Chapt 11 Justin knew exactly what he was doing until he knocked on the door to Brian’s hotel room. All of a sudden he was in a world of doubt. The moment he walked through that door, there was no turning back. A couple of weeks ago Brian Kinney was safely put away in the back of his mind and only visited on holidays and special occasions. Now it seemed like the man was everywhere and running through his mind 24-7. He just wasn’t sure if it was wise to cross that line between friends and more. Neither man was a big fan of relationships and a one-night stand would most likely disrupt the tenuous friendship they were building. But Justin still found himself knocking on Brian’s door and anticipating the night ahead. When Brian opened the door, he was bare-chested with only his jeans remaining. All thoughts of resistance were out the window and replaced by a healthy growing erection. “You took too long. I was about ready to go over to Mikey’s and drag your ass over here.” “Dressed like that?” “It was my bargaining chip if you tried to say no.” “Well that’s not what I’m gonna say.” “Then what are you going to say Sunshine?” Brian asked huskily. “I’m ready when you are,” Justin said, opening his arms wide to Brian. Brian hesitated for only a moment before claiming Justin’s full lips. He involuntarily moaned at the contact, heat coursing up and down his body. They both stumbled to the bed, undressing each other as they went. By the time Justin’s legs connected with the bed they were both completely naked and achingly hard. “God, I’ve wanted this since the moment I saw you at the cemetery,” Brian gasped. “You wanted to fuck me at Jack’s funeral?” Justin chuckled. “Yeah, but I was kinda thinking it would happen somewhere private afterwards,” Brian replied. “Well you did, I was just drunk off my ass. I hope you didn’t lose interest by having to wait.” “Nope, just makes this moment that much sweeter.” Their lips connected again while Brian’s hands began to roam over every inch of Justin’s body. Justin arched into his touch, every nerve ending on fire. Each kiss became more intense than the one before until they were both desperate with need. Justin found himself unsure as to what he wanted next. He had been led by his desire for Brian and now on the verge of getting exactly what he wanted, Justin wasn’t sure he could give up the control. There was no question Brian was a big beefy top and Justin hadn’t bottomed in quite some time. Even French kissing had been a power struggle as their tongues battled aggressively. He had never been so turned on or empty for the feel of a cock pumping into him his entire life. The feeling both exhilarated and scared the crap out of him. He pulled back to look into Brian’s lust filled eyes. “What?” Brian asked breathlessly. “Nothing, I just… I want you but I haven’t, I mean I don’t…” Justin stuttered. Brian lightly cupped Justin’s cheek with the palm of his hand. “It’s OK, just say it.” “I’m a top,” Justin quickly explained. Brian nodded his head and smiled. “Yeah, well I guess we have something in common. Come on, we’ve done this once before and you survived to tell the tale. I know the memory of it might be a little vague but it was well worth the experience. Have you bottomed for anyone else recently?” Justin shook his head, suddenly shy. Brian seemed nervous as he started to speak. It was a side of him that Justin had never seen. “I haven’t since I was in my teens but I guess it’s possible for me to consider it with you if,” Brian started but was cut off by Justin. “No, I want you inside me. It’s just that last time the alcohol numbed everything, so take it easy.” Brian reached into the pocket of his discarded jeans and grabbed the ever-present condom and lube. When he turned back to Justin, his breath caught at the sight of him laying on the bed legs spread and ready. “God, you’re beautiful,” Brian said before he could stop himself. Justin smiled from the praise and all of his doubts seemed to disappear. Brian crawled in-between his legs and handed him the condom. “Go ahead, put it on me.” Justin slid it on, enjoying the feel of Brian’s large and very hard cock on his fingertips. Brian slicked himself up and then inserted one finger at a time into Justin’s waiting hole until he was loose enough to enter. Their eyes locked on one another as Brian eased his way in, paying close attention to Justin’s facial expressions and comfort. He started to pump in slowly and increased the pace as Justin moved more forcefully against him. They continued to kiss feverishly as the passion grew. Justin fought to keep his eyes open and focused on Brian. There was a connection there that he had never experienced before. It wasn’t long before they were both panting through their orgasms. Brian was just slipping out of Justin when there was a knock at the door. He had ordered a bottle of wine earlier and figured it had finally arrived. Grabbing a nearby towel, Brian wrapped it around his waist before opening the door. The last person he expected to see was his mother. “Brian, I couldn’t sleep after you boys left. I have to know what you meant about Jus..” Joan’s voice trailed off as she looked past Brian to see Justin laying half covered on the bed. “Oh shit!” Justin squeaked, yanking the sheet around him as he sprinted for the bathroom, grabbing his clothes on the way. Brian rubbed his hand across his face tiredly and attempted to find something else to look at besides his mother. “What is going on here?” Joan demanded. “I think that’s a little obvious, don’t you?” Brian replied. Justin was on the verge of hyperventilating in the bathroom. It was all just too much to take in during the course of one day. Yesterday he had a family, although a shitty one at that, and a private life that included lots of wonderful