Hey All, Thanks for the warm welcome back and for all the feedback! You guys know how much that means to me. I hope you enjoy this chapter. Sorry for the delay. The muse was a little quiet and then I had some schedule issues. Anyway, thanks again for all the feedback. Once again a big Thanks for LOIS my Amazing Beta and to Elsa for giving me a home!! (Blush I forgot to add this additional thank you.) To Mariana for her suggestion to have Justin confront Conway. I can't say I hadn't considered it myself but she certainly confirmed the need for it in my mind. Thanks Mariana for keeping me open to possibilities! Hugs to all! Your mouse Chapter 12 MAURICE LACROIX Smooth granite counters, hard and cold, greeted Justin as he entered John Conway’s office. The office captured the essences of the capitalist, cold and hard. Justin found himself wondering how someone was warm and welcoming as Kate could ever have come from such a man. He hesitated for a moment as the fleeting sensation that he was committing professional suicide rushed over him. He took a deep breath focusing on Kate. He knew the risks involved in confronting Conway, but also realized that his friend’s happiness depended on someone standing up to the man and forcing him to see what he was clearly refusing to recognize. Justin cleared his throat just as the blond behind the receptionist’s desk glanced up, recognizing him immediately. “Justin.” Her smile widened. Justin felt something inside of him relax. It felt good to finally be settled enough to the point where he wasn’t constantly a stranger in every surrounding. “Hi Jane.” He leaned against the counter. “I need to see Mr. Conway.” Jane furrowed her brow. “Did you have an appointment?” She glanced at her flat screen. “No.” Justin intercepted, before her eyes finished running through the day’s calendar. “I was just hoping for five minutes.” She pursed her lips, debating whether today was a day Mr. Conway would be open to a quick work-in on his schedule. “Five minutes?” She questioned. “I promise. Ten at the most.” Justin knew it could very well turn into either less than five or more than an hour, but kept that information to himself. Jane pushed a button hidden from Justin’s line of sight, then spoke softly into her mouth piece. A moment later she met his gaze. “Mr. Conway will see you now.” She offered. “Thanks.” Justin flashed her one of his brightest smile in spite of the growing knot of apprehension in his stomach. Brian would tell him to not get involved. Hell, Brian had warned him not to get involved, yet here he was, definitely involved. “Justin!” John Conway greeted him as he entered the expansive office. The view of the city was mesmerizing, causing Justin to lose his focus for a moment. “Mr. Conway.” He extended his hand. They shook hands and then made their way toward a couch on the far side of the room. “Nice view huh?” John offered as he noticed Justin’s gaze coming back to it time and again. “Very nice.” Justin agreed as he took his seat. He cleared his throat, the knot working its way up into his mouth. He glanced at John then back to the window. “So what brings you here?” John asked, taking the chair across from where Justin was sitting. “Can I get you drink?” The older man gestured to an expansive bar. Justin couldn’t help but smile knowing Brian would definitely be impressed by the quality and quantity involved. He’d have to remember to describe it to him later. “Justin?” Conway’s voice pulled him back from his thoughts. Justin laughed softly embarrassed by his distraction. “You wanted to talk to me about something?” Conway ventured glancing at his watch. “Someone.” Justin affirmed. “Kate actually. ” Justin announced without hesitation. “Kate.” John repeated thoughtfully. “What about Kate?” There was a tone there that assured Justin that he was definitely on thin ice but over the years Justin had become quite good at navigating dangerous territory. “She’s unhappy Mr. Conway.” Justin offered. “John.” The older man corrected. “Unhappy?” John furrowed his brow. Justin cleared his throat, wishing he didn’t feel as though he was building a case for a rigged jury. “Yes,” His gaze held the older man’s as he spoke.” Kate is very unhappy. She wants to call off her engagement but—“ “Is this about Patrick?” John abruptly stood, throwing Justin off center for a moment. He recovered quickly and pressed on. “Yes and no.” Justin shrugged. “Yes. in that he’s the reason she’s unhappy, but no because Kate’s your daughter and she should be your chief concern. This isn’t about Patrick. This is about-” “Should?” John’s tone was as ridged as his body. Justin was taken aback but the sudden shift in temperament. He watched as Conway took a deep breath, obviously struggling with emotion. A moment later when he continued, his voice was measured with restraint. “Justin, I like you. I really do like you. I think you