I have to thank my wonderful BETA Lucel. She makes my writing skills look damn good. She did an absolutely wonderful job on this long chapter. Thank you.
Brian's POV: I’ve been standing here at the bar of Forever Young for about three hours now, and the little shit still hasn’t shown up yet. I have no idea what’s taking him so long, and I have run out of patience. So I head up to the top floor and over to the bar. Unfortunately, the same bartender is working tonight. Fuck! If I go up to him and ask him again about Justin, it is sure to get around the club that the stud of Liberty Avenue has a thing for the most infamous exotic dancer in Pittsburgh. I mean it’s not as though people wouldn’t understand the attraction or anything, but I don’t want people knowing just how much he has gotten under my skin. But I guess it’s a moot point now. I know either way I am going to ask him; I just have to know otherwise it’ll drive me crazy just continuing to wait down here. When I get up to the bar, the bartender looks over to me with the sexiest grin he can muster and makes his way over to me with the bottle of Beam in his hand. He flips a glass over and fills it nicely, and right as I reach for it I ask... “Does Justin have another dance tonight?” I watch as his smile falters, but I don’t give him any acknowledgment of it, as I take my glass and throw back the shot, wincing a little at the burn. It’s really the first real drink I’ve had all night. I wanted to make sure I had all my wits about me when we came face to face. I refuse to fuck this up again, it’s going so well. I look at the bartender again giving him an expectant look. “No,” he says, and I know I must look surprised. “He left about an hour ago,” he continues, and I feel my brow furrow. I just don’t understand this. Everything seemed to be going so well at his car tonight. Then I feel myself getting angry. He stood me up. The little fucker. Nobody has ever stood me up before. What the fuck was he thinking? Was he just fucking with my head? When I feel myself wanting to grab a hold of the bartender and shake the truth out of him even though I know, for a fact, that he has no idea what is going on with Justin. I know it’s time to leave, so I turn abruptly and walk out hearing the bartender in the distance, but paying him no attention. Right now I could care less for the little known rule. Fuck the bartender! Fuck Justin, and fuck everything else. I can’t believe I’ve let him get under my skin like this. Well, it all stops now! I’ll just avoid him until I know I won’t be affected by him anymore. It’ll work. It has to work. Nine day’s later... a Tuesday. Well I haven’t run into Justin since the family dinner; I have been trying to get him out of my head, but all I can think about is him. The way his face lit up when my son asked for a hug. The way he softly smiled at me when I had him in my arms and led him to Deb’s kitchen. The way he felt in my arms. The way he smells, and god the most intoxicating of all is the way his lips felt against mine. It was only a brief kiss, and damn how I wanted it to last longer, but it was enough to remember. Hell, it was more than enough to remember. It had this feeling, a feeling that I couldn’t place until about just an hour ago, and well, knowing what the feeling is now is just so confusing and very unbelievable. The feeling was belonging. It was as if I belonged there. Which I know, I know, is absolutely ridiculous. I can’t believe what is happening. And even though it is absolutely ridiculous to feel this way, I can’t help it, and I can’t help this overwhelming feeling of having to see him. I know it’s a stupid decision. But what can I say-- all rational thought goes right out the window when I think about him nowadays, and I just can’t deny myself any longer. I have tried to stay away and to forget about him, but the longer I have stayed away, the more I think about him, and the more I think about him, the more I want to see him, to feel him against me again, to kiss him once more. Just anything right about now, I can’t take the distance any more. So I decide to go see him, but then the thought occurs to me that he doesn’t work at the club until Friday. So I won’t even be able to. This situation is just so fucked up in so many ways. It seems every time I want something, or decide something, it always has a block on it. Why is this so hard? I have never had this much trouble with getting a guy... but then again, I have never wanted another man like I want him. So I guess I’ll just have to suck it up. No pun intended. I push those thoughts aside a little, but of course, not completely, because I can’t help but be excited to go to work today. If you can believe that, it seems that every Tuesday there have been some ideas and boards waiting for me in my office. I tell you, it has been great, somewhat working with this guy. He seems to know exactly what I’m looking for just from looking at my written ideas. Not to mention he adds onto the ideas I have. It’s amazing the campaigns we’re coming up with. The customers are flipping over the art work and ground breaking turns we are taking to get the ideas across. It really has been a perfect collaboration between us. I have left notes asking him to let me know who he is. I told him he wouldn’t get into trouble, but he never mentioned it in his replies. I even went as far as leaving a check for him on my desk hoping he would take it not only because he deserved and earned it, but because we could find out who he was when he would have to write his name in to cash it, but that was a no go as well. I came into the office last Tuesday to find the checks torn up. I personally cannot believe that anybody would choose to rip up thousands of dollars. It’s just beyond belief. However, I’m going to find out who’s been doing this for me even if I have to hide under my desk next Monday night. Which I know is an unbelievable thing for someone like me to do, but I need to know who this guy is. But even with all my excitement, I have promised Mikey I would meet him and the guys for breakfast today since I haven’t really seen any of them since we had dinner with Justin. See, that just goes to show you how hard I have been trying to stay away from Justin. But that’s all shot to hell anyway since I have already decided to see him as soon as possible. I finish putting on my suit, tighten my tie, grab some files from my desk and place them in my briefcase, snap it shut, grab my overcoat and slip it on, grab my keys then the briefcase, and head out to the diner. FYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYF Justin’s POV: It’s been nine days! Nine days of fucking hell! I have been obsessively thinking of nothing but Brian. The way I felt in his arms, the way he smells, the way his lips felt on mine. The way he looked with his son, absolutely gorgeous. God, nothing is going right in this situation anymore. I thought that if I had no contact with him everything would be ok. I’d get over him. But the whole thing is backfiring on me. I think I finally got through to Brian and got him to give up this stupid little quest, I mean he hasn’t been waiting for me in the parking lot anymore or watching me dance, which is the only place he really knows to find me, so I am just guessing that he’s given up. But the thing in all this fucked up situation, and the scariest part as well, is that now deep down inside, I am hoping that he hasn’t given up on me. How completely fucked up is that? I know it’s wrong to want that since I know he only wants one thing, but I can’t help myself. Not seeing him these past nine days has been hell. Especially since I still have some contact with him. I am in his office every Tuesday helping him with his ideas, giving him my thoughts on his campaigns, and it’s been great, don’t get me wrong, but I miss seeing him, hearing his voice, looking into those gorgeous hazel eyes. I found myself sketching him time after time. I must have at least a whole sketch book (collectively that is) of his face and body. It’s so frustrating because it happens without my knowledge most the time, just like that first painting. Not to mention the three other paintings of him sitting in the very back of my closet, behind boxes of crap. How pathetic is that? Regardless, I can’t help it. It just happens. I have even found myself enjoying them. Finding him staring back at me, is just breathtaking. I know all this is extremely mushy, and I want to kick myself in the ass for it but what can I say? In my mind this is the truth, and I never lie to myself. Well, I almost never lie to myself. Anyway, I promised Debbie that I would stop by the diner this morning and that’s where I am heading right now with my portfolio packed full of artwork and my satchel full of books and the three papers that are due today. I feel as though I am about to fall over from the weight, but I struggle down to my car and get everything situated before I take off. I was a little apprehensive about going to the diner though. I wasn’t sure if she was trying to set me up or not. But she very conveniently let drop the fact that Brian hadn’t been to the diner since before we had that family dinner, so I feel a little better about