Authors Notes: excuse any errors - Lois is away until the first of May - she will beta this chapter and I'll repost it when she is finished - meanwhile here it is for those who can't wait

Misty Moonlight 13 

“We’re here Brian,” Justin spoke softly not wanting to startle the older man. Brian opened his eyes, his mind still confused about what he was going to do about everything that had happened. He was going to need more time. Apparently, if Antiqua could be believed, time wasn’t an issue. His head was aching again. He’d refused the pain medication that had been offered before he left the hospital knowing that it would affect his balance and make it worse. He’d wait until he reached his sanctuary. Now they were here. The next step was going to be getting up to the loft and into his bed. Fuck the family and friends who were coming over. Let Marc, Justin and Gus deal with them.

Brian, with Justin and Gus at his side slowly made his way toward the loft. The elevator reached the top floor and he stepped out with his two helpers right in front of Michael.

“Holy fuck” Michael said, his face went pale. “I’m really sorry Brian. Shit just look at you, you’re, you’re.”

“Fucking ugly” Brian finished though no one could understand what he said except Justin.

“You are not Brian.” Justin said. He wrapped his arm around Brian’s waist.

“What did he say, what did he say?” Michael’s voice was unnaturally loud verging on hysteria.

“You aren’t supposed to be here yet.” Justin said quietly. “He opened the door with Brian’s keys.

Marc just shook his head and walked into the loft. This was going to be a long day. 

Gus looked at Michael. “You hurt my dad’s feelings Uncle Mikey, I think you should go and come back when everyone is here.” His voice was quiet and showed his disappointment in his uncle.

“What are you doing here kid?” Michael asked trying to divert some attention to Justin.

“I live here.” Justin and Gus led Brian to his bedroom. “I’m going to help Brian to bed. I really do wish you’d go and come back later. Brian needs some time to rest.”

“Justin is my dad’s boyfriend.” Gus volunteered. “He knows how to look after Dad.”

“Brian doesn’t have a boyfriend.” Michael began. “I’m his best friend. I’d know if he did.”

Brian turned carefully and faced Michael. He sighed deeply; his eyes were full of pain and longing for what had been. Leaning slightly into Justin he turned his head and pressed his unresponsive lips against Justin’s in a parody of kiss, but it was the best he could do. Justin beamed his understanding into the hazel eyes and said quietly. “You don’t know everything Michael.”

Brian turned away and carefully climbed the few steps up to his room. He let himself fall onto his bed careful that his head hit the down filled pillows where he lay exhausted staring up at the ceiling. “Shut the door please” he said to Justin who went to the door. 

“Gus, your dad is going to lay down for awhile, if we fall asleep, make sure we’re awake in two hours please.”

“Sure Justin. Grandpa Marc and I were going to get stuff ready for everyone. Auntie Em said he’d help too.”

“Marc, can we have this little get together at your place?” Justin asked. “That way if Brian isn’t up to seeing anyone, he can hide out here.”

“I was going to suggest that Justin. I think for right now the only feelings that we need concern ourselves with are Brian’s. If the others don’t like it then too bad.” This last was said with a glare in Michael’s direction. Michael looked shamefaced.

“It’s not my fault. I was surprised. No one told me.” Michael tried to excuse himself.

Justin looked at the other man, shook his head and shut the door to the bedroom. Brian lay on the bed looking defeated with his eyes shut. “Do you want me to help you get undressed?” Justin asked quietly.

“I’m not a fucking invalid” Brian growled. “And you are not fucking sleeping with me and you are not my fucking boyfriend.”

“But you kissed me” the blond protested his voice low.

“I was just showing Mikey that he didn’t know everything. Don’t read anything into it.” He turned his back to Justin. “Get the fuck away from me.” Brian pulled the extra pillow over his head. “Turn out the fucking light when you leave.”

“Apparently you have a new ‘word of the day’ Justin quipped. “Only those of low intelligence resort to profanity in everyday conversation. Now I know that isn’t true as far as your intelligence goes. Of course I have to make some exception for the fact your brain has just been abused. I would hope that you regain a more extensive descriptive vocabulary soon.”

“Fuck off” the words were muffled under the pillow as well as being garbled.

Justin removed Brian’s shoes and socks. He undid the man’s pants and unceremoniously pulled them off. Rolling him on his back he undid the other man’s shirt and began to remove it. Brian was unresisting through these administrations though he kept the pillow over his face. 

Justin left the bedroom long enough to get a bottle of water from the fridge and to give Gus a quick hug when he passed him. He whispered, “I’m going to give your dad his medication and then we’ll have a nap. Don’t pay any attention to him if he’s grouchy, Michael should have listened to you and Marc and stayed away.”

“I know Justin.” Gus looked sad. “Is dad going to be okay?”