are full of promise and potential but I don’t want nor do I need you to lecture me on my daughter’s state of mind.” He made his point clearly. “You are a bright talented young man that my daughter cares a great deal about but don’t let your personal ties to this family blur your professional ones.” Justin knew he could get up at that moment and walk out and his career would still be intact. All it would take is a simple ‘Yes Sir, Mr. Conway, I’m sure you do care for your daughter. I’m sorry for interfering.” Unfortunately, Justin wasn’t about to walk away that easily. Taking a deep breath, Justin rose in order to meet Conway’s gaze. “I don’t think this is about blurring any ties. I’m not here to lecture you. I’m here because I care about your daughter and her happiness is important.” His voice was strong, obviously surprising the older man. “I think you need me to tell you because you refuse to hear the truth from her.” “Justin—“ The warning was clear. “I know you are a very powerful man. You have wealth, this company, connections, and a great view,” Justin gestured toward the windows. “but I also know that you are a father. You want what is best for your daughter and Patrick simply isn’t it.” Justin continued. “He’s gay Mr. Conway. Surely you’ve notice that.” “What would make you say that? How do you –“ “I know. I’d know before you’d know. Gay men know these things.” Justin offered. John Conway was silent for a long moment before he spoke. “Justin, you know what I think?” He paused but not long enough for the blond to respond. “I think you’re attracted to Patrick.” Justin opened his mouth to protest but Conway silenced him with a finger. “I’m not criticizing you. I’m merely offering something that I think you should consider. Patrick is young, handsome, wealthy, and it’s quite natural that a young man such as yourself would be attracted to him, but I think you’re confusing your desires with the reality of the situation. I also think you’re getting Kate to buy into this delusion.” Justin wasn’t sure which he found more offensive, the words or the fatherly tone Conway had used to deliver them. “I’m involved with someone. I have a partner.” He held up his hand revealing the ring. John considered that for a moment then smirked and walked back toward his desk. “Something amusing?” Justin asked. He had already committed professional suicide, why stop now? “No.” John replied. “But I have gay friends Justin. Gay men are seldom monogamous.” “That’s not true. You don’t have a clue—“ “Funny, that’s what I was just thinking. You don’t have a clue what’s best for my daughter.” John interrupted. “Now I appreciate that you care for Kate, but you really don’t know her very well. She tends to trust the judgment of other’s over her own. I’m sure a few comments dropped by you eluding to the fact that you question Patrick’s sexual orientation would naturally lead to Kate questioning Patrick’s commitment to her-—“ “That’s not fair. She brought it up to me—“ Justin defended as Conway kept his focus on the papers littering his desk. The older man looked up his eyes hard with conviction. “Well the subject is now closed. I don’t wish to nor do I intend to ever discuss this with you again.” John warned. Justin wasn’t sure where to go at the moment. Was he being dismissed? “Mr. Conway, I feel you owe me an apology.” Justin stood his ground. Conway huffed a small laugh. “You come into my office and dive into my personal business yet somehow I’m the one owing apologies?” Conway glared. “Rich.” He laughed but there was no humor in it. “Well you may not feel you owe me anything but you owe my partner an apology.” Justin warned. John narrowed his eyes. “I’m sorry if I offended your partner.” There was no sincerity in it. “Well you I’m sure you didn’t offend him, but it did offended me.” He shook his head. “You know if you want your daughter trapped in a loveless marriage, if you stereotype people based on what you’ve read in magazines, if you think I was out of line, as Kate’s friend, to appeal on her behalf; then quite frankly you aren’t the man I thought you were and I don’t see any reason for us to work together any longer.” He couldn’t believe he was saying it himself and yet, it was the first time in a long time he felt completely whole. John Conway seemed stunned by this turn of events. “You’d throw this chance of a lifetime, your future, away because of some remark that was made related to gay marriage?” He seemed more confused than angry. “This isn’t my once in a lifetime opportunity. This is merely a job opportunity. My lifetime opportunity, my future, is in Pittsburgh.” He turned and headed for the door, surprised his legs were moving given how stiff he felt. Once Justin reached the door he turned back adding, “You’re blowing it with your daughter. I can’t stop what you’re doing but I don’t have to stand by and watch it happen. She