unemotional anonymous sex. Now his whole family knew his secret, his mother had first hand knowledge of said secret, and he had made love for the first time in his life. His mind and body were shutting down in a hurry and he needed to just get away from it all. While Justin was trying to calm himself down, Brian was doing no such thing in the other room with their mother. “There’s no way this can be happening. We sent you away. Justin was a good boy with a real future ahead of him. You’ve hardly been back more than a week and already you’ve corrupted him,” Joan accused. Brian couldn’t help but laugh at his mother’s ignorance. “I didn’t make Justin gay. It’s not like you can catch it from sharing a goddamn soda. He was born that way, same as me. He was just smart enough to keep his private life as far away from you as possible.” “No, he has a girlfriend. That little black girl he’s been seeing for years.” “Daphne? Oh please, she’s been his best friend since they were babies. He has a more romantic relationship with his right hand. It’s time you accepted the fact that you raised two gay sons and that’s nothing to be ashamed of.” “How can you say that? Look at the way you’re both behaving. It’s against god,” Joan insisted. “So we had sex, big deal. It’s not like we’re really related. As far as I’m concerned we’re both orphans.” “I’m your mother. And I’m the only mother Justin’s ever had.” “Lucky him. I doubt if Mrs. Taylor knew the type of parents you both were she would have ever given you her only son. I envy Justin for those first two years of his life when he got to live with a real family and experience real love. I think that’s the reason he was able to open himself up to love, as he got older. Me? How am I to know something that I have never experienced myself? You can preach all you want about being our mother but the moment I walked away when I was eighteen I was on my own. If you ask Justin, I’m assuming you’ll get a similar response.” “He never left me, not like you,” Joan cried. “You kicked me out so let’s not change the story now. Yeah, I would have left eventually but Justin’s too good for that. He actually cares about what happens to this family. At least that makes one of us.” Before Brian could say anything else, Justin burst into the room completely dressed. He glanced from his mother to Brian and back again. He opened his mouth to say something but faltered when the right words just couldn’t come out. “Justin,” Joan and Brian said at the same time. “No, no I can’t do this now. I gotta go,” Justin said in a rush and ducked past them to escape out the door. He could hear both voices continue to call his name down the hallway but he was moving on autopilot and nothing could stop him. There was only one place he knew he could go where neither his family or Brian could find him. Flipping open his cell, Justin pushed number 3 on his speed dial and waited impatiently for someone to pick up. “Who the fuck is this?” a gruff voice asked in the receiver. “Mel, it’s me. Put Linds on the phone.” “Jesus Justin, she just got out of the hospital this afternoon and needs her rest. Why the fuck are you calling so late? Call Michael or Daphne or Emmett. I don’t care who but we’re going back to bed.” “Mel, I know she’s been through a lot but I really need someplace to go and Linds always said that…” “I know, you’re always welcome here,” Mel said finishing his sentence. She was absolutely exhausted but could sense something in Justin’s voice that was unfamiliar. He had always prided himself on being a bad ass. Tonight there was a vulnerability underneath the surface that she had never heard before. “So is it all right if I come over?” Justin asked tentatively. “Yeah, fine but use your key. I don’t want you waking up Gus.” “Thanks Mel, I’m only five minutes away.” Justin hung up, grateful that Mel had for once put aside her petty jealousy and done the right thing. Melanie gently shook Lindsey by the shoulder, whispering in her ear that it was time to wake up. A few minutes later her blue eyes popped open and focused in on her lover. “Mel, what’s going on? Is it Gus?” “No, it’s his daddy. Something’s up with Justin and I don’t know what but he didn’t sound good.” Suddenly Lindsey was completely awake. Her whole body was still sore but that didn’t stop her from crawling out of bed and putting on a robe. She slowly leaned down to kiss Melanie and whispered her thanks. There may never be a time that Melanie and Justin would be friends but at least they could put aside their differences when it was really needed. Lindsey padded down the stairs and curled up on the couch to wait for Justin. Meanwhile Brian and Joan were in a stand still. “Mother, I think it’s time you left. Obviously Justin is no longer here so you’ll just have to settle with one lecture for the evening,” Brian stated. “Fine, I’ll go. I’ve got to get up early tomorrow to go to church anyways. I’ll be praying for both of your souls.” “Save your breath,” Brian hissed and opened the door, motioning Joan out. She walked out the door and turned back around to face him one more time. “You’re both going to hell.” “Yeah, well we’ll be sure to tell Jack you say hello,” Brian said and slammed the door in her face. Leaning back against the door, Brian took a few deep breaths and reached for his cell on the nightstand. He quickly dialed a number and listened as it went directly to voicemail. “Hey, you’ve reached Justin. Leave a message and I’ll get back to you when I find the time.” Brian waited a moment after the beep and was about to hang up when he put the phone back to his ear and said softy, “Justin, it’s me. Call me when you get this. Doesn’t matter what time.” Flinging the phone onto the bed, Brian sat down heavily with a sigh. “Shit Justin, where are you?”