

Out of the Shadows

Book 1:  The Student  -  Chapter 5


As a very junior member of staff at the Ryder Advertising Agency, Brian endured the first few weeks in the lowly, but not entirely unexpected, role of `gofer'. However, it soon became clear that his talents were being severely underused in this capacity and a more constructive program, under the watchful eye of Don Grainger; Human Resources, was arranged which allowed him to spend time in each of the departments; thus enabling Brian to find the direction that most suited him.

Accountancy wasn't really his thing and Brian was thankful he hadn't followed that route. Number crunching alongside button-down boring bean-counters; even if they did now use the latest available computer technology instead of written ledgers, definitely had no allure and everyone seemed middle-aged, even while still in their thirties. But Brian was pretty amazed at the value of the campaigns Ryder's put together and it didn't take long for him to realise just how lucrative a career in a top advertising company could be; in the right position. Not that money was the issue; but it appealed to him to be financially independent from his parents in order to prove to them he could support himself without their backing.

Account Co-ordinating was only a little more interesting; and the thought of chasing people regarding schedules and deadlines sounded pretty boring and not something Brian could ever imagine himself doing. Running after people was definitely NOT Brian Kinney.

Though creative, Brian was not really an artist. Being able to take the account managers' ideas and put them into the form of advertising posters and demo boards or producing graphic layouts, required specific talents; ones out of reach even for Brian, which ruled out the Art Department.

Carrying out market research; getting together target groups of people and running campaigns passed them was more like it; the worth of feedback shaping the final campaign to be presented invaluable. But this also included undertaking statistical work and verifying the findings to be presented to the client: still not quite Brian's bag.

No, if advertising was going to be Brian's chosen field, then he wanted to be at the sharp end; involved directly in the campaigns that shaped the way people led their lives; purchasing goods and services brought to their attention via the best campaigns; employing the art of persuasion and to eventually become an Account Manager would be his eventual goal.

The Media Services Department was far more interesting; costing out and purchasing blocks of media time on TV or space in magazines and newspapers; whatever was required to reach the optimum audience numbers possible, but the Copywriting Department was where Brian felt most at home.

Always quick-witted and eloquent, he was now in his element; sitting alongside people developing concepts for campaigns and responsible for writing the ad and promotional copy; working closely with the art director and teaming up with the art department to brainstorm visual and verbal content; forming a cohesive approach.

A position for Junior Copywriter had recently become available and though Brian hadn't been with the company very long, this was what he knew he wanted to do and that it would get him a foothold in his chosen career. However, Don Grainger informed Brian that the competition was pretty stiff and that he would have to pull out all the stops to have a chance of succeeding. Staying on well into the night, Brian gathered as much information as he could and then went home to put together an application that couldn't be ignored.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After a few quiet moments, focussing his mind, Brian began the task in hand; working almost until dawn to put together an extremely well written proposal for a campaign for a new account and eventually crawled into bed around 4:00.

Eyeconic Optics were looking to achieve a far higher profile than they currently enjoyed and hoped their new range of sunglasses would do exactly that. From the information he'd put together, Brian produced facts and figures; forecasts against required outlay: the findings of the market research they'd already undertaken on Eyeconic's behalf and suggested the media coverage required and the length of the campaign; together with a few ideas on the content of the visual advertisement and writing the copy to complete his proposal.

To say Don was impressed was an understatement. He'd never in all his years in H.R. met a junior staff member who was so obviously determined to get ahead. Brian's enthusiasm and hard work had to be admired and a formal interview was arranged.

The competition was a little older and with more work experience, but Brian's ability to verbalise his ideas, the confident way in which he presented them and the way he sold himself as well as the product, secured him the position. He was on his way and though not given the recognition, his proposals were taken seriously and formed a major part in securing the Eyeconics account.

Brian soon earned quite a reputation for himself; coming up with some of the most original and innovative ideas the company had seen in a long while. Promotion wouldn't be too long in coming.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Brian and Lindsay had maintained an extremely close friendship after leaving college and Lindsay had given up trying to do the right thing to please her parents and was now open about her sexuality and had recently met a young lawyer; Melanie Marcus and things seemed to be getting pretty serious on that score. The girls were now even talking about moving in together and Brian had rolled his eyes. Lesbians; why did they see the need to set up home at the drop of a hat; why this urge to be a couple? Christ: they'll be talking about having babies any day now. He couldn't understand it, but while he and Mel rarely agreed on anything, he tried to be civil, occasionally, just to please Lindz.

So as Brian's progress through the ranks continued and after a while of being more financially independent, he made his first major purchase: a Jeep Wrangler and took Lindsay with him to the dealership when he went to choose it; determined to buy new and not used.

The car salesman; presented with two attractive young people, automatically took them to be a couple; an assumption neither Brian nor Lindsay bothered to rectify and while Lindsay used the ladies room, Brian was shown over the car, and urged to be cautious.

"Are you sure you want THIS car?" asked the salesman and Brian raised an eyebrow in reply to the man's question.

