Here's the second part I hope you all are liking the way it's goingso far.
One More Way To Go
Don't Close Your Eyes Part Two
Brian's POV:
He's right. I know he's right and if I'm honest with myself I knew
eventually it would come down to me spilling my guts to him if I wanted him
in my life. But shit how do I tell him everything that's here? How do I let
him know everything that I want?
"What do you want me to say Justin?" I feel the fight running out of me and
I'm a bit scared that what I have to say won't be enough.
"I just want the truth Brian," he says softly as if the fight is running out
of him as well. "That's all I've ever wanted." I nod my head in
understanding and go to sit next to him on the bed.
"When it comes to you I have found that I block so much out," he gives me a
curious look but I keep going. "I would just keep telling myself that I
didn't need you in my life," I look down to the duvet for this next part.
"That I didn't want you in my life, and it seemed to be working. somewhat.
Even if there was this strange feeling in the pit of stomach that couldn't
quite figure out. I just figured if I ignored it long enough it'd go away.
That is until a year went by with no word from you. Because even though I
kept telling myself that I didn't want you I still knew that you were one of
the most important people in my life and I wanted to see you, and in some
way I knew you loved me so I figured you'd want to see me as well. So I
waited and waited but there was still nothing."
"You didn't know I was here?" he asks confused and I look to him and see the
confusion on his face right before I see the realization hit him. "Oh I
see."
"I'm Brian Kinney Justin, and Brian Kinney doesn't ask about anyone," I say
standing up and running a hand through my hair. "Especially not about the
twink that wasn't supposed to mean anything to me." I watch as he accepts
that part and hope he got the whole supposed to thing then keep going. "But
one day I just couldn't take it anymore and I went to see Deb. She told me
that you'd moved here and everything about your father and I was so fucking
pissed at you Justin I couldn't see straight."
"I did what I had to do Brian," he says softly.
"I know you did but, I just couldn't help the anger and it wasn't only at
you it was at myself as well," I say turning away from him. I can't believe
I am saying all of this. "But what could I do? You were already gone and I
figured you'd have to come back eventually. If for no other reason than to
visit Gus, but then that night I went to see Gus and found out he was with
you."
"I didn't think you'd be mad."
"I wasn't mad at all about Gus being with you, as a matter of fact it was
quite the opposite," he scrunches up his eyebrows. "I was so glad that you
were keeping in contact with everyone. Especially Gus cause that meant that you were still tied to Pittsburgh." I take a deep breath. "And me." I look
to him again and show him just how much I mean what I am saying and I see the tears in his eyes so I go back to him and sit with him on the bed giving
him a light kiss on the mouth before I quickly pull back. I have to finish
this before I lose my nerve.
"Then I saw you at Babylon, and all that anger came back and I just wanted
to take you and shake some sense into you," I was so angry that night I
didn't know what to do to make all of it right. "so I took you back to the
loft to try to make everything right again, not that I knew what I was
doing, and my anger wasn't making any of it any easier, so naturally I
reverted to my usual way of handling everything."
"Sex," he says with a nod of understanding.
"Yeah but when that didn't work, I don't know I just lost my cool and these
things just started to pour out of mouth," I furrow my brow because I still
don't understand why I can't help it sometimes when it comes to him. "Things
that I didn't and never meant but couldn't stop myself from saying," I watch
a tear run down his cheek and I wipe it with my thumb. "I wanted you to stay
Justin that much I knew but I couldn't figure out how to make it happen
without giving anything away."
"I was so angry at you after that night," I nod my head 'cause how could he
not be, I said so pretty awful things to him. "But I can understand now that
you were just lashing out."
"When you left again I started telling myself that, that's what was best
that I didn't need you and it was alright I guess. The feeling in the pit of
stomach came back in full force but I kept to my routine even if it felt off
I kept to it and then the cancer came and the next thing I knew. there you
were. Banging the loft door down and I was yet again angry."
"I couldn't not be there Brian, I just couldn't keep myself away." he says
almost imploringly and I smile.
"I know that now but I couldn't see that then," I give another quick kiss
cause I can't help myself. "But having you there with me was so hard 'cause
it started to remind me of all the reasons I loved having you there in the
first place. It reminded me of how much I meant it when I said that I wanted
to come home to you," another tear falls and I wipe it away again with my
thumb. "But of course I couldn't tell you that and I couldn't even tell
myself that so I denied it and in the process pushed you away even harder.