“Sure he is, just give him time.” Justin headed back to the bedroom. Brian was exactly how he’d left him, flat on his back with his pillow over his face. Justin laughed. “Stop being a drama queen. I have your medication and some water. Sit your ass up you need to take it now.”

“Fuck off”

“I thought we established that your vocabulary needs to improve. I mean some ad man you are. ‘Buy my fucking soap or I’ll fucking be pissed.’ Somehow I don’t thing it’ll be one of the more popular campaigns.” Justin giggled. “But who knows, stranger things have happened.” He pulled the duvet out from under Brian roughly. Brian stuck his head out and glared at Justin.

Justin glared back, though his eyes danced with amusement which pissed Brian off even more. Wordlessly Justin held out the bottle of water. Brian took it. Without thinking he twisted the cap off and tried to drink spilling it down the front of him because of course he couldn’t make his mouth work properly. Justin handed him a towel without saying a word. He poured a spoonful of the liquid medication. “Brian, concentrate on what you’re doing. Head back a bit, here goes.” Justin placed the spoon in Brian’s partially open mouth and then touched his chin to close it while Brian attempted to swallow. Tears filled Brian’s eyes at the humiliation of everything that was happening and he lay back pulling the pillow over his face to hide from the world. 

Justin removed his clothing, all except his underwear. He was tired to the bone. Staying and watching over Brian had taken a toll on him thought he didn’t like to admit it. Turning the light out he lay on the bed covering the both of them with the duvet. Gently Justin removed the pillow from Brian’s face and in the darkened room he pulled the larger man toward him, cradling Brian’s head. Brian’s body was stiff and then he let his arm fall over Justin, his face turned into Justin’s chest and he cried the first of many tears for the situation that the fates had placed him in. And Justin cried too. He cried for the man he’d grown to love. He felt all of Brian’s pain and then some because there was nothing he could do to erase it.

They both fell asleep taking the comfort each could offer the other. Brian had the luxury of his pain medication to help him sleep. Justin had the resiliency of youth and the fact that he was right where he’d wanted to be for a long time, in Brian’s bed.
“Dad, Justin” Gus called gently from the now open door. “It’s almost time for everyone to get here. Grandpa Marc told them all to go to his place thought. Do you’ll think they’ll listen?”

Justin heard Gus, but he hated to open his eyes and he hated to give up the weight of Brian who still slept on him. “Who knows Gus, if Michael is anything to go by, then n they won’t listen.” Justin’s voice was a soft stage whisper. “We’ll be up in a few minutes.”

Gus smiled and slipped out the door, he’d let his dad and Justin sleep an extra hour, but he knew that Justin needed time to deal with his father so he had to wake them up.

Justin rubbed Brian’s arm and kissed his forehead. “I’m not getting up” Brian said into the pale and firm chest of the man who was holding him.” It was a pleasant feeling waking up with Justin holding him close. It made him feel safe and for a few minutes until he spoke he could almost imagine that he was Brian Kinney handsome stud of Liberty Avenue instead of a monstrous effigy of what he once had been.

“You don’t have to get up.” Justin said with another kiss. “You can stay in bed and hide for eternity if that’s what you want to do. I’ll be at your side.” He wiggled as if settling down for the long haul.

“I never asked you to.”

“That’s because you didn’t have to. I love you. I have before and I do again.” Justin all but purred his contentment into Brian’s ear. 

“Did Antiqua appear on my birthday?” Brian asked.

“She sent a message to Gus and I the day you were in surgery.”

“What did she say?” Brian wondered if she had confirmed her predictions. Justin was definitely here with him no matter how many times Brian thought it couldn’t be possible.

“The usual cryptic stuff that can have a zillion interpretations.” Justin knew what she’d said word for word, yet he didn’t want to tell Brian that he only a year with him. He wanted him to think it was forever. Maybe if the older man thought that, he’d give in and it would be forever.

Brian let it drop. He had too much to think about. “I stink.” He said as he sat up. He figured his eyes must look as bad as the rest of him. He hadn’t cried like that since he was a small child.

“I love the way you smell” Justin said honestly. “If you’re very careful you can have a shower, but I’ll have to help you wash your hair. You can’t get your stitches wet.”

“Why not, it isn’t as if it’ll kill me.” Brian’s tortured laugh made Justin shiver. “I’m fucking” he looked at Justin “pardon me, I’m darn well going to be alive for eternity. I don’t suppose it’s possible to even kill myself.”

“Well, a stake through the heart might do it, a la Buffy if you keep up the attitude.” Justin grinned. “Luckily I’m easy to get along with and can put up with your bull shit. And Brian, if you’d stop feeling sorry for yourself and remember what the doctor said. You won’t be like this forever. You need to have time to heal. And time for any nerve regeneration that might take place. It wouldn’t hurt either for you to do the exercises that you can do.”

