We are all stars

Slowly standing up, Justin leaned himself forward, feeling the stretch in the back of his legs. He had just spent the past hour on his knees framing canvases for Adrienne. He was tired. Last night was filled with waking up from terrible nightmares. Justin was sure he must have screamed out loud during one of them. However, Adrienne was a deep sleeper; nothing seemed to ever wake her up. At least one of us slept well last night… Stifling a yawn, he wanders back up the stairs to the kitchen. He needed coffee. “Shit,” he mutters when he realizes that the pot is empty and there is none left in the bag. He didn’t want to go out. Not today.. maybe tomorrow? Frowning, he goes back into his bedroom. He hated feeling like this. I was doing so well yesterday.. why not now?… The worst thing about it however, was that Justin wondered if Ethan still loved him. Probably not. The whole situation confused him. If Ethan loved him so much, then why did he hurt him? Because I was his madness… Sitting on his bed, he feels like crying, remembering how angry Ethan was… I just don’t understand how this happened… A phone rings down the hall, but Justin chooses to ignore it. He didn’t feel like talking. maybe I should go out… get some air, clear my head… The closet looked so far away to him, come on, Justin… you can do it. Willing himself to get up, Justin goes for his coat. I’ll just go to the café down the block and pick up a bag of coffee beans… I’ll just buy a bag and then go home… maybe I’ll buy a cup for myself?..no, that means I’d have to wait for it… shit…. Well, we’ll see.. we’ll see.. the first step is to get out of this fuckin’ room. Glancing in front of the mirror, he stops to check his reflection. The bruise on his cheek was finally beginning to fade. Thank God for that. He hated the way people would look at him in class, as if they wanted to ask him what happened but were afraid to ask. Biting his lip, he forces himself to return down the stairs and head out the door.

I did it. I’m outside. It wasn’t as cold as it had been for the past few days. Justin found himself staring up at the sky for a few moments before walking out onto the sidewalk. It was a beautiful day. The café is only about a block away. Careful to avoid making eye contact with anyone, Justin hurried towards his destination. “Oh my God, Justin?!" Justin gasps in surprise and looks up to find Emmett walking towards him while pulling someone along side of him to catch up. “Justin! Oh my God, how are you?!” His smile slowly begins to fade as he nears Justin and sees the bruise on his cheek, “Sweetheart, what happened?!” Justin pauses, shit, then quickly recovers, "I fell off a ladder.." "A ladder?! Darling, what on earth were you doing on a ladder?" Justin forces a smile, "I was putting some art up at the gallery where I work.. and I fell," laughing, he adds, "It was pretty embarrassing." Emmett is concerned, "Your school could have been held liable if something terrible happened to you! Don't they have safer --" Justin cuts him off, "No, no, I don't work at the gallery on campus anymore.. I work someplace else." Emmett is about to ask where, when Justin quickly changes the topic, "So who is your friend?" Emmett grins widely, "This, is Travis... the love of my life!" Travis, who had been standing silently beside Emmett this whole time, now begins to blush, extending his hand to shake Justin's, "Nice to meet you." Justin smiles, "Likewise." He had to admit, Travis was incredibly good looking. He must be the Calvin Klein model... “Isn’t he great?!” Emmett excitedly exclaims. Justin laughs while Travis blushes a bit more before commenting to Emmett, “We’re going to be late if we don’t start to leave now…” Emmett nods, explaining, “Travis has a shoot today; can you believe it? Right here in Pittsburgh. Imagine the irony.” Justin purses his lip, listening to Emmett continue, “We just came back from Paris last night… I can’t believe I’m not exhausted!” Justin smiles, glancing back at Travis, “Well it was nice to meet you and good luck with the shoot today.” Emmett interjects, “Why don’t you come along?” Biting his lip, Justin takes a step back, “No…I can’t… that’s okay…” Travis smiles, “I think that’s a great idea, Emmett. You can both continue to catch up without feeling rushed for time.” Emmett grins, quickly putting one arm around Justin’s shoulder and leading him to join their walk, “It will be so much fun! Justin, you have to hear what happened to us when we stopped in Monaco… it’s sooo funny!!” Justin begins to laugh, maybe a few hours at a photo shoot wouldn’t be so bad. He had always liked Emmett. I guess he liked me too… Smiling, he follows their quick pace towards a taxi. This could be fun.