Which also meant that those horrible things started to pour out of my mouth
again." he gives me a snort at that. "I know but I swear I didn't mean any of them I was just incapable of stopping myself."
"Okay maybe I can understand that but what about after we had sex that time?
Everything seemed to be gong fine and then all the sudden there went that
switch and I felt like the rug got pulled out from under me." I knew this
was coming as well.
"You calling your boyfriend and hiding me wasn't my thing so I lashed out,"
I say trying to sound nonchalant but not really knowing if I'm succeeding
with the small smile that comes over him.
"You idiot," he says shoving me a bit on the shoulder. "That wasn't my
boyfriend that was my Dean!" Huh?
"Huh?"
"I made a very big mistake in sleeping with my Dean at Dartmouth," I give
him a skewed look. "Don't look at me like that he was hot, believe it or
not," he says with a smug smile. "but anyways that's not the point the point
is, is that he wouldn't let it go after that. So I was faced with constantly
being called into his office for every reason under the sun and when I asked
for the time off to come and be with you he wouldn't let it go that it was a
family emergency. So finally it came down to either me going back or him
kicking me out of school suffice it to say I took the latter."
"You fucking did what?!" oh my god! I stand up and start pacing.
"Oh yeah I told him to shove it up his ass and it felt so fucking good," I
see a huge smile on his face and I just want to smack it off of him. "it was
like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders Bri, you have no idea."
"You were almost done with everything and you just walked away because of
me?" I practically yell but he doesn't seem phased. "How could you do
something so stupid?"
"First of all it wasn't all because of you," he says calmly but sternly and
I scoff at the idea. "Were you a contributing factor? Yes of course because
I love you idiot I was not about to let you through that without me there by
your side doing whatever I could to make it easier. Even though you were
making it extremely difficult on my part I didn't care I wasn't leaving
until you were better."
"I would've been fine," I say defiantly.
"I'm sure you would've," he says calming down a bit. "But besides you there was the fact that I constantly had this guy on my ass and not in a good way,
he was everywhere always in my business and pushing me for more and so many
other things that I just finally had enough," he sounds exhausted about the
whole situation. "Plus I already had a very successful business and an art
career that was starting to come alive. I was already successful without the
degree." he's being so nonchalant about all of this.
"You shouldn't have given up."
"It's done Brian," he says calmly. "And I don't regret any of it. So just
stop." he reaches out to me and I grab his hand giving it just the slightest
of squeezes.
"Well then I guess that explains that time," I say trying to let it go, but
I know I will never completely let it go. "But could you explain to me why
you hid away for over a year after you left?" I really need to know. I yanks
my hand a bit and so I sit with on the bed again.
"After I left I was so scared to even call you,"
"Why?"
"I just didn't know if you'd want me to after all of the things you said to
me over the time that I was there. It all just kept replaying in my head and
so I just couldn't bring myself to take that leap," okay that I can
understand, I know I made his time there pretty much a living hell. "But
then when I heard about your stupid ass idea of riding in the race I
couldn't care less about how you'd receive my call," I smile at that cause
he was so angry and I was so confused as to why he cared. "And of course you
were pissed and refused to listen to reason so I had to go and ride a
fucking bike to Pittsburgh."
"Well you didn't have to," I say 'cause he didn't. but he just gives me a
look that says of course I did you idiot, and of course I concede. "So when
I saw you there I started to think that you were just coming out of pity and
that of course pissed me off, and so I pushed yet again because not only was
I mad about the pity thing but also because you only popped up when it
suited your needs and then you'd disappear and the hole seemed to get bigger
every time and I just didn't know how much more I could take."
"I'm sorry I really didn't think of it that way," he sounds so sincere and
remorseful.
"How could you have known?" I ask and he shrugs.
"I don't know but I should've." I kiss him for that but this time he holds
my head in place with his hands and plays his tongue against my lips and I
just can't help wanting to taste him so I open for him and enjoy the taste
of him and the sensation of him running his tongue so slowly over every part
of my mouth. Before we get to lost I take his hands in mine and move them
over my heart as I stop kissing him and just rest my forehead against his to
give us time to calm down. When I open my eyes I find him staring straight
into mine and I can't help thinking that this isn't as bad as I thought it
would be.
