By Doppelganger and 666meow

Brooklyn, New York. “Oh, sweetheart,” Jennifer gasped as she looked at Justin’s paintings. The first ones he showed her were images of New York City; its people, how he perceived its beauty and its darkness at the same time. 

“They’re… breathtaking,” her voice was as though hypnotized by the colors used in the paintings. One of the paintings was of an old man sitting on a bench outside a local Spanish/convenience store, painted in black and white. Justin captured the sadness and loneliness in the old man’s eyes. Jennifer felt like she was looking at her son’s face. Behind his beautiful blue eyes, lay an old, sad, lonely man. This thought made Jennifer turn her head toward her son. She was watching his every movement when her attention was caught by the covered canvases aligned in the further side of the studio, far from Justin’s New York City paintings. There were four, Jennifer counted, each one resting against the wall. There was something about the white cloth covering the canvases. It gave a haunted feeling of solitude. 

“Can I look at those, honey?” Jennifer asked as she pointed at the white-sheet covered canvases. 

Justin didn’t say a word, just nodded with his head bowed and started walking towards the first paintings his mother was inspecting a few seconds ago. He turned his head towards his mother’s figure as he walked away. He watched her move under his blue eyes. 

She remained silent as she unwrapped each canvas. The first one was of a dark-haired man, naked, lying on his stomach, arms and legs sprawled on the bed. Jennifer admired her son’s extraordinary feel of human form. Each muscle of the man’s body talked to her… even each visible strand of hair denoted the artist’s feelings when he painted the subject.

The second one was a simple portrait of the same dark-haired man. It was in gray but Justin made the subject’s hazel eyes stand out. Jennifer felt like the man was staring at her, reading her soul, wandering in her mind. At that moment she knew why her son fell helplessly in love with this man. His eyes said it all.

The third one was no different from the first two. Justin used the same subject only this time, he included another person. Most of the surface of the third canvas was literally in black but she could see the obvious figure of two faces, tips of their noses touching, acting like they were about to kiss. Although the colors in the painting were limited to 
black, blue, gray and a little white, it denoted serenity, peacefulness and contentment. 

Jennifer couldn’t bring herself to pull the white cloth off the fourth and last canvas. The pain, the sadness was visible in every brush stroke and every detail in each of the covered paintings. Every line of each image echoed loneliness, nostalgia. She didn’t know if she wanted to see the last one just because she didn’t know what she would say to her son.
She decided to do it quickly, to just take the covering off the canvas. She wasn’t mistaken but very surprised with the last painting when she saw it. It was of a mansion; Beautiful, almost magical. There was a fairy tale feel to the last painting. It made Jennifer happy. She knew right there and then, Justin was thinking of home. 

“Are you going to include this in your exhibit, Justin?” Jennifer’s voice echoed in the quietness of the studio. 

“I’m not sure yet,” Justin quietly replied as he watched his mother cover the paintings one by one. 

“Well, honey, not to be biased, but I feel that you should include these paintings. They are the best you have created so far,” Jennifer said, standing next to her son; she fixed her eyes on his blond hair that was now long and carefully parted from the left side, creating a soft curtain of locks around his soft face. 

“I’ll think about it, Mom,” Justin replied once again, a little smile on his full lips. 

“Have you spoken to him?” For a second, Jennifer could tell that Justin was going to pretend he didn’t know who she was talking about. But then he replied. 

“What for?” Justin answered his mother. The bitterness in his voice was apparent. “He stopped calling me and stopped visiting. I think I’m capable of knowing when someone doesn’t want to see me anymore. It was so stupid in the first place to assume it was going to work,” he continued. 

“Honey, I respect your decisions and I could never be more proud of you. You’ve grown so much…” Jennifer walked towards her son, reaching over to touch his face. Finally, he looked up and met his mother’s eyes. 

“But I want you to be happy.” 

“I am happy,” Justin said, but even he wasn’t convinced. 

“I saw him at the diner,” Jennifer said, “before I came here. I went there to talk to Debbie…” she continued, trying her best not to push the subject, seeing as how Justin was reacting to the situation. Justin remained silent, guiding his mother towards the only couch in the studio. In front of the couch was a coffee table where cookies and two cups of coffee were placed. They sat down. 

“I’m not interested in anything he had to say,” Justin said, brushing off the thought of him. His mother mentioning seeing the man made him think of his tousled brown hair as if he just got out of bed when he was all dressed up in his Armani suit. How could he forget his sexy smirk and his hazel eyes? 

“Well, he really didn’t say much, just gave me a quick kiss and he was gone. He looked really sad…” 

“How’s Molly?” Justin cut in. He didn’t want to hear any more about Brian. His Mom eyed him and answered his question, but he barely listened. All he thought about was the last time they saw each other. ‘He didn‘t even say goodbye,’ he said to himself. He found it hard to swallow the coffee he was drinking. He told himself he would never cry over it. Maybe he and Brian were not meant to be, never meant to be together. 

“…boyfriend,” was the only word that registered in his mind of what his mom had said. “What about a boyfriend?” Justin asked his mother, trying to focus but losing the battle in his head.