deserves better than Patrick and if this is your attitude, she deserves better than you.” Justin paused, wondering if the man had anything he wanted to add. Conway remained silent. “She told you all of this herself and you refused to listen.” Justin cleared his throat. “I’ll keep the engagement in Chicago. It’s too late to cancel. After that, we’re done. Agree?” “Agreed.” John Conway felt the wrongness of it but was too prideful to admit it. Instead, he watched as his best artistic find of the new millennium walked out of his door. ………………. “You want to take table four’s order to them Sweetie or do you just expect them to come and get it from the window themselves?” Deb sarcastically quipped as Jansen started moving to the pick up window. “I didn’t notice.” He mumbled. “That’s because you keep staring at the door. Brian’s not coming in for lunch today. He’s picking up his son and Lindsay at the airport.” She grabbed her rag and wiped down the counter. “I’m not watching for Brian.” Jansen argued as he moved past her with the cooling plates of food. “Well it’s a good thing because he’s off the market.” Deb reminded. “He’s off the market.” Jansen mocked softly as he delivered the food. He knew that. Brian had made that point clear but it didn’t mean that Jansen could suddenly stop thinking about him, looking for him. He turned back to the next table, checking their drinks. “Jansen.” The blond turned and found an older man standing by the counter. Jansen stiffened before pasting a huge smile on his face. “Harold, what are you doing here?” Jansen hoped that his words sounded more welcoming than he felt. “I thought I told you I’d be home at 5.” “I know, I know.” The older man blushed. “But I missed you. I got off work early today and hoped maybe you could to. I thought maybe we could have a little dinner then work it off later.” The older man’s arms encircled Jansen’s waist pulling him closer. Jansen glanced around him embarrassed by the display. “I can’t get off.” He extricated himself. “Well we both know that’s not true.” The older man winked. Jansen suppressed the urge to wipe the smug look off the older man’s face. After all, what Harold lacked in looks he made up for in money. “Let me check.” Jansen offered as he moved back behind the counter. He noted Deb’s narrowed eyes and realized that she’d witnessed the entire scene. “Can I get off early?” “What game are you playing?” She asked, ignoring his question. “What are you talking about?” Jansen asked, forcing his face to remain neutral. “You think I don’t know what you’re up to? You think every guy in here doesn’t get it? Well, except for the one standing in the middle of the aisle waiting patiently for you to return.” She continued to stare through him. “Harold’s good to me. I like him.” Jansen offered weakly. Deb took in the man’s appearance. He was in his fifties and showing every day of it. Grey hair, slight gut, tired clothes, this wasn’t the kind of man that hot young twinks were naturally attracted to. “He must have a load of cash.” She glanced back at Jansen. “And absofuckingluting no clue.” “Can I have off?” Jansen asked, clearly irritated by her insinuation. “No.” She spat. “In fact you have to work a double. Kiki isn’t coming in tonight.” She turned and made her way back to her tables. Jansen watched her go, resenting her know- it-all attitude. He took a deep breath then returned to Harold. “I’m sorry, she said no.” He shrugged. “You know Jansen, I told you that you didn’t have to work here. I’d be more than happy to –“ “I know, I know.” Jansen smiled sweetly up at the older man. “I want to work. I’ll be by when I get off. Do you think you’ll still be up?” He asked. “For you? Of course.” Harold leaned down and kissed the younger man. Jansen allowed it. He watched as Harold left, grateful that Brian was at the airport instead of the diner. ….. “So you want to tell me why you decided to come early?” Brian asked as he placed Gus on the ground. “I just thought it would be nice to have more time with my parents before the surgery.” Lindsay offered. Brian raised an eyebrow, indicating his doubt in her explanation, but said nothing. “Look!” Gus pulled out a postcard that was obviously the interior of FAO Swartz. “Justin sent it to me. He also sent me a Buzz Bear.” ”A Buzz Bear?” Brian took the card and skimmed it. “Oh Brian,” Lindsay began. “Surely you’ve heard of them. They’re the hottest things right now.” Brian smiled as he read his lover’s message to Gus. It was short but sweet. “Never head of them.” Brian admitted. “Mine’s the construction bear.” Gus offered. “I like that. I like when they build the buildings and use the diggers.” Brian was amazed how much his son had grown in the last few months. Gus was changing so fast. He felt an ache as he realized he was missing it. “Baggage Claim A,” Lindsay announced. Brian returned the card to Gus as they waited. “You’ll