Thanks to the beta TC and to Kami for everything she does for me. Love yas and thx to the girls.
Emmett’s POV: “How did you fuck up Brian?” I ask him. “Justin saw the file that I have on him. Em, I didn’t read any of it. I brought it home so no one in the office would snoop. Ok, the truth is I was still curious as to how you and Justin came across each other and why you were so protective of him. I didn’t read it. I told Justin that and he said it wasn’t the point. Em I really like Justin.” Brian whines to me. “Damn it Brian, is he still there?” “No, he stormed out.” “Fuck, Brian Aidan Kinney, I should have warned him more, or warned you more. Fuck, I would have your fucking balls in my next cosmo if I thought it would help Justin. Ok, listen to me. I need to find Justin. When he is upset about the past, I know how he gets.” I tell him “I want to help find him and I want him to know regardless of anything, I care for him. Hell Em, I was beaten up on a daily basis as well. Michael was my savior. I understand his anger and how he is feeling right now.” Brian tells me. “Brian, getting beaten wasn’t all Justin got and it’s not up to me to tell you. I don’t think it’s a god idea for you to come near him right now. You are why he is angry. Well, more of the fact you looked into his past and you know his dirty little secrets. I’ll stop by and get the file, DON’T fucking look at it. That way he sees I have the file. Then once he calms down he will talk to you. Justin is like that. He gets mad at the person or himself because he’s mad at things that happened. Just don’t look at it. Justin will talk to you WHEN HE is ready. Not before.” I reply, putting my shoes on. “Em, I am sorry. I’ll be here.” “Brian, I know you like him and care about him, but think about how you feel when someone looks into your past, reading the file really isn’t the point, it’s that you didn’t trust him to talk to him about it. Plus you hate having people know your dirty family secrets.” “Em, I know this. I really like him. Please just find him and let him know I’m sorry and I’m here when he is ready to talk.” “Fine, I got to go. Call you later.” I tell him before hanging up. Ten minutes later I was knocking on Brian’s door. “Justin?” He said as he opened it. “Sorry, just little old me. I came for the folder.” He hands it to me. “I wish you would let me go with you. I know what it’s like to be in his shoes.” “Brian, right now Justin is in his place where it doesn’t matter what happened. When he would get like this I would have to pull him out. I will not let him go through this alone. Don’t worry I know where he is. I talked to him on the cell. He answers me all the time.” “Did you tell him I’m sorry?” He looks so lost. “Yes, I did and he said right now he doesn’t want to think about it. Brian, like I said, there is more to his past then you know or than he is willing to share with you. He barely knows you.” “I know. You have told me this a few times. It wasn’t only beatings he got, but something worse as well. What was the worse part?” he asks me. “Brian, I can’t tell you one way or the other, this is Justin’s place to tell you. I need to go to him. Just promise me, no more snooping. Let him come to you.” “I can’t believe I am having this talk with the queen of liberty.” He smiles at me. “Ok, I promise.” “And I can’t believe the king of liberty is actually wanting to open up about his life to someone and love someone as more than a friend.” His smirk disappears from his face. “You don’t know shit.” He said, but smiling to soften the blow. “Go find our little ray of sunshine.” “See ya, Brian” I walk out and go to where I know Justin will be. The place he said to meet him at. He’s at the bar having a few drinks and I walk up and motion to Trevor to cut him off. He nods his head and walks away. “Hey, I need another one.” Justin yells to Trevor. “No, you don’t baby.” I reach around him and pull him to me, where he proceeds to lose it. I motion for Trevor to put it on my tab and we walk out. “God damn it, E. I thought I was over all this shit. I thought coming here that my life would be better, that I would be away from them. But yet, my father still shows up to ruin my life and then someone I thought I could trust and that I liked a lot and who I thought liked me goes and snoops into my past to find about me. Why would he do that? In time when I trusted him fully I would have told him. Even if he said he didn’t read it, how can I trust him?” He cries again. “It’s not that you can’t trust Brian Kinney. If you can trust