Out of the Shadows Book 1: The Student - Chapter 2 Brian didn't remember much of the journey away from that place, but a few memories would remain forever locked away in his subconscious, surfacing only fleetingly from time to time. A deafening crash followed by silence; falling from someone's grasp and then gently slipping out of the open car door onto the cool grass; grass still covered with the dampness of the early morning dew. The next memory Brian had was of being scooped up into a woman's arms: a smiling woman who hugged him like he was her own. A woman whose love Brian would never question. For indeed from that moment onwards he was her son. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ At the first large town they came to, Matthew sold the old car and bought a brand new model and paid cash, something the salesman didn't like to question. It had been a slow month and besides, who could doubt the honesty and integrity of such a beautiful family. They booked into a reasonably priced hotel and went shopping in a world that was still a little strange to them, but this was something they'd studied before embarking upon their task and before long, they were all kitted out in new clothes, but especially Brian, who was also hugging a brand new teddy bear; his own having been left behind. "Don't spoil him," his Mother was warned, but she only smiled at her husband. "How can I not?" she asked him. "It's obvious how much he's gone without … you only have to look at him". Her husband put his hand on his wife's arm as they watched the boy sitting safely in the child's seat in the back of the car and hugging his new toy. "I know … but possessions don't make up for his parent's love and he needs to learn how to appreciate everything … that nothing is an automatic right". "He will," came the answer. "But he also needs to know we care … a few indulgences along the way will cause no harm … if we handle it carefully." And indeed, little did Brian know that he would now grow up in the most privileged of homes where neither money or love would ever again be in short supply; something he wouldn't question until much later on. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Two days later, the family arrived at their final destination; Pittsburgh and after initially checking into a hotel, the Kinney's went house hunting. Having realised it was much easier to take over the established identities of Jack and Joan Kinney than create totally new ones, especially now being hundreds of miles away from anyone who may have known them, this Kinney family soon established themselves in one of the best parts of town. Mysteriously, payments of all monies once owed by Jack Kinney dropped into the mailboxes of all who may have had an interest in still pursuing them and all ties to the old life were severed. The Kinney's were never asked and never volunteered any information regarding their origins or their income, as they seemed to fit right in; thankfully that wasn't the done thing and they had the appearance of a well-established, rock solid family and it was assumed they were from old money. Given, they were a little older than most parents of children Brian's age, but it was assumed they'd had to wait to be blessed with Brian's birth and they were obviously a loving and close family. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Do you think he still remembers anything?" asked Joan, a few days after Brian's sixth birthday. For she had noticed for some time now how Brian had occasional nightmares; something the boy didn't understand and would go to her afterwards for a hug and a drink of warm milk before being settled back down to bed. "It's possible," agreed Jack, as they were sitting at the kitchen table, having put Brian back to bed after one such nightmare and staying with him until he had fallen asleep. "From what Jonathan said it wasn't a terribly happy home … something from that time is bound to remain". "Then we must do all we can to erase such dreadful memories," said Joan and she placed her hand on her husband's and grasped it tightly. To think that Brian might still be suffering from the experiences of his early childhood was more than she could bear. "I agree … but we cannot progress yet … not until Brian is old enough to fully understand his destiny can we begin his teachings. Until then all we can do is ensure he has all the love and care two parents could lavish on their child … that and the best education money can buy … and hopefully that will prepare him for the task he will be undertaking". ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Whilst trying to bring Brian up as normally as possible, the years that followed took him to the most exclusive academies available and his parents ensured that no part of his education was lacking. And by his mid-teens, Brian knew how to dress, which wines to order at dinner and his manners were impeccable and everyone in his parent's ssmall circle of friends said what a wonderful young man he was becoming. It was also instilled in him from an early age the ability to know what was right and wrong; when an injustice had occurred and to be forthright and honest and to know whom around him was honest in return and who could and couldn't be trusted. His parents always emphasised the need to be careful with whom he made friends, using the excuse of their wealth as being a source of people's jealousies and urged Brian to be careful about who he took into his confidence and allowed to get close to him; teaching him to be strong and to conceal his feelings. Though still too young to be able to understand the teachings yet to be passed on, what they were now beginning to prepare Brian for, of course, was the day in which he took up the mantle of protector and leader; knowing anyone close to him could be used against him and that an enemy might see any display of emotion as a weakness; something to be exploited. Therefore, childhood knocks, bruises and setbacks had been brushed aside; tears over a cut knee or a disappointment were never allowed to be shed; at least not in public and Brian soon realised the only way to protect himself from possible hurt was to allow nobody to get close to him or allow anyone or anything to touch him. It wasn't difficult; he'd never really been encouraged to make friends or join in the usual groups and consequently, he had no friends outside of the kids he came into contact with at school; sons and daughters from equally privileged backgrounds with equally careful parents it would seem and Brian would become wary of anyone who tried to make friends with him. Jack and Joan knew this was setting him apart and could see the dangers of Brian growing up isolated and alone. But that was his destiny; something he would learn to endure. However, something was having an effect on Brian in his teens. The realisation that he was indeed different to the people he came into contact with and not just because of his privileged background. For Brian was beginning to question his sexuality: realising he spent more time watching the football jocks then he did the cheerleaders with their short skirts and pompoms. Brian was growing taller and stronger every day and his looks hadn't gone unnoticed by all around him. His own passion was soccer and he was soon playing for the school team and instrumental in their winning game after game and was made team captain; normally the object of many a young female student's attentions and earned more than just a few questioning glances when he spurned their advances. The other team members didn't mind of course, when the girls' attentions were aimed in their direction instead and even started to accept Brian's apparent indifference and aloofness towards everyone around him. But soon, the communal showers after every soccer game became something he dreaded, especially when the older students wandered through; still on a high from having won a game and often messing around and half naked and, to Brian's horror, his body was starting to react. He began to wait until most of the guys had taken their showers before he took his turn, using the time tidying up the sports equipment to keep his mind off their naked bodies until the showers had virtually cleared. Brian cooled the water temperature down as far as he could and took his time; the locker rooms had emptied by the time he'd got out and towelled himself down and dressed, but he could still hear water running as he was about to leave and he followed the sound to the soccer coach's quarters and stood in the doorway, watching the man in his private shower. He was beautiful; in his late twenties or early thirties; tall and well built and Brian stood mesmerised as he watched the water running down the man's muscular naked back, strong legs and perfect ass. Soaping himself down, the man slowly turned around in the cubicle; he had an erection and had already begun to stroke himself under the hot water. Sensing someone else's presence, he turned to face Brian and they stared at each other for several long moments before the man reached out and pushed open the cubicle door and without a word spoken by either of them, Brian got in the shower fully clothed. The taller, older man smiled down at him; placed his hand under Brian's chin and tilted the young man's face up towards his own and he lent forwards, barely brushing Brian's lips with his own; teasing him, leaving him questioning how it would be to kiss him; his erection pressing against Brian's body. He placed his hands on Brian's shoulders and, holding his gaze, pushed him slowly to his knees. Paying no attention to the water soaking through his clothes, Brian took the man's leaking cock slowly into his mouth. Fighting down the gagging sensation as the older man's member hit the back of his throat, Brian was held firmly; the man's hands in his hair; pulling it slightly as he fucked the warm, soft mouth. Inexperienced as he was, Brian could hear the moans above the sounds of the rushing water; a sound that thrilled him to know he was the cause of the man's pleasure and that, for a few minutes at least, he was in total control; the man completely lost in what Brian was doing to him; engrossed in explicit pleasure and unable to stop himself. Then, as the man came, Brian tried to pull away, but he was held in place by strong hands and