have to teach me about these Buzz Bears.” He announced. “If you have time.” “Yeah.” Gus smiled up at his Father. “And we can maybe see some diggers.” “Diggers.” Brian nodded. “They have some near my office. I think they are putting in a mall down there. We’ll go see them.” Brian felt relieved that he was having this time with Gus. He couldn’t imagine how much harder it was going be to connect with his boy as the years raced past and the gap grew wider between them. Brian was losing his son more and more with each passing day and one day, unless he fought now, Gus would be lost to him entirely. “Brian?” Lindsay’s voice pulled him from his thoughts. “Were you listening?” ”Sorry.” He cleared his throat. “Those are our bags.” She pointed as five huge cases entered the conveyor. Brian glanced at the luggage then back at Lindsay. He pushed off the wall and began pulling the cases from the conveyor. Each one seemed heavier than the next. “What did you pack? Everything?” He glanced back and from the expression on Lindsay’s face, he realized that she had. …...... Someone was coughing. Michael sunk down deeper into his seat in the theater as Rage flew onto the big screen. Again, someone behind him coughed. “Shhh.” He threw over his shoulder as he tried to concentrate on the show. Again, the coughing. Michael was about to turn around again when he realized Rage had been canceled. He wasn’t in a theater. He was in his bed. He wasn’t awake. He was asleep, but still someone was coughing. Ben. Sitting up, suddenly Michael was wide awake as he reached over and felt Ben’s forehead. He was burning up. Michael shook Ben’s shoulder. “Ben? I need to get you some medicine or something. Wake up.” He urged but his partner remained silent except for the coughing. Michael jumped out of bed and was met by Hunter who was standing in the doorway. ”What’s wrong? Who’s sick?” He rubbed his eyes. “I heard someone coughing.” As if on cue, Ben coughed again. It was then that Hunter realized how hard Michael was struggling to remain calm. “I can’t wake him.” Michael offered as he moved to the phone to call Ben’s doctor. He had a new immunologist. This one specialized in the treatment of HIV. “Ben!” Hunter called loudly. Ben shifted under the blankets, lifting both Michael and Hunter’s hopes. “Go get some water. He needs water.” Michael announced. “and a cool rag.” Hunter moved as Michael waited for the service to answer. Michael felt oddly calm at that moment as he stared over at his lover lying in their bed. He’d always wondered when it would start. It hung over him from time to time. It usually occurred at odd moments when they’d be doing normal everyday things. Michael would suddenly feel a sense of foreboding and realize that time was ticking down, whether they acknowledged it or not. “Michael?” Dr. Dennison’s voice came over the line. “Oh Dr. Dennison, it’s Ben, he’s coughing and has a terrible fever.” Michael rushed. “Deep breath Michael. You can’t help him if you panic.” Michael followed the man’s advice, taking two deep breaths before continuing. “He’s not really responding.” Michael offered, fighting down a wave of fear. “Okay, sounds like he’s picked up that respiratory virus that been going around. Call 911 and get an ambulance to take him to St. Andrews. I’ll meet you there.” Michael nodded as he tried not to think about what it meant; that he was having to call an ambulance. “Michael,” Dr. Dennison began as if reading the younger man’s mind. “He has a fever. He isn’t the only person who’s been hit hard by this virus. Non-HIV individuals have also wound up arriving in ambulances this week. Let’s not get ahead of ourselves okay? His last viral count was very low.” Michael grabbed onto the words being offered like a drowning man to a life raft. “What did he say?” Hunter asked as he arrived with the glass of water and wash cloth in hand. “We have to call an ambulance. It’s just a respiratory infection.” Michael offered, hoping he sounded less frightened than he felt. “Is he going to die?” Hunter asked his eyes fixed on the form in the bed. “No.” Michael declared. “Now go get dressed. We have to go with him.” Hunter nodded and handed Michael the cloth and glass before disappearing down the hallway. Michael dialed the number and waited. “Yes, this is an emergency.” He replied, still holding fast to the hope that it was only an isolated incident and not a sign of what was to come. …….... Kate stepped off the lift and noticed Justin’s door was ajar. She paused for a moment. hearing the blonde’s voice from within. She couldn’t tell if Justin was alone or not and didn’t want to interrupt. The sound of something crashing against the wall convinced her to barge in anyway. “Justin?” She was greeted to the view of boxes packed around the studio. “What are you…. you went to my father didn’t you?” She asked, her voice full of concern. “Yes.” Justin