going. However, I am still on guard because with Debbie you just never know. When I get to the diner it’s not very packed. For which I am grateful since I hate mornings, and well... people too. I have a ton to do today, and I just like my mornings to be quiet. Even though I can’t have total quiet, I enjoy the fact that nothing is blaring in here. I sit down at the counter and wait for Debbie to... “Sunshine!” I guess I didn’t have to wait long. “You made it. I’m so happy,” she says coming to give me a kiss and wipe off the bright red lipstick she left behind. “I told you I’d be here,” I tell her as she goes to the back of the counter and grabs the pot of coffee. I turn my cup over for her to pour the coffee. Yeah, need lots of caffeine. “So what’s up?” I ask her, because she usually just waits for me to show up. She never asks me to show up unless something is up. “Nothings up. I just missed you, that’s all,” she says with a smile. I hear the bell over the door ring, and I look up quickly getting a nervous feeling in the pit of my stomach, but it’s just some guy walking in… a hot guy, but definitely not Brian. Jesus, Justin, calm the fuck down already. “Really? Well I missed you too,” I tell her with a smile. She smiles back. “So how is school and work going? Are you slowing down a little?” she asks. “Work and school are both fine. But they are both the same schedule...” “Ah Jus, baby, you need to take a break and enjoy life a little. You’re still so young.” she says concerned. “Deb, you and I both know I had to grow up pretty fast, and I’m not about to slow down when I don’t have that much longer to go...” she interrupts me yet again. “See, you don’t have that much longer to go, so why can’t you just take a little break?” Shit, she’s got puppy dog eyes. I didn’t think moms had those in their arsenal. I look down into my coffee cup. “I can’t take a break because I want to be the best at what I do. I can’t take a break because I have bills to pay: two colleges to pay for and art supplies that are in constant need of refilling. I can’t slow down because I can’t afford to. If I do, everything that I have worked for goes to shit, and I didn’t work my ass off for the last six years to let that happen. So could we please move on from this. I love ya Deb, but please, just let me get through this last year,” I tell her sincerely at the end. I don’t want to get mad or have her mad at me, but she has to understand why I am doing all this. It’s not for kicks; it’s a necessity. I wish I didn’t have to work so hard, that I didn’t have to dance to be where I am, but I have to take care of myself; no one else is going to do it for me, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I don’t want to be dependant on anyone but myself. “I know, baby. But I can’t help worrying about you. I love you as much as I love my own son, so see, a mother has a right to worry about her boy,” she says patting my cheek, and I feel myself smile at her words. She is just like a second mother to me, and to tell the truth, I wouldn’t have her any other way. She could never take the place of my mother, but damn she makes a damn good second mom. “I know, Deb. I love you too.” “Ok, ok, enough of this. What can I get you sweetie? On the house.” she asks pulling out her pad and pencil. “Deb, I haven’t needed a free meal for years now. Give it to someone who really needs it.” She gives me a huge smile. “You got it, Sunshine.” “Alright. I would like some blueberry pancakes, a side of ham, some hash browns, and another cup of coffee, if you please,” I request tapping my cup. “You got it.” She refills my cup, and just as I am finally settling down and feeling a little more comfortable, the fucking world seems to implode as Brian walks through the door. Now I know I thought the same thing before, but this is the feeling I remember: the pull of his stare. I have to seriously fight myself not to look, because I want to look so badly. But I won’t let myself. If I just sit really still, maybe he won’t even notice me. Oh, what the fuck am I thinking? It’s not like this place is so big he can miss me. Hopefully he’s too pissed at me for standing him up, to bother talking to me. But of course I’m not that lucky, because he decides to sit right next to me. Fuck, he smells fucking good. “Deb, some coffee please,” he says nicely, and calmly. I don’t bother looking at him. I know he’s staring at me. Instead, I look at Deb as she pours him some coffee. But the way she is mouthing ‘sorry’ to me, I know she had no idea he was going to be here. “What can I get for you Brian?” she asks. “Just a donut, please.” “Sure sweetie, and I’ll be right back with your order, Sunshine,” she says with an apologetic smile. I give her a sweet smile back letting her know that it’s alright. “So, Sunshine, how’s school?” he asks, and I feel my brow furrow with confusion. I figured the first thing out of his mouth would be ‘what the fuck happened to you?’ However confused I am, though, I refuse to look at him knowing I might get lost in his eyes and say something I’ll regret. “School’s good,” I reply, simply. Good, simple answers I can do. “Um hmm, and work; how’s work?” “Good.” There, ha! I can do this. “That’s good... so would you like to tell me why you ran out on our dance?” ah, I knew he wouldn’t let me off the hook with that one. “Were you scared?” “Scared of what? You?” I ask with a laugh while accidentally looking at him. I quickly look away. Damn, he looks good! “Scared of the way you feel about me, maybe?” he questions, and fuck, how does he always manage to hit it right on the mark? “You are seriously delusional. You know that, don’t you?” I tell him. “Hmm. You seem to be the only one who thinks so.” “Maybe I’m the only one who isn’t wearing rose colored glasses?” I counter. “That could very well be. But I’m still not hearing this fabulous excuse I’m sure you have for breaking a promise.” A promise? “What promise?” I shake my head. “I never promised you anything.” “You said we would have a dance. So what happened?” I fight with myself not to run because that is all that is going through my head ‘run Justin, RUN!’ “I didn’t want you to get the wrong idea.” “What, that you’re a man who does what he says?” he asks, and damn him for putting my integrity into question. I look at him, anger clearly etched on my face, I’m sure. “Look, you were already practically stalking me. There was no way I was going to give you any signs or signals that you might take as me wanting you. It’s never going to go anywhere, so I figured why bother?” he’s smiling. He’s smiling this totally fucking sexy smile that I can feel in my cock, and fuck! I just want to reach over and wrap my mouth around his. “You are so full of shit,” he says looking away from me. “Whatever,” I say looking forward again. Suddenly my plate is sitting right in front of me. “There you go, Sunshine, and Brian,” she sits Brian’s donut in front of him. Funny, I wouldn’t have pictured him the donut type. “Thanks,” we both say at the same time. We look at each other, and he just smiles. I look away and try to concentrate on my food, but he’s now sticking his fingers in my food and popping a piece of my ham in his mouth... “What the fuck are you doing?” I ask. “What?” he asks with such an innocent look-- too bad it just doesn’t look so innocent on him. “Why the fuck are you sticking your fingers in my food and eating my ham? Fuck, who knows where your hands have been?” I say. “I’m sure you can’t wait to find out. Would you like me to give you a demonstration in the bathroom?” he whispers against my ear, and fuck, my eyes close, and my head leans against his nose of it’s own accord. “JT!” I hear, and my head snaps towards the doorway. There coming towards me is Jonathan. I jump up out of my seat and jump into his arms. “Hey baby, I missed you!” he says into my ear. He backs up slightly still holding me off the floor and swoops in for a hello kiss. FYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYF Brian’s POV: What the fuck is this shit all about? One second I have him nuzzling against my nose, and god it felt so good, and his hair: I took a deep breath, and he smells so good. His hair is softer than I thought it would be. I was just about to take him in my arms when I hear someone practically yell enthusiastically “JT!” Before I knew what was happening, he was up out of my range. Then I have to watch him jumping into the arms of some guy who is standing a few feet away. I must say he’s not bad looking, a little taller than Justin with light brown hair, about my complexion. Swimmer build with a little muscle. Yea I’d definitely fuck him if I didn’t hate him so very fucking much. “Hey baby, I missed you,” I hear him say before he leans back and swoops in for a very intense kiss. I feel my mouth drop open at the sight. That little fucker is kissing him. That should be me kissing him right now. And “baby”? What the fuck is that all about? And I do believe that Justin said he wasn’t in a relationship. Was he lying? Well it would explain a lot if he was, in fact, in a relationship. But, no. Deb would’ve said something to me. I watch as they pull back and peck a couple of times before this fucker lets Justin touch the floor