“I’m not feeling sorry for myself.”

“Well you’re doing a really good imitation of ‘poor little me’ and it’s wearing thin.” Justin stood up and stretched. He held out his hand. “Now stop trying to pick a fight. Let’s go have a shower; I’ll wash your back. I’ll even trim your hair a bit. You can have your wonder stylist fix it up later.”

“I’m not going to fuck you.” 

“Who asked you too?” Justin huffed a laugh. “I want our first time together to be awesome and for that you need some stamina. Don’t forget, you are twelve years older than me and you always will be.” He giggled. “I can do old man jokes like forever.”

Brian rolled his eyes, but decided to leave well enough alone for now. He carefully began to walk toward the bathroom concentrating like he’d been taught to focus on a point and move toward it. He swayed occasionally, but managed to get inside the door without Justin’s help.

“I knew you could do it big guy.” Justin said from behind him. “You’re Brian Kinney after all. You can do anything.”

Brian smiled to himself at Justin’s words. The kid was a great cheerleader that’s for sure.

Showering with Justin was an experience that Brian wished he could take more advantage of. But Justin was right, he didn’t have any stamina. He felt as weak as a new born kitten and he had the problem with his balance. Brian kept his eyes averted from the mirror over the sink. He hadn’t had a really good look at the ruin that was his face. He knew that now wasn’t the time. He truly felt seeing the damage would completely break him at the moment despite Justin and Gus’ efforts to support him. 

Justin had Brian sit on the closed lid of the toilet while he did his best to trim up the wild look of the half shaven head. The closeness of the naked teen almost undid any good intentions that he might have had but Brian managed to get through it. “There you go, bad as new.” Justin said with satisfaction. He stood back and brushed away the stray hairs that clung to both of their bodies. “Maybe we should have another shower to rinse off.” He suggested.

“No” Brian was getting better at making that word understood. He had a feeling it was going to be used often. Without looking in the mirror, he made his way back to the bed. He looked toward the kitchen, he was hungry but didn’t know if he could get over there and actually make himself something for dinner let alone eat it without choking to death.

“I’ll make you something to eat” Justin said as he slipped on a pair of sweat pants and a tee shirt. “I thought maybe an omelet would be easy for you to handle”

“Don’t do that. Don’t read my mind. Don’t translate what I say. Don’t even hang around here.” Brian glared at Justin.

“I can’t help it if I know what you want. If you really thought about it instead of yourself for a few minutes, you’d know that you can read what I want and need too. It’s kind of like we’re tuned to each other. Do you think it’s like the vampire stories? You know, where the vampires that are all part of one group can ‘read’ each other?” Justin grinned at Brian and started to walk out of the bedroom. “Oh and by the way, where would you suggest I live considering I’m in another dimension from where my home is?” Justin headed for the kitchen where from the sounds he was making, Brian could tell he was preparing the omelet.

Sitting naked on the bed, his wet hair slowly drying, his head aching but not as bad as usual, Brian felt disoriented and surreal. A few days ago his life was somewhat in order. He’d determined what he was going to do about his health and accepted his fate. And now his life was shit, he was shit, from the top of his head to his feet. Justin was here from the other Pittsburgh being little Susie Sunshine in the kitchen. Gus was looking more worried than usual. Marc kept giving him these sad looks and now fucking Michael was all freaked out and had probably spread it all over Liberty Avenue about how butt ugly he was now. He felt a twinge of spasming pain in his left cheek muscle. That was odd, wasn’t the whole point of being paralyzed was no feeling? 

Brian touched his cheek. He could feel his fingers. He touched his lips, he could feel them too. Interesting, maybe he was going to survive this shit after all. He wanted to shout to Justin and tell him but stopped himself just in time. He’d forgotten he was supposed to be mad at the little shit. Coming over to his dimension and making him live forever like some kind of freak. Fucking Antiqua.

Brian stood up, he wasn’t dizzy. He moved his head back and forth. Nothing much happened. Very strange. 

Justin was busy in the kitchen. The omelet was almost finished. He’d brewed a fresh pot of coffee but wasn’t sure if it was okay for Brian to drink it. He might burn himself. Justin felt a tingling, Brian was close he turned around and there he was. “Fuck Brian, you scared me.” He gasped.
“Language Sunshine” Brian chided. His words were slurred but not nearly as bad as before.

Justin looked at him curiously. “You’re regenerating. I bet that’s part of the eternity thing. I mean surely we aren’t expected to go through eternity getting older. I mean geeze can you just imagine being like say 200 years old and looking the part. Gross.”

“You could be right.” Brian said as he sat at the counter. “I’m having an easier time walking too and my head doesn’t feel like there’s a dent in it.”

“Your hair still looks weird.” Justin offered.

