Chapter Two
First Time
(memory, in the middle of the night)
It’s late that same Friday night, or maybe it’s very early Saturday morning. Justin hasn’t looked at the time. He silently plods down the large stairway, making no noise since everyone is sleeping. Unable to sleep, he goes down to the kitchen to get a glass of water. It’s so calm outside he can hear the ocean hit the shore and owls and crickets singing outside in the night. The wooden stairs creak under his bare feet. He looks out the windows, the lights outside are dimly lit around the house and he can see lampposts far away on the large rocks on the shore.
Justin stares, shocked to see Brian outside at this time of night. The tall, dark stranger is smoking, sitting on the porch’s railing, his feet brushing against the rosebushes. He looks quiet and calm. Justin wants to talk to him but can’t. He doesn’t want to disturb him. Instead he watches him carefully. Silky-brown hair caresses the rim of his dark grey sweater, tight against his long, lean back. His jeans are riding low on his hips, showing a hint of smooth, tanned skin above his waist. His long legs are hanging above the red roses. He brings the cigarette between his lips and blows the smoke out, long and deep.
He smirks and tilts his head slightly. He walks silently away from the window and heads into the living room. “Hey.” Justin hears a low whisper. Nikko’s sitting with his knees to his chest on a one-seat chaise lounger. “Hey. What are you doing here? It’s late.” Justin whispers and kneels on the hardwood floor beside Nikko.
“I should ask you the same question?” Nick says and drinks a sip from a glass of water he’s holding.
“Are you having second thoughts?” Justin asks, his eyes drifting momentarily from Nick to Brian. He sits down on the floor and leans his head against the armrest.
“No.” Nikko says. “I’m just thinking, you know.”
“Nervous?”
“Terribly.”
“It will be fine. You love her, that’s all that matters.” Justin says.
“Yeah. Hope that’s true.” Nick says.
“Nick?”
“Uh?”
“Who’s Brian?”
“Brian.” Nikko says, his eyes quickly shifting to the man sitting in the dark outside. “Brian is the guy who steals everyone’s heart by the first glance.” Nick pauses. “We met while I worked as a waiter, shortly after you left high school. That’s when I met Rachel, she was a waitress too. Brian was singing on stage every Friday and Saturday night with some friends of his.”
“You heard him sing?” Justin glances from Nikko to Brian.
“Yeah. He sings well. His voice is very impressive and deep. I guess it’s because he smokes so much.”
“Brian’s the beautiful one, that’s who Brian is.” Nikko drinks the rest of his water.
“So, any girl in your life?” Nikko asks softly, breaking the silence.
“Um, not really.”
“Not really as in ,‘no there’s no girl’, or not really as in ‘there is a girl but I just don’t want to talk about it’?”
“Not really as in, no.” Justin pauses. “There’s no girl.”
“You’ll meet her one day; you’ll meet her like a prince and a princess. In a castle with singing animals.” Nikko says, his eyes closed.
“You’re talking nonsense, just like in high school.” Justin laughs.
“I know. I’m tired.”
Justin moves to the couch and lies on his back, leaning his head on a plum flower-patterned cushion.
“Let me sleep, evil witch!”
Justin laughs and throws a cushion at him.
Honk! Honk! Hoonnk!
Justin wakes up startled, jerking his body up straight. People are honking their car horns impatiently. He was still on the couch he had fallen asleep on the night before. A soft wool duvet covered his body. Justin stumbles off the couch and walks at a slow pace down towards the entrance, rubbing his sleepy eyes. He takes a look outside. Nikko and his friends are in his convertible, standing or sitting down. Another car is leading the way to the large gates. Justin walks outside the house.
“Hey Justin! We’re going for a ride, wanna come?” Nikko calls out loudly to him, waving his arm.
“Nah. I’ll stay here.” Justin says, still standing on the balcony.
“You sure?” Nikko asks. The car’s motor is rumbling. Justin nods. Nikko yells something and they drive away, leaving dust clouds forming behind as the car speeds off.
Justin walks back inside the empty house, surprised when he sees Brian standing in the middle of the hallway. He somehow forgot how to breathe for a moment. They’re both standing still, their gaze fixed on each other.
“Hey.” Justin softly speaks.
“Hey yourself.” Brian replies calmly.
He strides across the hallway, passes Justin, brushing his arm very slightly, and leaves the house. Justin looks behind to see Brian walking away, the door swings as it shuts. Justin goes up the stairs to take a shower. The hot streams of water hit his skin and wash away the sweat and dirt off his body. He steps out the tub, leaving wet puddles of water on the bathroom tiles. He gets dressed; putting on his ripped jeans, a black well-used shirt that fits well against his upper body and a grey sweater, leaving the zipper undone. His long blond locks are half-dry, combed with his fingers but still messy.