was forced to swallow the man's seed; the bitter taste lingering in his mouth. Now soft, the man relinquished his hold and Brian staggered to his feet and searched the face looking down at him for any kind of reaction. There was none and after his soccer coach turned off the water and stepped out of the shower he reached for a towel which he tossed back to Brian. "Dry yourself off … I'll find you something to wear …" Slowly, Brian stepped out of the shower and stripped off his sodden clothing and towelled himself down. His head was reeling with what had happened and he'd hoped for some sort of response from the man whose dick he'd just sucked off, but the man's coldness towards him was like a slap in the face. He threw some sweats and an old tee at Brian, who caught them and now, embarrassed at what had passed between them, hurriedly dressed. "You better not tell anyone what happened here," said the older man, poking Brian in the shoulder and Brian could barely nod his head in agreement as the man turned his back on him and finished dressing in silence. Still not fully understanding what had happened, Brian grabbed his belongings and rushed home. His parents knew something was obviously wrong, he was exceptionally quiet at dinner and excused himself to go to his room early, saying he had a lot of homework to do. Jack and Joan let him go, knowing he'd been taught that he could talk to them about anything and that he would eventually come to them when he was ready to do so. That night, Brian couldn't get out of his head what had happened in the shower and replayed the scene over and over; remembering how good it felt to be totally in control of the man's pleasure; his body. And Brian knew now for sure that he too must be gay. His Mom and Dad had always encouraged him to talk to them; saying there was nothing that couldn't be discussed between them. But how the hell could he let them know their only son was queer? Eventually, sleep of sorts came, but then Brian had one of his recurring nightmares. It had been a while since the last one and he thought he'd got over them. He didn't understand them, but he had the overwhelming impression of being in a car and then there was a terrible noise and he was thrown clear and suddenly found himself outside of the vehicle. The next thing he remembered was his Mom smiling at him, picking him up and carrying him away. He'd never asked Jack or Joan if they'd ever been involved in a car accident and they'd never mentioned it. Maybe something too awful had happened that made them want to forget it; maybe someone had died. But whatever happened, Brian knew it was important: important enough for it to keep coming back to him in his dreams. The next day, still tired from lack of sleep, Brian sought out his soccer coach, only to be totally ignored by him other than a few withering glances telling him to keep his mouth shut. Brian's emotions, usually so well hidden, this time were hard to hold in check. To be totally rejected like this hurt as much as if he'd had a knife thrust into him. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Still trying to sort out in his head what was happening to him, Brian decided to take a completely different route home from school this particular afternoon; one that meant a much longer walk and giving him time to think and which took him through a part of town he never usually ventured to. He saw the scuffle as soon as he turned the corner; the three much older kids pushing the younger one off the kerb: the car sounding its horn as it swerved to avoid him. Then, one of the older boys picked something out of the kid's school bag and threw it in the street and tripped the boy up as he tried to retrieve it. "Hey … leave him alone …" Brian broke into a run and threw his own school bag down into a doorway and pushed the older boy aside: now standing between him and the kid on the ground. "Don't tell me …" laughed the older boy. "You're a cock sucker too …" and he pushed back at Brian before one of the other boys took his arm. "Leave him, Dan … it's not worth getting into". Not sure that he'd heard correctly, Brian squared up to boy addressed as Dan, who could see the defiance in Brian's eyes and realised he'd be no pushover; not like the other kid. Maybe it was three against one: totally discounting the kid still on his knees, but even with those odds he didn't like their chances and slowly, the three older boys backed off and then turned and hurried away. Stooping down, Brian took the younger kid's arm and helped him to his feet. "Are you okay?" he asked, concerned for the boy. The kid was clearly embarrassed at having to be rescued by a complete stranger and he slowly looked up into Brian's face. "Th … thanks" came the stuttered reply as he stared into those beautiful hazel eyes and Brian nodded. There was a moment's awkward silence and then Brian spoke again, introducing himself. "I'm Brian … Brian Kinney … you should get that looked at ..." He could see the kid was about his own age, though smaller in build and that a slight bruise was starting to appear on his cheek and he lightly touched the boy's face with his hand. The boy stared at him and put