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Justin's POV:
I'm beginning to think that we've been away from each other for so long over
misunderstandings and pride. I wish I could go back in time and tell him so
many things so that we hadn't lost all this time. It's been close to seven
years and when it's the one you love that you're away from each day feels
like a life time. With him telling me everything that he has I know I won't
be able to send him away from me again. I am probably the most selfish
person I know and I just can't stand the thought of losing him now that I
know he actually wants to be with me just as much as I want to be with him.
It would be impossible for me to live without him, and to tell you the truth
I don't think I'd have much to live for without him here with me. Pathetic
and sad, but so true.
"What are you thinking?" he asks and I smile. I can't help it he's not the
one to usually ask these questions or to talk these things out and here he
is doing it all for me.
"I'm thinking I'm going to have to keep this Brian Kinney around," I watch
his tongue make it's way to his cheek.
"Is that so?" he asks moving back just a bit, and I nod my head.
"Uh huh," I say moving the pizza to the far side and me over to make room
for him on the bed. "But that doesn't mean I am going to let you push me
around."
"I doubted it would," he climbs into the bed and puts his arm around me and
we scoot down into the duvet and I lye my head on his chest. "So does this
mean you're done fighting with me?"
"I don't think I'll ever be done fighting with," I say sincerely as I look
up into his eyes. "But that won't mean that I don't love you just as much as ever, if not more." he gives me a soft smile and places a kiss on my
forehead and then on my lips.
"I was hoping you'd say that," he says after he pulls back. "now let's eat
I'm fucking starving."
"I know I fucking hate hospital food."
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Brian's POV:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Two And A Half Months Later
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
As I am going through the final papers I have to sign I hear my cell ringing
and I pick up my cell just as the first ring ends.
"Hey," I say noticing that my voice has taken a sweet tone and not really
caring in the least since I exactly who it is. "What's up?"
"Well I just got a call from Debbie," ah great. "Asking if I was coming down
for the Prop 14 dinner."
"I should've known she'd call you," I really should've but in the last
couple of months I haven't had really all that much time to sit around with
the family. I just barely heard about the dinner two days ago when I got
back from Hanover. I have been spending weeks at a time with him and that's
exactly where I'd rather be any ways.
"What the matter with her telling me?" he asks with a laugh.
"I guess nothing," I say without getting into it 'cause we have been doing
really great. "so are you coming down?"
"I'm thinking about it," he sounds so sexy. Shit I miss him I hope he
decides to come since I won't be able to get out there again for another
week and if he does then he'll have to come out either tomorrow or early the
next day.
"How are you feeling?" he doesn't need to be sitting on a long ass plane
ride if he's really not up for it.
"I'm actually doing pretty great," he says sounding surprised himself. "I even went into work yesterday for a while and I am sitting at my desk as we
speak."
"Impressive," I sign the last paper and set them aside so I can give him my
full attention.
"I thought so," 'Knock.Knock,' "But anyways would it be alright if I come,"
I look to the door and see non other than Michael. I definitely wasn't
expecting him. "And stay with you?"
"You better be staying with me," I say sternly because seriously what kind
of question is that? I wave Michael in and he seems unsure of himself which
I think is a great thing.
"I was hoping you'd say that," he says and I know he's smiling.
"Do you know when you'll be getting in?" I put my attention back to Justin
and grab a piece of paper to write down the information.
"I'm not going to be able to get in till after the fund raiser starts," he
says sounding a bit distracted. "This is going to have to be redone," now I
know why. "Sorry about that Bri."
"It's alright. But why so late?"
"Oh well I have two meetings that I need to get through before I can leave,"
he sounds a bit put out about the meeting. "And the last one I have put off
to many times to do it once again and it's not until late Friday. But my
flight leaves not long after that."
"So when do you get in then so I can pick you up?"
"You don't have to do that," he says brushing it off. "I'll just meet you at
the Hotel."
"I'm not going to the fund raiser," I say simply, and then there is silence
for a minute. "Justin?"
"Yeah, I'm here," he says quietly. "Why exactly are you not going?"
"You know I don't believe in all of that shit Justin," I say rubbing my
eyes.
