Chapter 19 The countryside was beautiful as one vineyard gave way to another, the two men laughing and enjoying a rare day outside of the city. They’d picnicked in the middle of the afternoon and now were making their way to the famous Reims Cathedral. Justin had seen so many postcards and read a bit about it on the internet. His fingers itched at the thought of spending an afternoon trying to capture the gothic architecture waiting there. He hadn’t drawn in a while. It would feel good to get caught up in creating once more. “I’ve been here before.” Andy offered. Justin glanced over studying the older man driving. He realized then that he knew so little about Andrew. He was bright, clever, handsome and in many ways vulnerable. He loved easily and Justin realized it was that characteristic that had drawn him to the man. Andy glanced over giving him a playful wink. “What is your expression?” Andy asked. “A penny for my thought.” He teased. “Yeah.” Justin admitted feeling his cheeks heat under the confidence of the other man. “Just wondering what you were thinking.” He confessed. “I was thinking of how fortunate I am now to share this with you.” Andy’s voice was soft and gentle. “You’ve come to mean so much to me.” He glanced over once more the sincerity in his eyes throwing Justin off guard. “We hardly know each other.” Justin mumbled awkwardly feeling a tightening in his chest as his heart struggled between the regrets of his past and hope for the future. Andy remained quiet, unsure of how to explain his feelings. He knew there was someone else, a past lover, he’d heard the name whispered against his neck. He’d wanted to ask but somehow knew it wasn’t his place. If Justin wanted to explain then he would in time and Andy knew he would merely have to wait and be patient. It wasn’t so much to ask really. After all he’d never felt so affected by another human being as he was by this man. From the moment he’d spotted the young American in a gallery to their many afternoons at the side walk cafés and finally now in his bed, Andy felt totally captivated by Justin. So strong, so beautiful but far more than just a pretty face, a mind to match, and yet he was suffering. Perhaps it was that guarded vulnerability that had drawn him to the blond. It was obvious that someone had hurt him badly. Andy couldn’t imagine what fool would ever do such a ridiculous thing. “Is that it?” Justin asked pointing to the spire appearing over the tree line. “That’s it.” Andy confirmed as he took the first turn and wove his way into the city. Justin rummaged through his bag pulling out first one sketch book then quickly returning it and selecting the other pad instead. “Do you need supplies?” Andy asked knowing a good shop to stop at. “Actually I do. I need some charcoal.” Justin admitted. Two quick turns and Andy brought the car to a halt. “It’s down a few doors.” Andy indicated the direction. Justin got out and headed down the side street and into a small shop. Andy watched him go waving with a smile as Justin glanced back before entering the store. Andy leaned back and gazed up and down the area. It wasn’t a very large town and yet he was amazed by the number of people and traffic. Glancing down at Justin’s empty seat, Andy’s eye caught sight of Justin’s pack. He reached down opening the loose fabric and pulled out the sketch pad Justin had discarded earlier. He’d seen it many times. Justin seemed to carry it with him where ever they went and yet he’d never once used it nor offered to share any of its contents with the other man. Glancing up to check on the blond’s progress, Andy pushed aside his feelings of intrusion as he flipped open the pad and found himself eye to eye with another man. He was strikingly beautiful, large expressive eyes, full and no doubt experienced lips, the man seemed to possess a sexual air that lay bare a natural seductive prowess. Andy felt a wave of unease as he realized that this had to be the face of Brian. The mysterious man from Justin’s past who had already slipped into their bed on more than one occasion. “What are you doing?” Justin defensive tone caused Andy to start as he released the pad. It slipped from his hand landing on Justin’s seat. Andy laughed embarrassed by his actions and also incriminating reaction. “Just looking at your work.” He replied innocently. He reached once more for the sketch pad and opened it. “You’re so talented. Why haven’t you ever shown me any of these?” Andy asked feeling as though he knew the answer to that question, but needed Justin to admit it. . “I don’t know.” Justin lied. He reached for the sketches then once he had them in hand returned them to his bag. “Let’s