"Only &#8230; fags drive this car &#8230; I don't know what it is about them &#8230; but they love `em."

Brian closed his eyes briefly and nodded. Christ; he had a good mind to drive the car straight through their fucking windows; it would almost be worth it just to see the expression on this asshole's face, but instead he took a deep breath to calm himself. Cheng would be so ashamed of him for what he was thinking at this very minute and now Brian turned to the salesman, smiled and answered flatly.

"Thanks for the warning &#8230; but I'll take it".

He beat the man down relentlessly; securing the best deal he could and with every feature available, the car was duly purchased.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

At least once a month, Brian made sure he went home to his parents for Sunday dinner and would call them a couple of times during the week.

Jack and Joan missed him badly, but especially his Mother; that special bond between Mothers and sons so evident here.

And it was after one of their family dinners that Brian dropped what he thought was going to be a bombshell.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"More potatoes Brian?" asked Joan, picking up the dish, but Brian had waved it away. "Are you sure you're eating properly?" she asked him and Brian smiled at her Motherly concern.

"You should eat more &#8230; I can always bring you something over &#8230;" his Mother continued, worried about how slim he was, but she had to admit, he did look fit; but it wouldn't hurt him to put on a pound or two.

Though the Kinney's did have someone who helped around the house a few days a week, Sunday was a day they were on their own. Jack had gone into the study to go over some papers and whilst Brian helped his Mother clear the table and load the dishwasher, he summoned up his courage to approach her.

"Mom &#8230; finish that later &#8230; come and sit down &#8230; there's something I want to talk to you about".

Joan had looked at him questioningly and had dried her hands before joining her son at the kitchen table; but she somehow knew exactly what was coming.

Directness had always been one of Brian's characteristics and today was no different. No point in sugar coating it: he'd decided. Best to come right out with it. He didn't want to hurt her, but it was time she knew; but all the same, his stomach was churning as he spoke.

"I'm gay," said Brian and he hoped his Mother wasn't going to cry; he couldn't stand that.

Joan closed her eyes briefly and gave in to a deep sigh of relief: an
action that totally confused her son. Then, she closed one hand over Brian's on the table and the other she brushed against his cheek.

"I know," she said gently and Brian's eyes opened wide in surprise.

"What?" "I've always known &#8230;" continued Joan.

"Then you'll talk to Dad for me?" asked Brian, hopefully, but Joan smiled at him and shook her head. "He already knows &#8230; we've always known".

Brian pulled away from her hold and got up and went over to the counter. All the years he thought he'd hidden it and all the time they knew? But how? And he turned around to face her.

"I don't believe you could have known &#8230; is it that obvious?"

"Is what obvious?" asked his Father, coming into the kitchen with the Sunday paper in his hand and seeing that he'd obviously walked in on something, Jack went to stand by his wife and Brian turned away: not wanting to meet his Father's gaze.

"Brian &#8230;" said his Mother encouragingly and Brian turned back to face them: looking from one to the other.

"I'm gay &#8230;" he repeated at last, now looking directly at Jack and Brian bit his lip, waiting for his Father to respond.

Putting the paper down on the table and without a word, Jack approached him. He was not a small man by any means and Brian pulled himself up to his full height.

Of the two of them, it was Jack he was dreading telling the most. He'd heard about other guy's Dad's reactions to them coming out; most of them seemed to go ballistic and lash out at them.

Why did men always see it as a reflection on their own masculinity; the fact that they'd produced a gay son? And now Brian wondered if he was going to have to protect himself from his Father and he prepared himself against a possible blow.

But instead, Jack smiled and reached out to him and Brian felt himself fall into his Father's arms and they hugged; how they hugged, for what seemed like several minutes, while Joan sat at the table crying softly.

One revelation was out of the way and more than enough for one day. Brian's birthday was in a few days time and then they would have work to do.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jack and Joan knew Brian would prefer to spend his birthday with his friends, even if he hadn't said as much and had taken him out to dinner the night before.

Franco's was one of the most expensive and exclusive restaurants in town and though the Kinney's rarely ate out, when they did, it was here they came. Sitting quietly in a secluded booth and enjoying a delicious meal, they couldn't help but hear the raucous noise coming from a nearby table.

Looking through the screens, Jack Kinney recognised the man holding court; his photograph was often in the paper. But that wasn't the only reason why Jack was aware of him.

Craig Taylor had brought his wife, Jennifer and son, Justin to dinner, along with a few business contacts. Jennifer looked decidedly uncomfortable in her husband's presence and on the end of several harsh rebuttals when trying to advise him not to drink quite so much.

But Brian was staring at the young blond sitting at the table; a beautiful young man who looked incredibly embarrassed at his Father's boorish behaviour and while the obviously gay waiter served them, his Father whispered to one of his companions and the word "faggot" could be clearly heard whilst the men laughed.

Brian saw the blond look up at the waiter and caught the apologetic look in his eyes. He couldn't be sure; he was too far away. But those eyes looked to be incredibly blue.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

With Brian occupied for so much of the time, Michael had struck up a friendship with a couple of guys who came into the diner a lot and before long the four of them became a little gang of friends.

