Chapter 3
Wedding
(reality)
Butterflies form in Justin’s stomach as he remembers his first time. Brian had been so gentle and careful even though he didn’t know how young Justin was. He glances at his clock on the nightstand. It’s past two in the morning. Unlike the nights before Justin didn’t feel sleepy at all. He gazes out the window and sees the moon hiding behind large, willow trees that are losing their leaves for the winter. Justin’s hand roams in the box. He tosses papers and stuff away as he leans his head back against the bedstead. His hair, now longer than it used to be, falls in front of his eyes and tickles his nose. He combs his silky hair back from his forehead.
(memory, in the morning)
Brian is lying sideways behind Justin, with his chest against Justin’s back on a couch. His arms are securely wrapped around his shoulders and chest. Their legs are intertwined together. A white bed sheet is tightly covering them both. As Brian slowly wakes up, he caresses Justin behind his ear with his cheek, his eyes are still closed and he inhales Justin’s hair scent. “Hey.”
“Hey yourself.” Justin whispers, his voice hoarse from sleep. He turns his body around to face Brian, twisting in the bed sheet that’s too tight. They reach out to each other’s lips and kiss, but with the lack of space on the small couch, they both fall down with a hard thud, grabbing and holding onto each other as they fall. Justin yelps as Brian lands hard on top of him. They hug each other’s naked chest. They moan as their stomachs, their bare legs and everything else gently rubs together. The bed sheet is too tight around them, making it uncomfortable to move. But in this case, not moving isn’t such a bad thing. “Hope I’m not too heavy.” Brian whispers, breathless from the sudden fall.
“No.” Justin laughs. This makes Brian laugh too. He leans up to kiss Brian; he deepens the kiss and rolls to the side with Justin in his arms. He plays with Justin’s hair as they fool around.
“Nikko’s getting married.” Justin says, his eyes closed as Brian leans down to kiss and nibble on Justin’s neck.
“Poor bastard.”
Justin breathes out a half-laugh. “I was going to say that.”
“Do you have some best man things to do?” Brian asks, nuzzling the crook of Justin’s neck.
“I don’t think so.” Justin softly answers.
“Good.” Brian reaches up and kisses Justin open-mouthed as he rolls on top of Justin.
(reality)
Justin takes a picture from the box. Written on the back of it is: Nick’s groomsmen at his wedding -1989 He turns it over.
Snapshot: Nikko’s standing in the middle with his ushers by his side. They’re standing in front of a church. Brian and Justin are close by Nikko’s side. They’re all wearing matching black tuxedos, their hair long and messy in the blowing wind. Their hands are in their pockets, chins down and eyes staring up at the camera, the smirks on their lips like Cheshire cats - a bright flash of light on their faces as lightning strikes at the same time the picture is taken.
(memory, a moment after taking that picture)
The ushers look above at the bad weather once the picture has been snapped. They all walk with the other wedding guests and the bridesmaids, towards the church. The wind is violent and they walk fast to take cover.
The ushers and bridesmaids are talking in the back of the church. They’re waiting for the bride to come out. Nikko’s in the front with the priest. The church is filled with the bride and groom’s family and friends. Brian walks up to Justin. He gently plays with Justin’s tie and rearranges his suit so it looks neater. “God, I think he’s hyperventilating.” Justin says to Brian as he looks sideways at Nikko.
“He better get used to it.” They look at Nikko who’s breathing heavily as he nervously shakes the stress from his chest like he’s about to step into a boxing match. Brian and Justin silently laugh at him. “Do you think it’s too late for him to run away?”
“Sadly, yes.” Justin says. “Poor guy.”
“He’s too young to get married. He’s only twenty-one.” Brian remarks. “I told him so. Asshole didn’t listen to me.”
“How old are you?” Justin asks Brian.
“Older than you.” Brian plays with Justin’s hair, absently arranging it nicely as well.
“You don’t even know how old I am.” Justin says and watches Brian as he raises his left brow. “I’m nineteen.”
“That’s young.”
They fool around like friends do until they get the signal to go. Justin’s first, along with Rachel’s Maid-of-Honor. Brian follows him with another bridesmaid, hooking their arms together. They line up by Nikko’s side. After the ushers and bridesmaids line up in an orderly fashion, the bride comes forth, slowly step by step. She’s very young and has long, brown hair with ash-blonde highlights hanging down her back. She’s wearing a beautiful, white dress. Her cheeks blush in a rosy red and her dark, blue eyes sparkle when she sees Nikko standing up front. Nikko exhales as he sees his fiancé. Everyone’s watching her while she’s only watching him.