“One thing about you Sunshine, you’ll never let me get to overconfident.” Brian laughed. He reached over and poured himself a mug of coffee and then one for Justin. “What do you take in your coffee? I don’t think you’ve ever said.” Brian asked.

“Cream and sugar.” Justin smiled. “I guess we never did cover coffee.” He placed a plate in front of Brian containing a perfect omelet, a piece of toast and some sliced tomato. “I hope you like this. We need to go grocery shopping.”

“We do, do we?” Brian raised his eyebrows questioning.

“There’s hardly anything here to eat.” Justin explained.

“Well, I have been away for a few days.” Brian gave a good imitation of a smirk. Justin laughed so he didn’t think it was one of his best. He took a careful sip of the coffee, pleased to feel the heat of the liquid in his mouth and on his tongue. He was getting the feeling back. He must be regenerating.

“Brian, are you going to go down to Marc’s with me later?” Justin asked as he took his place beside Brian at the counter.

“I might” Brian looked at Justin. “Is my face getting better?”

“Yeah, it is.” Justin admitted. 

“Then I will, but not for long. I feel like I could sleep for a week.” He turned to his omelet. After a few bites he put his fork down and turned back to Justin. “Justin, you can use the apartment on the second floor. Emmett has the bottom unit, the next one is empty and then there is Marc and myself on the top. Marc and I furnished the second floor unit to use for guests.”

“I thought I was going to stay with you?” Justin said. ‘fuck how was he going to get Brian to admit his feeling if he couldn’t live with him.’

“You thought wrong. For one thing you’re too young to be ‘with’ me and for another thing you are only seventeen, you need to finish school and live your life. Eternity is one hell of a long time.”

“Don’t you love me?” Justin’s eyes were smarting.

“What’s love Justin except another four letter word? Sure I have feelings for you, I mean who wouldn’t, you’re not bad looking and you’re smart. We’ve known each other a long time. In fact you’re probably one of my oldest friends. But this eternity shit – I don’t know about that. I mean even if it was true that somehow we were connected to each other umpteen dozen lives ago, that doesn’t mean we feel the same way now.”

“I do. I know I do.” Justin protested. And he did know. He knew deep down in his heart and he knew that Brian felt the same way but he was just too scared to admit it. “I don’t want to live by myself in your stupid apartment.” Justin stood up. He didn’t want Brian to see the emotion he was feeling. Suddenly the fact that he had left his home and his family came crashing down on him. It was one thing to give up everything he’d ever known if he had Brian in love with him and supporting him emotionally. But quite another to be just some inconvenience to the other man. And the other Justin was in ‘his’ room and living with ‘his’ family and using ‘his’ stuff.

“Justin come back here we need to talk about this.” Brian called after the blond’s retreating back.

Justin had found the door to Gus’ room and going inside he locked it behind him. He stood still, his back to the door desperately trying to regain his composure unaware of the tears that were flowing down his cheeks. It was only when Fluffy meowed from the end of the bed, did Justin give way to his feelings and he began to sob as he fell onto Gus’ bed. He gathered the cat close and buried his face in its fur not caring if he had an allergic reaction. All he knew was the cat purred with a comforting purr and seemed to understand Justin’s distress.

“Where’s Justin?” Gus asked his father when he came in the door. “We’re all ready downstairs and Grandpa Marc said to come and get you guys.” He looked at his father closely. “Hey, you’re getting better. I bet it’s because of the legend – I bet you’re regenerating on your own. I mean how else would you live forever?” He looked around. “Is Justin in the bathroom?”

“He took off into your room. I heard the door lock.” Brian sighed. This wasn’t going to go over very well, he could tell already by the clouds that were racing across Gus’ face.

“I suppose you told him that you didn’t love him.” Gus’ voice was quiet. He looked his father straight in the eye. “I know that you told Grandpa Marc that you couldn’t let yourself ever love anybody because you think you’ll mess up like your dad.”

“You shouldn’t eavesdrop” Brian turned away from hazel eyes that were shouting accusations.

“I don’t eavesdrop. You just talk loud and for some reason you think I’m deaf when I’m at the other end of the room watching TV.” He humphed, “it’s a common misconception that most adults have.” Gus walked over to his father. “Dad, I know you love Justin. I see how you look at him and I see what you’re like when it was time to visit with him. Dad, he gave up everything to be with you. Everything. It would be like me disappearing from your life. We love each other. Well Justin loves his parents and his little sister and his life in Pittsburgh and he gave it all up because he loves you more.”

“I never asked him too.” Brian looked stubborn, but he listened to what Gus was saying.

Just then there was knocking at the loft door. It opened and in poured everyone. Debbie and Vic were through first. Debbie ran over and pulled Brian into a bear hug and then kissed his cheek soundly. Michael, Ben and Emmett followed, and then Lindsay and Melanie. Finally Marc wandered in when he realized that everyone had bypassed his apartment and headed to Brian’s.