---------- later --------------

“Good, you’re here!” announces the man behind the camera. Justin aged him at about forty something. Travis smiles, “Hi, Brett. You remember, Emmett?” Brett smiles, nodding, “Hi, Emmett.” Travis gestures towards Justin, “And this is an old friend of his, Justin.” Justin smiles, “Hi, it’s nice to meet you.” Travis smiles warmly, and Justin is relieved that he makes no reference to the bruise though it’s rather obvious that it’s there. Travis spots Lydian, the make-up artist. Kissing Emmett lightly on the lips, he whispers, “I’ll be back soon.” Emmett’s cheeks blushes red as he returns the kiss, smiling, “I’ll be right here waiting…” Justin looks away, finding himself blushing as well. They were beyond cute together. Once Travis leaves to get his make up applied, Justin comments to Emmett, “You guys are adorable.” Emmett laughs, “Disgustingly so, I’m sure.” Justin laughs as well, sitting down on one of the sofas. It was a nice set. . “I’m glad we bumped into each other,” Justin found himself admitting. Emmett nods, patting his hand, “We should get together more often.” Justin smiles softly, agreeing. Looking back towards the set, he asks, "So how have you been?" It was a stupid question, but Justin knew someone had to say it. Emmett sighs, leaning back against the couch, "Lovely. And you?" Laughing, Justin shrugs, "Okay, I guess." Emmett becomes serious for a moment, “Did you go and see a doctor?” Justin stops, “What?” and then realizes he’s talking about the bruise, “It isn’t a big deal. I just fell… like I said before, it was actually pretty funny.” Emmett doesn’t seem convinced, but decides to drop it for the moment, “Can I tell you a secret?” he asks, his voice bubbling with sudden new excitement. Justin sits up, interested, “Of course.” Emmett leans in closer to Justin, whispering, "I've decided to start my own clothing line!" Justin's jaw drops, "Really? Oh my God, that is so cool! Emmett, I'm so happy for you!" Emmett nods, clapping, "I am too! I already made some designs... I can't wait to show them off! Travis introduced me to Calvin a few weeks ago, and he had me meet with Betsy who is such a character, let me tell you! But anyway, Betsy hooked me up with Tony, who has been incredibly helpful in getting my line together.. I might actually be ready to launch it by the spring!" Justin is shocked, but incredibly happy for his friend, "That is so awesome! I'm so happy for you!" Emmett nods, grinning widely, “I’m so happy for me too!” Justin pulls him in for a hug, commenting, “You’ve always had the best sense of style, Em… I know you’ll be a great designer.” He smiles, looking back over at Travis. Travis is wearing nothing but a pair of CK boxers. Justin immediately looks away, not wanting Emmett to think that he was interested in his boyfriend. Emmett, noticing Justin’s reaction, teases, “Oh it’s okay, you can look. I know my boy is hot.” Justin laughs, shaking his head, knowing that he was already blushing. Emmett playfully nudges him, “Soo… how is your violinist?” Justin looks up at Emmett, and then away from his eyes, “We broke up.” Silence. Justin knew that Emmett was waiting for him for elaborate. What more can I really say? Emmett nods, “Can I ask you something?” He nods, looking back at his friend. “Did you really fall off a ladder?” Justin swallows hard, returning his gaze to the shoot, he whispers, “Don’t tell Brian, okay?” Emmett nods, taking Justin’s hand and squeezing it. Leaning in close, he whispers in Justin’s ear, “I’m proud of you.” Justin is surprised, “Of me?” Emmett nods, “Yes, of you.” Turning to face him, Justin is curious, “How come?” Smiling softly, he answers, “Because you left him.” “Oh.” Justin looks back down at his hands. “Justin, I know that must have been hard for you to do.” He nods, avoiding Emmett’s face as he pretends to be studying the sofa’s lining. Emmett sighs, playfully ruffling Justin’s blonde hair, “You deserved better.” Finally looking up, Justin quietly states, “But he loved me.” Emmett smiles sadly, “That’s not love, sweetie.” Finding it hard to swallow, Justin looks away again, reminding, “Just don’t tell Brian, okay?” Emmett nods, “I won’t.” Justin looks down at his feet. He didn’t know what to say. It was hard getting the words out. Emmett, who hasn’t let go of Justin’s hand, gives it another reassuring squeeze, “It’ll get better in time, Justin. It will.” Justin nods, unable to speak. “Justin, have you talked to anyone about this? I mean, really talked?” Justin shakes his head. No more shrinks, please God, no more doctors, no more shrinks, no more anything like that… Emmett pats his hand, “Maybe you should.” Forcing a smile, Justin glances over at Emmett. Drop it, Em. Thankfully, Brett ends the conversation for them by announcing to Travis, "That looked great! Go put on the black one." Emmett brightens, "Ooh, wardrobe change!" and starts to get up. Justin laughs, watching him leave towards the bathroom where Travis walked into.