go.” He dismissed the situation wanting to avoid any further questions. “Who is he?” Andy asked as he started the car once more. “Just someone from home.” Justin tried to deflect Andy’s suspicions. “He’s very handsome.” Andy pressed. “Yes, he is.” Justin’s reply was matter of fact. “Was he someone special to you?” Andy offered. “Perhaps a lover?” “I don’t really want to talk about him.” Justin’s response told Andy everything he needed to know. Glancing over, Justin’s emotions regarding this mysterious figure were etched plainly upon the blond’s face. They lingered there but for a moment though before disappearing, replaced instead by an unreadable hard mask. A mask that Andy had never seen before but one that over time as he tried to extract more information concerning Brian Kinney he would come to know very well. Andy continued on to the Cathedral silence dominating the two men. It was then that Andy began to realize for the first time that he was sharing the blond with another man. A man who was living an ocean away but still possessed the power to come between them. ******** “That’s Reims Cathedral.” Christophe, head of marketing for Villibord, explained to the group as they stared down into the village below the vineyard. The Kinnetik team stood looking out from the patio murmuring quietly as they marveled at the mere size of the structure. “It’s an amazing site. I suggest that you all take some time to visit it. It’s a popular tourist attraction.” Brian glanced over to gauge the blond’s interest in scheduling some time to take a look and was shocked to find Justin’s complexion pale and his eyes hollow. Brian reached for him but was surprised when the smaller man stiffened and moved away. “I’m okay.” He warned focusing on his glass of champagne in order to avoid seeing the pain in Brian’s eyes. Justin wanted to explain but knew that he couldn’t, not now anyway, not while he was struggling just to breathe. The client, Monsieur Villibord and his wife Laurence picked up on the younger man’s reaction exchanging a concerned look. They had already ascertained from the blond’s language skills that he had been in Paris for some time. Even though he had a slight American accent his French was far better than most. Laurence found herself wondering how long these two Americans had been united. She felt touched by the way the older of the two reached out to the blond. She wasn’t normally so interested in the affairs of others, but something told her that she was witnessing a beautiful tragedy before her eyes. Wanting to help in some way, Laurence Villibord took the opportunity to change the subject as she graciously began discussing where her guests accommodations. Brian stayed close to Justin and was grateful that he had when Madame Villibord casually announced that he and Justin would be staying in the garden cottage. Cynthia stepped up trying to intercede feeling responsible for the misunderstanding concerning the two men’s relationship. Before she could explain though, she felt a hand on her arm as Brian accepted the cottage ignoring the looks of his creative team. “I’m sure the time change has a few of you feeling a bit worn.” Diane Chambefort, media specialist, offered. “Dinner will be served out here on the patio. We will meet back here at nine tonight.” She announced. “In the meantime, “Monsieur Villibord began, his thick French accent lending charm to each word. “Laurence, Franck and I invite you to settle into your rooms and then explore the grounds. If you need anything the rest of the Villibord team will be available to assist you as well.” He reached to his side placing his shoulder upon a handsome dark haired man’s shoulder. “Franck, my son, is the future of Villibord, it is under his advisement that we are considering an expansion into America.” Brian met the younger Villibord’s gaze and recognized a familiar leer there. It was unfortunate. Had they met under any other circumstances they would have no doubt been fucking in under an hour. After one final toast, group slowly dispersed as two servants stepped forward to help the Americans staying in the main house to locate their rooms. Franck Villibord moved toward Brian and Justin. “I am so looking forward to working with you.” Franck admitted his smile friendly, his demeanor relaxed. “Let me show you both to the garden cottage. When Diane learned of your relationship from the Concierge my parents wanted to insure that you had the privacy and seclusion that couples at times require.” Brian glanced at Justin who seemed to be coping once more. “That was very gracious of your parents.” Justin offered softly. “But we aren’t a couple.” He added. Franck