Emmett Honeycutt hadn't long been in town, having moved to Pittsburgh from Hazlehurst, Mississippi and was working at `Torso', the men's wear store on Liberty Avenue. He and Michael hit it off as friends straight away and when Michael decided that he really should be leaving home and had found a reasonable apartment, Emmett had moved in to share it with him.

And then there was Ted Schmidt: a `bean-counter', who had just qualified as an accountant and was working for Wertshafter's Accountancy firm. He and Em had soon become best friends and Teddy had taken quite a shine to young Michael, even though he would never have the courage to admit it.

The birthday boy looked suitably hot in skin-tight pants and black wife-beater and the gang headed for Woody's where they would have a few drinks before moving on to Babylon. 

Mikey had given up his job at the Big Q and now managed the Red Cape Comic Book Store. This place had been his dream ever since he was ten years old, when he'd come in eagerly awaiting the latest copy of Captain Astro. And when the proprietor had wanted to cut back and take it a little easier, who better to manage the place than someone who knew his stock inside out.

Michael also now had a boyfriend: Ben Bruckner, who taught at the local college. Luckily for Michael, Ben was the patient type who waited for Michael to once and for all accept Brian would never want anything more than friendship from him and had even suggested they think about moving in together.

Brian had shaken his head in disbelief. Not again; not two more coupling up. Christ: very soon he'd be the only single one left.

Mel and Lindz had joined them and now the seven of them headed off to Babylon and had danced together before taking a break and the boys moved up onto the gallery, where they stood watching the talent on the dance floor below, but the girls had called it a night and had headed off after wishing Brian a continued happy birthday to spend some time alone.

Several guys tried their luck with Brian and got the standard answer: "Not interested", but then a well-built African-American caught Brian's eye and Brian homed in.

Heading off to the dance floor, Brian now whispered something into the man's ear and received a huge grin in the way of a reply.

"How does he do that &#8230; what does he say to them?" asked Emmett, as he and the rest of the boys watched from the balcony and Michael shook his head. No one ever knew what Brian said to the tricks, but whatever it was it always seemed to work and they watched the two men dancing together; lost in the thumpa thumpa beat of the music.

After a while, Brian nodded in the direction of the back room and the two men disappeared. Just inside the dark narrow corridor: their way barred by two hot young guys, they came to a halt. The two slightly younger men turned and eyed Brian and his trick up and down appreciatively and Brian grinned. Well, it was his birthday; he was entitled to indulge himself.

Brian's wife-beater was soon pulled up over his head and one of the young men started to kiss him; stretching up to reach his mouth and then proceed along his jaw and down into his throat. He then licked down Brian's chest; stopping to suck each nipple in turn before he resumed his journey downwards to his belly before retracing his route upwards.

Brian stretched out a hand to steady himself against the wall as the second young man kissed the back of Brian's neck and down his spine. He stopped at the top of Brian's crack before repeating the process; the original trick having undone the jeans keeping Brian's erection in check and pulled them down and now he took him in his mouth.

Brian moaned at the combined sensations coursing through him. It seemed it took three men to recreate a fraction of the pleasure he once had with Stephen and Brian tried to shake the memories of the man from his mind: instead concentrating on the men touching and kissing him.

Bringing Brian to climax, the trick drank thirstily and then, coming down from his orgasm, Brian looked around him. The three men were now on their feet and standing close up to him; surrounding him and Brian could feel the heat from their bodies: burning into his own. It suddenly felt as if the men were vying for ownership of him; challenging each other for the right to possess him. Well, nobody would ever do that and Brian pushed the men aside and dressed himself before making his way slowly back to the dance floor and he then sought out the gang who had retreated to the bar.

"Well boys &#8230; though I hate to say it &#8230; I'm done in &#8230; I'm heading home &#8230; " announced Teddy, putting his empty glass down on the counter. &#8220;Well at your age, I guess you need all the sleep you can get," smiled Brian, who was quite happy to constantly remind Ted that he was the oldest in the group.

"Me too," agreed Em and then Michael and Ben nodded and all four of them started to move away.

"You're leaving me here on my own?" asked Brian.

"I thought you'd had enough too," stated Michael, but Brian shook his head. "There's no such thing as enough," he informed him and then Brian turned around and headed back out onto the dance floor.

Michael sighed. "I'd better stay with him &#8230;" "Michael, he's a grown man &#8230; he's capable of looking after himself &#8230; you don't have to baby-sit him," stated Ben, taking his boyfriend by the arm.

"But I should drive him home &#8230;" "And who's got the keys to Brian's jeep?" asked Ben and Michael patted his pockets and sighed. "He has".

"Well then he can get himself home. Come on &#8230; we can grab a taxi. You wanna share guys?" Ben asked Ted and Em who nodded their agreement and gently pushing Michael in front of him, Ben moved away from the bar and the others followed.

Half-an-hour and another visit to the back room later, Brian suddenly realised he was getting pretty bored with the tricks that were constantly hitting on him and decided, begrudgingly, that maybe it was time to be heading off home.