Like all big families there was lots of noise and laughter. Drinks were handed out and Emmett and Marc disappeared and came back again with plates of food. No one noticed that Justin wasn’t there for a number of reasons. Michael had dismissed him from his mind, Debbie, Vic, Ben and Emmett had heard about him from Michael and even knew him a bit from his occasional stops at the diner, but they had no idea he was about to be living in the loft, Lindsay and Melanie were too involved in themselves, Gus was kept busy answering the usual questions adults asked children and Brian, well Brian hadn’t forgotten the blond in Gus’ room. He just didn’t want to deal with him right now and everything he represented. 

The time wore on. Brian’s speech was improving minute by minute as his body rebuilt itself and therefore everyone dismissed Michael’s stories as the usual Michael queening out drama. For some reason when Justin slipped out of Gus’ room, it was like he was invisible. He looked around and everyone appeared engrossed with what they were doing. He shrugged into a jacket of Brian’s that he’d borrowed from a closet and slipped out the loft door that had been left partially open because of the coming and going between Marc’s place and Brian’s.

He took the stairs down to the entrance of the building never looking back, well maybe once when he thought he’d heard his name. Stepping out into the spring night Justin shivered with anticipation. He couldn’t force Brian to love him and maybe Brian was right, maybe this time they weren’t right for one another. Maybe all the years that they had been separated had worked the love from their systems. The ache deep inside of him told Justin that he loved the other man with all of his heart. But even a love as strong as his couldn’t make Brian Kinney fall in love with some blond kid who he’d known forever.

“So young one, you are disappearing into the night to wait out the year.” The voice came from the dark shadows in the alley next to the loft building.

Justin stopped walking and turned to look into the darkness. “Who’s there?” he asked.

“I see the love you have for your soul mate is as strong as ever and yet you are willing to leave his life – for what reason?” was the answer from the dark.

“I don’t know who you are, but what I do is my business.” Justin turned and began to walk away.

“What if I told you I could make him yours?”

“I’d tell you to leave Brian and I alone. I don’t want him if I have to trick him into loving me.” Justin’s chin went up as his pride asserted itself. He turned around at the sound of silk moving to see a woman dressed entirely in black folds of silk. Only her eyes showed and they glowed with an eerie green light. 

“Did I not give you six times six by one to let him come to his senses?” she sounded puzzled at the way things were going. It was something she hadn’t expected after all of this time.

“I just don’t think this is going to work. Maybe if I’d had another year to grow older. It might have helped. But Brian thinks of me as a kid and he’d never accept me as a boyfriend or partner as long as he continues to do so. I figure if I just manage to survive for the next year, Brian will continue in his own life and I’ll get sent back to mine when the year is up.”

“You forget young one that you and Brian are meant to be together for eternity. If he falls in love with you and admits his feeling within this next year, then you both will be together and the curse will be broken.”

“I don’t doubt that he loves me. What I do doubt is his ability to admit to himself or me for that matter.”

“What would make you happy?” she looked at him kindly for she truly hadn’t wanted to hurt either of them.

“I wish that Brian would forget all about me, about the legend, about seeing me every full moon. I wish that we could meet as equals, neither of us knowing the other. If we really were meant for each other, if the prophecy was really true and we were to be together forever, then it will happen no matter what.”

She looked at Justin carefully. I mean really looked at him deep into his heart and soul and saw that he meant every word he spoke. She saw that the love he held in his heart for Brian Kinney was all encompassing and never ending, an ember smoldering inside of him waiting to be kindled into flame no matter what lifetime it happened in. That’s all that Antiqua needed to see. 

“Six times six by one” she invoked and a streak of lightning flashed across the Pittsburgh night sky. “All knowledge comes undone” a clap of thunder that rattled the panes of glass and made everyone in the top floor apartment stand silent with the shock of the noise. “Six by six by one – has the dance of love begun – again lightning flew across the sky – misty moonlight will tell the tale – six times six or all will fail – or will love have won? The lights in the building behind Justin snapped out leaving the street in shadow lit only by the glow of a new moon shining through the street mists that had been generated by a trickle of rain.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Justin woke up and stretched. He could feel the sunlight on his face and could just imagine that the day must be beautiful. His dog, Fred, stood up beside the bed when Justin sat up. He knew he wasn’t really on duty. Justin didn’t need him when he was in the house, but nevertheless he liked to keep alert. “Hey Fred, we have two appointments today. I have to go to my publisher and to that new advertising firm they’ve chosen to market our new book.” He smiled when he heard his dog’s tail thump on the wood floor.

