Misty Moonlight 1 “Mom” began the young tow headed boy, “do you think that there is another world somewhere with all of us there, only just a little bit different?” He was lying in bed, once again confined to his room because of an asthma attack. “Justin, you’ve been watching too much television.” Jennifer teased. “No, I’m serious Mom.” He said. “Sometimes when the moon light is just right, you know, kind of misty and a bit scary, I can see into another world. I see a boy, he’s older than me, but he lives here in Pittsburgh, only it’s not Pittsburgh. It’s kind of hard to explain.” “You probably have a bit of a fever dear. Let me get the thermometer and take your temperature.” Jennifer left to retrieve the thermometer and Justin lay back on his pillows resigned. He’d known he should never have said anything, but he really wanted to know the answer. He’d been seeing this other world for a long time. ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Brian relaxed against the thick rough bark of the oak tree in his backyard. When he’d lived at home, Brian couldn’t go into the house until his father fell asleep or passed out, which ever came first and this became one of his favorite spots to sit in the summer while he waited. He was almost eighteen now, living with Michael’s family and in the last year of high school. Soon he’d be able to escape to another world completely. The world of University was as far removed from this little piece of hell as heaven and earth. The moon filtered through the clouds and he was reminded of an early morning mist the way the light broke the darkness of night. It was the kind of moonlight he’d learned to both dread and yet look forward to because he knew that he’d be able to see into the ‘other’ Pittsburgh. He’d be able to see the young blond boy and his family living their lives like some kind of television show. The mother always perfectly groomed and the father with his evening newspaper; even the little baby sister never seemed to cry, only goo and giggle happily at the others. It was always the same boy, though not always the same scene. He thought back to the first time he’d ever seen into the other world. ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Brian’s thirteenth birthday Brian lay on his bed and stared out the window. Today he was thirteen. He’d been looking forward to being a teenager; it somehow seemed so much older than twelve. It meant he was that much closer to being able to escape from the Kinney household. But for today, his birthday, he wanted to do something wonderful to celebrate. Brian knew better than to expect his parents to even acknowledge the day was anything other than another Saturday. A day reserved for doing whatever chores his mother or father had thought up during the week. He stroked his dick lazily under the covers as he let his mind wander into the locker room after gym class. His parents would shit if they knew he got hard at the sight of his classmate’s naked bodies. But he did and he didn’t care. Fuck them he thought, relishing the forbidden word. Fuck Joannie and her broomstick and Jack and his fucking bottle. His mental profanity was making him smile. Brian could hear the sounds of lawnmowers and birds. He could hear the buzz of a fly hitting against his windowpane in a futile effort to escape. “Tough shit fly” he said, “if I gotta stay here so do you.” “Brian, who are you talking to?” his mother asked from the hallway. “Nobody.” Brian answered. ‘fuck’ he thought, ‘she’s got ears like a fucking bat’ his cock lost its hardness at the sound of his mother’s voice and Brian grimaced, now he’d have to get up. He stood at the side of the bed and swatted the fly with a comic book, squashing it onto the glass – ‘stupid fucking fly’ he thought ‘see what you did.’ “If you don’t get downstairs in ten minutes you can do without breakfast. Your father wants you to clean out the garage.” Brian listened to his mother’s words and then her footsteps as she walked down the stairs. “Happy birthday Brian, why you’re thirteen today. You should come and eat this special breakfast I made and then go out and play until your party. I’ve invited the soccer team to have dinner and then we’ll take them all to the movies.” Brian said these words in a falsetto mimicking his mother’s voice and saying words that he knew he’d never hear issued from her lips. “Mom, Brian’s being weird again.” Claire shouted down to her mother. She stuck her tongue out at her brother when he opened his door to glare at her. “He’s not even dressed and he’s in the hall in his underwear. How disgusting.” Brian made an obscene gesture in Claire’s direction with his crotch and she screeched and ran down the stairs to tell on him. Knowing that he could expect trouble soon, Brian threw on his worn jeans and a tee shirt before padding down the hall to the bathroom. “Brian Kinney, you get out of that bathroom this minute. I want to talk to you about your behavior to your sister.” Joan’s voice was loud and grated on Brian’s nerves but he opened the bathroom door with a smirk on his face, ‘never let the bastards grind you down’ was his motto. “What?” he asked innocent as ever. “Your sister tells me that you, that you.” Joan couldn’t finish; her mouth couldn’t form the words telling what Claire had said. “Mom, I don’t know what Claire told you I did, but I was just doing as you asked and getting up out of bed. I’m hungry and I need breakfast before I start the garage.” “You should have thought about that before you started being such a smart aleck.” Joan said. She cuffed the back of Brian’s head. “Get your shoes on and get out to the garage. Your father expects it to be done by the time he gets back.” Brian grabbed his sneakers from his bedroom and bounded down the stairs and out through the kitchen. He snatched a piece of toast and all the bacon off of Claire’s plate on his way past her, grinning at her outrage. Jack wasn’t home; this birthday was turning out better and