anyone I would say Brian is your number one bet. He never lies and yes he might have gone about it wrong but Justin he does care for you. If Brian said he cares, then he cares, but he also likes to know the truth on things and this time he went about it the wrong way. Justin, none of us is out to hurt you. Brian wouldn’t do it if he knew how much it hurt you. Hell, out of everyone here, Brian would understand better then any of us about the beating part. His Dad was the same way on that. He didn’t do everything your father did, but he understands about getting beaten.” I hold him in my arms. “He didn’t read it, but he doesn’t have any right to go about finding out about me that way. Em, I like him too much to tell him this stuff. He will look at me differently.” “Justin, Brian has never been the kind to look at people in any way because of their pasts or where they come from. He’s an honest man with an honest heart. He makes himself out to be an asshole but he really has a heart of gold. Give him the chance, Justin. If I didn’t believe he would be good for you I wouldn’t tell you to do this. I would never tell you to trust someone I didn’t trust myself.” “Ok E, I will try to. But I can still be mad at him for snooping?” He asks me. “Oh, of course you can baby. You can be mad at him all you want for doing that. Just tell him what you can when you are ready, but not before.” He nods his head. “Want to get a drink?” He asks me. “Baby, you don’t need anymore. You are way too big to be carried anymore.” We both laugh and head to the car. We drive back to my place where Justin takes a shower. I pick up the phone and call Brian. “Yeah, Emmett? How is he?” He asks in a rushed voice. I smile knowing that Brian Kinney is now in the web of Justin Taylor and is falling for him fast. “Hi, to you too, Brian. He is fine. Drunk but fine. I had Trevor cut him off and had him put it on my tab, which never gets paid since I’m fucking him.” I start to laugh. “Em, what about Justin?” I can tell he was being impatient. “He’s fine. He is in the shower and he is mad about you going behind his back and then finding out about his past. He is scared you will look or treat him differently after knowing. I told him you wouldn’t.” “Thanks Emmett. Just take care of him and tell him I’ll talk to him when he is ready.” “No problem Brian. Night.” And we hung up the phone. Justin comes out of the bathroom and sits by me and lays his head on my lap. “Was that Brian?” he asks through yawns. “Yes, he was worried about you and told me to tell you when you are ready to talk to him again he will be waiting.” “Ok, I love you E.” “I love you to baby, let’s get you to bed. You will have a bitch of a headache tomorrow. And for the record, he is falling just as fast and hard for you.” I whisper to him as he drifts off to sleep. I pick him up and carry him to the bed and lay him down. “You and Brian belong together. I can see it in his eyes and in your eyes baby. I just hope you talk to him.” I kiss him and lay with him until I am sound asleep as well JUSTIN’S POV: The next few days went by in a haze for me. I talked to Brian and we have an understanding. He told me the first time we talked after my breakdown. “Justin, I promise that I won’t push you but when you are ready to talk, I’ll be here to listen. I am sorry for what I did. I didn’t do it to hurt you.” “I thought you said ‘sorry is bullshit’? And I know you didn’t do it to hurt me. Sorry I freaked out on you. I’m just a tad crazy when it comes to someone getting closer to my past.” I tell him. “It is bullshit when you say it mockingly and not meaning it. It means a lot when you do mean it, like I do. And now we won’t talk about it UNLESS YOU bring it up and want to.” “Thanks, Brian.” “No Problem, Sunshine.” Now it’s been a week since the night I freaked out and I have decided to go out with E to Babylon. I want to see Brian again. We have talked on the phone about everything to anything with the exception of my past. He has kept his word and hasn’t asked. We have run into each other at the diner and Woody’s for a few drinks. Some reason Trevor cuts me off and I know it has to do with Em. Tonight I will do what I do best when I have pent up stress. Well, next to painting, I do my best work on the dance floor. I walk out from the bathroom in my blue shirt and tight leather pants. “Holy Shit, baby. You look fan-fucking- tastic. Just fabulous. Brian Kinney won’t know what hit him. If you weren’t my friend, I would be all over you baby.” Em has always been one of