He'd searched the club, but the guys had gone. Well fuck them; leaving him on his own on his birthday and he retrieved his jacket and headed outside.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Mom &#8230; who are those men with Dad?" asked Justin Taylor in the kitchen of the Taylor's large family house. He'd seen his Father and several other men move into the study: Craig laughing and slapping one of the men on the back. Jennifer tried to answer casually, but in truth, she hated the men her husband associated with.

"Oh &#8230; they're just some business contacts of your Father's," Jennifer stated as she tidied up the kitchen. "I wouldn't worry about them honey &#8230;" and she kissed her son lightly on the cheek. This was the second night running that Craig had entertained a number of Pittsburgh's most prominent businessmen, but at least two of the men in this particular party were usually employed for their muscle and not their brains and she hated them being in the house at the same time as her 17 year old son and his younger sister.

Justin picked up his jacket from the counter and started to move off. "Justin &#8230; it's getting a little late to go out isn't it?" asked Jennifer, but her son looked innocently back at her. "I'm just going over to Daphne's &#8230;" and he smiled and headed out the kitchen door.

Jennifer's heart sank, for she always knew when her son wasn't quite telling the truth and this was definitely one of those times.

Daphne Chanders, Justin's best friend, was parked at the end of the street. She'd managed to borrow her Mom's car on some pretext and sat drumming her fingers on the steering wheel as she waited for him; she didn't have to wait long.

"Are you sure this is what you want?" she asked him, as Justin got in the car beside her.

"Yes &#8230; no &#8230; yes &#8230; I have to do this Daph, but you don't have to drive me &#8230;"

Daphne shifted the car into gear and pulled away. "Yes I do," she stated. "And I'm not leaving until I'm sure you'll be okay".

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Twenty-five minutes later they pulled into Liberty Avenue and Daphne parked the car: it had been raining and the lights formed kaleidoscopic patterns in the puddles in the kerb.

"Thanks Daph &#8230;" and taking a deep breath, Justin opened the car door and got out.

"I'll wait for you &#8230; in case you change your mind &#8230;"

"I won't," assured Justin: leaning in through the car window. "Thanks for the lift &#8230; don't worry about me &#8230; I'll be okay" and he smiled at her. Daphne watched him walk down the street; his hands in his pockets and then she started up the car's engine and drove home.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

With his heart pounding, Justin made his way down Liberty Avenue: walking up and down, but not yet daring to go into any of the bars or clubs. The street was buzzing despite the late hour and he really had no idea what he was doing and he stopped and looked around: trying to decide where he should go.

The man standing at the end of the alley noticed the blond kid and how lost he looked; but he sure was a cutie.

"You looking for some company, kid?" and Justin turned around to face the man who'd spoken to him. He could smell the mixture of tobacco and alcohol on the man's breath as he moved in close, swaying slightly and he leered at him and Justin swallowed hard.

"Er &#8230; no &#8230; not really," and he started to move backwards, but the man shot out a hand to grab his arm.

"Hey &#8230; it's not polite to run away like that &#8230;" and with one hand he pulled Justin towards him and he put his other hand at the back of the young man's neck; bringing his face in closer. Christ: he had a beautiful mouth; what he'd love to do to that mouth and Justin struggled to get free, but couldn't loosen the man's hold.

"Leave him alone".

The tall, slim man stepped out of the shadows. Brian had been walking down the alley back to his jeep and had seen the little scenario being played out and something had made him stop and wait to make sure the kid was okay and then he'd seen the look of panic on his face when the guy wouldn't let him go.

The man had consumed far too much alcohol; it was never going to be a fair contest and he looked Brian up and down; realising he could obviously handle himself. Seeing the determined look in Brian's eyes, the man knew he was beat and he shoved Justin away; nearly pushing him over and Brian quickly moved in to stop the kid hitting the pavement as the creep turned around and walked away.

Brian steadied Justin and the blond turned around and found himself looking up into the face of the most beautiful man he'd ever seen. And that's when Brian recognised him. He was the kid from the restaurant the night before and even under the light from the street lamp he could see just how blue those eyes really were.

"Th .. Thanks &#8230;" stuttered Justin and Brian smiled; he couldn't really blame the guy for making a grab for him; though maybe he was a little young.

Strangely, Brian found himself feeling a little uncomfortable under Justin's gaze: those piercing blue eyes somehow looking right inside him and it was some moments before he found the power of speech again.

"Kinda late to be out isn't it &#8230; where are you heading?" he asked him and Justin shrugged. "I don't know &#8230; where's a good place to go?"

"Well, if you're into twinks &#8230; try Boytoy &#8230; or if it's leather you're in to &#8230;"

"Where are you headed?" asked Justin; cutting him off and Brian blinked.

"I'm heading home &#8230;" he answered slowly and Justin moved closer to him. "Take me with you".