again. Jesus, this is not happening. There can’t be another fucking thing getting in my way, keeping him from me, and just as I was making some major head way. “What are you doing here? Why didn’t you tell me you were coming?” Justin asks as he hits the guy in the chest. “Hey, no need to hit me. I’m here for an interview and to see you. But I wanted to surprise you,” the guy says with a huge smile-- perfect smile, perfect teeth. Damn it! “Really? Where are you interviewing? Does this mean you’re staying?” “Damn, JT, slow down a little, will ya?” he says with a laugh before leading Justin back over to the counter to sit down. Justin, I think, has completely forgotten I’m here and is facing this guy. “So?” Justin asks again. “Alright, already. I’m interviewing for an insurance company...” “Oh god Jonathan...” Jonathan, his name is Jonathan, I think with distaste. “Please tell me it’s not...” Justin says sounding a little worried. “Oh God, of course not, JT. Do you really think your dad would give me an interview anyway?” he questions. “You’re right. Ok, then, which company?” he says, his enthusiasm back up. “Jarred’s Insurance,” he says with a smile. “No kidding? This is just too much. You are going to work for Jarred Kennings’. My dad is going to shit his pants when he hears about this. You working with his biggest competitor!” he says laughing. Does he know Jarred Kenning’s? Jesus that guy owns the second largest insurance company in the state. The only company even in the ballpark of Jarred’s Insurance is Taylored Assurance. No way. No fucking way... “Your father’s Craig Taylor?” I find flying out of my mouth...Justin turns to look at me a little surprised. “Yea.” he says turning his attention right back to Jonathan. I see Him look at me over Justin’s shoulder just now noticing that someone else is in the diner. “Hey. Jonathan” he says introducing himself while extending his hand to me. “And you are?” he asks as I reluctantly (although he wouldn’t know that) shake his hand letting go as soon as I can. “Brian Kinney,” I say flatly. “How do you two know...” but he is cut off by the shrill sound of Deb’s voice... “Jonathan! Oh, my god, sweetie! When did you get into town?” she practically yells taking him into what looks like a bone crushing hug. I find myself smiling at that. Maybe she’ll suffocate him, and I won’t have to worry about him anymore. But I find that again, I’m not that lucky as Justin pulls her off of him. “Deb, you’re going to suffocate him...” I can only hope...”let him breathe.” she finally lets him go giving him a huge kiss on his forehead and leaving lipstick that she doesn’t bother to wipe away, and I laugh at that as well. “Oh, sweetie, it’s good to see you again.” “It’s good to see you, too, Deb,” he says taking in some deep breaths. “And it only took you two fucking years to make another visit?” she questions with her hand on her hip... “He’s here for an interview,” Justin says. “Really? Does that mean you’re staying?” Deb asks. I pray the answer is no. “Yep,” Jonathan replies. Damn it! “The interview is really just a formality. Jarred just wants to have everything done by the book.” “Jarred’s Insurance? Oh, Sunshine! Your dad is going to shit when he hears about this,” she says with a laugh. I wonder what that’s all about? “That’s what I said,” Justin chuckles, and they all laugh together now. This is fucking ridiculous. I push my plate away from me. I just lost my appetite. “What’s so funny?” I hear Mikey ask. Fuck, I didn’t even hear the bell ring when he came in. “Oh, nothing, honey. How’s my baby?” Deb asks giving him a kiss. “I’m good. Hey, Justin.” “Hey, Michael. This is Jonathan.” “Hi,” Mikey says, and I find myself getting angry at the fact that he’s being so nice to Jonathan. I know it’s stupid, but this guy is...what? My competition? This just can’t be happening. “Hey, nice to meet you,” Jonathan says as they shake hands. “How do you two know each other?” Mikey asks, and I just want to yell ‘thank you!’ I don’t, however. Of course. But that is exactly what I wanted to know. “Oh, Justin and I go way back. We’ve been friends for a long time. Haven’t we?” Jonathan says practically purring. “Yeah,” Justin says sweetly... fucking sweetly. “Now, now, you two, there will be no fucking in the bathroom,” Debbie says seriously, and it actually makes my skin crawl. But they are both laughing. “Ma,” Mikey says, and I have to say I’m thankful he’s here. I hear the bell above the door ring and see Emmett and Theodore walking in. “What?” she says as though she hadn’t said anything at all. “Justin and Jonathan were always back there fucking,” she adds, to my disgust. “So Jonathan…” I hear Em say. “Are you here to see our Sunshine?” he asks. I look at Em with a very questioning look. But he just looks at me with this goofy innocent smile. Fucker. “Yeah, there’s that, and...” “Jonathan has an interview,” I say. They all look at me, and I find myself the center of attention. Something I didn’t want right now. But the sarcastic remarks just fly out of my mouth sometimes when I least expect or want them to. “Really? Does that mean you’re staying?” Emmett asks. And damn! Will they just let that one die already? “Yep,” Jonathan says yet again, and I tell you, I’m getting very sick of hearing that. Suddenly I feel pair after pair of eyes on me. I take a quick look around, and all of them, well all of my so called friends that is, are looking at me, trying for casual but not quite getting there. I decide the best thing to do is to just ignore them and return to my coffee. “Well, that’s great. I’m sure Justin will be thrilled to have his friend back in town,” Theodore says, and I want to throw my coffee at him, but I refrain. “Won’t you Justin?” I find myself holding my breath... “Of course I will,” he says as though it was the stupidest question ever asked, and I actually feel my heart sink to the pit of my stomach. Shit, I need to get out of this lovey-dovey situation. I don’t know how much more I can take. “How about you, Jonathan? Will you be glad to have Justin around again?” this from Emmett of all people. I swear, I think my friends really hate me. “Oh, yeah,” he says. Do you think I could punch him? “Alright, well I know you two have a ton to catch up on. So we’ll leave you to it. Do you want some coffee Jonathan?” Deb says giving me a sad smile. I wonder if I could get her to tell me the story of Jonathan and Justin? I mean, she obviously knows a lot about them. “Sure, Deb, thanks,” he says, before turning back to Justin and moving some hairs from his forehead. I see Justin’s hand come up and take his and hold it between his two hands. I watch as Deb comes to fill his coffee cup. “Hey, Bri, come sit with us,” Mikey says from our usual booth. I decide that I can probably get a better view of both of their face’s from the booth, so I go ahead and abandon my seat next to Justin even though I would rather be close to him. But right now I need to see what is really going on, and the only way to do that is to watch them and listen very carefully. I grab my coffee and my neglected donut and take my seat next to Mikey. However, I immediately turn my attention back to Justin and Jonathan. “I can’t believe you’re here. It’s good to have you home again. Where are you going to be staying?” Justin asks. Yea where will he be staying? He better not be staying at... “Well, I thought if you haven’t filled my position in our bed...” our bed? “ I could just stay there?” he says with more of a questioning voice. “Of course, you can stay with me. I was hoping you’d want to,” Justin replies. Are you fucking kidding me? “Good!” he says with a huge smile before he takes a drink of his coffee. “So, JT, do you have any classes today?” JT? You know that is like the fourth time he’s called him that. “Yeah, unfortunately I have classes all day. Then I have to work tonight as well.” Justin says with a sad face. “Shit, well when is your next day off?” Jonathan says with a puppy dog face. My god, please! “You know, I don’t have any days off. I am either at work or at school,” he says with a chuckle. Damn he works seven days a week? Plus all the school hours he must have since he’s studying for two degrees. When does the boy sleep? “Jesus, Justin! Are you still working for that same janitor company? You know, they are going to work you to death one of these days. I still can’t believe that they work you seven days a week....” ‘Cough... Cough…’ I hear and see Emmett turn a shade of red. Shit, he must be thinking the same thing I am. He hasn’t told Mr. Past that he works as an exotic dancer. This could be interesting. “Are you alright, Em?” Justin asks. I ‘m sure he’s hoping no one spills the beans that he dances. How he gets himself into these situations in the first place is beyond me. “Yeah, sweetie, I’m just fine.” I can see the nervousness in Justin’s eyes. “We can talk about this later...” Justin tries to change the subject... “No, JT..” there’s that JT thing again. “You need to tell that man at Grey’s to give you a little time off.” Grey’s? That’s the company we use... “See, that’s what I’ve been trying to tell him, but he won’t listen to me. Maybe you’ll have better luck,” Deb says passing through with a tray full of