The field is bloody massive. All I can see is grass and trees and water and oh…wait, is that a castle in the distance? I can’t really tell. Meli had taken up residence under my hat, claiming it smelt nice under there. Weird dyke. “HELLO THAR!!!!” My eyes widen as I look about madly, “Who’s there!? I know karate!” I yell back, making a few ninja moves and falling flat on my face with a groan, “ZACKY!” Zacky: WASN’T ME! I look up and, low and behold, there’s a ruddy big fucking OWL talking to me. Talking trees, talking owls, yup I can definitely go to my grave saying I’ve seen it all. “YER OFF TO SEE THE PRINCESS AYYYYYYE!?” Christ, why’s he yelling? And he sounds like a stoned cowboy. “ITS THATA WAY! OVER THAT HILL, PAST THAT RANDOMLY PLACED COW AND UNDER THE ARCHWAY THAT SAYS SKULLTULAMAN WAS ‘ERE!” I nod quickly, ready to run away. “BUH BYE NOW!” And thank God he’s gone. “Zacky, why do you have such fucked up people harassing me in this godforsaken place?” Zacky: I feel like it? I dunno. As i walked into the castle town, i realised that stupid green dress the writer made me wear was gone. Replaced by a leather coat over all black. In my hands were two metal things that if i pulled the hanging bit, they shot people. -cue Matrix style shooting and stuff- I panted slightly as I finished, looking about at my handy work. Meli flew out and he jaw dropped, “Justin you fucktard, now you've killed everyone”. I look down and I’m back in that fucking dress again, causing me to shake my fist, “Damn you Zacky” Zacky: Serves you right! Now we’re off to see the Princess. The wonderful Princess of Pittsburgh.