“Why don’t you go use the backyard facilities while I shower and get dressed?” Justin suggested. He’d always talked to his guide dog as if the dog understood. Living alone, just the two of them, Justin really didn’t have anyone else to talk too often.

Fred headed for the back door where he let himself out the dog door. He was a black and white non descript dog with some border collie in him among other things. Justin made his way to the bathroom where he showered and prepared himself for the day. Because he could no longer see, Justin kept the decision of what to wear with what easy. He wore nothing but black except for a heavy gold ring on his finger that looked like a full moon partially cloud covered. The talent of the artist was unmistakable. It was one of two rings he’d made just before his accident. He often wondered what had become of the other one. He’d made them to use as wedding bands should the day ever come when he found someone to love and marry. As long as Justin could remember he’d been fascinated by the power of a full moon. He had no idea why, but it had become part of his life this fascination.

He’d written a whole series of mysteries that focused on a full misty moon and was now able to enjoy the wealth they brought him. Though he could do without the notoriety, it did have a few perks though. Like being able to pick and choose who did the publicity for his books and who he’d work with. Justin shrugged into his black leather coat that hung to his knees. The leather was soft and draped well. He put on his dark glasses, though he really didn’t need them, they made him somehow feel protected against the world. Fred stood at his master’s side ready for this day’s adventure and they headed out to the street where Justin knew a limousine would be waiting for him.

“Hey Mr. Taylor, over here.” Called his usual driver.

“Nice to see you this morning Klaus.” Justin said with a laugh as Fred steered him toward the car.

“I see you’re still in mourning” Klaus joked. It was an old joke between the two friends.

“Always” Justin replied. “I’m waiting for my Prince to sweep me off my feet and dress me in something other than black.”

“You’ll find him Mr. Taylor.” Klaus replied. “The best things in life take time. Where are we headed today?” the chauffer got into the car after making sure that Justin and his dog were safely inside.

“I need to see my publisher today and then we have an appointment at Kinnetic Advertising.”

“I’ll have you there in a jiffy.” Klaus said and he turned out into the street smoothly. He hated jostling his favorite passenger.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Justin’s meeting at his publisher went as he expected it to, but he won his point. “I don’t care what Mr. Kinney does or does not do. I either deal with him or I deal with no one. I’m certainly not going to spend all the time on the talk show circuit or whatever else his company has in store for me and my books on the say so of his assistant.” Justin glared at the woman behind the desk and even though he couldn’t see her, he could tell she was nervous of him.

“Be reasonable Justin, the man’s face is partially paralyzed. He can’t speak properly any longer. His assistant Cynthia handles all of the verbal communication with clients. She virtually speaks for him.” 

“It is common courtesy for him to at least meet with me. If he wants to fob me off on his assistant later than fine. I just want to see him. You know I can get a ‘feel’ for a person. I’ll know right away if he has by best interests and by the way your best interests at heart.”

“Justin, I’ll do my best but I’m not promising anything.” His publisher sighed and looked at her favorite author. “At least you can’t see his face.”

“What does that mean?” Justin asked.

“He doesn’t let anyone see him. He has a private elevator that takes him directly to his car. His car has tinted windows and he goes right home. No one has seen him since the surgery that removed the brain tumor. Well I guess his son and his ‘foster’ father has, but no one else.” She leaned forward a conspirator all of a sudden. “I heard that he’s even refused to see his friends and family. He’s virtually a hermit and has been for weeks. If it wasn’t for the fact that he would never hurt his employees, he’d never have gone back to work.”

“So he’s responsible and has integrity.” Justin said with a smile. “See already I like the man.”

“He used to be very handsome.” She continued. “In fact he was almost a celebrity down on Liberty Avenue.” She laughed at Justin’s grin. “Yes I know about Liberty Avenue, my brother takes me to the clubs there sometimes with his boyfriend. Do you ever go to them?”

“Fred doesn’t like crowds.” Justin grinned. “I think he prefers to stay in and listen to the clacking of my keyboard keys when I’m writing.”

“I keep forgetting that you can’t see.” She laughed. “You look some a devastatingly handsome blond who likes to wear sunglasses indoors.”

“Ah, eccentric” Justin giggled. “That’s me alright and I have a thing for dogs.” He fondled Fred’s ears. Justin stood up “I’m heading over to Kinnetic now so if you’re going to do any persuading you’d better get on it.”

Despite the fact that it was almost lunch time, the drive to the Kinnetic offices was short and quickly over. Justin made his way into the large building. Fred led him to a bank of elevators and when the door opened Justin and Fred got inside with a few other people. “Could someone push the fifteenth floor button please?” Justin asked. Usually someone was willing to do it.

“Sure mister.” A friendly voice said. “Hey nice dog.”

“Yes, Fred is a good dog, but he just hasn’t got the knack of pushing elevator buttons.” Justin joked.