confessed. “And it didn’t go as I had expected.” “That Mother Fucker!” She spat. “It was my choice.” Justin quickly jumped in. “He said something that pissed me off and I decided I didn’t want to work with him.” Kate laid her packages by the door and moved across the room to her friend. “Justin, do you have any idea how hard it is to get your foot in the door in the art scene?” She reached out placing her hand on his arm. “My agent just called me to explain that fact in excruciating detail.” Justin mumbled weakly. Conviction was a bitch at times. “But I can’t work for someone that has the attitude that your father does where gay relationships are concerned—“ “Hey,” She shook his arm gently until he looked up at her. “Forest, this is a tree, get past it.” She smiled sweetly. He shrugged her hand off of his arm. Kate persisted. “No really Justin, don’t blow me off. You are missing the boat here. So what if Dad is an asshole or hurt your feelings?” “My feelings?” Justin shot back clearly exasperated. “He didn’t hurt my feelings. I stopped having my feelings hurt in my teens. He offended my ---“ “Feelings?” She replied. Justin stared at her for a moment before allowing a small smile to find its way onto his lips. “You’re overreacting. He no doubt blew off your concern then managed to—“ “He thinks my concern stems from some attraction I feel for Patrick.” Justin offered, startling Kate. To his surprise she burst into laughter. “What’s so funny?” “Oh my gosh, how clueless.” She shook her head. “Oh Justin, come on, that’s funny. He think that you are infatuated and that you are trying to convince me that Patrick is gay so that what?” She paused trying not to burst into another fit of giggles. “He thinks that you are trying to convince me that Patrick is gay so that I’ll dump him and he’ll be available for you? Man, that’s so ridiculous I can’t even go there.” She moved away, taking a seat on the small sofa. “My Dad has officially lost his mind.” “He has lost it. It’s ridiculous for reasons too numerous to list but most of all because I’m involved with someone. I love someone.” Justin defended. “I know, I know.” Kate assured him as her laughter died away. “Dad sees what he wants to see and luckily for you, he likes to see your work.” She added. “Well I told him after the Chicago show I’m gone.” Justin admitted glancing around the wreckage of his studio. “Well, that can be fixed. I’ll call him.” She offered softly watching the blond as the weight of all he’d just sacrificed came to rest. “No, I don’t want you fixing things for me.” Justin murmured softly suddenly felt young and stupid. Had he overreacted? Should he have swallowed his pride and continued working with Conway? He knew what Brian would say but he hadn’t wanted to tell Brian any of this just yet. He wanted to feel more confident about his decision before he tried to convince anyone else that it had been the right course. “Are you hungry?” Kate asked eyeing her packages. “Patrick will be home soon and I got some great Chinese cooling by the door. Come eat.” She offered. Justin sighed. He was hungry. He hadn’t had anything to eat all day. “Patrick huh?” He raised an eyebrow as he turned back to face her. “Yep,” Kate rose. “Why not play out Dad’s theory on him and let’s see where it ends up.” She offered. Justin narrowed his eyes, wondering what she had in mind. Kate didn’t stick around to clarify as she moved back to the door and retrieved her bags. “Come on.” She gestured then disappeared back through the door. Justin stared at the door for a moment longer then let his gaze linger over the half filled boxes littering the floor. This was his studio. He loved it. He really did. The thought of walking away was far more difficult than he’d expected. He felt conflicted though. How could he make peace with himself if he knew that the man who was enabling his success held his relationship with Brian in such contempt? He was suddenly reminded of the PIFA disciplinary board and their demand that he apologize to Stockwell in order to remain in the program. He’d sacrificed everything then. It hadn’t been easy but the choice had been clear. He couldn’t apologize. Somehow this felt different. Justin felt the weight of his cell phone in his pocket. He could call Brian. He could ask the older man for his advice but Justin knew it wasn’t necessary. Brian would tell him, as he had so many times, that the best way to get even was to succeed, but somehow that had always sounded hollow to the blond. It was a slippery slope and Justin found himself wondering how any queer ever kept his footing. “Are you coming?” Kate’s voice cut through his thoughts as he tossed a roll of packing tape on top of the nearest box. He’d call Brian after dinner. Maybe Brian’s response would surprise him, either way though, Justin knew he’d feel a lot better about everything once he heard his lover’s voice.