his hand up to his cheek; brushing Brian's fingers as he did so and Brian removed his own hand from the boy's face. "Ouch … yeah … I guess I should" came the reply and the kid inspected his jacket; the sleeve was torn. "Mom's gonna kill me when she sees this," he sighed and he picked up his school bag as Brian stepped back and bent down to pick up from the ground what had been thrown there; it was a comic book. "Captain Astro?" asked Brian and he smiled at the boy as he handed it to him. "Yeah … he's my favourite … I've got quite a collection now," and Brian could see by the sudden light in the boy's eyes how excited he was at the mere mention of his hero's name. "I prefer Superman myself …" stated Brian and the two teenagers smiled at one another and the Brian picked up his school bag and the two of them fell into step as they walked together down the street. "Oh, by the way … it's Michael … Michael Novotny" and the boy smiled across at Brian. "Well, pleased to meet you, Michael," smiled Brian in return. After a few moments of silence, Brian knew he just had to ask; he wanted to know what the older boy had meant. "What was that all about … why were they picking on you?" and his companion shook his head. "It's … it's nothing" he answered him and Brian placed his hand on the boy's arm and stopped him from proceeding any further. "It didn't sound like nothing to me". Michael sighed and had rolled up his comic in his nervousness and couldn't look his new friend in the eye. "It's just … it's just they think I'm gay … `cos I'm not into sports … and girls …" "Are you?" Brian asked him and finally, Michael looked up at him. Searching Brian's eyes, Michael knew somehow, that he could tell him anything and he took a deep breath before speaking. "Yeah … I am," he answered softly, and he moved away from Brian's touch and turned and carried on walking; dreading the reaction his statement would fetch, but once more, Brian fell into step beside him. "Well," offered Brian. "If it means anything … I am into sports … I'm captain of my year's soccer team …" and he hesitated. "But I'm not into girls either …" and he shot a glance at Michael and grinned. Comfortable in each other's company, the teenagers chatted as they continued down the street; or at least Michael chatted and Brian listened and then, finally, Brian looked around. "Where are we headed?" he asked him as they turned the corner into more unfamiliar territory. "The diner on Liberty Avenue" answered Michael, pointing to an establishment less than a hundred yards down the street. "My Mom works there …" and Brian suddenly stopped dead. Liberty Avenue, the gay area. He'd heard about it; who hadn't? But to suddenly find himself in the heart of the gay community made Brian's heart beat faster and then when a man in his mid-twenties openly cruised him, the look of shock on his face made Michael break into a huge smile. "You're gonna get a lot of that" he grinned and taking Brian by the elbow, he steered him down the street and in through the doors of the diner. It was the noise of the place that hit Brian first of all; the juke box; the constantly ringing bell from the kitchen signalling another order was ready for collection and the loud chatter of the diners; all talking at once and it seemed at the top of their voices. "Hi Mom," without hesitation, Michael headed straight for the woman with bright red hair and clothes which obviously matched her loud and lively personality who was delivering meals to the occupants of the corner booth; exchanging banter with everyone she spoke to and then she turned to look at him. "Hi sweetheart." Having put down the plates, she took her son's face in her hands and kissed his forehead. Abruptly, she pulled back. "Christ … what happened to you?" and she lightly touched the bruise turning a nice shade of purple on his cheek and saw the tear in his sleeve. "Ouch … it's nothing … don't fuss". "Those older kids again … huh?" she asked. "You're gonna have to start sticking up for yourself more, Michael … let me get an icepack for that," and she turned away from him and headed for the freezer. "Who's this?" she asked, for the first time noticing the tall, good-looking kid standing behind her son. "Mom … this is Brian. He stopped this from getting any worse," admitted Michael and his Mom stepped towards him and placed the icepack on her son's cheek. "Ow … ow" complained Michael, taking the pack from her and holding it in place himself. "Well, it's nice to know there's still some chivalry left in the world …" and she turned to Brian. "Thanks Brian … for coming to my kid's rescue like that …" but all Brian could manage was a shrug; still trying as he was to take in his surroundings. Debbie smiled at her son and then back at Brian. "This your first time out on Liberty Avenue?" she asked him and Brian nodded. "Is it what you expected?" and Brian coughed: unable to speak. Two young men in their late teens stopped to hug and kiss by the counter as they paid for their meals and Debbie chuckled. "Well … you're not running away screaming … so I guess that means …" and she looked back from Brian to her son. "Brian's gay too, Ma," stated Michael and he looked