considered the blond’s words unsure of how to proceed. “That isn’t entirely true.” Brian corrected surprising the younger man. Justin was more than proficient in spotting a “let’s fuck” aimed in Brian’s direction. He’d merely been trying to clear up any hesitancy on the French man’s part, if there had been any. “There is but one bedroom in the cottage.” Franck offered wondering if he needed to make a change. “It will be fine.” Brian ended the conversation making it clear to both men that he didn’t want to discuss it further. “So you are an interpreter?” Franck asked engaging the younger man once more still curious about what connection there was between the two men, if any. He’d watched them closely since their arrival. He had felt encouraged when his parents had readily offered the cottage to the two men. He’d only recently come out to his parents and felt certain that they were trying to assure him of their acceptance by their gracious accommodation of this American couple. Franck had been surprised by the age difference in the men and also the variance of demeanor. The older seemed a true sexual predator. A man who had taken many and thrived on the hunt, it was that aura that now preoccupied the younger Villibord, his imagination racing in wild directions. “He’s an artist.” Brian offered before Justin could respond. Franck registered the pride and affection in the older man’s voice and checked his libido slightly. “Then you must go down into Champagne.” Franck suggested brightly. “The Cathedral“ “I’ve been there.” Justin replied softly filling in the blanks for Brian as he did so. The men continued up the path until they reached a lovely cottage. It was a two story home but with only five rooms in all. An open living area with kitchen and bath downstairs the oversized bedroom and bath was located on the second floor. A beautiful rock fireplace anchored the living area. It was both rustic and romantic, exactly what Brian had feared and hoped for. “Well, until tonight.” Franck offered as he turned to go. “Monsieur.” Brian began realizing that Justin was already moving to the fireplace where someone had recently started a fire. He reached out shaking the man’s hand. “Merci beaucoup”. Brian couldn’t help but notice the way Franck’s hand lingered in his own. “My pleasure.” Franck smiled liking this man more and more as the day progressed. He sensed that something was not quite right between this young couple, if that was what they even were. It wasn’t his place to pry so he had no intentions of breaching their privacy just hoped that whatever seemed to be affecting the blond would pass quickly. Despite his own desire to taste the handsome brunet, he wished the blond no ill. Franck cleared his throat as he quickly considered a way to steal a bit more time with Kinney. “I will be having a drink with my father in an hour if you wish to join us.” Brian glanced quickly in the direction of the blond before leaving the invitation open. “If though you are in need of some rest we would of course completely understand.” Brian nodded noticing once more the leer as Franck Villibord’s steel blue eyes embraced his body once more. Franck smiled as he turned to go. Brian sighed once the door was shut. He was gay or at least Brian hoped as much. He’d need to confirm it with the resident expert who was now staring into the small fire that was managing to warm the chilly room. “He’s nice.” Brian offered as he moved into the living area. “He’s gay.” Justin confirmed Brian’s suspicions. “I’m getting better at this.” Brian observed. Justin glanced back, his smile warming the older man more than any fire could ever manage. “You’re a quick study.” Justin teased. “He’s interested too. Surely you didn’t miss all the signals. Some messages transcend language.” “Yeah.” Brian sounded disinterested which surprised the younger man. “I guess I’m your best student.” They exchanged a familiar look momentarily acknowledging all the lessons that had been learned. “You were after all always my favorite pupil.” “So many lessons.” Justin admitted not wishing to lose the tender connection of the moment. Brian wanted to bask in the brief emotional reprieve as well but knew he didn’t really have the luxury of time to do so. “Want to tell me what happened out there?” Brian asked. Justin turned back to the fire shaking his head. “Just more memories.” He offered hugging his arms around him to hold in the warmth. Brian moved up behind him adding his arms to those embracing the smaller man. “We can leave.” He offered. “That would be rather rude and hard to explain.” Justin ventured. “Fuck ‘em.” Brian shot back in all seriousness. Justin leaned