better. Cleaning out the garage meant getting rid of boxes and boxes of empty liquor and wine bottles. Jack and Joan had no objection to returning the beer bottles, but heaven forbid if anyone knew how much other booze was consumed. Brian organized the bottles into anonymous grocery boxes for Jack to take away under the cover of darkness. He found his father’s stash of girlie magazines and flipped through them looking at the hot bodies of the male models who posed with them. His cock ridged as his eyes traced the well-muscled bodies imagining what was behind the bulge at each crotch. “Don’t let the warden catch you looking at those Sonny Boy.” His father drawled. ‘Fuck’ Brian thought, the son of a bitch snuck up on me. “Sorry dad.” Brian put the magazine back where he found it. “Sorry is bull shit Sonny Boy” Jack said as he deposited another empty into one of the boxes. Brian’s father looked around the garage. “If you’d stop thinking with your dick and worked a little harder, you might be finished before midnight.” “Dad, it’s my birthday, can I do this tomorrow?” Brian asked knowing what the answer would be. “Your mother doesn’t like you to work on Sunday, you know that.” Jack said ignoring the fact that it was Brian’s birthday. It wasn’t something he liked to be reminded of. He turned to leave the garage, his hands in his pockets without a backward glance at Brian. When Jack took his right hand out to open the screen door to the house a wadded up twenty dollar bill fell unnoticed by him to the step. Brian’s eyes lit on the bill and he waited for the inside door to close before he darted over and grabbed it stuffing it deep into the front pocket of his jeans. ‘Score’ he silently cheered. Waiting until his mother left for the grocery store with Claire and for his father to become engrossed in the ball game on television, Brian leafed through the week’s accumulation of newspapers. His eyes lit up when he saw the ad for the circus. It was only in town for this weekend, a perfect thing to do on his birthday. As soon as the car pulled away from in front of the house with Claire and his mother, Brian cautiously went inside. He made himself a couple of peanut butter sandwiches and drank a glass of milk, taking care to clean up any evidence that he’d been inside. He could hear the ball game on television and his father’s shouts when something happened. Not being even remotely interested in baseball, Brian wasn’t sure what was happening. He took his shoes off in order to make less noise and made his way upstairs to his room to get his jacket and the few dollars he’d scraped together and hidden. Tonight was going to be special. It was his birthday and he was going to the circus. Damn, the screen door slammed and he could hear his father calling his name. Brian looked around frantically – he couldn’t let himself be caught in his room. He raised his window and slipped out onto the roof of the back porch, taking care to close the window behind him all but the last inch. He’d need to be able to get back inside later. Moving swiftly Brian let himself down to the porch railings and then to the ground where he managed to turn the corner of the house just as his father looked out the window on an empty back yard. Brian knew that his time to disappear from the neighborhood was limited. He saw a bus turn the corner and he raced for the bus stop, not caring where it was going as long as he could get out of sight. When Brian was finally seated in the bus, he leaned back and relaxed and the first thing he noticed was an ad for the circus that someone had pasted up on the partition behind the driver. Brian grinned, an omen of good things to come on his birthday. He knew his father would be pissed and probably beat him tomorrow, but that was then and this was now. There was always the chance the old bastard would die of a heart attack or get hit by a bus. It took two transfers before the brightly colored canvas of the big top came into view. Brian got off the bus near the entrance, but rather than waste his money on a ticket to get in he decided to walk around the fence and see if he could get in without paying. He looked older than his now thirteen years, though he still was at that gangly stage of growth that would last another year or so. One of the girls in the circus was hanging some laundry on a rope in back of a small travel trailer. She smiled at Brian and winked. Brian laughed and skinned under the chain link fence where obviously others had already had the same idea and bent back the heavy chain link. “Hey” he said as he sauntered over to her. “Hey yourself” she said with a smile. “Don’t let my daddy catch you; he gets real pissed if the townies don’t pay to get in.” “Where’s your daddy?” Brian asked looking around. “Over with the tigers.” She pointed to a trailer and cage a hundred yards away. “The big guy in there has a tooth ache. They’re waiting for the vet to come. You sure don’t want to get into the ring with a tiger that’s in pain.” “I don’t want to get into the ring with a housecat.” Brian said with a laugh. “What’s the best way to get to the main part without letting your daddy know I snuck in?” “Oh that’s easy. I’ll just walk along with you, he never pays me no mind if I’m with a fella” she linked her arm in Brian’s and together to two of them strolled past the animal cages and onto the midway. It was mid afternoon and the city of Pittsburgh was out in full force to see the attractions. Brian let himself be taken from booth to booth by his new found friend. It was fun being part of the circus people. They were given a free hot dog and a cold drink from one booth and cotton candy at another. When the tilt a whirl had hardly anyone in the line up, the operator motioned them over and they rode round and round and up and down for almost fifteen minutes, both of them dizzy and giggling when they finally got off. Lucy, the animal trainer’s daughter, took Brian through the haunted house first as a participant