plates. “You know, we just went over this, Deb,” Justin says exasperated. “Yeah, yeah,” she replies. “She’s right, JT. You need a vacation,” Jonathan says. Damn it, there’s that name again. Could he really be the one? No it just can’t be. It’s just too crazy to even contemplate. Or is it? I mean he is a gifted artist from what Deb says. Not to mention the fact that he is attending PIFA. They don’t take just anyone. Then there’s the fact that he is getting the degree in advertising, and he works for the same company that cleans our buildings. “I can’t afford to take a vacation, and you know this. So why are you on my back?” Justin asks losing his patience’s. His initials fit as well. Not to mention the fact that this guy calls him JT. “Maybe, but since I’m back now, maybe you could cut back some...” “Oh, I don’t think so,” Justin says shaking his head adamantly. “What? Why not?” Jonathan says perplexed. “Because I am not going to depend on you in any way,” he says looking pretty annoyed. “You wouldn’t...” “No, I will not do this again. I take care of myself, period. I don’t want anyone else thinking they have to take care of me when I can take care of myself. I don’t need your help,” he says in a tone that is unmistakably closing the subject. “Still as stubborn as ever. You know, you didn’t used to be this way.” “Yeah, well as a very wise man once told me... a guy has to do what a guy has to do,” he says evenly. “Yeah, well maybe I was wrong,” he says softly. Justin looks over to him with a questioning gaze. I wonder what that’s all about? I know it’s making my gut turn. “Look, why don’t I drop you off at school?” he says straightening up. “Sure,” Justin says, a little reluctantly. But he gets up none the less. I watch Jonathan throw a couple of bills on the counter then turn to us. “It was really nice to meet you, Brian.” I just give him a curt smile that I’m sure he doesn’t quite understand. “Michael… and I’m sorry, I missed your names,” he says extending his hand to Theodore. “Ted,” Ted responds with a smile; he also holds onto his hand a little longer than needed. Ew. “Nice to meet you, Ted,” Jonathan says politely while taking his hand back. Oh, I can see the WASP is strong in him. “You, too.” “And Emmet, but you can call me Em,” Em says extending his hand as well. They are all being so proper today. “Nice to meet you, Em,” he says shaking his hand. “I hope to see you all again,” he says before turning around and asking Justin, “Are you ready, JT?” There’s that name again. He nods his head, and as Jonathan turns to head out the door, I see Justin glance my way quickly. We make eye contact, but he turns away right when he meets my eyes, and heads out the door Jonathan is holding open for him. Jonathan looks at me for a minute, and I just raise an eyebrow to him. Right there is when he gets the point. He just nods his head and steps away from the door. I see them taking out a portfolio and a satchel from Justin’s car before getting into another car and taking off. Then, my attention goes back to the gang, but it’s only for a second. “Well guys, I have to get going,” I say standing up and throwing on my coat. “We just got here, and you haven’t even eaten your breakfast,” Mikey whines. “I’m not all that hungry. You eat it,” I say, throwing some money down, and heading straight for the door. I have some investigating to do. FYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYF Justin’s POV: I can’t believe he’s here. My best friend is back. It’ll be good to have him back in my life. He’s really the only person I have ever trusted with my thoughts and dreams, and even though when he left it hurt, we still remained friends. I couldn’t imagine it any other way. However, there was one thing I never told him. I guess I just didn’t want to have to deal with maybe letting him down. With him coming back to live with me, though, I’m going to have to tell him. I mean how else am I going to explain all my outfits? “Listen, Jonathan. I have to tell you something, and I don’t want you to interrupt me.” I see him nod his head “Well, this sounds serious.” “It is.” I twist in my seat so I can face him. “Grey’s isn’t the only place where I’ve been working for the last four years. I have also been working as an exotic dancer,” I say calmly. But he looks over to me with complete surprise, and I have to point towards the road so we don’t hit the truck in front of us. He manages to miss the truck with an ‘oh shit’ thrown in for good measure. Then he slowly pulls over, stopping the car and throwing it into park. Shit, here it comes. “Are you fucking shitting me?” he asks. He looks a little mad. “No,” I say simply. I love simple answers. “Jesus, Justin, what were you thinking?” “I was thinking that I didn’t want to be on the streets, and that I wanted to get my college degrees.” It’s the truth. It’s all I wanted, and dancing was the only way I could make it happen. “There has to be a better way to do that,” he’s says, and I can see the wheels spinning in his head already. “Look, Jonathan. After you left, I did what I had to do to make sure my bills were paid and to make sure my plans for the future worked out. And my dancing it has made everything possible.” I want him to understand. “Well, now you can stop...” he says looking into my eyes. “No, I can’t. I still have another semester to pay for and a ton of art supplies that I use through the year. Plus all the bills...” “But now I’m back, and I can help with all of that,” he says sincerely, and I do appreciate the thought, but I’m still not giving up my income. “I know you could, but the thing is, I like the way my life is. I like knowing that I don’t have to depend on anybody for anything. It’s the way I want it. Do you understand?” “No, I don’t...” he replies. I sigh and rub my temple to try to ease the throbbing I can feel starting. “But I’ll respect your wishes.” See, he’s a great guy, and he always knows when to back off and respect my wishes. Even though I thought this was going to be a lot harder for him. I’m grateful he’s not going to try and butt in. “Thank you,” I say with my sunshine smile and lean over to give him a soft kiss on the lips. “Alright, I guess we better get going. Wouldn’t want you to be late for class,” he says with a smirk. Then he just pulls back into traffic. “So when is your interview?” I ask him. “It’s at two o’clock. I figured I would head back to the apartment after I drop you off and get a shower. Is that alright?” “Of course it is. What kind of question is that? You’ve always been welcome. You know that. Shit, you still have your key,” I say with a laugh. “I know, but I just wanted to make sure.” “Well, there’s no need.” “Alright then.” We pull up to PIFA, and he parks the car and turns to me with a very sexy smile. “So what time is your last class?” “It’s at four o’clock, which means I’ll probably be done around five, five thirty. Why?” even though I have a pretty good idea of why he’s asking. “Well, I figured I could pick you up, and we could go out and celebrate my new job, and us being back together again.” I’m kinda confused at first about that last comment, but then I just shake it off, I’m sure he didn’t mean anything by it. “That sounds perfect. I’ll meet you back here then?” “Yeah, I’ll be here waiting,” he says leaning over to give me another kiss which is much deeper than the last, and takes my breath away a bit. Damn, he always was a great kisser. He pulls back, and sweeps the hair from my forehead before saying, “It’s good to be back home.” I smile at that. “It’s good to have you home,” I say as I open the door and get out. He hands me my satchel, and I grab my portfolio. “Good luck today, and tell Jarred I said hi.” “Thanks, and I will,” he says with a smile before I close the door and watch him drive away. Then I head up to my first class. FYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYF Brian’s POV: After I left the diner, I headed straight for work. In my office I found yet another check torn up and six amazing boards for a new campaign I’m designing. I had left a very simple idea of the type of campaign I wanted and how I thought it should kinda look. What he’s produced is of course beyond my dreams. The boards really are eye catching and straight forward in the slogan. It’s just what I was thinking. I stop for a second and really look at the boards. I try to see if these things could come from someone like Justin. But no matter what I think, I know how to learn the truth. So I page Cynthia and ask her to find the number for Grey’s Cleaning Service. About five minutes later, she taps on my door before entering. I’m still studying the boards. She looks at the boards with me then says, “The boards are really amazing this time. Not that they weren’t before, but these, these are really eye catching!” “Yeah, it’s exactly what I wanted and even better than I imagined,” I say then turn towards her. “Did you get me the number?” she turns to me and nods her head. “Yeah.” She hands me the paper with the number, and I take it. God, I am about to find out the truth! I have this feeling that I already know who’s been doing this for me though. “What do you need the number for?” she asks. “Hmm? Well, I think I may have figured