"I know but I would think that you'd support the right for others to be able
to choose for themselves."
"I don't see why they'd want to be in such a situation,"
"It's not about that Brian, it's about the fact that people are trying to
tell us what we can and can't do," he's raising his voice now. "What we can,
and can't have. They are trying to control our lives and it's bullshit!"
"Sunshine I have the right not to believe in this shit and I don't."
"Whatever Brian do what you want," he says and I can tell he's about to hang
up on me so I quickly interject.
"You'll come to the loft when the fund raisers over?" there's silence and
I'm hoping I didn't completely fuck up the time we could spend together.
"We'll see," he says and I sigh, shit just can't be easy. "Listen I have to
go later."
"Later." I say quietly to a dead phone line. I set the phone back in the
cradle and sit back.
'Mmm,' shit that's right Michael, I look towards him and he's still standing
by the door and I motion for him to come further in and he comes to stand in
front of my desk.
"To what do I owe the pleasure?" I ask sarcastically because I haven't
talked to him or even seen him since the incident at Debbie's.
"We have a bit of a problem with the Hotel we were using for the fund
raiser," he says in a small voice but I just raise an eyebrow for him to
continue. "They won't let us use the ball room." now I know what he's
getting at but I want him to ask for it.
"And this has what to do with me?"
"I wanted to know if you'd let us use Babylon?" he mumbles looking to the
floor.
"Interesting," I say standing up and making my way to the liquor cart, and
pouring myself a small shot.
"Look we'd pay you." he seems to be getting mad.
"How much?" I ask turning to him.
"Ten thousand," that would be a nice little sum and I hate to give him any
reason to think it's for him but I don't need or want the money.
"No,"
"Brian we can't afford to pay any more." he says indignantly.
"I don't want the money," he looks surprised or maybe he's waiting to see
what the catch is. "Think of it as my contribution."
"So you'll let us use the club?" he seems to be in disbelief.
"I do believe that's what I just said," I say simply.
"Thank you," he still seems uncertain but I don't think he wants to test me
any further.
"Is there anything else?" I ask in a board tone.
"No, no that's it."
"Well in that case I need to get back to work." I say motioning for him to
leave already. He nods his head and without another word walks out of my
office and I'm happy to see him go.
I sit back behind my desk and think about Justin and what he said. He's
right that we need to stand up for getting all the rights that straights
have but shit why does it have to be about this shit? Fucking homo marriage?
It's all bullshit. Plus I didn't think that Justin really wanted to get
married. What am I supposed to do about that? Do I really want to lose him
over something like that? I mean shit it's just a stupid little piece of
paper. Would he really leave me over such a thing? I guess I'll just have to
talk to him about it when he gets down here.
~~~~~~~~~~
Friday Night
~~~~~~~~~~
I sit at my computer desk and I am trying really trying to get some work
done, but all I can think about is the fact that Justin should be at the
club by now. We've talked since our fight the other day but both times were
tense and I didn't like it one bit. I need to see him to make this better
and I know it's going to be a while before he gets here and it's driving me
crazy. I get up and turn on the radio, maybe this'll help take my mind off
of it. There's nothing great on so I start flipping through my CD's.
"We interrupt this program for this news break," hmm? "A bombing has been
reported at the club Babylon," Justin! Oh god, I have to get there. I grab
my keys and wallet and don't bother with anything else as I fly down the
stairs and jump in the Jeep. Please let him be okay, please anybody just let
him be okay. I flip open my phone and one for his cell.
"Come on Jus pick up," I say with a quiver in my voice. "Pick up!" just then
his voice mail picks up and I slam it shut, and take a deep breath trying to
regroup but not succeeding in the least before I flip my phone open again
and hit one. I weave my through the traffic honking my horn whenever someone
is in my way. I flip the phone closed again with an aggravated sigh when the
voicemail picks up again. I wanna throw the damn thing out the window but I
can't lose this piece that could get through to him. As I pull up close to
the club I get stopped because of all the emergency vehicles so slam the
Jeep in park and jump out. I start running through the crowds of people
trying to look for Justin at the same time but I'm not seeing him, I am
however seeing the damage that this bomb caused and it's making me sick to
think of all these people in there when it went off and most of all I am
thinking of Justin being stuck inside. I see Jennifer out the corner of my
eye, and I make a bee line for her.
