Brian has mastered the art of how to let go of Justin.  He's mastered it to a point he has it down to a science.  Knows exactly what to do to kill the pain.  Knows exactly how to loose himself without Justin there.

The first time he learned to let go of Justin was the night so many years ago that Brian made Justin cry.  The day that Brian told him he was just a trick and watched as Justin sat in his mothers car crying before pulling away.  He knew he should have thrown the trick out but he couldn't.  Couldn't bear to think that a teenage boy, boy could tear down his walls.  So he let Justin go and went back.  He fucked and fucked and fucked until the pain of letting the blonde go melted away into orgasm after orgasm.

The second time he let go was when Jennifer asked him to stay away after the bashing.  So he did and in the process drowned himself in alcohol and more fucking.  

The third time was when the fiddler came into their lives.  Fuck, he should have just been more open, more of something to Justin.  Yet he let him walk out of the club that night without so much as a word.  And that night let Justin go through fucking, alcohol and drugs.   

Then Cody came along with his promises and words to Justin about vegence and heroism followed by Brett Keller and the fucking movie.  Then he had to let Justin go because Justin wanted to be let go.  Time and time again he let Justin go without so much as a single tear shed because he was Brian Kinney and Brian Kinney sure as hell didn't cry, especially not over a guy.  So he just grinned and beared it, immersing himself in the Peter Pan act.  

Until finally he realized that even Peter Pan eventually grows up and becomes a man.  So he too grew up and thought finally his and Justins life together was forever.  That was before New York came into the picture.  

Now Brian had to let Justin go, maybe for a while or maybe forever.  Somehow this time letting go didn't seem so easy as it did before.  Because he wasn't Peter Pan any more and his Neverland in Bablyon had been blown to bits.  

This time Brian wasn't going to let Justin go.  He was just going to let New York borrow him for however long it needed the younger man.  But this time he was going to fight when New York had finished with Justin.  No, this time he wasn't letting go of Justin.