“This is your floor.” The voice said when the elevator doors opened.

“Thanks” Justin stepped out with Fred at his side. He rarely used his cane, though he did have one in the shoulder bag he carried. He preferred to rely on Fred’s judgment and it had worked out fine so far.

As Justin stepped out of the elevator, Cynthia, Brian Kinney’s long suffering assistant and friend left her desk and headed to the ladies room. She wasn’t expecting Justin for another half an hour and she hadn’t quite broken it to Brian that the young man expected to see him for the preliminary discussions regarding the upcoming publicity campaign.

The phone began to ring and soon Justin could hear a man’s voice yelling. “Cynthia pick up the damn phone.” The words were slurred and indistinct, but Justin’s hearing could pick up the sense of what he had to say. He nodded to Fred who began to lead him toward the by now frustrated voice. He stopped long enough at the desk he was passing to pick up the phone. “Kinnetic” he answered.

“Who’s this?” a man’s voice asked, slightly irritated.

“The answering service. No one is in the office at the moment, but I’m sure they’ll be back soon if you would call back.” Justin hung up the phone and continued walk where Fred was taking him.

He stopped along with Fred at a door. Knocking lightly he said “Mr. Kinney?” 

“Get out” growled the other man. His words were indistinct and harshly spoken.

“We have an appointment. I’m Justin Taylor and this is Fred.” Justin walked into the office until he was standing in front of a desk. He could feel it with his leg. He turned toward the desk and held out his hand. “I just need to discuss a few things with you before we begin this campaign.”

Brian stared at the young blond man standing so confidently in front of him. Automatically he took his hand to shake it. He almost jumped back when he felt a spark of something from the warm hand go right to his groin. “I don’t see clients.” Brian tried to take time to form the words but he knew they would be hard to understand. This was the part he hated having to repeat and repeat what he was saying until it was clear to whomever he was talking to.

“Well I don’t see you either, so I guess we’re somewhat even” Justin grinned and his smile warmed even Brian Kinney’s heart. “is there a chair for me to sit?” he asked.

Startled, Brian realized that there wasn’t. He was telling the truth when he said he didn’t see anyone and because of that there was no need for a visitor’s chair. “Just a minute, I’ll get you one.” He found himself saying. He came around the desk and headed for the lobby to drag in another chair. He placed it in front of his desk and was surprised when Justin sat down confidently.

“Thanks Mr. Kinney. I find that if I’m seated, then I’m more focused on whom I’m talking to. Otherwise people have a tendency to move around until I’m dizzy trying to figure out where in heck they are.”

“That makes sense.” Brian said.

“It was one of the harder things to get used to when I lost my sight.” Justin admitted. “But there’s been lots of compensations that my body has made. For instance I can tell that you smoke and your cologne has amazing properties that have been designed to attract others. I can hear things better and frankly have no difficulty in understanding what you have to say.”

“People usually try to avoid mentioning my speech” Brian began.

“Probably because they either care about you and don’t want you hurt any more than you have been or they are scared to death of you because you do come across as rather intimidating.”

“And you?” Brian asked somewhat amused. “You just plunge in and say what you think.”

“There’s no point in pussy footing around the obvious.” Justin laughed. “I can understand you just fine and I’m not afraid of you despite the growl in your voice. In fact I think we’ll get along great.”

Brian found himself staring at the other man. Perhaps because he knew that Justin Taylor couldn’t see him and perhaps because Justin Taylor was one of the more handsome men he’d had in his office in a long, long time. He knew he wanted him. He wanted him bad. It had been too long since he’d had a relationship with anything other than his right hand.

“See anything you like?” Justin asked with a laugh. “I know you’re looking at me.”

“Sorry” Brian mumbled as he tried to pull his eyes away.

“Don’t be, I’m smelling you and wondering myself what it would be like to have you in my bed.” Justin replied honestly.

“Do you talk to all of your ad agency people like that?” Brian asked with a laugh.

“Only the ones who I want to fuck.” Justin gave a giggle. “You make me say the worst things. I can’t believe I just said that.”

Brian and Justin both burst out laughing and that’s how Cynthia found them. She heard laughter coming from Brian’s office. A sound she hadn’t heard in a long time if ever. Unable to resist she looked in and saw Brian with a blond man laughing and talking. The young man seemed to have no problem understanding her friend. “Cynthia,” Brian said when he noticed her. “Justin Taylor has arrived. Would you order us some lunch please.” He looked at Justin. “Is there anything special you’d like to have?”

“Surprise me.” Justin said with a smile in Cynthia’s direction. “I don’t have very many dislikes when it comes to food.”

“Oh and Cynthia, bring a bowl with some water for Fred.” Brian indicated the dog that was sitting beside Justin. She hadn’t noticed him before and he thumped his tail in acknowledgement. 