"Jennifer!" I yell and when I get to her I check her over quickly. "Are you
okay?"
"I'm fine," she says as she cries. "Justin. he's still in there."
"Don't worry I'll get him," I say sternly so she knows it'll be okay. It has
to be. She nods as she puts her head against a young mans shoulder. I don't
waist anymore time as I push my way through a larger crowd around the door.
When suddenly I feel someone grab me by the arm and yank me back. I swing
around and come face to face with a very big fireman.
"You can't go in there sir," he says looking a bit sad.
"I own this building so I can and I am going in there," I say yanking my arm
free and running in before he can stop me again. I almost immediately stop
in my tracks though from the site before me. There are people lying all over
the floor. Some conscious, some not. I am hoping that they are all okay
though as I watch the E.M.T.'s work on them. I slowly make my way around
them and the ruble and the fallen beams and I see in front of me Emmett.
"Emmett," I say a bit loudly as I grab his shoulders, but he winces from the
contact and I immediately let him go. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah just a bit sore," he says with another wince.
"Have you seen Justin?" I know I sound rushed and panicked but I can't begin
to help it. He gives me a strange look that makes my stomach drop but he
hasn't answered me. "Emmett!"
"No," he finally says with a shake of his head. "I haven't."
"Damn it!" I yell turning from him and spotting Ted in the corner crotched
over another person and god please don't let Justin be hurt. "Ted!" I yell
and he turns to me with a sad look, and my stomach drops again. I rush to
him and as he moves a bit I can see that it's not Justin.
"Brian,"
"What the fuck happened?" he shakes his head and looks back to the guy on
the floor, who looks to be okay.
"I don't know?" he says confused.
"Have you seen Justin?" I need to see him. I need to know he's okay. Please
let him be okay. If anything's happened to him.
"I haven't," he says sadly as he looks to me again. I stand up and look
around the room again but I still don't see him.
"Fuck!" I go to the other end of the room where I start making my way
towards the back a bit and I see a pale hand sticking out from under a long
board. "Justin!" I just know it's him. God damn it! I rush over and start to
lift the board off of him and I see his face as I throw the board to the
side. "Oh god, oh god. please."
"Justin?” I say softly as I wipe his face a bit. "Justin?" I can feel the tears starting to make their way down my face and I watch as they land on
his face, making tracks through the smut all over him. "Please Justin, you
can't do this to me. Not again." I lean down and kiss his forehead, then his
mouth and when I pull back I see the most beautiful site in this whole world
him looking at me.
"I'm not going anywhere Bri," he says softly as he reaches up and touches my
face.
"Ah Justin," I say kissing him over and over all over his face. I place my
forehead against his. "I was so scared, I thought I lost you."
"I'm okay, just help me up," he says and so I do taking him into my arms
once he's on his feet.
"I tried to call your cell, but you didn't answer," I say trying not cry. "I
just kept on thinking. what if I lose him? What if I never get to see him
again?"
"It's okay, I'm okay." he whispers into my ear. I can feel myself shaking,
as he holds me tighter. I pull back just a bit so I can look him in the eye
as I say the words I know are true now. The words I can't wait for him to
hear. The words I want him to know I mean more than anything else in the
world right now.
"I love you," I say softly with every bit of feeling that I have for him. I
feel his grip tighten on me and I watch the tears roll from his eyes but I
watch the sunshine smile take over his face and it feels so good to know why
it's there. "I love you,"
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Justin's POV:
"I love you." he's saying it, and he's not drunk and he's not cumming. He
actually loves me.
"I love you too," I say and stand on my impieties so I kiss him. There is a
spark flashing over head and that seems to break our little bubble and we
finally pull away.
We start to make our way out and I feel completely weak so most of my weight
is on Brian and the site in here is making me want to puke. So many people.
I can feel the tars start to fall again but this time it's for the people in
this building. I am still standing, barely scathed but a lot of people
weren't so lucky. I feel Brian tighten his grip around me as we pass a white
sheet and all I want to do is hide away in his chest but I don't. we keep
walking and soon we are down on the street filled with people. Brian takes
me to my mother and she just about squeezes the life out of me and the next
thing I know Debbie is there taking me from my mom and into her death
squeeze. I start to wiggle my way out of her grasp and I feel Brian's arms
come around me and pull me away from her.