and next in the back where she showed him how everything worked. He was introduced to the fat lady and the tattooed man. He watched the sword swallower practice with his swords and flames. He longingly watched the well muscled trapeze artists going over their routine and Lucy took him to the cook tent when it was time for dinner where he shared a meal of Irish stew and someone slipped him a bottle of cold beer, the first he’d ever tasted. Brian’s senses were on overload. The headiness of the cold beer combined with everything he’d seen and done. The smells of the circus, the popcorn and hot oil, the frying onions and the cotton candy, the smells from the animals and the people were ambrosia to his thirteen year old mind. It was the best birthday he could remember and one he’d never forget as long as he lived. For the last place Lucy took him was to her auntie, the Fortune Teller. It was there that Brian learned what could be his destiny. Brian and Lucy ducked under the heavy canvas flap that served as a doorway and into another world where the sounds clanking and clattering, buzzing and bell ringing, the shouts and laughter all disappeared as if they were in a sound proof room. Night had fallen and though the midway was brightly lit, the tent he found himself in was filled with dark shadows and mysterious smells that Brian later learned were incense and oils. A heavily veiled woman sat in a tall chair that looked to Brian almost like a throne. Its back and arms were carved in intricate designs he couldn’t quite make out and gilded like the picture frame his mother had in the living room with the bleeding heart of Jesus in it. The table she sat in front of was draped with many multi colored and fringed scarves. A thick deck of cards sat in the middle of the table waiting to be used. Lucy pushed him closer to the veiled woman and Brian bit back the sudden fear he had. He stood taller to make himself feel braver. “Come in Lucy and your young Irish friend. I see that it is a special day for you young man and I wish you well today and more. Take a seat and I’ll read your cards, my treat for someone on the threshold of manhood that should know his destiny should he chose to follow.” Brian sat down, a feeling of calmness overtook him, though his stomach churned. “Hi.” He said and looked around for Lucy who had disappeared. “Lucy has gone, she has chores to attend to and it’s been a long day for her being your hostess and guide. My name in Aniqua should you care to know. Take these cards with your left hand, for that is the hand that leads to your heart and cut them three times to your left. Now stack them with your left hand from left to right. Excellent.” Brian’s mouth and throat were dry with nervousness and he felt younger than thirteen here in the shadowed tent, but he did as he was told. That the bravado that would serve him well in future years was evident to the woman who watched. Aniqua picked up the cards and began to lay them out on the table face up in a pattern that meant nothing to Brian. The air was ripe with the smell of incense. The smoke tickled Brian’s nose and then the woman began to speak in a voice that was hers yet wasn’t. “You have had a harsh beginning to your life, but from this day on changes begin to take shape. Like an hour glass that fills one grain at a time, so shall your life unfold. Your true love comes to you by the light of the misty moon, three days each cycle will be thus until the day comes when you must choose. Like all mankind you have been given the gift of freewill and with this gift you will be tested – all that you have – all that you have achieved – all that can be – all that will be – for the life of another – in another world – in another universe – for all eternity you and he shall be together – if you should so chose the path that leads you in that direction and if he freely accepts your love without reservation, the powers that be will grant you and your love a life together always and forever.” The woman stopped talking and there was silence in the small canvas walled room. She looked at Brian as if seeing him for the first time. “Can I go now?” he asked. Her words had filled his mind and he knew that it was important that he remember them, but already they were fading. “Yes, I’m sorry I was unable to give you a reading, perhaps your age was interfering. Stop by the next time we’re here in Pittsburgh and we’ll try again.” She smiled at him with her mouth, but her eyes were dark and confused with what had happened, for never before had she been taken over by what ever spirit that had done so. Brian got up out of the chair. His mind was confused and the smell of the incense was giving him a headache. He backed up toward the entrance to the tent making sure to keep his eyes fixed on the woman seated behind the small table with its display of cards. His hands felt behind him for the tent flap. When the night air hit him he released his breath, it was only then that Brian realized he’d been holding it. The midway was closed; all of the booths were swathed in canvas and tied tight for the night. Brian looked up at the clear sky filled with stars and wondered what time it was. He hoped he hadn’t missed the last bus to his neighborhood. The excitement of the day suddenly seemed like a dream only now; the shadows that had been filled with laughter and fun were sinister and seemed to hide night terrors in their depths. Brian sprinted for the entrance and slipped between the rusted gates that were leaning drunkenly against each other half heartedly and loosely locked with a piece of chain and a padlock. There was more than enough room for a thin boy who had just turned thirteen to squeeze through. The roar of a tiger in pain and the cough of another answering sent a shiver through Brian’s bony body. The jacket he’d grabbed felt tissue thin, the night air had lost all the warmth of the day’s sun, only the cold white light of the full moon provided any