian was sitting on the bed with his partner.

“Today we are going to just start with getting you into this chair. Over the next few days, we’ll try walking a few steps. Every day going just a bit further. This is to prevent fluid collecting in Justin’s lungs because he’s laying down, which could lead to him developing pneumonia, Hypostatic Pneumonia”

“What is it? What does it mean?” Brian asked needing to understand everything that would or could happen.

“It’s literally because you’re laying flat and fluid collects and then bugs grow. The sooner a patient can be mobilized the better,” she looked at their worried faces and was quick to reassure them.

“Don’t worry. We’ll have you moving before it can happen but I feel that it’s better that a patient understands things than blindly following orders. Makes them more motivated.”

“Is there anything else I should know before we get started, Anna?” Justin asked trying to keep the mood light.

“Yes, there is another thing but it’s nothing to worry about. Most patients, after abdominal surgery, tend to want to walk hunched over to “protect” the injured site. It’s a challenge for physios and nurses to make them stand up straight even though the stitches do pull a bit. So I will push you a bit and you may hate me for it but the faster you get better, the faster you can get out of here.

FLASH

She had been right. She was the kind of person you liked and hated all at the same time. She had pushed him and it had been painful and difficult but he had managed to walk relatively straight and was functioning a lot better. In the end, Justin supposed that it had all been worth it because now he was going home. As he thought that, a familiar figure appeared.

“Hey Sunshine, you ready to bust outta this joint?”

The blonde grinned, a smile truly worth his name sake, and answered, “You bet your ass I am.”

“I would do no such thing unless it was sure thing that you would win, Sunshine,” Brian was quick to reply, a sexy smirk on his face as he looked down at Justin.

Justin just laughed. He was going home with Brian where he belonged, and just maybe he could figure out what his partner and mother had been up to. He loved a good puzzle after all.

The drive to the loft was for the most part a silent one, but a comfortable silence. Both Brian and Justin were pondering on their own thoughts.

Brian was glad to be taking Justin home. Home. He smiled at this. The loft was only really home when Justin was there. The brunette also knew his younger partner was extremely curious as to what he and Mother Taylor were planning… Justin was practically bouncing in his seat. Too bad he wouldn’t get any answers out of him.

Brian was right. Justin sat beside him in the car planning different ways to find out what was going on between his mother and Brian. Maybe if he snooped around the loft, he could find something to give him a clue to what was going on. Brian’s voice broke through his thoughts.

“We’re home, Sunshine. Come on let’s get you inside.”

Brian helped Justin up the front steps and in to the lift. Once they reached the loft, Brian walked ahead and pulled the door open turning to Justin,

“Home, sweet home.”

Justin’s eyes immediately started darting around looking for clues. Brian laughed softly beside him. He ran fingers through the blonde’s hair which had started growing out a bit again.

“Give that gerbil in your head a rest. You’re not going to find out anything until tomorrow, Justin.”

Justin looked at Brian and pouted for a few seconds before deciding to leave it for now. He was getting tired anyway. When he had his strength back, he could try questioning Brian. Brian noticed the sleepy look in his blue eyes and gently led him to the bedroom.

“Come on. Why don’t we lie down for a while, hmm?”

Brian pulled back the covers as Justin slowly stripped with Brian soon assisting him. The blonde caught his partner’s hand to get his attention.

“Will you stay with me?” The question was asked so softly that Brian almost missed it. He smiled at the bent head. It was Justin’s first night out of the hospital since the bombing and even if this was home, he was allowed to feel a little uncertain.

“You have to ask?” was all Brain answered while stripping. He climbed in behind Justin and wrapped his arms around his blonde. The younger man instantly relaxed and leaned back into the embrace.

Lying in Brian’s arms, Justin’s mind began to wander. Mel and Lindsay’s first visit came to mind as he thought about his most recent stay in hospital.

FLASH

Justin was sitting up in bed with Brian sitting in the chair beside him. Lindsay and Melanie walked into the room and headed straight for Justin. Neither of them noticed Brian, they were so focused on the blonde.

“Honey, are you okay? Do you need anything? How are you feeling?” Lindsay was in full mothering mode and it irritated Justin that she still wanted to treat him like he was a kid.

“Fuck, Lids. Let him breathe before you start the inquisition,” Brian commented.

Lindsay looked so shocked you could have knocked her over with a feather. Melanie just smiled and nodded at Brian. She finally understood him.

“Brian. What are you doing here?”

“Where else did you expect me to be Lindsay?”

Justin and Melanie were silently watching the verbal tennis match between the long time friends.

“I thought you would have still left on your trip. You know. Just catch a later flight.”

“What the fuck, Lids? If Mel had been injured in the blast where would you be right now?” Brian was truly angry now. He knew that Lindsay was often blind when it came to his relationship with Justin but he had had no idea that she had such a low opinion of him.

Lindsay replied, still not grasping the implications, “At her beside. But Brian I don’t get what that has to do with why you’re here. It’s not the same for you and Justin.”

“Justin is my PARTNER. I’m staying with my partner in hospital until he’s well enough to come home.”

Lindsay looked confused, “But Brian…”

Melanie interrupted her before Brian or Justin could do any damage.
“Justin we hope that you recover quickly. We’ll come and visit again, bring Gus with us.” Turning to Lindsay she held onto her wife’s arm as she steered her out the room, “Come along Linds, let’s get home to the kids.”