"Is everyone okay?" I ask almost to scared for the answer.
"Everyone's accounted for and other than some scratches fine." she says as
she wipes some more smut off of my face.
"Thank god," I hear Brian say as he puts his arms around my shoulders and
pulls me into him. I put my arms around his waist and bury my face in his
chest then. "Deb you should start rounding everyone up and tell them to get
home."
"Alright, you two going to be okay?"
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Brian's POV:
I look down at Justin just as he looks up to me and I know we'll be more
than okay.
"We'll be fine,"
"Okay get some sleep and we'll talk tomorrow." it's not a question it's an
order so we both just nod our heads.
"Justin?" Jennifer asks after Deb walks away and we both turn towards her.
"Are you sure you're okay sweety?"
"I'm fine mom, I swear." after he reassures her she gives him a peck and she
even gives me a peck which is more than surprising. We shake her boyfriends
hand and they leave us be.
"Let's get you home," I say and turn him towards where I parked the Jeep.
"That sounds nice," he says sounding exhausted.
"Tell me the truth how are you really feeling?"
"I hurt but obviously I can still walk so."
"Where are your pills?" he's definitely going to need them.
"In my bag at the coat check," he sounds a bit defeated at the thought and
he starts to turn around but I stop him.
"I'll get them after I get you to the Jeep," I hear him sigh in relief
before he starts to make his way again slowly but surely. When I get him
settled into the Jeep I give him a quick kiss on the lips before I quickly
get back to the club shove my way through the people again and into the
club. I rifle through the mess in the coat room and finally find Justin's bags in the back. Underneath some coats. I quickly grab them up and make my
way back to the Jeep. When I get there I find Justin actually asleep in the
passenger seat and so I quietly put the bags in the back and get into my
seat. I make the short drive back to the loft without breaking any laws I
might add. Unfortunately when I wake Justin up to take him upstairs he wakes
in quite a bit of pain. So I decide to go ahead and pick him up and carry
him. He pushes the codes and I only have to put him down when I open and
close the gate both times. I do manage to open the loft door with him in my
arms though and then safely get him into bed. I turn out the lights get him
to take his pills and then get into my side and he immediately rolls into my
arms. I can feel him shaking a bit and I know he's just now probably letting
everything wash over him.
"It's okay Jus," I say rubbing his back and kissing his forehead.
"I know, it's crazy but." he looks up to me and I wipe away his tears. "I
just keep on seeing this big shining light and then these things were flying
and then I was and then there was nothing, and I was just so scared."
"It's not crazy," I say truthfully and he nods his head. I run my hand
through his hair even though there's all kinds of stuff hanging off and in
there. I don't care I'm just so happy he's here with me. "You should try and
get some sleep."
"You'll stay with me?"
"Of course," I say with a smile leaning down and giving him a kiss. "I'm not
going anywhere." he gives me a small smile before he tightens his grip on me
and lye's his head back on my chest. I keep running my hand through his hair
and eventually he relaxes under my touch. "I love you."
"I love you too." he says quietly as he squeezes me one more time.
He never did get to sleep but we stayed like that the entire night until the
early morning when I had to go back down to the club to try and figure out
the mess that was left behind.
"It shouldn't be that bad to get everything back up and running." I cut Ted
off with a wave of my arm and think about everything's that's happened in
the last few hours and I can't even bring myself to think of reopening the
club again.
"Just sell it Ted," I say quietly.
"What?" he asks almost exasperated.
"Sell. It." I say much slower. He gives a semi nod and then I turn and
leave. I don't need this anymore. What I need is to be back in bed with the
man I love. I smile at the fact that over night I seemed to have turned into
a complete lesbian, but it just doesn't seem to mean all that much to me
anymore. If I would've lost him last night I don't think I could've ever
recovered from it. Now though it's almost like I have second chance to make
things right, and I am just not willing to let that pass. I plan to make the
best of my life with Justin.