back closing his eyes, his head resting on Brian’s chest. “I know you mean that and it makes all the difference in the world.” He admitted. Brian leaned down kissing the side of Justin’s neck. Justin rolled his head further to the side giving the older man greater access. Brian felt encouraged by the action trailing his hands down Justin’s stomach as he moved lower on Justin’s neck. “I want you.” Brian whispered huskily. “Want to get el natural in the el natural?” He teased. “We can go for a walk in the garden and let nature take its course.” Justin suddenly stepped out of his arms the mood shattered by some unseen force. “What?” Brian reeled at the loss of contact. “I’m tired.” Justin announced moving to his bag and heading up the narrow stair case. Brian watched him go feeling confused and frustrated both with himself and the situation. How was he ever going to find a way to get close to Justin if the blond continued to fight him at every pass? He stared into the fire comparing the blue lights to the eyes that had just left him. ******** “What if someone comes along?” Justin glanced nervously around but found his inquiry answered by two lips meeting his as he was lowered onto the blanket. “This is France. We expect people to have sex now and then.” Andy teased his fingers quickly unbuttoning Justin shirt then moving under the cloth to touch the smooth porcelain skin below. He continued to deepen the kiss as their tongues fought for domination. This was where he found the contrast of the blond so exciting. The angelic man beneath him always transforming into the sexual aggressor in bed. It had surprised Andy at first. He’d expect Justin to be shy and passive during sex but instead had found himself fucked within an inch of his life after their first encounter. “Justin.” Andy moaned as the blond began deftly removing the sandy blond’s clothing. It was a well honed skill and Andy found his mind wondering back to the image he’d seen earlier staring back at him from the sketch pad. Had this been the man to instill these skills in Justin? Had the mysterious Brian been the teacher and Justin his best student? “I’ve never had sex outside.” Justin laughed as he helped Andy wiggle free of his pants. “Well at least not in the outdoors. Alleys but that’s different.” He explained. The breeze was cool over their skin, the air filled with the scents of spring, the sun warm on their bodies, the grass a natural cushion beneath their old blanket. “We’ll let nature take its course-“ Andy’s words were cut off as Brian dropped his bag to the floor of the cottage startling Justin from his memory. “Justin-“ He offered desperately needing some sign that they were making progress. “Don’t.” Justin warned still feeling the haunting memory of Andy’s fingers gliding over his skin. He felt the lump in his throat but refused to give in to it. “I’m trying here.” Brian announced. “I know.” Justin’s voice was a whisper. “I need -“ “I know!” Justin snapped feeling trapped and helpless. “Go find Franck. He seemed interested.” “Fuck you!” Brian spat. “Is that what you think? You think this is all some elaborate scheme to get you into bed?” Justin didn’t respond. He knew it was ridiculous now that Brian had actually stated his suspicions aloud. “This isn’t about getting my dick sucked Justin.” He continued. “This is about trying to figure out how to get you back in my life.” “Why?” Justin reeled on the man. “What’s changed?” Brian hadn’t expected any response. “I’ve changed.” Brian replied honestly. “Bullshit.” Justin spat. “You’re the same old Brian.” The older man stalked across the room seizing Justin by the arms and forcing him to face him. “No Justin, I’ve changed but so have you.” He sneered. “What the fuck happened to that brave little shit who wouldn’t accept no for an answer?” Justin struggled to pull free but Brian refused to let go. “What happened to that man who told me to get my ass back in bed when I was sick? Who called me a motherfucker for pushing him away? Who had the balls to create a one of a kind ring and actually propose to a hard hearted son-of-a-bitch like me?” Brian demanded. “Where did he go Justin? Where the fuck did he go?” “He died!” Justin shouted jerking his arm loose and staggering back. Brian held his breath in the face of Justin’s pain. “He died a thousand deaths over the years when he was with you and the years he spent trying to get over you.” Brian watched the blond carefully. He knew that the man’s words were partially true but that there was more. “You’re lying.” Brian challenged. “Think what you want.” Justin moved back to the staircase but was intercepted. “You aren’t the one lying cold in a