He had no idea why he'd suddenly said that, but there was something about this man that made Justin feel safe and protected and a little scared all at the same time and his heart began to beat faster. Maybe it was the way he'd stepped in and saved him from the guy, or maybe it was because he hadn't rushed away, but had stayed to talk to him. Or maybe it was because this was Justin's first venture out onto Liberty Avenue and he was now lost in those eyes looking down at him; searching his own: trying to decide what to do.

Brian reached out and cupped Justin's face in his hand and then pulled away suddenly. Fuck: what the hell was he doing, wasting time on this little twink and Brian shook his head and started to move away, but Justin reached out to stop him.

"I said take me with you." Brian could hear the steel-like determination in the kid's voice and he was hanging onto his sleeve with a firm grip and Brian stopped and looked at him and couldn't resist smiling to himself. The young face, though determined, was innocent and beautiful; if this kid wasn't a virgin he'd be very surprised and Brian looked him up and down; liking what he saw.

So, he wanted to lose his cherry. "Well," thought Brian, "What's a birthday without a cake &#8230; a cake with a little cherry on the top" and he smiled. "Okay &#8230; my car's just around the corner &#8230;" and together, they drove back to Brian's apartment.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Brian threw his jacket on the couch and headed for the refrigerator. "You want something?" and he looked back at the blond who shook his head. Justin had seen Brian's photographs on the little table that served as the altar and had moved towards it.

"Don't touch that," instructed Brian and Justin looked back at him questioningly. They were only photographs; what harm would it do to look at them?

It was hot in the little apartment and Brian pulled off his wife-beater before drinking thirstily from a bottle of water and then pouring the remainder over his head: the cold water cooling his skin.

Justin swallowed as he watched Brian shake his head: rivulets of water running down the man's beautiful body and sending little droplets onto the floor.

"Why don't you come a little closer?" asked Brian and he saw the blond hesitate before taking off his jacket and Brian thought back to his first time; how confident and self-assured he'd been going back to Stephen's apartment. But as he looked into those blue eyes, he saw how unsure of himself the kid was and for a moment, Brian's heart softened.

Shit: he'd brought him back here with the sole intention of fucking this little twink out of his head. But as those innocent blue eyes looked up into his own, Brian knew this one had to be treated gently and Brian noticed for the first time how pale the kid's complexion was; like porcelain, delicate and to be handled with care.

Approaching him, Justin saw the colour of Brian's eyes for the first time. He'd initially thought they must be brown, but they weren't; they were hazel; hazel with gold flecks that caught the light and though his heart was pounding, Justin moved in even closer.

He reached up to kiss Brian, but Brian pulled back, even though he was eager to taste the young man's lips; that could wait for a moment and he undid Justin's shirt and pushed it off his shoulders. Brian ran his fingers down Justin's chest and felt the young man shiver under his touch. Then, placing his hand lightly under the young man's chin, Brian tilted Justin's face up towards him. He hesitated momentarily before finally leaning forward to kiss him.

It started out sweetly, but soon the kiss deepened and Brian turned his head first one way and then the other for maximum effect. He felt Justin's lips part and tentatively, Brian placed his tongue between them. The young man didn't object and Brian began to explore the inside of his warm mouth with Justin responding: their hands now roaming each other's bodies.

Being kissed by another man; especially one as hot as this, was sending Justin's brain into orbit. From the first time he'd realised he was gay, Justin had tried to imagine what it might be like, but nothing had prepared him this; for the way a gentle kiss could end up as something fierce and almost competitive; tongues duelling with each other for supremacy.

Eventually, unable to sustain the kiss any longer and desperate for air, their mouths parted and Justin knew this was it; there was no going back.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"What do you like to do?" asked Brian; looking down at the young man lying on his bed. He knew he was teasing him; that the kid surely had very little, if any, experience.

"I watch a little TV &#8230; go to the movies &#8230;" and Brian chuckled. "I mean &#8230; what do you like to do in bed?"

"Oh &#8230; this is fine &#8230; " stated Justin, as Brian's strong hand stroked the young man's cock once more and Justin clenched his toes and gritted his teeth. He'd jerked off at home plenty of times and hoped he wouldn't come too soon and he started to sweat. Brian grinned; he knew what he was doing to the kid and he was enjoying watching him squirm.

"Are you a top &#8230; or a bottom?" asked the older man and Justin looked at him blankly. "Top &#8230; and bottom" he answered him, having no idea what it was he was saying. "Oh &#8230; so you're versatile," smiled Brian. "Do you like to rim?"

"Sure &#8230; I love it," answered Justin and Brian stared straight at him. "Well, go to it" and he waited.

"What exactly do you mean?" asked Justin slowly and Brian desperately wanted to laugh, but he didn't want this kid to think he was making a fool of him and he leaned forward: his face just an inch away from the blond's. "Turn over", he instructed him and Justin closed his eyes before rolling over onto his belly.

Brian felt the kid tense up; thinking he was about to get fucked. Instead, Justin gasped as Brian started to lick down his spine and then he felt his buttocks being parted.

The blond swallowed hard and moaned as Brian's tongue flicked lightly over his hole and then felt the increased pressure as he was entered and Justin's breathing rate quickened as Brian worked his tongue inside him.