out this whole fairy thing.” “Really? You think it could be a janitor?” she asks skeptically, with a scrunched up nose. “It very well could be,” I tell her, simply as I reach for the phone and dial the number she gave me. “Cynthia, could you please?” I ask motioning to the door. “Oh sure, boss,” she says and vacates my office... Ring.....ring....ring.. “Hello, Grey’s Cleaning… how may I direct your call?” a lady answers. “May I speak with the manager, please?” I ask. “One moment please.” I hear a short play of elevator music, then the phone ringing again. ‘Ring....ring’ “Hello, this is Jeffrey. How may I help you?” an older man answers. “Hello, this is Mr. Kinney from Vanguard Advertising...” “Oh hello, Mr. Kinney, how are you doing today?” he asks sounding a bit surprised. “I’m doing well. But I was wondering if you could tell me if you have a Justin Taylor working for you?” I ask getting straight to the point. “Why, yes sir, we do.” “Ok, is he by any chance working in my building on the executive floors?” This is what I really want to know. “Um, yes sir, he is. Has he done something?” he asks, and what can I say to that. “Yes. He has left some ideas for me when he has worked in my office. I just wanted to thank him.” That should be good. “Thank you for your help, Jeffrey,” I say and hang up. My god, it is him. He’s even more amazing than I thought he was. He’s so smart and incredibly talented. I have to get him to work here. We are going to make a kick ass team. We’ll take the advertising world by storm, and maybe we could even open up our own company. Wouldn’t that be something? I mean, hell, with our talents the two of us are going to be raking in the money, we won’t have any trouble opening up an advertising company. Plus, we could take all my clients and any that he gets with us. I feel a huge smile come over me. I can’t believe he’s been under my nose the whole time. I wonder if Debbie knew? I’ll have to ask her when I go down there to talk to her about that Jonathan guy. Damn this is just perfect. See, I knew he liked me. “Cynthia, cancel my appointments for today and reschedule them,” I tell her as I gather up my things and start heading out the door. “What happened?” she asks as I pass her desk. “I’ll tell you tomorrow when I get it all figured out,” I tell her walking away. “Okay.” I leave the office and head straight for the diner. I need a lot of information, and Debbie is the only one that can give it to me...well at least she’s the only one who will give it to me. I’m pretty sure Jonathan and Justin aren’t going to volunteer the information. When I finally get into the diner I sit right at the counter and I watch as Deb comes out of the back and spots me. She’s got big eyes, and I know she knows why I’m here. “I’ll be with you in just a minute,” she says to me. “Let me just make sure all my customers are good.” I nod my head and wait for her to finish up. About five minutes later she comes to the back of the counter, grabs the coffee pot, and fills a cup for me before putting it back and turning to face me. “I suppose you want to know the back story of Jonathan and Justin?” she questions. “I am pretty curious about that. But we’ll get to it in a minute.” “Ok. What else did you want to know?” she asks. “I wanted to know if you knew all along that Justin was the one leaving me the ideas for my work?” I watch as her eyes get huge and her mouth drops open. Yep, she knew. “Well?” I ask again with both eyebrows up. “How did you find out?” she asks, amazed. “Well, when Jonathan came in calling Justin ‘JT’ that was one clue. Then he happened to mention that Justin works for Grey’s, which is the same company we use. So everything seemed to match, and when I got to work this morning, I called the company and spoke with the manager, and he confirmed that Justin was working in my building and on my floor; and now any doubt that I had left, you took away with that look,” I say with a smirk. She nods her head. “You’re not mad at him, are you?” “Of course not. His work is absolutely amazing, and he has saved my ass more than once. Not to mention that he seems to know exactly what I want from just a little idea I have. He’s amazing.” “You sooo like him.” she sing songs. “What are we, five?” she just laughs and shakes her head. “Well, you do, don’t ya?” she asks with a silly girly smile that makes me grin back. “Yeah, alright, so what if I do?” I say defiantly. I gotta keep up appearances even though I know she can see right thru me. She always could. I think that’s why I love her so much. Because no matter what I do or what I say, she will always know the real me, even if she plays along with me sometimes. “Good. I’m glad.” I just nod my head letting that conversation die as I bring up another. “Now why don’t you fill me in on the Jonathan and Justin thing. They looked awfully comfortable together,” I say taking a drink of my coffee. “Yeah, well they have been friends for over six years now...” hmmm. “So they’re just friends?” “No, not exactly. See, Jonathan took Justin’s virginity.” oh shit. A first love. Damn it! “They lived together for a year. Now I won’t tell you how they came to live together. That’s something that Justin will have to tell you.” I just nod my head in understanding. Some things should come from the person concerned. “So they lived together and fucked together for a year before Jonathan moved away to go to Dartmouth.” “So it’s the story of lost love?” “No. Not at all, actually. They were never in love that way. Sure they loved each other as friends, best friends, but they never fell IN love. They never had a closed relationship by any means. I mean, they tricked together, and they fucked each other. But it was never a ‘this is my boyfriend’ type of thing. Justin has told me himself that he never loved Jonathan that way. They were just friends with benefits. I guess they just really liked fucking each other,” she says shrugging. Well, damn. Even though she is saying this, I know one thing doesn’t ring true: the look in Jonathan’s eyes when he looked at Justin. That look was more than just ‘I love my best friend.’ I’ve seen that exact same look in Mikey’s eyes. That’s the ‘I want more than just friendship’ look. “Yeah, well I’m pretty sure Jonathan doesn’t feel the same way.” I say looking at her. She furrows her brow. “What do you mean?” she asks. “I saw the way he looked at Justin and that’s not just friendship I see there. He’s in love with Justin and I’m pretty sure he’s come back for more than just a job and a friend.” “No that can’t be. I mean...” “Yea it can.” I say but I neglect to tell her about the look that passed between Jonathan and I. We both know we want the same man, and we pretty much told each other ‘let the best man win.’ I know it’s so cliché’ but it seems to be where we’re at. “Well I still think your wrong.” I just snort at that and sip my coffee. “He’s always been very protective of Justin. That’s probably all you saw.” “I doubt it. But hey you’re going to believe whatever you want to.” I tell her. “Oh Brian. It’s just to silly to even think of.” I just nod my head to the side and leave it at that, as she walks off to her customers. I leave a ten and make my way to the door. I know what he wants. I jump into the Jeep and make my way home. I need to really think about what my next move is going to be. But when I started to think about this morning I start to get pissed off. I know this morning he was starting to turn. Starting to let himself give into what we both want, and now, now I have a whole new obstacle to over come. Not that I won’t. But the question is how. I’m not entirely sure how Justin really feels about this Jonathan character. He could quite possibly be in love with him for all I know, and if that’s the case how do I compete with that? Well, I guess that’s a simple answer...I can’t. Shit! Why is this shit so complicated? The first time I am ever, I mean ever, interested in a guy and this is the way it has to play out? It’s just too unreal sometimes. This shit just isn’t supposed to happen. FYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYF Justin’s POV: As soon as my last class is over, I head straight out to the parking lot where I’m to meet Jonathan, and sure enough, there he is leaning against the hood of the car. When he spots me, he stands straight up with a huge smile on his face and holds out his arms. “You are looking at the newest employee of Jarred’s Insurance,” he says as I walk up to him. When I get to him, he wraps his arms around my waist, and I stand on my tippy toes. “Well then, let me give you a proper congratulatory kiss,” I say as my lips meet his. When he is properly congratulated, I pull back. “Mmm, damn you have the best kissing lips ever,” he says leaning his head back. Then he meets my eyes again. “Have I ever told you that?” “Ahh no, I don’t believe so,” I say. “Well, you do,” he says leaning in to give me a peck. “Ok, so I figured we could go back to the apartment so you can shower and change real quick. Then I have reservations at 7 o’clock. Is that all right?” he says leading me to the passenger side. “Yeah, that should be perfect timing. I don’t start until 10 o’clock tonight,” I say as I sit down in the car, and