The two men discussed Brian’s ideas for the campaign while they waited for lunch to arrive. Justin explained his requirements for each appearance and Brian said he would make sure that they were followed.

When Cynthia arrived with their food Brian said. “I usually eat at my desk. I’ll clear away a spot for you and move your chair over beside mine. It’ll be a bit crowded but not bad.”

“You clear the spot, I’ll move the chair” Justin stood up and began to move the chair around the desk. Brian was surprised at how adept the other man was. It was almost as if he could see.

Justin sensing Brian’s surprise. “I could see up until a year ago. So I know pretty much where things go in most peoples offices.” Justin grinned. “And you seem kind of predictable.”

“No one has ever accused me of being predictable before.” Brian said as he put their lunches out on the desk. “Cynthia brought us back sandwiches and a salad.”

“And coffee, I can smell coffee.” 

“Yes and coffee. How do you want yours?”

“I take cream and sugar. Just put them by the coffee, I’ll find them.” Justin took his chair and his knees brushed against Brian’s leg. “Oh am I too close?” he asked.

“No, you’re just fine. I have long legs.”

“Yes, you’re taller than I am.” Justin said as he busied himself with his coffee. “Something to stir this with?” he asked.

“Oh, sorry,” Brian searched until he found the stir sticks.

“I could have found them myself, but asking was faster.” Justin admitted. He stirred his coffee and then finding his sandwich took a bite. “This is very good and kind of nice. Almost like a picnic.” 

“I suppose.” Brian hadn’t started his sandwich; he was too fascinated by Justin. For the first time since his surgery he could be himself and not have to worry about the reaction to his ruined face or voice. “So Justin, besides writing mysteries, what do you do to keep yourself occupied?”

“I sculpt a bit and paint a bit. My first love is art.” He suddenly looked shy. “I used to be an artist before…..” he indicated his eyes behind the dark glasses. “And I like to cook though I only have myself and Fred to try out any new recipes. People that I knew before have a tendency to stay away. I think I embarrass them. You know what I mean I’m sure.”

“I know what you mean.” Brian said quietly and then impulsively kissed Justin’s cheek.
“Sorry, I don’t know why I did that.”

“I hope it wasn’t because you feel sorry for the ‘poor blind guy’” Justin said. “’Cause that would suck.”

“No I don’t feel sorry for the ‘poor blind guy’” Brian laughed. “I think he’s kind of hot as a matter of fact.”

“Really?” Justin smiled up at Brian. He removed his dark glasses and tucked them in his pocket. Brian was mesmerized by the sapphire blue eyes that were facing him.

“You have amazing eyes.” Brian whispered. “They are the most beautiful shade of blue I’ve ever seen.”

“What color are yours?” Justin asked.

“Most people call them hazel. But I guess it depends on what I’m wearing sometimes they’re green and sometimes kind of golden brown.”

“What are you wearing now?”

“This sounds like a sex phone call.” Brian said with a smile. “I’m wearing nothing, just laying here thinking of you.”

Justin burst out laughing. “Asshole” he sputtered. “No seriously, what are you wearing?”

“I’m wearing a charcoal grey Armani suit that I picked up a year ago. A burgundy Egyptian cotton dress shirt, a dark grey silk tie, Prada shoes, black silk socks, and a black silk thong.”

“Geeze, I can picture it all.” Justin flushed. “Especially the thong.”

“What you aren’t interested in my black silk socks?” Brian teased.

“Maybe I would be once I’ve seen your feet.” 

“I thought you couldn’t see.”

“This is how I see” and Justin’s fingers went to Brian’s face. Brian pulled back away from the inquiring fingers, but Justin moved faster than the other man thought possible. 
His touch was soft and warm. Brian shut his eyes in embarrassment and pain at what Justin was seeing – the fingers moved smoothly across the plains of his face. “I see you are kind.” He traced the laugh lines at the corners of Brian’s eyes. “You have amazing bone structure, bone structure that is classic.” He let his fingers linger across Brian’s lips not caring that they twisted to one side. “Your lips are sensuous, I imagine you are a terrific kisser though your beard is going to tickle and I do have delicate skin. I wonder what I’ll look like with a whisker burn?” he teased. His hand cupped the back of Brian’s head ignoring the stiff neck he gently moved Brian closer where he allowed his lips to linger lightly against the other man’s before breaking away. “And you taste wonderful.” A delighted giggle followed before Justin pulled away and settled back in his chair.

Brian didn’t know what to do or to say. Justin Taylor had broken through a barrier he’d erected the day he woke up from his surgery. He didn’t know whether to be angry or happy. But he did know that he’d treasure the kiss he’d just been given and the soft words that had been spoken for he felt almost whole again with the touch of a blind man’s fingers.

tbc