"Oh my God". Justin's brain felt like it was going to explode and Brian continued for just long enough before he stopped; he didn't want the young man to come yet, which was quite likely if he carried on with this much longer.

"Now you know what rimming is," grinned Brian as Justin looked back over his shoulder at him: the sweat running off his body and Brian was convinced more than ever that this was the kid's very first time.

Justin rolled over onto his back. "That was incredible &#8230;" "You think so?" asked Brian. "Then you've got a lot to learn &#8230;" and he leaned forward between Justin's legs to kiss him.

Sitting back, Brian gently placed Justin's legs over his shoulders.

"Wait &#8230; at school we had this lecture &#8230; about safe sex &#8230;" and Brian nodded. "And now we'll get a demonstration".

Reaching over Justin, Brian collected the packet and lube from the nightstand and he tore the packet from the condom and passed it to the young man. "Put it on me &#8230; put it on my dick &#8230;" and Justin leaned forward and rolled the latex over Brian's shaft.

Flipping the top of the lube, Brian squeezed some out onto his fingers and proceeded to apply some to Justin's hole. "It's cold," said Justin quickly. "It'll warm up," assured Brian.

Justin briefly closed his eyes and Brian positioned himself. "Go careful &#8230;" and then Justin gasped as Brian started to enter him.

"Stop &#8230; it hurts &#8230; does it always hurt this much?"

Brian paused. He remembered how it had been with Stephen: how the older man had plowed into him: almost pushing him to the limits of his endurance. But he couldn't do that with Justin.

"A little," answered Brian. "But that's part of it," and he pushed in a little further.

Justin clung to the sheet as Brian began the strokes. "I want you to remember this," he told him. "So that no matter who you're with &#8230; I'll always be there".

Though starting slowly and as carefully as possible, as soon as Brian thought the time was right, he began to increase the power and quicken his thrusts; feeling Justin quivering under him and the kid moaned: his head rolling from side to side.

Justin felt Brian enter him further than he would ever have thought possible; he felt the man fill him completely, every nerve pulsating under the man's touch and he reached out to pull Brian down to him and they kissed and then something very strange happened.

Brian paused as blue eyes and hazel eyes; equally as beautiful, stared into each other; down into each other's souls; reaching down into their inner core; joining them together.

For the first time since Stephen, Brian felt a connection with someone he was fucking. Maybe it was because it was this young man's first time: that he wanted HIM to be his first, but it felt as if the blond was giving himself up to him without question: trusting him completely and allowing him to do as he pleased.

Resuming his thrusts, Brian looked down at Justin's face and saw the pleasure there; remembering how it felt when he'd given up control to Stephen; allowing the man to take him to a place of exquisite enjoyment. How he wanted to take this young man there.

And now Justin was incapable of processing any rational thought; his mind a jumble of emotions as Brian took over his body; powerless to stop him: not that he'd ever want to.

Justin was hard, but incapable of doing anything about it. He couldn't move his limbs: his brain unable to send the necessary signals. Realising that Justin needed relief, Brian reached down between them and the young man moaned even louder as Brian took the blond's cock in his hand; pulling on him slowly and then more quickly, bringing the strokes in line with the thrusts.

Feeling Brian's strong fingers enclose around his cock; the man continuing to pull on him, Justin could now no longer make any sound at all and his groans died in his throat as he came: sending spurts of cum over them.

Brian felt the blond tighten around him as the kid's sweet seed now covered them both; the older man's orgasm near and with a few more thrusts, Brian climaxed.

Brian had softened, but he was still leaning over him: still inside him and he opened his eyes. Pushing himself up, Justin reached out and pulled Brian to him and kissed him deeply. Now slipping out of the blond, Brian realised Justin was clinging to him and that he was clinging back: Shit.

Shit. Shit. Shit. This wasn't supposed to happen. It was supposed to be a birthday fuck and nothing more, but the way this kid had looked at him; kissed him and now clung to him was further than he'd ever intended it to go and Brian pulled away and rolled off him and without a word he headed for the shower; taking off the condom and discarding it in the trash.

Brian's reaction totally confused Justin. While they were making love; for that's what Justin felt it was, Brian seemed so caring and considerate, but then the moment Justin had tried to hold on to him, just for a few minutes, the man had pulled away.

Soaping himself in the shower, Brian realised his heart was still pounding, but this time it wasn't from the exertion. Something about this kid had shaken him. He'd felt a real connection: a connection even deeper than with Stephen. A bond almost, as the kid's eyes had bored right into him and Brian had the feeling the blond would know exactly what he was thinking, but he couldn't let that happen; there was no way this could continue. There was no way he could risk letting this young man get any closer for it would surely hurt when he walked away.

Long ago there was a man who Brian thought might care for him: following his very first sexual encounter, but he'd been cast aside, as if his feelings counted for nothing.

And then there was Stephen; the man who'd taught him everything there was to know about sex and who Brian thought might even care for him. But then the man had left; with no explanation; had abandoned him, with never really telling him how he felt; that maybe he loved him.

