--------------------------------------------------------------------------- A few thanks, Carolyn, thanks for a great beta job, glad to have you back. Sid,Aida, Rach for being my other eyes. Rach, for so much more..love you. The Delph gang, love you all. Timmy, COOOOL. Love you all. And CONGRATS MATT. This is also for Shauna, who had her precious little baby boy on Friday, Feb 24,2006, who had his share of problems, but is doing much better. Love you girl and call me for anything. I'll come on over. Also, Aida and Mo for always pestering me for more..I'm working on 18 now. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- WPS 17 Ben I called Michael yesterday to let him know I would be over today. Heath and I lost track of time. Okay we didn’t care about time. I pull up to Michael’s, getting out of the car I take a deep breath, knocking on his door, making sure you can’t tell I have a recording device on me. Opening the door he smiles, “Ben, I’m so glad you’re here. Brian’s going to come over later as well.” “Ya he told me he would be around.” I hand him the lunch I brought over. “Thanks, I need this. Been feeling kinda weak today.” He puts his hand on his stomach, making me feel a little sick to my stomach. He sure has this routine down. A few minutes later there’s a knock on the door, Michael opens it, “Brian,” hugging him. “I knew you would come over.” Walking in he sees me and smiles, knowing that I’m already recording this one and he doesn’t have to do it. “Hey Professor. Nice to see you again.” I give him a hug whispering as I do it. “I have this one, you just relax.” I can feel him relax a little in my arms. “Thanks.” Turning around we see Michael smiling. “It’s so good to see the two of you getting along so well.” Smiling we nod. “Well Ben and I have always gotten along.” Smiling at me he grunts and I smile knowing what he’s talking about. Taking a seat I keep the conversation going. “So Michael, what all did the doctor say?” Looking from me to Brian before looking down he sighs. “Well the doctor said that the cancer is in Stage two. The tumor is confined to the prostate and can be detected by DRE or ultrasound, which I had and they’re going to start me on different medicines. Plus chemotherapy. Still treatable.” “I thought you said he said it was fatal.” Brian asks. “Well at first they thought it was farther but it turns out it was an infection which made it look worse. I had another test and it came back and they said it can be helped with treatment.” Smiling wiping a tear I look at Brian who nods. I look at Michael who walks over to Brian and hugs him. “I’m going to make it Brian. I have to, for everyone.” Looking at Brian’s eyes I see them tear. Michael wipes them away. “We will be fine.” Brian looks to me and nods. “He’s going to be fine.” I walk over and hug them both, making my own tears come down my face. “I’m so glad you can get the help you need and be okay.” He smiles at me before hugging me. “Thanks Ben. Means a lot.” Michael tells me. We sit and talk, mostly about Brian and Michael’s past and then I had to ask more so we could have more on this. “Michael, when do you go in for chemo?” “Umm,” He looks at me, “The doctor’s setting it up now. He’ll call me with the day.” “Let me know, I’ll go with you.” He just answers with a nod. “Well I should get going. Justin’s waiting on me. I’m already late and he hates that.” Brian smirks out. “Ya, I need to get back too. Heath’s making dinner for us and I told him I would stop at the store for the wine.” I stand up next to Brian and give Michael a hug, knowing he’s jealous, but over who, Brian or me? “Come on professor, I’ll walk out with you.” Brian hugs Michael one last time but I could see that it’s a stilted movement. “Okay well come see me later.” We both nod as we walk out. Getting to our cars I look up to see Brian standing there. “You okay?” Nodding he looks at me, “Yeah just hate doing it this way. I wanted to fucking kick his ass Ben.” “I know, but we can’t let on we know the truth. Oh Heath wants you and Justin to come over tonight, he said he has a surprise for us all.” He smiles and does his tongue in cheek expression. “Alright, we’ll be over later. Just give me time to go home and change and get my blond first.” Smiling once more getting into his car, waving as he drives off, I catch the glimpse of Michael looking out the window, waving to me as I get in my car, driving off and turning off the recorder. Brian Walking into the loft I spot Justin in his little corner, painting. Walking over I kiss him on his lips, “Hey Sunshine, what are you working on?” “Just doodling. How was it?” I look back over at him before sighing. “He’s keeping up the act well. I think he missed his calling.” Making a few drinks, handing one to Justin, “Oh Heath wants us over for dinner, something about a surprise for us.” “I don’t want another foursome.” Justin smiles at me. “Well I guess it’s a good thing we have this rule, huh.” Throwing a now clean brush at me I laugh. “So get dressed so we can head over there, I’m starving.” “You’re actually admitting you’re hungry?” I raise an eyebrow at him but we both just laugh. “Well a certain blond made me see just how important eating is.” Swatting him on his ass as he walks by, heading to the bedroom. “Well who is he? I’d like to thank him.” Justin teases me. “Look in the fucking mirror and you can thank him.” I hear him laughing in the other room and my heart leaps from my chest.How can one man make me feel weak with just a laugh? How the hell would I ever want to leave that? I wouldn’t. “So, what did Michael say? Unless you would rather not talk about it.” Justin sits on the couch putting his shoes on. “Well, he said that the doctor was wrong