grave.” Brian challenged. Justin turned slowly narrowing his eyes. “What did you say?” He asked his face a mixture of pain and cold rage. “I said that you aren’t the one lying cold in the grave. You didn’t die. Andy did.” Brian knew that he was taking a risk but felt that it was the only way to finally break though the barriers that the blond had erected. “You’re right.” Justin admitted his body tense as he pinned the older man with two cold blue eyes. “I’m not the one lying cold in the grave.” He grabbed his jacket then turned as he reached the top of the staircase. “I’m the asshole who put Andy there.” Brian could only watch as the blond disappeared down the stairs and the door to the cottage slammed shut behind him. ******** Brian ventured into the parlor of the main house and was immediately welcomed by the father and son. He couldn’t help but admire Franck, now changed into a close fitted expensive silk jersey. “Justin will not be joining us?” Franck asked hoping that he had made it clear that the invitation included both men. He was relived that his excitement didn’t bleed into his tone. ”No, I’m afraid he….”Brian stumbled slightly. “He’s not feeling well.” He offered. The two men were too polite to inquire further accepting the explanation as it was intended they poured Brian an aperitif. The wine was light in color and tasted both subtle and slightly sweet to Brian’s taste. “This is our latest product.” Franck explained. “My mother suggested it.” “Laurence is a lover of all things subtle and sweet.” Phillipe Villibord offered. “Was that the mention of my name?” Laurence arrived. Brian rose and graciously accepted her extended hand, the connection was brief as she accepted her glass as well. “Where is your partner?” She asked her accent making her words far thicker than those of her son’s. “That is the right word I am hoping.” “Yes.” Brian rolled his lips into this mouth. “Though we aren’t really---“ He paused glancing at Franck then back to the woman. “We were.” He finally stated his eyes locking onto Franck seeing the understanding there. “He’s not well.” Phillipe informed his wife. She nodded smiling graciously as she slowly sipped the rose wine. She couldn’t help but notice how troubled the handsome brunet appeared. It had to have something to do with the way his lover had reacted on the patio. She gestured for the men to return to their seats as she found her’s next to her husband. “Is your..” She stumbled slightly catching herself. “partner in need of a doctor?” Her English was broken but understandable. “No.” Brian replied quickly. “He will be fine.” Brian spoke. “He did not like the Cathedral?” Laurence pressed. “He’s been here before.” Brian offered unsure of how to explain. “His French is very good. Were you here with him?” She continued finding her confusion deepening with each question. “No.” Brian’s tone revealed his discomfort with the questioning. Franck jumped in hoping to change the subject. “We are very anxious to hear what you have to tell us.” Franck launched. “Your initial ideas were of great interest. The boards that were sent to us were works of art.” “Yes, well that’s Justin.” Brian beamed his pride in the younger man evident. “He is an artist.” “That is where I have seen him.” Laurence Villibord announced then launched into a long series of French phrases to her husband and son. Brian tried to follow wishing Justin were there to interpret among other things. “My mother has seen your partner at one of the galleries in Paris. It was some time back. He worked there?” Franck asked. ”It’s possible. I’m not really sure what Justin did while he was living in Paris. We weren’t together then.” Brian couldn’t believe that it was coming back around to their relationship. This was a real deviation from what Justin had explained concerning the French’s respect for privacy. “You met when he returned?” Phillipe asked picking up where his wife left off. “No,” Brian cleared his throat. “We were together before he left then once he returned we resumed our relationship.” Brian downed his glass wishing he’d stayed at the cottage. “Dinner will be soon.” Laurence smiled warmly. “I hope your Justin will feel like joining us then.” She smiled. “In the meantime, Franck take Mr. Kinney down to the vineyard and show him where your grandfather first started this life.” Brian glanced at Franck who reached for the American’s glass. Their hands brushed, Brian couldn’t help but react. Franck Villibord was after all his type. Tall, lean, dark, handsome, intelligent, and seemed ready to be taught a thing or two. The two men excused themselves from the Villibords and began moving down the back steps toward