OMWTGOMWTGOMWTGOMWTGOMWTGOMWTGOMWTGOMWTGOMWTGO
Justin's POV:
'Knock.Knock,' I hear from the bed and I very slowly get up off the bed
biting down on my lips, to keep the scream from coming out. Shit why
couldn't they have just came later when Brian was here? Whoever is at the
door I really hate them right about now. I grab the partition when I get to
it and take a few deep breathes trying my best not to lose it and make my
way down the stairs, then to the table and then the kitchen counter and
stools before I take another deep breath and get myself to the door. It
didn't take me as long as I thought it would but the person on the other
side seems to think it took to long since they are now pounding on the door.
I pull it back some so I can see who it is and come face to face with
Michael. Oh great, just what I needed this morning. I see a gash across his
cheek and I know it has to feel horrible but the look on his face isn't
giving me much reason to feel real concern for him.
"Where's Brian?" he asks tersely.
"He went down to the club." I say and start to roll the door closed but he
stops with his hand and I look up to him again.
"I want you to stop playing with him Justin.' he demands.
"And I want to go back to bed," I say and without preamble I slam the door
closed. I am not going to keep playing these games with Michael. It's always
been useless. He never sees what's right in front of him, he only sees what
he wants and I'm sick and tired of trying to convince him of my feelings for
Brian and my dear god. intentions.
I make my way back to the bed cursing the fact that I did all that work for
fucking Michael and grab my pills and water at the night stand before I
climb in. I take them and then I hear my cell ringing. I grab it out of my
pants, and notice that it's Emmett calling.
"Hey Em," I say so happy to know he's okay. "How are you doing?"
"I'm okay baby," he says sounding rushed. "How are you?"
"I'm good," I say somewhat truthfully.
"I'm so glad," he says sounding relieved. "Listen honey I wanted to let you
know that I am going to go to Hanover."
"Hanover? But why?" I question.
"I.see I'm in love with Trent," I feel myself smile. "And when I got home
last night I called him and told him and he said he feels the same." I can
hear the smile in his voice and it makes me happy for my two of my most
loved friends.
"I am so happy for the both of you," I am practically giddy.
"I'm so glad,"
"Did you think I wouldn't be?" I say with a laugh.
"I don't know I was scared of it myself," hmmm.
"Because of the HIV?"
"I have to admit I was worried about that but only because I was worried I'd
lose him," he says sadly and I know he's telling the truth. "But also
because he's so much younger than I am, and just the simple fact that I
haven't felt about anybody the way I do about Trent. But when all of that
happened last night I realized that it could all be taken away from me
before I even have it, and I really want it. I want to be with him."
"Wow Em, I'm glad you decided to give it a shot. I think you two could be
really happy together,"
"I really think so too," I know he's got that goofy grin of his now.
"Just don't hurt him okay?" now this I am serious about.
"Oh honey you know me better than that." we talk for a few more minutes and
then he has to go to catch his plane. I sit back and start to think about my
life. Which Brian has just made completely full by saying three little
words. I can't believe it's true, let alone the fact that he said it. I am just so happy. Don't get me wrong I am so sad about the people who lost
their lives last night but at the same time I can't wait to really start
Brian and mines life. A real life together. I hear the door rolling back and
I am so happy Brian's back. I hated the fact that he had to go down there
all by himself. I really wanted to go but I just couldn't.
"Hey," he says coming around the partition with a bag in his hand and a
smile on his face which I return.
"Hey, that better be food," I say scooting up. He gives me a small laugh as
he climbs on his side and sets the bag down in front of me.
"Do you think I'm that stupid to come back here without food from the
diner?" he asks seriously then grabs my chin with his thumb and forefinger
bring me closer for a kiss.
"Mmm," I say pulling back and licking my lips. He taste like peppermint.
"How was everything?" I ask bringing myself out of a daze. I need to know.
"There were four death's," he rolls his lips inside his mouth and looks away
from me but I turn him back to me.
"It's going to be okay," I say giving him a kiss and then wrapping my arms
around his neck as he puts his around my waist and brings me flush against
him. He buries his face in my neck and I know this is hard for him in so
many ways.
"I'm selling the club," he says softly and I pull back surprised.
"You really want to do that?" he finally looks back to me and I can see the
hurt in his eyes.
"I can't imagine ever being in there again," he shakes his head. "I almost
lost you in there."
"But I'm fine Brian," I say kissing his forehead. "I'm right here," I say
again softly putting my hands against his cheeks. "I'm not going anywhere."
he nods his head and comes in close and kisses me. A slow long loving kiss.