illumination as Brian ran for the bus stop, his breath huffing in the silence of the night. The last bus provided an oasis of safety; its inside lights yellow casting a strange hue over the few occupants. Brian thought they all looked like zombies, eyes blackened by death, skin yellowed and sagging and he mentally urged the bus to move faster so he could leave sooner. Suddenly Jack’s wrath didn’t seem so bad and Brian knew that he would definitely be facing it. The whoosh of the bus’ air brakes and the clatter of the door as it shut behind him seemed to expel Brian onto the sidewalk. He was three blocks from home, but already the tree lined street felt comfortable in its familiarity. Hands in his pockets Brian sauntered toward his house, conscious once again of how almost perfect the day had been. His first day as a teenager. His first adventure as a teenager. The heavily leaved maples that lined the street looked like giant rounded globes of darkness when the full moon appeared just above them. Mist swirled around the tree trunks making the moonlight seem especially eerie when suddenly Brian could see a scene being enacted in front of him. It was like a movie, the mist framing the picture. A small child stood up in a crib, his hands grasping the bars as if he was in a prison. He’d been crying, but now he looked straight at Brian and though the moon lit night had turned all color to shades of grey, two bright blue eyes peered at Brian as the child watched him walking. Tears had made tracks down soft downy cheeks but the closer Brian got to the vision, the child began to smile until Brian was close enough he was sure he could touch him and then the smile lit up the night it was so bright. Brian could clearly see the small teeth and he was sure he could smell the scent of baby powder. He reached out to touch the child when the vision dissolved and once again only the shadowed trees, night mists swirling were left. ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ A year later, another unacknowledged birthday, found Brian wishing that the circus had returned to Pittsburgh. It would have been better than sitting beside his mother and sister in Church. He slumped lower into the pew, the back of his head barely visible to the person behind him as his spine curled. His eyes drifted closed and he let his mind travel to the ‘other’ world. The world that he saw in the misty moonlight of the full moon ever since his thirteen birthday. A world that was filled with love and a blond haired toddler who made him smile every time he saw him. It was stupid Brian knew, it wasn’t real, it was just some kind of weird wide awake dream. But he’d come to look forward to this little glimpses of the toddler’s life. No matter what kind of crap he had to deal with, a peek at smiling blue eyes and that amazing grin, made him feel whole again. He’d watched the boy learn to walk and he’d watched him learn how to escape the bars of his crib. Brian was glad no one had been around to see him when the boy had fallen to the floor the first time because Brian cried in frustration that he hadn’t been able to save the small boy. He’d wanted to scream at the young woman who had swooped in to rescue the boy. He’d wanted to beg her to watch her son more carefully and then the boy looked over her shoulder as she cradled him and smiled at Brian a smile of triumph and Brian laughed out loud and shook his head at the small scamp. “Ow” he said out loud. Heads turned to stare at him. Claire looked straight ahead, the fingers that had pinched his thigh curled innocently in her lap. Brian glared at her but sat up straighter under the relentless stare of his mother. ‘Wonderful,’ he thought, ‘I’ll fucking be grounded again.’ The priest droned on, his voice a perfect pitch to hypnotize a fourteen year old boy and make him want to shout and scream with the ‘Holy Spirit’ just to escape the mind numbing boredom of the over heated Church. Brian entertained fantasies of doing just that until he couldn’t stand it any longer and when the congregation stood for a prayer and all eyes were piously turned down, Brian slipped like a wraith up the aisle to escape through the wide doors. The bang of them slamming shut caused a shot gun blast that echoed through the sanctuary. Another birthday and another afternoon escape. Brian laughed to himself as he sprinted down the sidewalk. Not caring where his long legs took him as long as it was far from the Irish neighborhood he’d grown up in. His run turned into a lope and Brian traveled more than two miles quickly. He was the envy of the track team, if they only knew why he was so fast. It was amazing what running for your life, your very existence did for building your stamina. Slowing to a walk, Brian turned toward a busier section of town, one he hadn’t been in before. He reached the corner of Liberty Avenue and Third Street and stood looking around in amazement. It was cool as the circus had been the year before. Hands in the pockets of his jeans Brian began to walk down Liberty Avenue, his adult strut already firmly a part of his persona. He looked older than his fourteen years and at almost six feet tall he took full advantage of the fact no one could guess his real age. The time spent on the soccer team and working in the yard under his father’s direction had firmed up his body and begun to add some definition to what had been a thin lanky boy. The looks he was getting from some of the men as he window shopped began to make Brian nervous, so when he saw the friendly looking waitress in the diner’s window he didn’t hesitate to go inside. “Hey kiddo, I haven’t seen you in here before.” The waitress said. Before Brian could answer the bus boy came out of the back. It was a kid from his home room, they only had gym and English lit together. Brian racked his brain for the kid’s name, Michael he thought it was. “No I haven’t been in here before.” Brian said as he slid into the back booth. The table still held the