Nikko and Rachel are holding hands as the priest talks with the Bible between his hands. It’s a long ceremony. Brian and Justin slyly look each other’s way while keeping their seriousness. Brian mindlessly looks across towards the bridesmaids and his eyes cross with a tall woman with blonde hair. She’s smiling sweetly at him. He smiles back politely. Nick and Rachel kiss in the end. They walk out of the church into the rain that’s now pouring down. The blonde girl catches up to Brian and nudges his arm. “Hi, my name is Lindsay Peterson.” she says, the rain getting in her eyes.
“Hi. I’m Brian Kinney.” Brian says.
“Are you with anyone?” She mumbles. “I mean, are you coming to the after-party? It’s a tradition, everyone should show up.” She asks him, hope reflecting in her eyes.
“Yeah, I’ll be there.” Brian says and he walks away, smiling politely. He doesn’t hear her exclamation of joy and she leaves by herself. He follows the rest of the groomsmen inside a rented black car. They leave as the driver quickly accelerates away from the church.
It’s still raining as Brian quickly gets out of the car. They’re back at the Victorian house. The car’s honking horns are being heard as Nikko and his wife are leaving for their honeymoon. There are a lot of people and now the bridesmaids have joined them, which makes some of the ushers very content. Everyone rushes towards the house as they come out of their respective cars or they go onto the porch. Brian looks around the place, searching for Justin. He walks to one of the groomsmen and puts a hand on his shoulder.
“Hey, do you know where Justin is?” He asks him.
“Don’t know, man. Wait, I think he’s over there.” He points to Justin who’s talking with some guy and leaning on a beam on the porch, sheltering from the rain.
“Thanks.” Brian gets closer and sees how uninterested Justin is in this guy’s conversation.
Justin’s gaze lands on Brian as he steps closer, a smirk flashes across his lips. Brian has his tie undone around his neck; the hem of his shirt hangs out from his black pants. He’s all wet and slightly panting from running to him. It makes Justin’s cock twitch just by the look of him. The other guy clearly doesn’t see Brian and keeps talking. “… ultimately Beethoven had no vision of his future, unlike Paganini who felt compassionate…”
“Justin? You coming?” Brian says in a low, seductive tone.
“Yeah. I’m sorry Ethan but I have to go. It was nice talking to you.” Justin immediately gets up and steps closer to Brian.
“Justin you haven’t heard my theory on…” The dark greasy man whines.
“Be good, Ian.” Brian interrupts him as they walk away.
“Thank you, so much. I owe you.” Justin holds onto Brian’s arm as they walk inside the house.
Everyone is dancing and drinking, tuxedos and expensive dresses in disarray. Brian and Justin are glancing in each other’s direction all the time. Drunken girls are all over Brian, groping and never leaving him alone. It pisses Brian off and he doesn’t feel flattered. He walks away finally, looking for Justin. When he finds him sitting in the stairway. Brian stands in the center, near him with his hands in his pockets.
“Don’t you owe me something?” Brian speaks softly. Justin quickly looks up, roused from his thoughts, noticing that Brian’s standing in front of him. “Come upstairs with me?”
“Sure.” Justin gets up and they head upstairs.
The windows in the room are wide open and a soft summer-night’s breeze blows inside. They fuck on the bed, passionately. Feeling each other’s skin. Touching every part of each other’s bodies. Endlessly kissing. Intertwined. Brian cries out, trembling above their panting chests. After three hours or so, while everyone has either passed out or fell asleep, silence fills the house. Justin wakens and puts his head between Brian’s legs, his hair sweeping across Brian’s thighs. He takes his cock in his mouth and caresses it with his tongue; Brian’s cock grows hard before he’s even awake. Then he wakens and says deeper. They disentangle after a while and he raises Justin until he’s looking into his face in the grey-light of the room. “Ride me, Justin.” He holds his shoulders and tangles his fingers in his hair. He penetrates him until Justin can feel nothing but Brian reaching inside him. This time he’s the one who cries out.
They stare at each other for a moment. Brian’s leaning against his car while Justin’s standing a foot in front of him in silence, with his duffle bag pulled over his shoulder. In the car, Justin can see a guitar case sitting on the backseat. He has a knot in his stomach and feels like his heart is about to break into a million pieces. “When’s your bus leaving?”
“Thirty minutes.” Justin says.
“You want a ride?” Brian asks, looking up from the spot he had been staring on the ground.
“Sure.”
It’s grey and wet from the thunderstorm the night before, making this moment even sadder. Everything looks dead around them. They drive in silence to the bus terminal. The bus is already there, waiting for its passengers to come on board.
“Just, don’t tell Nick I’m gay. I’ve never told anyone before.” Justin says in a low tone.
“I’ve never told anyone either. Don’t worry.” Brian leans away from his car to hug Justin close to him. “I won’t tell anyone. You’re safe with me.” He feels Justin hold him tighter. And he leaves. Justin doesn’t glance back as he steps inside the coach bus. He hides in the john so the world can’t see him cry.