So, what about love: real love; the all consuming to die for love for a soul mate that everyone talked about? Brian knew his parents loved him and he knew that Michael and even Lindsay loved him. But that wasn't the love that concerned him now; the sort that leaves you breathless when you hear your name on the other person's lips: that makes your heart skip a beat when they walk into the room or when you feel like you've received an electric shock when they touch you.

Brian had never felt that sort of love and to risk losing his heart like that scared the shit out of him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Going back out into the main room, Brian moved to the bed. He had to get the kid to leave; give him the taxi fare to get him home if he had to.

But as he got closer he saw that the blond was asleep: his eyelids fluttering slightly and his breathing shallow and regular. He was beautiful; his blond hair framing his face and there was no way Brian could send him out onto the streets at this time of night.

Slowly, Brian slipped into bed beside him. What did he have to fear from him after all; he was just a kid and Brian turned on his side away from the young man, but it was still some time before he finally fell asleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Brian woke at the sound of the alarm and very slowly became aware that someone was asleep beside him and, slowly looking over, recognised the young blond from the night before and he closed his eyes.

He had to get rid of him without the kid thinking that the previous night had been anything special. But then Brian thought back to his first night with Stephen and how special that had been and he groaned; the last thing he wanted was the kid to feel any form of attachment for him just because this had been his first time.

Leaning over, he nudged the blond and the young man stirred and turned over to face him.

"Time to get up," said Brian flatly and Justin yawned and rubbed his face with his hands. Suddenly, he sat bolt upright.

"Shit &#8230; what's the time?"

"7:30," Brian told him and Justin quickly got out of bed. "I am in so much trouble &#8230; "

"Whoa &#8230; why are you in trouble?" asked Brian, suddenly concerned at the young man's distress.

"My Dad will kill me when he realises I wasn't home last night," said Justin, retrieving his clothing from the floor. "And I have to go home and get my uniform &#8230;" and then he stopped, realising he'd given himself away, but Brian had heard what he said and the implication.

"You still live with your parents &#8230; and you're still in school?" asked Brian. Christ, the kid was even younger than he thought, but Justin didn't answer him.

"Well, you're still entitled to a life of your own &#8230; just tell him to mind his own fucking business," stated Brian, as he started to head for the bathroom.

"You don't know my Dad," and Justin shook his head and hurriedly started to dress: the panic obvious in his face. Brian sighed and he walked over to the young man and took the shirt from his hands.

"Go into the bathroom &#8230; grab a shower while I put on some coffee. Then while you're having your coffee I'll shower and then I'll drive you home".

"Are you sure &#8230; you'll have to drop me off at the corner &#8230;" said Justin and Brian couldn't help seeing the relief in the blond's eyes; how could he refuse. "I'm sure," answered Brian. "Now go and get your shower &#8230;" and Justin sighed thankfully and moved into the bathroom, leaving Brian holding his shirt.

Brian couldn't resist feeling the material in his hands and without thinking brought it to his face and he could smell Justin on the fabric; Shit, he could even still taste him and he tossed the shirt on the bed and went into the kitchen area to put on the coffee. But before that he retrieved the guava juice from the refrigerator and drained the carton: removing the taste of the young man from his mouth.

And while he waited for the young man to finish showering, Brian sat at the altar attempting to bring some sort of order to his thoughts. But even with the meditation techniques he'd learned, that didn't come easy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Now they were both showered and dressed and in the jeep: Brian following the young man's directions.

They'd been on the road about fifteen minutes and came to a stop sign when suddenly, Justin slid down in his seat as the silver BMW drove by.

A few moments later, Justin slowly and nervously sat upright and looked around him and saw Brian's concern on his face. "That was my Dad &#8230;" stated the young man and Brian nodded: he'd thought as much.

Five minutes later, Brian pulled up in front of Justin's home; the kid no longer worried about running into his Dad. He'd just be in time to get changed and get to school.

"You know," said Justin, looking at him. "I don't even know your name &#8230; I'm Justin &#8230; Justin Taylor".

Brian looked at him for a few moments; names had never been a priority before, but then he'd never met someone like this blond kid before.

"Brian Kinney," came the quiet answer and he saw how Justin's eyes lit up as he gave his name and Justin smiled as he opened the car door and got out.

"When will I see you?" asked the blond, looking in through the open car window and Brian shook his head. "I must see you &#8230;" implored Justin and Brian spoke softly.

"You can see me in your dreams," Brian answered him and then he shifted the car into gear and Justin stepped back as the jeep pulled away.

"Justin!" Justin closed his eyes as he heard his Mother call his name and he turned around to see her standing in the open doorway.

Jennifer had seen the jeep pull up from her bedroom window and she'd also seen the man at the wheel. She'd been worried sick about Justin all night and when Craig had asked about him at breakfast she had said he was at Daphne's. But in her heart, Jennifer knew that wasn't the truth.

"Where have you been &#8230; I've been so worried &#8230;" but Justin brushed passed her and ran up to his room, where he changed into his uniform, grabbed his bag and then headed off to school; leaving his Mother without an explanation.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Going into work, Brian couldn't get Justin out of his head; the smell, feel and taste of the young man constantly coming back to remind him. And then his Father rang him and suddenly warning bells sounded.