back at Brian. Debbie Novotny smiled at both boys. "Thought as much. So … you hungry? You hungry, Brian?" and then she answered for both of them. "Well, I guess that was a dumb question … when aren't teenage boys hungry? Take a seat kids … what'll it be? Burger and fries okay?" and the two boys nodded and moved into a vacant booth. "Mikey, is your Mom really okay with it … you being gay I mean?" whispered Brian in disbelief. He could never imagine his own Mom being so totally comfortable, not only in the company of gay people, but knowing her own son was gay too. "Sure," answered Michael, casually. "In fact … it sorta was Mom who told me I was gay … so I didn't feel bad about having to tell her myself." Debbie brought over the boy's meals and placed them on the table before them. "There you go kids. Brian … do you need to ring your Mom … tell her you'll be late?" but Brian shook his head. "No … it's okay … I'm not expected yet". Truth was, he was supposed to be at soccer practice, but since the encounter in the shower, he'd been trying to steer clear of the coach as much as he could and had feigned a headache in order to skip the session. He wouldn't be missed from home yet for another couple of hours. The time seemed to go by really quickly; both boys had homework from their respective schools and whilst Michael waited for his Mom to finish her shift, he often stayed at the diner to complete his assignments and Brian took this opportunity to do his homework too. Debbie often glanced over at them and kept them supplied with sodas whilst they worked and occasionally went over to chat with them when she had a moment to spare; she was glad Michael had made a friend and another gay kid at that. But there was something about Brian she couldn't put her finger on. Maybe he was still a little nervous about being in the gay part of town; maybe that was something he was still coming to terms with. But whatever it was, he seemed to maintain a little distance whenever she spoke with him. Any question she asked him about himself and his family was answered politely, but with the minimum of information and she wondered why he seemed to be holding back. Most teenagers she knew, well at least her Michael, never seemed to stop talking and in the end she decided that maybe Brian was just the more serious type who always considered everything he was going to say before he spoke. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Meeting up with Michael after school on several days a week and heading for the diner became a regular occurrence over the course of the next few months and Brian's parents knew he was deceiving them; a source of great disappointment for them. "Where have you been Brian?" asked his Father, finally, as his teenage son returned home one evening and Brian hesitated on the stairs before finally turning around. "With a friend" came the quiet reply. "Who is this friend?" asked Joan, having heard her husband's question and joining them in the hallway; keen to hear what Brian had to say. "Just a friend" continued Brian, shrugging his houlders. "What have we told you about being careful about the friends you make?" asked his Father. "What's his name … where does he live?" "Well that's just it," said Brian, raising his voice. "I don't really have any friends … you won't let me see anyone outside of the kids at school. I'm surprised you don't escort me there to make sure I don't speak to anyone …" "Brian … don't you dare speak to your Father that way … and that isn't fair … we've never stopped you having friends … we've just told you to be careful who you choose …" "But how do I know if I've made the right choices if you don't let me try?" demanded Brian: his voice even louder. "You've never let me bring anyone back here to watch a video or just hang out … Okay … so I go to the odd barbeque with a few of the kids from school … but you always have to know exactly where I'm going and who's gonna be there … and then you take me there and bring me back like some little kid …" "We've always trusted you, Brian," assured his Mother. "No you don't," he yelled back. "Or you wouldn't be asking me questions now," and with his eyes blazing, Brian turned and ran up the stairs. "We have to talk to him …" whispered Joan, but Jack put his hand up to stop her. "No … it's too soon. We mustn't forget … in every other way, Brian is just like any other teenage boy …" "No, he isn't," she insisted. "We know more about Brian than he realises and that isn't being fair …" but her husband shook his head. "We can't get this wrong, Isantha," he whispered; using the name she'd long ago discarded. "Too many people will come to depend on him … he's still too young to understand what will be asked of him. For the moment we must treat him like any other teenager …" "What … keeping him from making any friends at all?" she interrupted. "I know he will have to protect himself … but surely he will need people around him he can trust and they will need to know him in order to do that". "I know what we agreed … but surely we can't ask him to go through life with no one to love him at all. We won't be around forever …" she reminded him. To be continued.