Lois and Carolyn, thanks for the beta...you’re the greatest!  

I would also like to thank everyone who previewed the chapters for me.
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Chapter 12 – A Necessary Meeting
Wednesday Evening…(Day 59)


Michael was sitting at the computer in the comic book store when the bell sounded over the door.  He looked up and broke into a big smile when he saw Brian standing by the door.

Michael started to quickly leave his seat, wanting to rush over to him.  Brian stopped him with a look.  Like a penitent child, Michael returned to his seat to wait for Brian to come over and kiss him, as usual.

Brian slowly walked into the store; then he closed and locked the door.  He turned the sign on the front door to “Closed”.  Then he walked over to the counter and sat down on one of the available stools, a good distance from Michael.

“I’ve been calling you for weeks now.  You haven’t been returning my calls,” Michael started to whine immediately.

Brian pinched his nose and shook his head, trying to drown out the sound.  

“I’ve been really busy, Mikey.  You know that.  I’m sure they told you that when you called the Kinnetik office; I was out of town on business,” Brian tried to calmly explain.

“Business…sure?  Wasn’t Justin with you?”  Michael asked with an accusatory tone to his question.

Brian ran his hands through his hair and sighed.  He realized that Michael would never understand that he and Justin were now business partners, as well as legal life partners.  He realized all that Michael saw when he thought of Justin, was someone who simply illustrated his comic book.  Michael could so easily forget that Justin was an accomplished artist in his own right, and now also Brian’s working partner as well.  A lot of things changed almost two weeks ago.

Realizing that Michael was waiting for answer, Brian finally easily admitted nonchalantly, “Yeah,” he said with a shrug.  The added shrug said so much.

Michael’s disappointment was unmistakable. “So then what are you doing here?” he finally asked.

“I heard about you and Ben.  I just came to see how you were doing.  I’m sorry that things didn’t work out between you two.”

“Well you should be!”  Michael quickly accused with some anger in his voice.  “It’s all your fault!  If you and Boy Wonder hadn’t legalized things, none of this would have happened!” he began to rant.

Brian realized immediately that everything Michael was saying was so absurd that it didn’t even require a response.  Once again, someone was blaming him for the problems in their life, and he didn’t like it one bit.  

But this was Michael, and they had a history together, so he tried to let it slide.  “Are you going to tell me what happened between you and Ben?” Brian asked instead.

Michael had clearly been waiting for this opportunity.  

“He left me, Brian,” he said sadly, letting the tears finally flow down his cheeks.  “Ben left me because he said that I was so focused on trying to have a future with you that I lost sight of everything in the present with him.  How could he do this to me?  We made a commitment!  We got married,” he continued, professing through his tears.

“And is he right?” Brian quietly asked, without moving from his seat.  He definitely did not want to deal with Michael’s histrionics at this point.

“I guess,” Michael finally admitted with a series of sniffles, as he started to wipe away his tears with the back of his hand.  “I promised that I would always be there for him.   And I have been!   I did what I needed to do to be there for him all the time.  I love Ben.  You know that, but I guess I just needed something to hold onto.”

“And what you chose to hold onto was the lie a future with me?”

“I believed in time…” Michael tried to argue as a means to justify his actions.

“But what did I tell you?” Brian sternly insisted, trying with all his might to control his anger.  He still couldn’t believe that Michael was holding onto the past and using him in this way.

“You told me that we would NEVER be a couple, but I thought that one day you would change your mind.”

“Why on earth would you think that?  You know that I mean what I say!”

“Once Gus and Justin came along you seemed to change everything.  So I figured in time you would change your mind about a future with me too.”

Brian now understood that for Michael, there was only ONE kind of love. Michael didn’t understand that there were things that he would do for Gus and Justin that he would never consider doing for anyone else.  Brian understood about different feelings for different people…he had learned that there are different kinds of love.   

And Brian understood that somehow through the years no one had shown Michael that there were different kinds of love in the world.  He realized that it often takes someone special to show you that difference.  Justin and Gus had been his guides to this realization.  Ben had obviously failed to help Michael understand this difference. 

“You do understand now that that’s never going to happen.  We’ll always be friends.  I’ll always love you.  But we…you and me…we’re never going to be a couple!  I thought that you understood that a long time ago!  Michael, you’ve got to let the childhood fantasy go!” Brian said sternly, for he was exhausted from having to repeat this lifetime mantra, one more time.  This time he hoped that he was clearly heard.

“You’ve made that abundantly clear.”

“Have I Mikey?  We can’t keep doing this!”

“We won’t…I got it this time,” Michael professed. “Really!”

“Good! I’m glad that’s settled,” Brian said with a smile.

“Since we’re never going to be a couple, are you here to help me get Ben back?” Michael asked hopefully, sure that with Brian’s help, everything was going to quickly get back to normal. 

“Excuse me?” Brian asked in disbelief.

“You’ve got to help me get Ben back!” Michael insisted again.

“I can’t help you with that, Mikey!  What on earth made you think that I could?”

Michael couldn’t believe his ears.   Brian had always taken care of these things before.  He had fixed things when there had been problems with David.  He had helped him find the courage to originally fight for Ben.  Why did anything have to change now, when Michael needed him the most to fix this mess? 

And when he did finally understand what Brian was saying to him, Michael fired back.
“Then, what am I supposed to do?  How am I supposed to get him back?  I don’t want to be alone!  You have Boy Wonder!  What about me?” he immediately shouted.