remnants of the previous occupants and the bus boy came over to clear it. He looked at Brian, nervously though he had recognized him the moment he’d walked in. Brian was well known in the school as a straight A student with an attitude. “Hey, Mikey isn’t it?” Brian drawled. “Michael.” The boy muttered. “What do you want kiddo?” the waitress had joined them. “Michael, do you know this handsome young man?” she asked with a smile. “Mikey’s in a couple of my classes ma’m.” Brian answered for the now flushed bus boy. “Well that’s nice. Michael needs to make some friends. Why don’t you join your friend honey? I’ll bring the two of you some lunch on the house.” “Ma” Michael started, he ducked his head embarrassed that his mother was forcing him on Brian Kinney, the most mysterious boy in the school and one he’d had a crush on since the first school day in September. “Sure, sit down Mikey, have some lunch.” Brian agreed. “You must be Mikey’s mother.” He looked at the waitress. He couldn’t imagine the relationship; they were nothing like each other. “That’s right, Debbie Novotny here and your name?” “Brian, Brian Kinney, Mikey’s in my home room and English Lit class.” “Well you boys have fun. I’ll go and order your lunch.” She patted Michael’s cheek before turning and heading toward the kitchen. “Brian, you don’t have to do this.” Michael said. “Ma, she gets carried away sometimes.” “Sit down Mikey, have lunch.” Brian said. “So Mikey, I never see you around, what do you do with yourself after school?” “I work here after school and I read comics, my favorite is Captain Astro.” “Really, I wish I had an after school job. I’m saving up for college.” “I help Ma out, buy my own stuff.” Michael volunteered. He looked at Brian, “Are you really going to go to college?” “You bet your ass I am. There is no fucking way I’m going to work in the plant like my old man.” He gave Michael a look of defiance. “What does your old man do?” “He’s dead, he died before I was born.” “You’re lucky then. My old man is still alive and meaner than a junk yard dog.” Brian had heard that description one day while watching a movie and he thought it was appropriate for Jack. “Oh” was all Michael could think to say. “Hey, you know what? It’s my birthday today.” Brian said, “I’m fourteen.” “Cool, my birthday was last month, I’m older than you.” Michael grinned. “What did you get for your birthday?” “An hour and half at mass.” Brian laughed. “I’m not even sure any of my family even remembers it’s my birthday. Besides, anyone can get born. I only celebrate achievements.” “You don’t even get a birthday cake?” Michael’s eyes were large with the wonder of it. “I don’t need the zits – too sweet for me.” Brian said offhand. “I get off in a few minutes; do you want to go to a movie?” Michael offered. “Sure” Brian agreed. He didn’t realize it then, but this was the beginning of a life long friendship between the two boys. They ate their lunch and laughed and joked with each other. Debbie stood back and watched her son and his friend, her heart full. Michael had always been a loner and she’d worried about him. Brian seemed like a nice young boy, even though he had a bit of an attitude. “Ma, we’re going to the movies.” Michael called as he and Brian prepared to leave the diner. “Just the movies Michael, stay out of Buzzy’s.” “What’s Buzzy’s?” Brian asked when they had escaped onto the busy sidewalk. “It’s this really cool comic book store.” Michael said. “He’s got first editions of all of the good ones, Superman, Batman, Captain Astro, all of them.” “You’re serious about this comic book shit.” “It’s a good way to you know, kind of forget about stuff.” Michael said. “I read books, it works the same way.” “I’m not really interested in books. That stuff we have to read for English Lit makes no sense to me.” Michael looked at Brian. “Did you know that there is a comic for each of the books we’re supposed to read for class? “They’re really cool.” Brian rolled his eyes. “No shit, I think I’ll stick to the book.” “Buzzy’s store is right here, do you want to check it out?” Michael had stopped in front of an old store, its window dusty and smeared, comic books displayed on the fly spotted ledge behind the glass. It looked like a place his mother would hate, so Brian agreed. “Sure, why not.” He said and opened the door into another world. “Hey Mike,” the balding guy behind the counter greeted Michael. “I’ve got the latest Captain Astro in.” “Cool, maybe next week, I’m going to the movies today.” Michael said. He didn’t have the money to do both. “Buy the comic Mikey; we can go to the movies another time.” Brian said. “We’ll just hang out here if you want.” “It’s your birthday, are you sure you don’t mind?” “I told you, birthdays are highly over rated, buy the comic.” Brian began to leaf through a bin of comic books, intrigued by the musculature of the super heroes, there was more to these things than he’d thought. “We could go to my house and read comics if you want. Ma won’t be home until late tonight. She’s working a double shift.” Michael offered. “Why not?” Brian agreed. Michael paid for his comic book but before they could leave a woman walked out of the back room, her long skirts swirling around her ankles, a colorful scarf around her shoulders like a shawl. It was Aniqua from the circus. She looked into Brian’s startled eyes and began to speak. “Time as we know it has allowed one year to pass, thirty six times you have looked into your future. Thirty six times your future has looked into his. Six time six the power increases. Six time six the forces that bind you both strengthen.” She turned and walked back through the beaded doorway. “What was that all about?” Michael asked. “That was one weird lady. Do you think she was doing drugs? Mom says people say weird shit when they do drugs?” “Could be,” Brian was shaken, but he’d had years of practice at hiding how he felt. The memory of his last birthday washed over him and some of the words Aniqua had