he smiles. “Good,” he says before closing the door and going around to his side. When we get back to the apartment, I start the machine... there is a message from Jeffrey... “Justin, this is Jeffrey. Listen, your jobs tonight have been cancelled, so you won’t need to be there... but I’m going to need you to come into the office tomorrow afternoon, after your last class, of course. We’ll talk then. Bye.” I feel my brow furrow, and I shake my head. “Well, that’s a little strange,” I say, pushing the off button since there were no more messages. “I’m sure it’s nothing. Now go on and get ready, so we can really celebrate,” he says with a huge smile, which I return. “Okay, I’m going to get in the shower,” I say and turn around to head for the bathroom. I can afford one night off, and it is his first night home after all. Plus, it’ll be the first night off I’ve had in six years. Jesus, that’s a long time. So I’m just going to enjoy myself. I deserve it. By the time I’m ready, it’s time to get to the restaurant. So we head out and go to this nice quiet place called Silver, that he and I went to a couple of times when we wanted to celebrate. I really love this place: it’s so small and classy, yet very quaint in the way they treat their customers. After we get seated and order, we finally have some time to catch up a little. “So tell me, how’s Jarred doing? I haven’t talked to him in like three years,” I begin. “He’s doing really well, actually. I swear, the man never ages. I can only hope to age that well,” he says with a laugh; I chuckle as well. The man must be somewhere in his late fifties, but he doesn’t look a day over 32. It’s actually kinda creepy how well he looks. “He asked about you.” “Did he?” “Uh hunh. He said we should go over to his house for dinner sometime soon. I guess Trudy has missed us.” Trudy, Jarred’s wife, is extremely waspy and the total opposite of Jarred. She is, however, one of the greatest persons you could ever meet. She and my mother were best friends before my mother died. So she holds a lot of secrets to my mother’s life that I would never have known otherwise. Not to mention that after my father threw me out, they still remained strong figures of understanding and love, for Jonathan and me, for which I will be forever grateful. “Yeah, after you left and my life got thrown into high gear with work and going to two colleges, I just ran out of time to stay in touch,” he looks at me with a raised eyebrow. “I know it’s a lousy excuse, but it’s true. Life just got in the way.” “Well, that may be, but they really miss you and love you and would like to see you,” he says pouring us some more wine as our food is placed in front of us. “Alright, I’ll call Trudy and set something set up for us. Is that better?” “Much... So how’s school going?” he asks. “It’s going good. I’m right where I want to be.” “At the top of your class?” he says sarcastically. “Of course,” I say with a shit eating grin on my face. I deserve my placings; I work damn hard for them. “Good. So I have to know, where do you, you know, dance?” “At a club.” “Alright, smart ass.” “On a stage.” “JT!” “Oh, you’re no fun...” “I’m tons of fun, you know that better than anyone.” Now he’s the one with a shit eating grin. “True, true. I work at a club called Forever Young.” “I don’t think I remember that club. Is it new?” “Yeah, just opened up a few months ago. It’s a really great club. If you want, we can go there after we eat,” I say. “Ok, sure. I miss dancing with you.” I give him a smile. “Mmmhmm.” He kinda clears his throat, and I look at him and see that he’s looking a little pale, “I wanted to um...” he stops and takes a drink of water. “Are you all right?” I ask him. “Yeah.” He kinda fidgets in his chair and furrows his brow before he looks at me again. “I wanted to ask you...well first I wanted to tell you something, oh, Jesus, I didn’t think it was going to be this hard.” He’s got me worried now. “Jonathan, you know you can tell me anything.” I see him nod but he doesn’t say anything else. “Jonathan, are you ok? Are you sick...” “Oh no, JT, it’s nothing like that.” “Ok then, what, because you’re really starting to freak me out here!” I tell him reaching across the table to grab his hand. Maybe give him a little courage, not to mention to ground me a little bit. “When I came back two years ago, it was sort of a test for myself.” “I don’t understand. What kind of test?” “See, when I moved away, I started to realize these feelings I have... for you.” Oh, shit. “I thought with time they would just go away. I mean, we’re best friends, we’ve had sex hundreds of times! I took your virginity, so I thought it was just some weird withdrawal thing.” I take my hand away from his and grab my glass of wine to take a nice long drink of it. He does the same before continuing. “But when we wouldn’t talk for over a week, I would miss you so much, I couldn’t wait to hear your voice, just the sound made my week. I couldn’t bring myself to be in any kind of a relationship, because I kept comparing every guy I was with to you. For three years I fought with this, and so I decided to come and see you, to see if the feelings were real, if everything I was feeling was true.” My mouth is hanging open, and I don’t know what to say. Am I supposed to say anything in this situation? He’s looking at the table... “So I came here, and seeing you standing in the airport, I just knew that everything I felt was right; it wasn’t just withdrawals or whatever... look JT, sometime, I’m not even sure when, I fell in love with you.” Oh, fuck! “I didn’t mean for it to happen, but it did, and I came back here this time to see if we could try to have a real relationship.” I can’t believe this, how did this happen? “I thought you came back for a job...” I say completely perplexed at this situation; I really never saw this coming. “I was offered many jobs, in many different cities. But I chose to come here so I could be with you.” My god, this was never supposed to happen. “I don’t know what to do with this. What do you want me to say?” I ask him; I don’t know what to do. He’s my best friend; I don’t want to hurt him. “Just think about it. Ok?” he asks me with big eyes. I do love him, but I just never considered us likely to go to that place... but looking into his eyes, I know he wouldn’t ask me unless he was serious, so I nod my head. “I’ll think about it,” I say simply, and right away a huge smile and twinkling eyes replace his pleading eyes. From there, we finish up our dinner and talk a little more about his school, and what he’s been up to since we last talked, which was fairly recent since we just talked a week ago. We finish up dinner and share a slice of chocolate heaven, which is a piece of rich chocolate cake with this chocolate raspberry frosting. God, I swear, it is the best thing you have ever tasted. “Do you still wanna go dancing?” he asks me, and I hesitate just a second before I decide that until I can make up my mind about all this, I’m just going to act like nothing’s happened. He’s still my best friend, always will be, I hope. “Yeah, let’s go.” When we get there, I bypass all the shit and have him park in the back where the employees park. We go in through the employee entrance. Sometimes it’s good to be a dancer. “This place is amazing,” Jonathan says as we walk into the main floor. “Yeah, it is, and this is just the first floor,” I say wiggling my eyebrows and watching as he gets a huge smile across his face. “Wanna get a drink?” “Absolutely.” So I take his hand and lead him over to the bar. “Hey, Kane!” I yell getting the bartenders attention. When he looks over, I give him a sexy little grin. He’s a gorgeous man, 6'0 tall with the perfect amount of muscle. No body fat anywhere in sight, milk chocolate skin, shaved head, and light brown eyes. “Hey, handsome. Did you come to take me home tonight?” How cute is that? This big man was asking if I’m here to take him home. He’s been trying to get me in bed since he first started working here, about a week ago. I would’ve fucked him, but there’s just one problem: he works here, and so do I. “Not tonight, big guy,” I say sweetly. “Well, if you’re not here for me...” he says while pulling up a shot glass. “Two please,” I say, and he looks up, finally seeing Jonathan. They nod to each other and Kane pulls up another one. He pours us out two shots of Beam. “Here you go boys. On the house.” Then he goes to take care of the other guys. “Are you sure you’re my best friend, JT?” Jonathan says, and I turn towards him. “What? Of course I am,” I say not understanding what he means. “Then why in the hell haven’t you fucked that gorgeous man?” he says slamming back his shot. I laugh and nod my head, I can see what he means now. “I don’t fuck people I work with,” I say simply, and he seems to get that. “Come on, lets dance,” he says and pulls me into his arms. We weave our way through the crowd ‘till we get to the middle of the floor. Then we just automatically start to move against each other, just like we used to do. I can feel eyes on me from every direction...but in my line of work, you learn how to block it out. Until I feel that all too familiar pull, which gets the best of me... I look over, and there he