OK here is the brand new chapter *grin* Enjoy it (at least I hope you will ) ------------------- When Brian woke up , he didn’t have to open his eyes. He knew that Justin had gone. **flashback** When Brian came home from New York he was trembling. Justin was gone. He hadn’t been at the hotel when Brian had checked. Had Justin come back to Pittsburgh? Was he back at his mom’s? Brian dialled a number he had never thought that he would dial. After three rings someone picked up. “Hello? This is Brian Kinney. Is he at your place?” “No.” he heard Craig’s cold voice before Craig ended the call. Where was Justin? Where else could he be? Maybe he was at Daphne’s. He pulled out his cell and dialled her number. ***** Meanwhile at Daphne’s “Justin! You have to tell him that you are back” “No, he doesn’t care. Just… promise me that you won’t tell him.” That’s when the phone ringed and Daphne answered. “Hello?... Hi Brian… “ She looked at Justin and saw his pleading eyes. “… no, I haven’t seen him since he ran to New York… yeah… bye” ****** Brian walked over to the sofa and sighed. He grabbed the bottle of JB which was next to the sofa from before he had left for Chicago. He drank straight from the bottle, staring into space and then threw it against the wall. Where was his Sunshine? He knew he needed his Sunshine in his life! Brian stood up and smashed everything he could get his hands on, kicking chairs over, even laying in to the TV. Suddenly, the door was opened and Debbie came in. Brian looked at her and tears were now streaming down his face. It was all his fault that Justin had left. Deb just held him as he cried. ************* Meanwhile Justin sat at Daphne’s and helped her pack. In a few days they would graduate and after that they would leave good old Pittsburgh and start a new life in New York, a life without Brian Kinney. ********** After Debbie left, Brian called the number of a private detective. But he did not find Sunshine. No-one could find him. Maybe Justin didn’t want to be found. *flashback end* His hand slid over Justin’s side of the bed, the sheets were cold. Brian pulled his hand back and stood up. He went to the bathroom and emptied his bladder. Then he went downstairs. Why had Justin left? Brian leaned on the counter, trying to understand. Why could Gus be happy? Hell, why could everyone be happy except for him? Why had Justin left him again? Didn’t Justin love him anymore? Brian felt empty and upset. He could feel himself shaking. Brian grabbed a plate from the counter and smashed it on the floor. It felt good. He threw a cup, a glass, a bottle. Blind with rage and distress, he threw whatever he could find to the floor and against the walls, relishing the noise and destruction he was causing. All around him were shards of plates and cups and bottles and but Brian didn’t care. He grabbed the barstool and smashed it on the floor. Tears were running down his face, when the door was opened and Gus walked into the house. He heard his father sobbing and he rushed into the kitchen, wherehe found his dad standing in the chaos and Gus was shocked. He had never seen his father like that. "Dad?" Brian did not respond. “Dad! What the fuck is wrong?” Gus yelled, wondering what had happened last night. Brian looked at his son. He hadn’t noticed him come in. Brian straightened up and looked around, realising what he had done and paled. The kitchen was completely devastated. “I… I don’t… He…” Brian didn’t know what to say and Gus didn’t know what to think. “Sunshine left.” Brian turned and rushed out of the house without another word. He couldn’t let Gus see how vulnerable he was right now. How could he be a role model for his son, when he was like this just after seeing his ex? Now Gus was completely stunned and angry. Who the fuck was this Sunshine? And what had the asshole done to his father? He had to be a total shit to hurt his dad like this. He had never seen his dad cry...ever. Gus had to find out more about this man he had never heard about before today. He pulled out his cell phone and dialled the familiar number. “Kyle? Get your ass over here, I need you” ***************** 20 minutes later Kyle knocked on the door, which Gus opened immediately. Kyle was pulled inside the house and he stared at Gus. “What the fuck is going on?” He asked, concerned when he saw Gus’s expression. “I… Dad… he… God! I came home this morning and he had destroyed the whole fucking kitchen!” Gus exclaimed. “We have to… I need to know who Sunshine is.” “Who the fuck is Sunshine?” Kyle asked. He didn’t know what was going on. “ Are you deaf? I just told you I have to find out who the fuck Sunshine is! I only know HE is the reason why my dad freaked.” Gus stomped upstairs and Kyle, now confused, followed his angry boyfriend. He saw Gus walking into his father's bedroom. “Gus? I don’t think that is a good idea.” “Why the fuck not? I don’t think I’ll find anything about the asshole anywhere else!” Kyle looked at his man and frowned. He then stepped into the bedroom and shut the door. “Ok, I’ll help you but when your dad comes it was your idea! Where is he actually?” Kyle really respected Brian and he had no desire to go snooping in the man’s past. “Don’t know. He stormed out after I found him.” Gus said grumpily and pulled a box from under the bed. He opened it and shut it as soon as he saw what was inside. “Ugh… I don’t think these will help us that much. Kyle scooted over to Gus’s side and looked inside the box. It was filled with dildos and other sex toys. Kyle gulped. “Yeah… I guess you are right.” Gus pushed the box back under the bed and opened another box and found what he was searching for. In the box, there were magazine and newspaper articles and photos of a blond teen. Kyle and Gus stared at the photos and then at each other. No, this couldn’t be real. “What the fuck are you doing in my room?” An angry Brian stood in the doorway glaring at the two boys kneeling on the floor next to his bed. He snatched the photo out of Gus’s hands, closed the box and pushed it under the bed. “Get the fuck out, now!” he growled and turned his back to Gus and Kyle, who left the room immediately. Gus stopped just before he closed the door and turned to his dad. “Dad? I… I didn’t mean to…” Gus sighed when Brian ignored him and lay down on the bed,still holding the photo. This had not gone like he had wanted it to. Now he was the one who had hurt his dad by snooping in his things. ********** Kyle and Gus left the house and walked down to Liberty Avenue. Neither one said anything until they reached the diner. They were greeted with a bone-crushing hug from Debbie before they sat down in a booth. “What crawled up your asses?” Debbie only had to take one look at her boys to know that something was up. “Kiki? I’ll take a break now.” she said and sat down next to Kyle. “So?” Gus and Kyle looked up and stared at Debbie. “Grandma? Can I ask you something?” Gus asked with a small voice. This was all too weird. Debbie nodded slowly. Since when did Gus ask permission to ask a question? What was going on? What had Brian done now? “Uhm... what happened between Dad and … Sunshine?” Gus looked in Deb’s eyes and Kyle held his breath. They needed to know what had happened in the past. Deb paled. How did the boys know about Justin? “I’m not sure if this is my story to tell…” “So you know him?” Kyle asked, now as curious as Gus. “Yes, I know him... he, he left Pittsburgh a long time ago and it’s really hard for me to say but he broke Brian’s heart. You should have seen him. He was dev-“ “Devastated? Let me guess, he smashed everything he had in his loft?” Debbie only nodded. “How do you know that? Has he told you?” Gus shook his head, trying to hold back his tears. “No, I found him like that this morning and he… he said that Sunshine left.” Deb didn’t know what Brian meant. Had he seen Justin? Was Justin back in town? Or was Brian just reliving old memories? The bell over the door rang, indicating a new customer. Deb looked over and her chin hit the table. In the doorway stood her lost boy. “Sunshine? Is that you?” tbc