spoken flooded his mind. He shook his head as if to rid himself of what she’d said. “Come on, I’ll buy us a frozen pizza for supper.” His stomach growled, they’d been in the comic book store longer than he’d realized. For some reason whenever Aniqua was around time became meaningless. Later that night as Brian walked home from Michael’s he eagerly watched the sky, greeting the night mists with pleasure, for he knew that he’d see his young friend. Sure enough when the moon reached the tops of the trees on his street, once again Brian looked into the ‘other’ Pittsburgh. “Hey Sunshine.” Brian said in greeting, his words spoken more to himself than to the young boy who sat on his small toddler bed and grinned at Brian. Brian had started to call him Sunshine right from the beginning due to the smile that always lit up the night and truthfully, warmed Brian’s heart. What had begun as just a peek into each other’s worlds now had become a reassuring friendship and even with the obvious age difference, Brian wasn’t bothered to think of this child as his friend. Had anyone cared to ask, he probably would have denied being friends with a baby, but no one knew and that was fine with Brian. Tonight he talked to the boy, telling him about his birthday as he walked toward his home. He knew the sound of his voice wouldn’t be heard by the child, but it was nice to have someone to confide in and that’s what Brian had been doing ever since the first month. The blue eyed blond appeared to listen intently and even laughed in the appropriate places, when suddenly something happened that startled Brian. Mikey walked into the child’s room. It was Mikey, the boy he’d spent the afternoon with, yet it wasn’t. This boy dressed differently, more like Brian himself dressed, and he carried himself with confidence. He lay the child back down in his bed and covered him up. He handed the boy a teddy bear and then left the room. This Mikey appeared to be baby sitting the boy. The blond sat back up and waved at Brian, and blew him a kiss before returning to his pillow and falling asleep. Brian couldn’t keep the smile off of his face as he climbed up on the roof of the back porch and into his room through the half opened window. His little Sunshine always did that to him, made him smile. ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ The next year was an eventful one for Brian. He began to work at the diner busing tables and was surprised by the amount of money he could make in tips that were slipped into his pocket by the men who were regulars. Later in life when Brian thought back to that year, he remembered it in a sequence of events, like special episodes of a television show, The Life of Brian Kinney. Meeting Michael began his year and like a lot of friendships that are formed early in life, this one worked because of the outward contrast in the two boys. Yet, they were very much alike in some ways. Both of them had father issues, both of them had dominating mothers and both of them were queer. Brian was sleeping over after an especially harsh confrontation with his father yet again. Michael had offered to put some ointment on the welts on Brian’s back when the soft touch of his fingers began to move off of the wounds and down lower until they caressed the smooth globes of Brian’s ass cheeks. Brian’s cock was rock hard which wasn’t all that unusual; they used to joke at what made Brian hard, pretty much anything except girls. His breath ragged, Brian stopped Michael from going any farther. He wanted to explore more, why not, he was almost fifteen and horny as hell. But not with his friend who cared a about him a little too much. Brian didn’t need to encourage Michael any more. And then there was the little blond boy. Somehow fantasizing about sex with movie stars and rock idols was fun, but he just knew that his young friend wouldn’t like him to do anything with Mikey. Brian couldn’t explain the feeling, and it wasn’t as if they actually talked, because only Brian ever talked to the boy. It was a feeling he had deep inside of him. “Why not Brian?” Michael asked disappointment evident in his eyes. At a loss for a reason that his friend would understand, Brian finally said. “We’re friends Mikey, friends don’t have sex. It wouldn’t be right and it would hurt our friendship.” The next episode in The Life of Brian Kinney Show took place in the locker room showers after winning the last game of the soccer season. The adrenaline was high(,) the smell of sweaty and triumphant boys heady as they laughed and joked their way through their showers. The coach stood back and watched them; his eyes constantly wandered to Brian Kinney, the tallest boy on the team and the best player by far. The man adjusted his stance to hide his thickening cock. If he didn’t know better he’d swear to God that the Kinney boy was deliberately flirting with him. That he was deliberately flashing his perfect ass and his perfectly shaped cock while he dressed and showered with his team mates. It had been like that all season. Soon the boys would be gone and he could jerk off in the shower alone with his thoughts, the long thick cock of Brian Kinney fresh in his mind. They all disappeared through the swinging doors. The room was left with puddles of water and discarded towels. A wet sock hung over an open locker door. Someone’s book bag sat abandoned in the corner. Alone, finally, the coach sighed. He grabbed his towel after stripping off his coach’s uniform. Choosing the shower furthest away from the door, the one hidden by a bank of lockers, he stepped into the welcoming warmth of water. He shut his eyes and he let the water stream over his face and hair, when suddenly a mouth engulfed his hard dick. Startled the coach looked down only to see laughing hazel eyes looking back at him. Brian Kinney knelt in the stream of water, not caring that he was getting wet. Like a dream the coach watched and felt the teen suck and lick his cock until he couldn’t control