the oldest vines on the estate. ****************** The two men sat across from one another each sullenly playing with their food. The waiter had already filled their wine glasses twice. Andy glanced up taking in the mirrored appearance of his lover. “Just tell me who he is.” He ordered. Justin glanced up meeting the other man’s gaze. “No.” Justin argued. “I told you he’s no longer a part of my life. I don’t want to discuss it.” “If he’s no longer a part of your life then why the fuck did you whisper his name and not mine when you came no more than an hour ago.” Justin looked away unable to meeting Andy’s gaze any longer. “I said I was sorry. It isn’t like you haven’t thought of others-“ He argued. “Really? Well what if I told you that I have never thought of another man while sharing my bed with you?” Andy hissed. Justin was shocked by the admission. “Never?” He asked one eyebrow lifted in disbelief. “Never.” Andy insisted. “Now tell me who the fuck you were thinking of.” Andy spat his anger deepening in the face of Justin’s surprise. “He was the man that I was with before I came here.” Justin admitted softly as he returned to playing with his food. Andy found his actions distracting but decided against asking him to stop. It was obvious that whomever this man was that he still meant something to the blond. Andy had every intention getting the truth now before he found himself more entangled with this American. “His name is Brian, Brian Kinney.” Justin glanced up. “We were partners. It ended. End of story.” “Hardly the end moi cheri.” Andy’s tone was kind as he read the hurt evidenced by his lover’s guarded behavior. “I suspect he hurt you.” “He didn’t mean to.” Justin quickly defended causing Andy’s brows to rise. “But you’re over him.” He offered disbelieving. “We wanted different things.” Justin ignored the question. “Such as…” Andy led wanting to get to the bottom of this once and for all. “I wanted monogamy he wanted three and four ways.” There was a lingering bitterness and disappointment that concerned the older man. “Justin-“ “I’m over him!” He shouted suddenly coming to the end of his rope and pulling up hard. Andy glanced around apologetically then turned back to Justin. “Obviously.” He quipped. “Let’s go home.” Justin suggested. “Why? So we can make love again and you can try to convince me that it’s me you’re with and not Brian Kinney? No thanks.” Andy gestured for the waiter. “Andy-“ Justin reached across the table. He felt desperate to keep the man in his life. He did have feelings for Andy. Justin knew he wasn’t over Brian but he was trying. He just needed more time. “Look Justin.” Andy sighed throwing his napkin in his plate. “I think we should stop seeing one another. It’s obvious that you’re still in love with this other man and well…I’m falling in love with you. This has disaster written all over it.” Andy surmised. “Better to get out now than to get hurt later.” “I won’t hurt you.” Justin promised taking the man’s hand and holding on. Andy glanced up meeting the brilliant blue eyes, so innocent, so sincere. He had no doubt that Justin meant every word that he said. Andy realized then he was going to get hurt but something in those eyes made him realize that being with Justin was worth the risk.. After all he’d recovered from heartaches before, how much worse could this one be? That night they’d made love and Justin had forced himself to keep his eyes open and his thoughts on Andy alone. It had been later after the older man had fallen asleep that Justin had left their bed and spent the rest of the night staring into the eyes of the only man he now realized he would ever really love. *************** “These are the oldest vines. These are the original.” Franck offered. Brian looked closely but found he couldn’t really see any difference. Grapes to him were grapes. Franck smiled then the two men laughed together. “Nice vines.” Brian offered and they laughed harder. “I know it all looks the same. I think for me it is the sense of history.” Franck tried to explain. “My grandfather started with a few plants and a dream.” He stared out over the hillside of vines. “Now look at the place. It’s amazing what can be accomplished if someone has vision.” “So is the wine different?” Brian asked. “Yes. Villibord is a very old vineyard with very old wines. The older the vines, the deeper the roots, the richer the wine, they don’t produce as much but what they do has so much more depth and boldness.” Franck offered. “Does that make sense?” “It does.” Brian admitted walking around the next line trying to distance himself slightly from the other man. “New vines once they start producing, produce a lot