"I love you," he says as he pulls back and I can't help but smile and give
him a peck.
"I love you too."
OMWTGOMWTGOMWTGOMWTGOMWTGOMWTGOMWTGOMWTGOMWTGO
Brian's POV:
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Two Days Later
~~~~~~~~~~~~
I sit in the muncher's house waiting for them to come out of the kitchen
with Michael by my side trying to get my attention.
"Would you leave it alone already Michael!" I say standing up.
"But they are going to move to fucking Canada Brian," he says standing up as
well.
"I know that Michael," I turn towards him and I can see the tears in his
eyes and I somewhat feel sorry for him. "Think about what this'll mean for
the kids."
"How could this be good?" he's yelling now.
"They will be in a place where their mothers are accepted," I say seriously
trying to get him to understand. "They'll be in a place where nobody will
care who their mothers fuck, or if the kids turn out to be gay. They'll be
accepted."
"But it's so far away," he says as a tear escapes.
"You both will be welcome anytime you want," Melanie says from behind me.
"See we can go whenever we want," I say softly and he nods his head
solemnly.
"I just can't imagine not seeing Jenny every day," he says biting his bottom
lip.
"What about you Brian?" Lindsey asks softly touching my shoulder and coming
to my side. "How do you feel about all of this?"
"I can understand why you guys want to move," I say with an understanding
smile. "And not that I completely like the idea," I watch them look at each
other skeptically. "I think it's a good one." Lindsey jumps in my arms and
Melanie comes over with a huge smile and punches me in the arm.
"Thank you Brian," Lindsey says in my ear and then pulls back.
"Don't thank me yet," I say turning back to Michael. "You still have one
more to go through." I can feel the tension in the room grow as we wait for
Michaels answer I can also feel the fact that Lindsey has stopped breathing.
"Any time I want?" he questions so much like a little kid.
"Yes of course," Melanie says coming up to Michael and squeezing his arm.
"We would never deny either of you or our kids that."
"Our kids need their fathers," Lindsey adds and I have to kiss her cheek for
that.
"Okay then," Michael finally says after a minute with a tear running down
his cheek.
"Oh thank you!" the girls both say at the same time as they take him in
their arms and kiss him all over his face.
~~~~~~~~~~~
An Hour Later
~~~~~~~~~~~
I pull back the loft door and see Justin lying on the couch watching
Farscape. I went out and bought all of the seasons because of that little
shit. He got me addicted to them. I close up the door and when I turn back
to him he's turning off the TV, then looking to me.
"So is everything okay?" he asks concerned because when the girls first
called they seemed so cryptic that it got me concerned.
"Everything's fine," I say with a small smile and make my way to him. I sit
myself by his hip on the edge of the couch and lean over to give him a kiss
which he eagerly accepts, we sit like that for a minute or two before I pull
back.
"If everything's fine why were they being so cryptic?" he asks almost
immediately.
"It was probably just because they were scared of what I'd have to say about
their plans,"
"Okay now you're being cryptic," he says annoyed and I smile.
"They wanted mine's and Michael's approval to move to Toronto Canada," I watch Justin's mouth drop open and it seems as though he's forgotten how to
breath. "Take a breathe."
"Well. what did you say?" he asks quickly.
"I said it sounded like a good idea," his eyes get huge now and I kiss him
on the lips because he looks so fucking cute.
"How could you," he says in disbelief.
"It's what's right for the muncher's and what's right for them is right for
Gus." I say simply cause it's the truth.
"And you're really okay with that?" he asks unsure. But I nod my head with a
small smile of knowing that it's the right thing to do. "Alright."
"Plus I have been doing some thinking," I think it's time to let him know
what I've been mulling over. "About opening up another Kinnetic's," he gives
me a curious look.
"And where would you open this other Kinnetic's?"
"I was thinking Hanover," he gives me a smirk that he is desperately trying
to control.
"Is that so?"
"Don't you think it's a good idea?" I ask with a smirk of my own.
"No," he says turning serious and I am beginning to think maybe I shouldn't
have assumed he'd be happy but then he smiles his sunshine smile. "I think
it's a perfect idea." he says finally and we both lean in to a passionate
kiss.