it any longer and he shot his load in an orgasmic wave that almost brought him to his knees. Still saying nothing, Brian stood up, a tongue in cheek smirk on his face. He leaned over and kissed the coach, letting him taste himself on his tongue. Grabbing a towel, Brian dried off his face and hair before disappearing around the corner and out the door. Michael was horrified when Brian recounted his locker room blow job. Gym class showers were never the same from then on for Michael. Every time he saw the end shower his cock got hard to his embarrassment and the amusement of his class mates when they noticed. Brian didn’t help the situation any with his teasing innuendos though most went over Michael’s head. The episode of The Life of Brian Kinney Show that brought him the most pain was the day his father discovered his hiding place where the money he’d earned and saved for years was hidden. “Where did this money come from?” Brian’s father roared at him. Jack Kinney stood holding a tin box that had formerly held cookies in his hand. “Where did you steal it – have you been stealing from my wallet?” Brian was sure his father’s eyes were red like some demon on the pages of Mikey’s comic books. He backed away from the man as he stammered. “It’s my money, I earned it. I’m saving for college.” “Too good for the likes of us are you Sonny Boy?” Jack Kinney asked as he moved closer to his son. “You’ll get a job like every other boy on this block and start contributing to this house. I’ve worked damn hard to put clothes on your back; it’s time you returned the favor. Sixteen boy, sixteen and you are out working. It was good enough for me and it’ll be good enough for you.” he turned his back. “Give me my money back.” Brian said. The fear of the loss of his savings outweighed the fear of his father. “It’s my money. I earned it.” “You live under my roof Sonny Boy. It’s my money now.” Brian ran over to grab the box out of his father’s hand only to be back handed across the room. He landed against the bed post, the narrow wood biting into his back. Brian could feel blood fill his mouth where his teeth cut his lip. “My money, give it back.” Brian slurred defiantly, though he knew his money was gone now. Jack’s answer was a mirthless laugh as he headed down the stairs to his car. There was a card game at the lodge tonight and now he had a stake. Brian sat on the floor of his room and cried. Something he hadn’t done in years. His dreams of escape lay tattered around him. He wasn’t sure when he became aware that he was being watched. Perhaps it was the familiar glow of moonlight that filtered through the lace curtains on his window. But something made him look up and there was the small blond boy standing in front of him close enough to touch yet a universe away. The boy looked at him and held up a piggy bank. He indicated to Brian that he should have put his money in the bank. Brian shook his head, not sure how the boy even knew what had happened, when all of a sudden it came to him. He wasn’t saying put the money in a piggy bank, but in a bank. As soon as that realization hit the sunshine smile was on the smile boy’s lips, he knew Brian had understood. And as always when Brian put his hand out to touch the smiling lips, the scene dissolved and once again he was alone in his bedroom. Debbie went with Brian on his next payday to the bank near the diner. She made sure he had the correct kind of account and watched him as he proudly deposited his paycheck. He made arrangements for her to deposit his tips because he couldn’t always make it to the bank during banking hours. Michael had told her what had happened to Brian’s savings and why he was saving. She understood completely and assured Brian she didn’t mind the extra trip to make his deposits. He asked her if she would keep his bank book for him. It was the first time he indicated that everything wasn’t good at home. But Brian knew that if his father found the bank book, the money was as good as gone. The day Brian’s fifteenth birthday dawned he woke early. It was a school day and he wasn’t expecting much of anything. No trips to the circus and Liberty Avenue had become too familiar to be interesting any longer. Mikey had asked him over for supper and to watch a movie, but because it was a school night he wasn’t sure his parents would let him go. But the powers that be were working in Brian’s favor. His mother informed both him and Claire that she had a meeting of the Ladies Auxiliary at the Church and it was her turn to do the lunch, so she would be out of the house by five o’clock. When Jack grumbled about his supper not being ready she suggested he eat at the lodge. No one offered any suggestions for Claire or Brian. Claire smirked in Brian’s direction and informed them she was having supper at her friend Beth’s who lived down the street. Brian mumbled something about homework and an early night though he was secretly crowing. He’d be at the Novotny house having Deb’s lasagna or spaghetti and watching a movie. Deb’s brother Vic was an unexpected guest when Brian arrived. He’d met Vic before. The man appeared to Brian to be the ultimate in sophistication. He lived in New York City and was a well paid semi famous chef at the largest hotel in the city. And better yet, he was a gay man who lived his life out and proud at a time when Pittsburgh wasn’t ready to accept that kind of life willingly. It was to Vic that Brian had first confessed his sexual preferences and it was Vic who gave him advice. Brian loved to listen to his stories of the adventures of a gay man in the night life of New York and while Michael was some times embarrassed at the exploits of his uncle, Brian was fascinated. After dinner had been eaten and the kitchen returned to normal, Michael went with Debbie to rent the movie. Brian was alone with Vic and they sat on the front porch while Vic smoked. Vic looked at Brian, “I have something for you. I was waiting for my cab to take me to the bus