“If you want Ben back, you’ll have to find some way to work things out with him.  In the meantime, you have to move forward…you just have to get through one day at a time.”
  
“I’m not as cold and heartless a bastard as you are…I can’t do that!” Michael fired back in anger.

Brian simply remained calm.  “Then I don’t know what to tell you.  I’m sorry that you’re so unhappy.” 

Michael accepted Brian’s tone of concern, even though the usual hugging and kissing and other signs of affection didn’t follow it.  Then once again, Michael’s anger flared again.

“Then why are you here?” Michael practically spat.  “If you didn’t come to help me get Ben back, then what do you want?” he added with resentment.

At this point, Brian was simply tempted to walk out of the store.  His days of taking shit from everyone for things that he had nothing to do with were over.  But Brian had a reason for this annoying visit with Michael, and he had no intentions of leaving until his appointed rounds were completed.

“I came to show you this,” Brian said, showing Michael the paper and the article about the return of Divina Devore to the Kit Kat Club.

“Where did you get this?”

“It’s a newspaper, Mikey,” Brian said, stating the obvious.  “They’re all over town.  Ted and Emmett showed it to me during lunch yesterday.  I simply thought that you should know about this.”

“Why should I care about some old drag queen?” Michael lied.

“Indeed.  It’s just that this old drag queen is someone you once thought was your father,” Brian quietly reminded him.

“That was a long time ago,” Michael tried, in vain, to challenge.

“It’s just that you’ve often said that you were half Italian and half drag queen, so I thought…”

“You thought that I believed that this old drag queen could possibly be my father,” Michael protested with a laugh.  “That would mean that my mother had been lying to me all my life.  You know who my father is, he’s John Michael Novotny, Lieutenant in the US Army…” 

“Please don’t repeat that litany to me!” Brian said, holding up his hands to block out the words.  “I’ve heard that story so much for the last 20 years…even I know the words by heart,” he added.

“Sorry.”

“I just wanted to be sure that you were okay with things.  Hunter seemed to think that you were upset.”

“Upset!  Why the fuck should I be upset?” Michael began to rant again.

“Something about you finding out some new information…”Brian relayed calmly.

“What new information could I possibly find?” Michael said with anger in his voice.

Brian didn’t say anything.  He just sat there and silently counted, ‘5…4…3…2…1…’

“You mean like that John Michael Novotny had been stationed in Viet Nam for more than a year before he was killed in action?  You mean like the fact that if he was over there, then there is no way that he could be my father?  You mean like that my mother has been lying to me all these years?  You mean like the fact that Hunter and I found proof on the Internet?  Is that the kind of information you’re asking about?” Michael volunteered right on cue.

“Well, as long as you aren’t upset?” Brian said sarcastically.

“I don’t know what to do with everything that I found out.  My mother and I haven’t been talking since the last family dinner when she told me I was being an asshole about you and Justin.”

“Well?”

“She’s my mother, Brian; she’s supposed to take my side in things.  And now this….”

“So what are you going to do?”

“I don’t know.”

“Mikey, you’re going to have to talk to Debbie if you ever want to know the truth. She’s the only one who has the answers that you’re looking for.”

“I’m not sure that my mother knows what the word TRUTH actually means at this point.”

“That’s a bit harsh.  Debbie has always put a lot of stock in the truth.  She’s just been a bit overprotective where you’re concerned.  You’ve got to admit that she’s always been there for you…fuck, for us all.  But you were always her little man, so if she lied to you, I’m sure she felt she had good reasons,” Brian tried to explain.

“Maybe.”

“So what are you going to do?”

“I want to get Ben back.  That’s all I care about.  But he won’t answer my calls…he won’t even talk to me.”

“Give him some time, Mikey.  He’s got a lot to deal with.”

“What does he have to deal with?  He’s not alone…Hunter is living with him.”

“But things are okay between you and the littlest hustler, aren’t they?”

“Yes, I saw Ben, and we agreed that Hunter shouldn’t be forced to choose sides.  I’m just afraid that he already has…after all, he’s chosen to live with Ben.”

“Ben and Hunter have always been extremely close.  Don’t overreact, or you could lose both of them.”

“Maybe… It’s just that nothing is working out for me.  Everyone seems to have gone on with their lives, and I’m still stuck back at square one.  I thought that I had everything.  Now I feel like I have nothing.”

“This isn’t a race, Michael.  You just have to find your own way to move forward again.  That’s what life is all about.”

“And how do I do that?”

“Talk to Debbie for starters.”

“What good will that do?”

“You’ll never know until you talk to her.”

“It’s just that I can’t believe …” Michael said sadly.

“I’m hearing self pity,” Brian reminded him.  “You know that makes my dick soft.  And we can’t have that now, can we?” he added with a smile.  

Michael managed a little smile back at the familiarity of the moment.  Then he managed a deep sigh.

Brian finally stood up.   “Look I have to go.  I’ve got a long drive home…Justin’s waiting, and I’m already late. Think about what I’ve said!”

Michael just stared at his friend in silence, waiting once again for Brian to come over and give him his usual hug and kiss.  Once again this didn’t happen, and Michael could feel the sense of loss.

And with that Brian turned and started to leave the store.

As he was about to leave, Brian turned back around.  He walked over to Michael and gave him a hug.  “Think about what I’ve said,” Brian repeated.

And then Brian left, leaving Michael alone with his thoughts.