is, standing on the stairs. Our eyes meet, and I can’t break the contact. He starts to walk down the stairs, and we keep eye contact until he’s in the crowd... “JT...JT?” I snap out of the trance. Damn it! I’m losing control when it comes to him. Snap out of it, already. “Are you ok?” “What? Hunh? Oh yeah. I’m fine.” I say and try my best to lose myself in the dance, to forget he’s here. But it doesn’t work, and I knew it wouldn’t... “May I cut in?” oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck! Please not now. Jonathan looks over to Brian, and I refuse to look at either of them. “Um...” Jonathan says looking from him to me. I barely glance towards him before he looks back to Brian. “He owes me a dance,” Brian says simply, and at that I look directly at him. He’s got this look on his face that I’ve seen before. It looks sincere, but I don’t trust him as far as I can throw him. However, I don’t want him to make a scene. I feel Jonathan look at me again, but I can’t seem to look away from Brian. “Alright,” he says letting me go and moving off to the side. “JT,” he says, and I seem to snap out of the trance, and look at Jonathan. He smiles at me and leans in to give me a peck on the mouth. Which I feel really funny about getting in front of Brian, which is stupid since I have never felt funny about getting a kiss from him, and we kissed in front of Brian at the diner... “I’ll be at the bar,” he says and moves away from us through the crowd. When he disappears from my sight, I’m not sure what to look at now. I don’t want to get caught up in Brian’s gaze again. He’s got hypnotizing eyes, I swear it. The way they swirl with their colors is amazing in the strobe lights. When I feel Brian’s arms go around my waist and pull me into his body, I have to bite my lip to suppress the moan that wants to come out. God, he feels so good against me, his hard cock pushed against my leg. When we start to move against each other, the friction is just too much for me, and my dick is hard within two seconds. My eyes close, and I feel myself relax into his touch, despite my fight not to. I want him so badly, more than anyone I have ever wanted, and I’m losing the fight to keep him at arms length. I knew this was going to happen. I’m so fucked! FYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYF Brian’s POV: FINALLY! Finally, I have him back in my arms. I was so surprised to see him here tonight. But when I saw him across the dance floor, he must have felt my eyes on him ‘cause within two seconds he was looking into my eyes. For a minute or two, I couldn’t move I was so scared that if I broke eye contact he would disappear. Stupid thought, I know. So I made myself move; I had to get to him; and surprisingly enough, Jonathan didn’t even put up a fight. My dick was hard from the moment I touched him, and when I got him against me, his cock was hard for me. When I finally feel him relax against me, I let myself relax as well. I slouch down so we are face to face. I look at him, and he has his bottom lip in between his teeth, and his eyes are closed. His hands are holding onto my biceps, and he is still keeping some distance between us. However, that is just not going to do tonight... so I pull him flush against me, and when I do his eyes open wide, and I’m right there to look into them. I can see the surprise in them, but there is also something else. If I’m right, which I usually am, it’s definitely the look of want and lust, with a hint of need. He has such deep blue eyes. I have never seen anything like them. We’re barely moving. When he looks away from me, I take my hand and put it under his chin, gently bringing his face back to look at me. When he looks into my eyes again, I use my hand to bring his face to mine. With our eyes never leaving each other, I let my lips touch his in a light kiss. When he doesn’t pull away, I trace my tongue against his bottom lip. I feel them open the slightest bit, so I trace back on his top lip, and as his tongue lightly touches mine, I dip my tongue into his mouth. My eyes close just from the simple taste of him; it’s chocolate, raspberries, and beam, with a taste that must be uniquely his. I run my fingers up his neck and into his hair; the kiss seems to deepen on its own, though, so I just run my hands through his hair. God, it’s so soft! I feel him tighten his grip on my arms, then he’s pushing me away. I’m a little disoriented and even a little weak in the knees from the kiss, something I can’t ever remember happening. He’s still gripping my arms and I haven’t let him go, but there is a gap between us now. When I open my eyes he has a smirk on his face. “Not bad, Mr. Kinney, but I’m still not going to fuck you,” he says sarcastically. “And why is that exactly? Because I see it in your eyes...” but he interrupts me. “You’re delusional, you know that? I have never met a man that was so full of himself...” so I interrupt him. “Maybe, but at least I’m honest about what I want. At least I’m willing to go after it,” which I can’t believe ‘cause I have always said never go after any man.’ But look at me now. “I am honest.” I snicker at that. “And I have told you exactly what I want. However, you seem to think that it’s ok to just push yourself on me anyway. Now, why is that?” he asks me. It’s true. I have been pushing myself onto him but... “Because I can see in your eyes and in the way you look at me that even if you say you don’t, you do...” “Jesus, you know what? I’m not going to do this with you anymore...” when he tries to pull away from me again, I hold him tight and use what I have left. “Then tell me why you helped me with my accounts?” I ask him. He stops at that and looks at me completely surprised. “I don’t know what you’re talking about?” he tries, but that isn’t going to work. “You know exactly what I’m talking about. So tell me why,” I demand, softly though. “Deb tell you? Is that how you found out?” he says curtly. “No... actually, it was Jonathan.” “What? He didn’t even know,” he says incredulously. “Maybe, but he gave me everything I needed to figure it out.” He shakes his head, and I can see he doesn’t understand, so I elaborate. “Firstly, he called you JT. That’s how you signed your work. Then he mentioned Grey’s, and obviously I knew that, that’s the company we use for Vanguard. I also knew that we used them Monday nights and every other Thursday.” I can see the different clues settling over him. But I continue. “I also knew that you were studying for your degrees in art and advertising, and everything just fell into place. However, I wasn’t completely sure until I called your company.” I see him get big eyes. “And I asked if you worked at my building and in the executive offices. When they said yes, I knew almost completely that it was you.” “Fuck,” he says quietly and hangs his head down. “What?” I ask him. “Nothing,” he says not looking at me and pushes me away hard enough so I can’t hold on. He turns and heads out through the crowd. I try to follow him but it’s as though the crowd just swallows him up, and locks me out. Fuck! FYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYFYF Justin’s POV: I push Brian hard enough to get myself away from him, and move as fast as I can to the bar. I grab Jonathan who was talking to Kane and kiss him as hard as I can. When I pull away, I whisper into his ear. “Let’s go home, I wanna fuck all night long.” I feel him shiver against me, and I just grab a hold of him and pull him back behind the curtain and out the door. I don’t look back; I don’t want to know if Brian is right behind me. When we get into the car, I don’t wait for the questions I’m scared are coming, and I don’t want any small talk either. I just want to lose myself in a night full of fucking. So I figure why not get started right now. He never could resist my blow jobs, and it should keep questions and talk down to moans and groans...exactly the way I want it. So I reach over and unbuckle his pants, he looks over to me with a little, almost shy, smile... “What are you doing?” he asks looking back at the road. I pull his half hard dick out, and I lower myself over him. “Oh, it’s been far too long since you’ve been with me,” I say. He looks at me while I maneuver myself between him and the steering wheel. I start by licking around the head of his dick, and I feel it twitch in my hand. “God,” he whispers, and I smile to myself, nope he never could resist. I work my mouth around his cock taking him deep inside, letting him feel the back of my throat. I feel his hand tangle into my hair and him pulling on it slightly. I keep going at an intensely slow pace, one that I know he won’t be able to handle for long before he starts pumping his hips to get his dick farther and deeper and faster into my mouth. I have gotten good at what I do. So much so, that I can take that kind of pace and intensity without a gag reflex. I know we’re close to home, we only live about 15 minutes away, so when I feel him yanking on my hair and barely pumping his hips, I go all the way down so he is against the back of my throat and swallow and suck until I feel his cock throb and taste his cum spurting into my mouth. I swallow and lick until he’s done, and when he is, I gently tuck