stop when a woman handed me this envelope for you. She said you would know who it was from.” The man looked at Brian curiously as he handed over the small vellum envelope. Brian’s name had been written in a cursive script on the front. Six by six not once but twice – love builds by threes – sometimes not so nice – and yet we still search far and wide – for love that’s true cannot hide – and you will find that six by six once again will bring you closer to your friend. Brian read the words over and over not sure what she meant. He knew it has to be from Aniqua, who else would be so cryptic though why he had no idea. “It’s just a birthday card sort of “ Brian mumbled to Vic. “Brian, why didn’t you say it was your birthday?” Vic asked. “We could have had a cake.” “Supper was good.” Brian said. “and we’re going to watch a movie. “What would you like to do, maybe we could do something exciting later.” “I’d like to go to Babylon.” Brian smirked. “Shit Brian, how old are you?” Vic asked. “Fifteen today.” “If I take you, you have to promise not to tell Deb or she’ll have my hide.” “I won’t tell.” “And no going into the back room.” “What’s the back room?” “Nothing you need to know about at fifteen.” “Will you take me in there when I’m sixteen?” Vic didn’t have to think about that one. Brian would be legal then. “In a heart beat Brian, in a heartbeat. ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Fifteen to Sixteen was twelve months of hell interspersed with glimpses into a four year old’s life. Beginning with a trip to the hospital to set a broken arm when Brian arrived home more drunk on dancing and life than alcohol; when he stumbled into the arms of his father who had been waiting for his arrival. Brian knew it was going to be a hard year, for that was the year he grew taller than the old man. He was taller and better looking and far more intelligent than his father could ever hope for and he flaunted it with the foolish superiority of teenage youth, two stupid to accept his mortality at the hands of his parent. Despite bruises and broken bones Brian maintained his place on the honor roll at school. Michael continued to be his closest friend though he never tried to tell him about his moonlit visions after the first time. It wasn’t worth the effort. There were times that Brian thought he was going crazy being able to see these glimpses into another world. When that happened he’d fall into bed on the nights of the full moon only to waken when the moon had set with the smell of lemon shampoo, or chocolate cake filling the room. And once he woke to the trill of childish giggles that faded as he sat up in bed. Other nights Brian would stay awake for hours talking about his hopes and dreams to the small boy who seemed to listen avidly in his room. He’d watch the boy with his crayons drawing as Brian talked as if he were recording Brian’s words. Those were the nights that Brian would fall asleep with the vision of a small boy blowing him a kiss, his rosebud mouth forming the words ‘I love you’. Brian began to haunt the section of the library looking for research on the possibility that there were other worlds, other dimensions. Michael even began to take an interest, because that was his world. The world of X men and Superheroes, a world where other dimensions were written about. To Michael these things made sense and he was pleased his friend was taking an interest in things that he, Michael liked. The animosity between Brian and his father had escalated to the point where even the neighbors were beginning to take notice and Brian, after his second trip to the hospital in the back of Debbie’s car, realized that the time had come when he had to leave home. He stayed a week at Debbie’s, sleeping with Michael in his room while he healed. When the worst of his bruises had faded, Brian made his way to the highway where he began hitching his way to New York, hoping that Vic Grassi would take him in. Brian had more than a thousand dollars in savings, but it was for school and he was determined not to touch it. New York was overwhelming, but Brian felt safe there and anonymous. He was tired and hungry when Vic found him asleep in front of Vic’s apartment door. “Brian?” Vic asked, not sure if the boy curled up in a ball on the floor of the hall was the tall cocksure young man he’d seen only three months before. “Vic, can I stay with you?” Brian asked. “I just need a place to stay until school starts again.” “Sure Brian, but what will you do then? Don’t you have three more years of high school?” “Yeah, three more years.” Brian agreed, “But maybe Dad will have calmed down if he doesn’t see me for the summer. I can get a job here, I’ll pay my way.” Debbie had told Vic about Brian’s troubles with his father and he felt sorry for the boy. “I’ll call Deb and tell her you’re here,” Vic began. “Don’t please, if you tell her she’ll think she’ll have to tell my mom. You know Deb; she always thinks she can fix things. Well she can’t fix this.” “I don’t like keeping things from her Brian. She’ll worry.” “I’ll send her a postcard. I’ll tell her I’m okay, that I’m staying with a friend and I’ll be back in September.” “Well, it might work.” Vic agreed. “But what about your parents?” “That’s what this fight was all about. Dad wants me to quit school when I turn sixteen and get a job at the plant. There is no fucking way I’m going to do that. I’m applying for every damn scholarship and bursary there is, I’m getting the fuck out of the Pitts and getting an education.” “Good for you Brian. I know you’ll do whatever you set your mind to.” Vic looked around his small apartment. “You can have the sofa. Tomorrow you can come with me to work, there has to be some kind of a job there you can do.” “I’d like a job as a waiter if I can get one. I need the tips.” “You need to be older Brian.” “I can do older.” Brian said with cocky assurance. Vic had to laugh. Brian Kinney hadn’t been down long. He was back already as cocky as ever.