flamboyant behavior. “Thanks E, but I’m doing this for me.” “Sure thing, baby. For whatever reason, you are dressed to make every male in there to drop to his knees and service you.” He does walks around me, looking me up and down. “I only want one guy to service me.” I smirk at him. “Then let’s go get him baby.” Em grabs my arm and twirls me around. “You do look hot J.” “Thanks, now let’s go.” We get to Babylon and there is a good large group of people here. As usual, I get a few offers and a few pinches, but Em stops them with just a look. He knows I am still a little freaked when people do that. I look around and spot Brian on the dance floor with Michael. I look at Em and smile. “Well, go get him baby.” He smiles at me and I nod, making my way to the dance floor, and towards Brian. I make my way out onto the dance floor and look back at Emmett who is talking to the bar tender while watching me. The gang is watching me, all but Michael, who is dancing with Brian. I walk over to them and lean up against Brian’s chest. Pulling his body near mine. He leans his head back against my shoulder with his eyes closed. “Hey Sunshine, I thought you wouldn’t make it tonight.” He whispers to me. “How did you know it was me?” I ask him, licking his neck. “I know your body and how it feels when it touches mine, and I know your smell.” He turns around and opens his eyes and looks at me. “DAMN, Sunshine, you look amazing.” Brian looks me up and down and smirks. “What is that look you have?” He asks me. “Well, I thought we could dance a few dances and head back to your place for some fun.” He looks at me for a second before smiling and nodding his head. “You got it Sunshine.” He says as he pulls me into his arms to dance. We grind into each other and I lean up, licking his neck. “If you don’t stop we won’t get a few dances, we will have to leave right away.” He laughs at me. We dance a few dances and see that people are watching us together. I turn around and put my back to his chest. I lean my head back. “Let’s get out of here and go home.” He whispers in my ear. I simply nod my head and look to find Emmett and he nods his head, knowing we are leaving. He walks over and hugs me. “Do what you need to baby.” He whispers to me. “And you Kinney, look out for him.” He gives Brian a warning look as Brian nods his head. We walk out of the club. “Your car or mine?” He asks me. “Well due to the fact that I came with E, I think best to take your car.” I grin at him. “Oh, you had this all planned.” He laughs when I simply nod my head. I have him stop by Emmett’s car to get my bag out before heading to the loft. The ride was short in spite of the sexual tension that I get when around him. Once we arrive at the loft we head upstairs. He opens the door and we step in. I throw myself at him before he could shut the door. “Whoa, Sunshine, let me shut the door first.” He laughs as he shuts the door, setting the alarm and leans against the door, smiling. “Ok, now you may ravish me.” As I laugh and jump into his arms. We tear each other’s clothes off and he carries me to the bed, where he prepares me and making me feel alive again. He makes love to me with a passion that only I get to see in Brian. He kisses my neck as he gets close. Placing his hand on my dick, stroking it in rhythm with his thrusts. As we both reach earth-shattering orgasms, he kisses my mouth. He lies on top of me, catching his breath and not pulling out of me until the last minute. “I love the feel of just being there.” He tells me. “Me too.” I repeat back to him. Kissing his neck after saying it. After lying like that which felt like a short time, but in reality was for, quite a while he gets up and goes and gets us some water. I get up and move to the couch. He comes and sits next to me. “I’m ready, Brian.” I tell him. “For what, Sunshine?” He leans his head on me. “For this.” I repeat as I hand him the file, which Emmett gave me before we left. I fold in half and stuck it on my back pocket. He leans up and looks at the file and then at me. Shaking his head and handing it back. “I want you to tell me. When you are ready.” He tells me and I kiss him and smile. “Thanks, but I want you to know, but I don’t think I can say the words. Please Brian. I am giving you permission to read it.” I say in a low voice. “Ok, come here.” He pulls me closer to him. “I want you right here as I read this. I want to share this with you.” He kisses my forehead and opens the file. I nod my head, close my eyes and hold my breath, waiting for it all to hit him at once.