but it’s quick, shallow in a sense, narrow in taste and experience.” Franck continued following the man. His eyes never left Brian’s. Brian could feel the heat building between them as they wandered through the lines of vines. He was very aware of how long it had been since he’d had sex. It was no doubt a record of abstinence. Turning he broke the connection they had been sharing. He moved further down the line his mind going places that his heart would not tread. He felt Franck behind him and turned to find the man standing very near. His cologne was heady, his body perfect under the silk jersey, his tongue wetting his full lips. Brian knew what was about to happen and felt powerless to stop it. Franck reached out and touched Brian’s face then drew his lips down to taste the American. The heat between them exploded into a frenzy of movement as they sought to devour one another. Villibord reached down his hands deftly working on Brian’s pants. It was then that Brian’s heart regained the upper hand. “No.” The American murmured softly then as Franck’s hand reached its destination. Brian moved away out of his touch. “No.” He stated more firmly. “But you said…” Franck argued confused by Brian’s resistance. “Is it Justin?” He furrowed his brow. “We aren’t together, but it’s not because I don’t want to be.” He explained. “Then why..” Franck reached for him again causing Brian to take another step back. Franck held his ground moving no closer nor retreating. “I’m not into young grapes.” Brian replied cryptically. Brian noted the immediate understanding in the other man’s gaze. “There was a time when fucks were my life. I lived for them. But now, I’ve had more, I’ve tasted the old grapes and I don’t want young vines, I want something with deeper roots.” Brian offered. “I think you just came up with Villibord’s new slogan.” Franck offered. Brian considered his words and smirked. He nodded. “I’m an eloquent son-a-bitch when I’m being an asshole.” He teased. Franck nodded liking the man too much to allow his disappointment to damage their budding friendship. “So Justin, “Franck paused considering his words before continuing. “He looks like young grapes.” He gestured toward the house as they started back in that direction. “Nope, never really was.” Brian offered the wonder of this discovery evident in his voice. “He was instantly old with me, it was always more, but I didn’t realize the difference in the quality.” Franck nodded understanding. “Well if you ever need something to cleanse your pallet.” Franck offered. “I’ll keep that in mind.” Brian smiled both men knowing it was never going to happen. There was a moment of lingering longing between them before Brian finally cleared his throat breaking the sexual tension that remained. “Well I should get back to Justin.” Brian offered. “I will see you at dinner.” Franck replied. Brian gave a quick nod then began heading up the trail leading to the garden cottage. He knew Justin was the man he wanted but the more distance he put between his body and Franck Villibord’s the better. When he returned to the cottage Brian was relieved to find Justin sitting in front of the fire. He paused in the doorway. “Enjoy your walk?” Brian asked. “I didn’t go far.” Justin defended. “Ready to talk?” Brian offered moving toward the fire. “I think we’ve talk enough for one day.” Justin glanced up from the pages he’d been looking at. It was then that Brian realized they were the sketches. The ones he’d found the day before in Paris. “What do you have?” He asked moving up to the small coffee table where the blond was sitting near the hearth. He feigned surprise. “Exhibit A.” Justin offered cryptically showing the well worn pages briefly before settling back once more to gaze at them. “Looks like someone didn’t like them very much.” Brian offered hoping to open their previous conversation. He realized it was painful but also that it was his only hope of breaking through the walls Justin had erected. “Andy.” Justin admitted surprising the brunet. “Andy did that?” Brian asked in confusion. Justin nodded. The blond rose leaving the sketches lying on the table. He moved to the stairs. “Brian, “ He paused at the bottom on the stair case. Brian glanced back. “I’m sorry about earlier. I’m just-“ “Sorry’s bullshit Justin. You either want to get past this or you want to be the grieving widower for the rest of your life. Do what you want, but don’t apologize for that decision.” His gaze was hardened by weeks of patience and effort. Justin rolled his lips into his mouth not wanting to rekindle their earlier outburst. With quiet resignation he moved up the stairs leaving Brian alone with the sketches.