It felt good to talk about it. Maybe a shrink wouldn't be such a bad idea... Leaning back against the sofa, he suddenly felt tired. A flash of light brings him back to attention. He's startled to find Brett standing there a few feet away with a Polaroid. He smiles, "So are you a model as well?" Justin laughs, "Uh... no." Watching the photo develop, Brett asks, "How come?" Amused, Justin honestly replies, "I never gave it much thought." Brett shrugs, casually commenting, "You should. You have a look." Justin can't help but burst out laughing, "A look?..I'm sorry, but that is the worst line I have ever heard." Brett arches his eyebrow, lifting his left hand to show a ring on his finger. Justin stops laughing, “Oh..” Smiling, he hands the photo of Justin to him, “Like I said, you have a look.” Justin looks down at the picture. “Thanks…” Brett returns to his camera, looking through the lens before going to fix one of the lights above the screen. "If you're interested, I might need you in a couple of days for a shoot." Justin laughs, "Are you serious?" He nods, still not laughing. Justin wondered if the man in front of him ever even broke a chuckle in his life. "An associate that I work closely with is doing a new ad campaign for Calvin Klein... he wants Travis to be solo on the majority of the ads, but for some others... depending on the magazine, he wants poses of Travis with somebody else, other models." Justin nods, glancing back down at the candid shot that Brett had taken of him. Brett continues, "Depending on the magazine genre, there is a different shot for each ad." He stops to look at Justin, "In my opinion, I think you would look great in the shoot geared for the gay market." "The gay market?" Justin wasn't sure if he had ever heard that term before. I think Brian called it something different... Brett nods, "Yes. So if you are interested. Let me know. It will save me time having to go through countless headshots." Justin smiles, pensive, "I don't know..," and then remembers, "I have bruises." Brett nods, "Like the one on your face?" Justin nods, just don't ask me how I got them, please don't ask me... Brett shrugs, "Make up can provide miracles. You'd be surprised. How bad are they?" Justin tries to make light of it, "They aren't pretty." Brett smiles, "I don't know of any bruises that are. Let me see." Hesitating, Justin slowly lifts up one side of his shirt. Brett frowns, taking a step closer. "Hmm.. Lydian? Come over here." Lydian puts down her water bottle and goes over to Brett and Justin. Seeing the bruises she immediately states, "Oh we can cover that up." Justin brings his shirt back down, not liking the fact that he suddenly felt like he was on display. Brett nods to Lydian before returning his gaze to Justin, “See? The invention of make-up is a beautiful thing.” Justin forces a smile, “I guess so.” Brett sighs, “Look, if it’s money, then I can assure you that this isn’t a TFP deal.” Justin looks up, confused, “A what?” “TFP: Time For Prints. This isn’t one of those. You’d be getting paid.” Justin nods, still thinking. What’s the big deal? I mean, it could actually be fun… plus I’ll be getting paid for it. “Think about it, Justin.”

Emmett then appears, “Think about what?” Turning to Emmett and Travis, Brett replies, “I was just telling Justin that I think he would be a great person to add with Travis for those shoots we were talking about earlier.” Justin looks away, becoming embarrassed. Emmett claps his hands, “What a fabulous idea!” Travis nods, “I think it would look nice.” Justin shifts in his seat. He wasn’t sure, what about the bruises? Travis smiles, looking over at Justin, “Justin, in my own opinion, I think it would be a good experience for you.” Justin studies Travis’ expression. Did Emmett tell him? He wasn’t sure. Brett checks his watch, “Not to pressure you or anything, Justin, but I will need to know by the end of today’s shoot.” Emmett slides next to Justin, “What is there to think about, Justin? Do it!… come on… it’ll be so much fun!” Justin watches Emmett, smiling, okay… “Alright… I guess I can try it…,” but then seriously says to Brett, “but I’ve never done this before, so don’t expect me to know what I’m supposed to be doing.” Finally, Brett laughs. Justin is surprised. He laughs! “Don’t worry, Justin. We won’t expect that from you.” Travis smiles at Justin, “It’ll be fun.” Justin smiles back, nodding. Yeah.. It will be fun. Emmett happily wraps his arms around Justin, cheering, "Yea!"