"Dad &#8230; is everything okay? Is Mom okay?" His Father never called him at work, but was obviously keen to speak with him.

"I know we just saw you," said Jack. "But your Mother and I need to talk to you Brian &#8230; it's very important. Will you come over for dinner tonight?"

"Sure &#8230; I'll see you later," and Brian put down the phone and for a while at least, no longer thought about the blond.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Concerned that one of his parents might be ill, Brian was pretty worried by the time he arrived for dinner, but they greeted him warmly and assured him they were both in the best of health and they sat down to eat.

"Brian &#8230; what are your earliest memories?" asked Jack, as they now sat in the living room drinking coffee and Brian took a swallow from his cup before speaking.

"Well &#8230; I'm not sure they're memories &#8230; but &#8230; when I was a kid I kept having these dreams &#8230;"

"Go on," Jack urged him.

Slowly, Brian got up and went to stand by the large fireplace and ran his hand along the mantle and then he turned to face them.

"I was in a car and I always heard this really loud noise &#8230; like it had crashed and then it would go really quiet. I could feel myself falling out &#8230; from Mom's arms I think &#8230;" and Brian smiled at his Mother.

Jack and Joan looked at each other and Brian could feel his heart pounding and he had a sickening feeling in the pit of his stomach. 

"And then what happened?" asked Joan: looking up at him.

Brian looked at his Mother and frowned: trying to recall his dream. "I remember being on the damp grass and then suddenly you were in front of me and you were smiling &#8230; and you picked me up and hugged me".

Walking back towards them, Brian could see something very serious was happening; something of which he had no knowledge.

"What's this all about?" asked Brian and his Father stood up and approached him.

"Son &#8230; we have something to tell you &#8230; something so incredible that you will probably find it hard to believe. But I'm going to ask you to open your mind and know that what we are about to reveal to you is the very reason we are all here".

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Are you telling me I'm adopted?" asked Brian, staring at his parents; or at least staring at the people he'd always believed to be his parents.

"Not exactly &#8230; " answered Joan. She'd held out her hand to him and Brian had taken it and sat on the sofa beside her as she told him she wasn't his real Mother.

"We were sent here &#8230; to care for you and to bring you up as our own child".

"We'd been searching for you for so very long &#8230;"

"Then I am adopted &#8230; why the hell didn't you tell me &#8230; you should have told me &#8230; what about my real parents &#8230; didn't they want me?" Brian's mind was whirling with the revelation that these people weren't his birth parents and all the questions he now wanted to ask just spilled out and he got up from the sofa and walked back to the fireplace.

How dare they keep this from him all his life; he had a right to know who he was and where he'd come from.

"Brian," Joan continued, "this is going to be so very difficult for you to understand, but our people had been searching for you for longer than you can possibly contemplate ..."

"OUR PEOPLE &#8230; searching for me &#8230; what the hell are you talking about?" and the anger and confusion now rose from within him.

"You have a purpose," informed Jack. "A destiny &#8230; and it's our job to give you the powers to fulfil that destiny".

And Brian stared at them wondering who was the craziest: him or them.

"Do you remember when you told us you were gay &#8230; that we said we'd always known?" asked Joan and slowly Brian nodded.

"Well, you were chosen precisely because you are gay and that is your destiny &#8230;"

"The gay community needs you Brian &#8230; they need someone to fight for them and to defend them &#8230; someone strong and committed &#8230;"

"Wait &#8230; wait &#8230; that may be &#8230; but why in God's name does it have to be me &#8230; when have I given a &#8230; when have I ever cared about the gay community? Sure &#8230; I've got friends &#8230; that I guess &#8230; are important to me &#8230; but to fight and defend &#8230; like &#8230; like something out of one of Michael's comic books &#8230;"

Jack looked at his wife and Joan got up from the sofa; she held out her hand.

"Come with us Brian &#8230; there's something we have to show you".

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Brian followed his parents to the top of the house; to a small room up in the roof he'd never even realised existed.

"If we ever need help or advice &#8230; this is where we come &#8230;" and Jack opened the door and walked in; Brian hesitated before entering and Joan followed them in.

The room had no furniture except for a table on which stood a large conical-shaped crystal, which pulsated in the low light.

"Brian &#8230; our homeland is a place called Zonan," and Jack passed his hand over the crystal, which now immediately glowed brightly and increased in its intensity and forcing Brian to shield his eyes.

Suddenly, Brian found himself looking at something he'd only ever seen in science fiction movies as the hologram appeared in the room and he was staring at scenes of a place light years away, in understandable terms, but apparently the place of his parents' birth.

It was a beautiful place and not unlike Earth; with rivers, mountains, deserts and forests and then the hologram disappeared and Jack turned to his son.

"Our people possess fantastic powers that will assist you in your fight against injustice and bigotry &#8230; this is our legacy to you &#8230; and what we have to teach you".

 
To be continued.