He goes down the stairs, his steps echoing in the large empty house. He strolls into the garden. There’s a fountain in the middle, spilling water in different directions. There are red roses and large willow trees that look like they are weeping as the wind blows through the dark grey-green leaves. A sudden feeling of yearning to paint and sketch bugs him and he curses himself for not thinking of bringing his sketching pad. Far in the sky, he can see large rain clouds forming and moving closer in their direction. It’ll rain soon.
“Hey.” Brian says softly as he comes up close behind Justin. Justin turns around shocked. Brian’s standing so close.
“Sorry. I didn’t want to startle you.” Brian apologizes. His hands are warm in his pockets. Brian smiles nicely, biting his bottom lip.
“It’s fine. Just didn’t expect you.” Justin brushes his blond strands away from his eyes.
“Sometimes good things happen when you least expect it.”
Justin smiles and he can feel a shiver run down his spine.
“I’m going for a walk.” Brian pauses and wet his lips. “Walk with me?”
There’s nothing but grey sand and dark-blue, endless water. They stroll along the shore, talking about everything and nothing, laughing and apologizing for things that happened in the other’s life that wasn’t their fault. Time passed quickly for them both even though it had been a few hours. Little tiny raindrops fall on their skin. The rain cloud has become larger and is looming above them now. The raindrops become bigger and fall more frequently. Once they get back to the house, they’re soaked to the skin and their clothes are completely drenched. Brian shakes his head and drops from his long wet brown locks flick onto Justin’s face. “Hey.” Justin huffs in a half-laugh tone.
“Sorry.” Brian utters. He grabs a duvet from the couch and wipes his face. He covers Justin’s head playfully and gently rubs Justin’s wet hair with it. It’s suddenly silent. There’s only Brian and Justin, not moving, staring intently and deeply at each other. Brian blinks. He stares at Justin’s slightly open, wet lips. Drips of rain trickle down their cheeks and chins like tears, their warm, erratic panting caressing the other’s skin. Brian thinks about kissing him, so does Justin. But their heads turn quickly towards the door when Nikko and his friends come back.
“Bachelor party!” One of the guys yells out.
The lights were either dimmed or turned off. Empty beer bottles, sparkles of confetti and broken glass lay spread around the rooms. Brian stares to the side at Justin who’s talking with Nick over the music that’s blaring through the speakers. “Hey, Kinney, over here.” A guy calls out to Brian. Justin watches as a tall, light-brown haired guy whispers something in Brian’s ear. Brian smiles widely and walks away, his eyes shifting for a second in Justin’s direction. Justin quickly looks back to Nick.
Ding! The doorbell rings. A couple of guys open the door to let a stripper come in. Nick pretends like he didn’t know. She’s tall and slutty, wearing long, black leather boots that reach her knees and a long coat that hides her half-naked body. All the guys are onto her. She walks into the center of the room and does her thing for Nikko. Justin leans against a doorframe pretending to be interested. Brian sees that. He walks across the room and stands close beside Justin. Justin tilts his head in Brian’s direction and looks straight into Brian’s golden-hazel eyes.
Brian leans into Justin. He reaches behind Justin’s thigh to find his hand and caresses the soft, inner side of his wrist with his finger tips. Brian glares at him, his lips closed with a serious look of his face. He slowly walks away from Justin, heading towards the stairway while smirking at Justin. Justin exhales and follows him. They step upstairs without anyone seeing them. There’s no one on the stairs or the second storey. When Brian reaches the third step he grabs Justin’s hand firmly in his.
He pins him gently against the bedroom wall, making the dresser and lamps shake with the impact. It’s dark. Only the light from under the closed door peeks out. Brian has both Justin’s wrists pinned beside his shoulders, their necks extending to each other. Brian barely touches Justin wet lips, he looks in the blonds’ eyes and leans in to kiss him passionately; his mouth slightly opened against Justin’s. Justin interlaces his fingers through Brian long locks. Their cold hands touch each other’s skin under the hem of their shirts. They unbutton their jeans and pull off their dark shirts above their heads, tossing them aside. Brian steps backwards, never letting go of Justin’s lips. He pulls Justin with him into the bedroom by placing his hands on his hips and pulling the waistband of his jeans. Justin wraps both arms around Brian’s neck and deepens their kiss by holding him closer.
They pant heavily against each other’s mouths. Brian lies on top of Justin. Their skin is moist with beads of sweat and the heat from their bodies forms steam on the cold, closed windows. They’re staring at each other. Justin realizes that Brian has the most beautiful hazel eyes he has ever seen. Brian leans over and kisses Justin softly. He’s still buried deep inside him. “You okay?” Brian whispers and swallows hard. Justin nods, still panting quickly. “Yeah.” Justin responds softly. He kisses him again, this time for much longer.