him back into his pants buttoning him up. “Jesus, you still have that magic touch. Fuck, that was good.” We’re pulling into the underground garage now and into the assigned parking spots. “Just good, hunh? I thought you always said I was the best?” I question as we get out of the car. When I get to his side, he throws his arm around my waist pulling me against his side and nuzzles my neck as we walk. “Oh, I did, and you still are. Trust me, there is no one that can top one of your blow jobs,” he says kissing right behind my ear, then sucking on the bottom of it. We make it to the elevator, and I push the button for the 11th floor, right before I get pushed against the back wall and feel his lips pushed against mine. I let myself get lost in the kiss, trying to forget the feelings that are swirling around in every part of my body. He was always a good kisser, so I let him take me away. Then he pulls away from me and starts for my neck. I hear him say, “Oh, JT, I want you so bad,” just as the door to the elevator opens up. I move us out and towards the door to the apartment. I manage to unlock it, and get us in while he’s licking my neck and unbuttoning my pants. As I close the door and lock it, he is pulling my pants down to my ankles and going down with them. He gets on his knees, and suddenly without warning, my cock is in his mouth, and he’s so good at this. Jesus! I almost forgot how good he is. I feel my cock hit the back of his throat, and he swallows around it, and I know I won’t be able to last long. He swirls his tongue and sucks the head when he comes up, but he’s relentless and goes right back down. He’s at an almost frantic pace, and I can’t hold on as I feel him swallow one more time around my cock and squeeze my balls. I cum down his throat with a cry as he sucks and licks me clean. When he stands back up, he kisses me, I open my mouth, and his tongue greedily licks every part of my mouth. I can taste myself on his tongue, and he moans into the kiss. With my pants still around my ankles, he sweeps me into his arms and carries me into the bedroom. He lays me on the bed and takes off my shoes and pants; I wasn’t wearing any underwear. Then he takes his clothes off. I take my shirt off and throw it to the floor as he crawls between my legs. When he reaches my mouth, I open up and take his tongue, and we kiss as he lays me back onto the bed. I wrap my legs around his waist, and he starts rocking us together letting our cock’s rub against each other and our stomachs. With my arms around his neck I pull him closer to deepen the kiss as he pinches and pulls on my nipple and ring. I moan into the kiss, and I feel him pull away. He reaches over to the side table and grabs the lube... “I can’t wait!” he says flipping the top open, and I know what’s next. He’s the only person I never have a problem with topping me. He’s so good at it, and he always knows just what to do. He slicks his fingers and starts to open me up sliding one finger inside of me. “Mmm,” I moan. “You’re always so tight,” he whispers and leans down to kiss me again, as he slides another finger in, scissoring them. Even though I love to top, I still have those urges for a nice hard cock up my ass, it just never seems to itch unless I’m with the right person. But right now, I’m feeling that urge grow...fast. Feeling the third finger enter me, I start to writhe on the bed. “Jesus.” I groan as he taps my prostate. “Now, Jonathan.” I can’t take any more either. I feel him place my legs onto his shoulders, and the head of his cock is at my hole. As he starts to push into me, I reach up and pull him down to kiss me. We both moan into the kiss, and he doesn’t stop until he’s all the way in. When he’s in, he stops, knowing I need time to adjust. When I’m ready, I squeeze my thighs and ass letting him know. He pulls back from the kiss and starts to move, but when I close my eyes to lose myself in his movements, I see Brian’s face, and I whip them back open. Jonathan’s got his eyes close, his mouth hanging open, and I can see how much he’s enjoying this. I grab Jonathan’s face and pull him down into a kiss again. I feel him switch his position and hit my prostate full on, “Ohhh...” I moan as I twist away from his mouth. He just keeps on hitting it over and over. I can feel myself getting close to my own orgasm, but I hold off knowing what else I want. He starts to pick up his pace, and I know he’ll cum soon. Right then I feel him pull out of me, and I watch as he sits up and takes off his condom. I put my hand over his dick and jack him off, and I slide my finger over his piss hole and watch as he starts to cum. I feel Jonathan’s grip on my thighs tighten, and I know he’ll leave marks. As he starts to calm down a little and twitch under my continuing touch, I decide it’s my turn. I slide from underneath him and get behind him. I kiss his neck and feel him lean back against me with a sigh. I reach over for the lube, putting some on the tips of my fingers, then rolling it around to get it all over my fingers and to warm it up. I suck on his ear and down his neck nipping at it as I stick my first finger into him. “JT...” he says and turns his head so I have better access to his neck and shoulder, which I take to my advantage and kiss, lick, nip, and suck as I continue to put in the last two fingers. When he relaxes around me, I pull my fingers from him and lightly push him down onto his hands so he’s on all fours. I love taking him this way. I grab a condom from the side table, rip it open, and slide it on my dick. I put my cock to his hole and hold it there to guide it in as I lean my body over him. I’m all the way inside him when I reach the back of his neck with my mouth. I kiss him there, and he turns his head to look at me while I kiss him sliding my tongue into his mouth. I start to move, and he pulls away moaning my name. “JT... oh god, fuck me hard...please!” he practically begs, slamming back into me as I start to ram into him swiveling my hips to hit that spot for him. “So tight. God.” I breathe out. Jesus, I’m not going to last much longer. I reach over and feel his cock as hard as mine and start to work my hand hard and fast over his cock to match the strokes of my dick. I start to feel the tingling in my spine, and I struggle to hold off. Finally he says, “I’m cumming! Please, harder!” I let go of his cock and grab onto his hips and slam into him deeper and harder, as I pull him onto me, letting my orgasm overtake me. “Yes!” I yell out. “Mmm.” I bury myself into him, feeling every wave wash over me. When I start to feel myself calm down, I pull out, take the condom off, throwing it to the ground, not even caring where it actually lands right at this point. Jonathan is laid out on his stomach across the bed, and I pretty much just throw myself next to him. I close my eyes, and the first thing I see is Brian’s face. But this time I don’t freak over it, I just look at him. I can see him leaning in to kiss me, and I can practically taste him on my tongue. He tastes so good: Beam, cigarettes, and him. It was so hard to pull away from him when all I wanted to do was have him take me home and fuck me ‘till I couldn’t walk anymore. Shit, I felt weak in the knees from just a kiss, for gods’ sakes. I can’t even imagine how it would feel to have him kiss me all over my body, sucking my cock, fucking me... “JT,” I hear Jonathan say, and I jump a little. I was completely lost in my thoughts, I can’t do this shit. I probably lost my job over everything, and he would never stay with me after we fucked. Damn, I know this. Jonathan turns to look at me. I see questions in his eyes. “We’re perfect together. Perfect. We’re best friends. We love each other. We can do this; I can make you happy.” He looks so completely sure of himself, and I know he’ll always be there for me, and maybe if I’m looking at him as my boyfriend, I’ll fall in love with him. I know I have the perfect chance at happiness right here in front of me, and even though I’m seeing Brian’s face in the background, I know that he could never stick around. Hell, he wouldn’t even give it a try. I’m sure that after being with Jonathan in this way, Brian will mean nothing to me in no time. It’ll probably scare the shit out of him as well, and he’ll stay away from me. But never fucking anybody else? We never did that, not even when he was living here before. Could I do that? I know if I made that kind of commitment to Jonathan, I would never go back on it. He means too much to me to do something like that. “Are you sure you want to do this?” I ask him quietly, because I don’t want to say yes to something this big if he’s not. “Yes. God, yes!” he says turning onto his side and putting his hand against my cheek. “I’m in love with you, JT. There isn’t anything in this world that I’m more certain of.” I can see the truth in his eyes, and I feel myself wanting to give him this. He’s my best friend, one of the best fucks I have ever had. I do love him. I’m sure we could be happy together. I close my eyes and see Brian, and his gorgeous hazel eyes. But I can never give into him, he would just break my heart. So I just nod my head. I take a deep breath, then open my eyes as I reply. “Let’s give it a try.”