Mel led a confused Lindsay out the hospital and hoped that maybe this time, when she explained it, the blonde woman would get it. Otherwise she just might lose Brian’s friendship. This time it looked like Brian was holding nothing back. About damn time too.

FLASH

Brian felt Justin twitch in his arms and glanced at the blonde head tucked under his chin. “What are you smiling about?” he asked suspiciously

“The first time Mel and Lindsay came to visit me.”

“And what about that memory could possibly be funny.

“It’s not funny. It’s just that you stood up for us.”

That was all that needed to be said. Brian understood what Justin was talking about and why he was smiling. They lay in each other’s arms and drifted off to sleep with smiles on their faces eagerly awaiting tomorrow, both happy to be home and in each other’s arms where they belonged.

“Sunshine, rise and shine,” were the first whispered words that Justin heard in his ear as he slowly drifted towards consciousness the next morning.

His response was a grunt and to bury deeper under the warm, comfortable covers. Unfortunately, this didn’t deter Brian in the slightest. He’d shared the same bed with Justin numerous times and knew that the blonde was not a morning person at eh best of times. Nibbling briefly at the blonde’s ear, he continued to coax Justin towards the land of the living.

“Justin... Justin you have to get your ass out of bed. We need to get moving.”

“Moving where?” came the mumble from beneath the pile of bed covers.

“You’re going to have to get up and see for yourself.”

“Don’t wanna,” came from the lump in the bed.

“Oh, it’s just that yesterday you were practically bouncing off the walls to find out what was going on, but I suppose if you really don’t want to know you can always go back to sleep,” Brian commented with a smirk.

This was met with Justin shoving the covers off to look up at the brunette.

“Seriously? You’re going to tell me what’s going on?”

“No.” Justin’s face fell. Brian continued speaking, “You have to come with me and see for yourself.”

“Where are we going?”

“Not telling you, Sunshine. You have to wait and see.”

Justin pouted. Brian simply ran a hand through Justin’s hair before rising and walking away in the general direction of the kitchen. Making his mind up, the blonde got out of bed made a detour to the bathroom and then followed his partner.

“Since you won’t tell me what’s going on, at least tell me what I should wear?”

Brian looked up from his coffee and answered, “Something comfortable and travel-worthy.”

Now Justin was even more confused but nodded his head and went to dress. It took him a while to get into his clothes due to his injuries pulling but he was determined to dress himself.

Once he was dressed, the blonde returned to the kitchen to grab himself something to eat.

Half an hour later found Brian packing a bag with their toiletries into the car. Justin went from confused to shocked when he noticed suitcases already packed in the car. Brian noticed the blonde’s reaction, but all he did was smile; which was becoming annoying; and pulled open the door for his blonde. Justin sighed and climbed into the car.

They were on the road for about an hour when Justin asked Brain something that was bothering him.

“Brian, why didn’t we fly to wherever it is that we’re going? It would have been a lot faster.”

“The Doctor said that while your lungs are okay for you to travel on an airplane, he didn’t advise being cooped up with a number of people in a metal tin all breathing and coughing the same air. He would have preferred that you wait at least six weeks to fly so we’re driving.”

“Driving to where?” Justin attempted to ask innocently but failed miserably.

The brunette glanced at him, “Nice try.”

Half an hour later, the pair stopped at a gas station and adjoining diner.

Justin smiled at his partner. Brian just laughed quietly. The blonde seemed to have a bottomless pit when it came to his stomach.

They ordered lunch and made a trip to the bathroom, where Justin grabbed Brian and dragged him into a stall at the end.

The blonde leaned against the door, locking it with the hand that was behind his back, all the while smirking at Brian. Said person returned the smirk with a wicked smile full of sex and mischief.

Neither knew who moved first but in a second they were in each other’s arms. Brian’s one hand was holding the back of Justin’s head while he ran his tongue along the younger man’s lips begging entry which was granted a split second later. While his tongue was mapping out the other man’s mouth, his other hand had slipped around his waist and was now squeezing Justin’s ass.

Needing more skin, the brunette, slipped his hand beneath his partner’s pants to find the soft skin beneath, causing Justin to let out a moan and clutch at Brian’s back and ass tighter where his hands were fondling.

The pair were becoming desperate. Neither had had sex in over two weeks.

Surprisingly, it was Brian that pulled away. “We have to slow down, Sunshine. You’re still healing.”

“I’m fine, Brian.”

“Justin, when we get there, if you’re still fine, we can fuck all day but not here. We have to be careful and we still have a long drive ahead of us. You don’t need to be uncomfortable for that.”

Justin stared at Brian while the mantra of Brian Kinney gives a shit! Danced around in his head. Brian was determined to look after him and he knew no amount of arguing would get him anywhere.

Taking a deep breath, he answered, “Ok”

He leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on the brunette’s slightly swollen lips. Justin unlocked the stall, walked out and then turned to Brian, “Come on, our food will be getting cold.”

Justin managed to finish his burger and chips despite his appetite having not been at its best. Brian had his cup of coffee and a muffin.

After their meal, the pair headed to the car and set out on the road once more. They chatted about anything and everything. Catching up on what had been going on in each other’s lives recently in the weeks that Justin hadn’t been living in the loft. They made plans to take Gus to a local fair in a month’s time, discussed some of Brian’s new clients and campaign strategies.

Neither of them could stop the smiles that were on their faces. They were together and were finally in a real relationship. It was all that they could have asked for.