at first, that it was an infection that made it look worse then it is and that he’ll have to have chemo, but that with the right treatment, he should be fine.” He looks up to me because he hears my voice crack. “You wanted to punch him out didn’t you?” I nod as he walks over to me, putting his hand on my face. “The time will come when you can do that, I promise.” Sighing I put my forehead onto his. “I love you.” “I love you, too, now let’s get going before your stomach knocks me out with another rumble like that one." Laughing we leave the loft and head to Heath’s and Ben’s. Knocking on the door, waiting for them to open it I pull Justin into me, kissing him, and both of us moan. “Oh get a fucking room.” Heath laughs as I look up from kissing Justin. Walking past Heath I just smile, “Jealous much?” “Hell no.” Heath shuts the door as we move into the living room where Ben is currently sitting. “Hey guys.” Ben gets up to give us hugs. “How are you guys?” “Fine, but let’s fucking eat, I’m starving.” I grin at them. “Well, looks like Justin's good for you in a lot of ways.” Ben giggles. Making our way to the dinning area I see the table made up for the four of us with the food already set out. Sitting down and making plates we have small talk. Then Heath brings it up. “So I heard you were ready to punch Michael out today? Maybe you shouldn’t go over so much until this is resolved.” “No, I have to do this or he’ll suspect something.” I take a bite of chicken. “Well least you didn’t hit him, yet.” Smiling Heath looks at me, “I heard the story of you hitting him once before.” I look at Justin who looks at me and smiles. “Yes he did.” Justin says with a full mouth. “Well why did you hit him then?” Heath looks at Justin who shrugs. “I still don’t know why he did it. I never asked.” “Well?” Heath looks back to me when Ben chimes in as well. “Ya Brian, I always wondered that.” “He just said something that pissed me off.” I take a bite and see all of them looking at me. I take Justin’s hand. “It‘s okay Brian I want to know, too.” Justin squeezes my hand. Looking back at Ben I say quietly, “Okay, he said ‘Justin used you, and he took from you and he never gave back a thing and this is the thanks you get for saving his life. If you ask me it wasn't worth it. You might as well just left him lying there. Basically I should have let him die there on the ground.” I hear Justin cough and I look at him, patting his back. “You okay?” “He said that?” Justin asks shaking. “Yes, I didn’t tell you before. And this is why.” Hugging him to me. “I wouldn’t ever leave you, not like that, and not in any other way. Not now.” “Sorry to hear that, now I want to kick his ass.” Heath takes a drink. “Me, too. Sorry he said that.” Ben looks to us both and Justin gets up and walks out of the room. “Fuck.” I look at the door Justin just left through. Justin I lean against the banner trying to catch my breath. Fuck I haven’t had a panic attack in so long. I can’t believe I actually wanted to hear that. How could any person say that about another? I take a deep breath and feel two strong arms around my waist, pulling me into his body and holding me close while he whispers, “This is why I didn’t want to tell you. I didn’t want to upset you with the past.” “How do you remember what he said?” I lean my head against his shoulder and he tightens his hold. “I could never forget something like that. Especially when it’s about someone I care for and love very much.” he kisses the side of my head. “Oh.” I sigh quietly and take another deep breath, while Brian rubs my arm with one hand and the other is rubbing my back between our bodies. He always knew how to help calm me down when I felt a panic attack coming on. “Justin, listen to me. Are you listening?” I nod my head as he continues. “Good, I don’t care who they are, if anyone, including God himself said something like that, I would fucking deck them so hard, like I did. Yes I know ‘God’ wouldn’t, but you catch my drift. I love you Justin Taylor, always and forever.” Nodding my head I let out a small sigh and breathe. “Sorry I left like that.” “It’s okay, but it’s fucking freezing out here and you don’t have a jacket, neither of us have jackets on.” He kisses my head taking my hand and leading me back into the house and into the living room where Heath and Ben were sitting, talking quietly. “You okay?” Ben asks as he gets up to hug me. “I would have decked him, too, if I knew.” “I’m okay, just, can we forget it and move on.” Looking at Heath, smiling, “So you said you had a surprise for us?” “Oh yeah, have a seat and I’ll get it.” Walking over to his desk he takes out the envelope. “I asked Melanie if I could give you this.” Brian takes it and sees the return address and smiles, handing it to me, “You do the honors Sunshine.” I grin, opening the envelope I pull out the divorce papers, finalized. “Oh my god, it’s official?” Looking up to Heath he grins. “Yes it is, so now you two can get married as soon as you want.” I turn around planting my lips onto Brian’s, kissing him feverishly. Placing his hands on my face he laughs, “Well that was the best gift. But save it for when we get home.” “Okay,” I look around, “Can we go home now?” Everyone laughs and Brian looks into my eyes, “I’m worth the wait.” “I know,” I sway my hips on his lap. “Oh fuck, ok we’re ready to go so we’ll talk later. I need to get this one home and get into him.” Standing up, I grab our jackets. “We understand, we’ll have our own celebration.” Hugging both before leaving we head home. “Hurry Brian.” He smiles at me and speeds up, getting us home and out of our clothes and into the bed in record time, fucking me, showing me that once again, he’s the man of my dreams.