“This guy you were with at your last exhibit, is he your boyfriend?” Jennifer repeated the question. She had a smile on her lips but not in her eyes. Apparently, her son wasn’t listening. She knew where his mind was. This made her feel sad and helpless inside. Justin laughed a little but it didn’t reach his sad blue eyes. 

“No Mom, he’s just a friend.” Justin looked at his mother straight in the eyes. He didn’t have to tell her everything… that he saw the guy a couple of times but it was nothing serious. He’s a man, and he has needs. He was pretty sure that Brian was doing the same thing back in Pittsburgh. He was sure there were no lonely nights for Brian. He felt his chest tightening. All of a sudden he just wanted to be alone.

“Well he seems like a nice young man,” Jennifer said, then continued, “Are you going to your sister’s birthday party next week?” 

“Oh yeah, sure Mom, I won’t miss it,” he assured her. But did he really want to go back to Pittsburgh so soon? Was he ready? 

“Are you bringing your friend with you? What’s his name again?” 

“Alex. And no, mother, I am not taking him with me,” Justin almost rolled his eyes as his mother pried into his love life. 

“I’m just going to see Molly, and maybe… Dad,” he saw his mother twitch a little bit when he mentioned his father. She’d been long over the divorce, but Justin knew that his father’s feelings towards him were making his mother uneasy. 

“Well, be sure to see Debbie. You know she’s been dying to see you. Oh, I almost forgot to tell you, Ted and Blake just bought a nice house right outside Liberty Avenue. They hired me to help them find a house,” his mother’s voice was ecstatic and very excited. This put a genuine smile on Justin’s lips. 

“The mansion was on the market for a couple of months but he took it off last week…” 

“Mom, why do you have to always jump to him? I am not interested,” he stressed. 

“Justin, maybe I want you to pay attention. Obviously the man didn’t want you to be here while he was back in Pittsburgh!” 

“You don’t know him. I do. He would never say he wanted me there. That’s not him,” Justin said sadly. 

“Actions speak louder than words, always remember that.” 

But there were a lot of times when Brian did things he didn’t like, Justin thought to himself. 

~~~~

Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. Justin didn’t know what he was doing in front of the building he and Brian used to frequent back in the days when it was still a bath house. Now, the building was home to the most successful advertising agency in Pennsylvania, and possibly, the whole East coast. He stood there looking at the entrance of the building. A lot of people were coming in and out. Did he want to go in to see him? He had battled over this question for a week and still hadn’t decided what he really wanted to do. He arrived at his mother’s house early the night before last, and spent time with her and Molly for her birthday. Then he went to see his father, although the latter wasn’t too thrilled to see him. Sometime last night, he thought of what Brian had told him regarding his father; he would always be hurt since he wouldn’t -- and couldn’t -- forget his father. He almost agreed with Brian after the cold treatment he received from his old man; but he was still his father. He could never turn his back on him. 

Justin was so deep in his thoughts that he didn’t even notice a nudge that was given to him. The person had to do it twice for him to notice. It was Ted. 

“Hey, Justin!” 

“Ted!” He was genuinely glad to see him. He looked very healthy and happy. Ted offered him his right hand but he decided to give him a hug instead after an awkward smile between them.

“So, you’re here in town,” Ted started happily. 

“Yeah, it’s my sister’s birthday and I wouldn’t miss it,” he said, nodding. 

“Of course, of course,” Ted agreed. “So, you saw Michael?” he continued.

“Later, I’ll stop by at the store. We’re working on our next Rage issue.” 

“That’s very good news. Well, the residents of Gayopolis have something to look forward to once more,” Ted joked. 

Justin laughed the first real laugh he’d had since Brian and he had parted. 

“Oh, congratulations for the new house; my mother told me you and Blake bought one just outside Liberty Avenue,” Justin said, very happy for Ted. 

“Yes, yes, she did help us in finding our new home. It was quite an experience, although I have been through it before. But it was sweeter the second time around,” Ted said jokingly, as he referred to the time he was buying a house with Emmett, and they had also hired Jennifer to help them. 

“That is really nice, Ted. I’m happy for you.” 

“Thank you, Justin. I am very happy for me too,” Ted’s smile was as wide as the open door he was holding. 

“Are you coming in?” Ted gestured for Justin to come in the establishment. 

Did he really want to go inside the building and see Brian? Did he want to torture himself by looking at the man he loved, knowing that he wouldn’t be able to touch him? Justin didn’t want to look helpless in front of him. He didn’t want to beg -- wait a minute, did he want to beg? Did he want to beg for Brian to come back and once again work with him in making their relationship work? He ached inside for the answers. He ached inside for the right decision to choose. But most of all he ached inside for him. He knew once he laid his eyes on him, he would want him back. He would want him in his arms once again. 

“Oh, no Ted, I was just passing by. I have to go.” He immediately walked away from Ted, who didn’t have a chance to say goodbye properly. 

Justin walked as fast as he could; it didn’t matter where he was going, but he walked away, never looking back. He felt his eyes watering and looked up the sky. It looked like it was going to rain.

~~~~

KINNETIK. “Cynthia, clear all my appointments for the next two weeks. I don’t want any phone calls for the rest of the day, and book me a flight for Toronto tomorrow morning,” Brian instructed Cynthia as he passed by her table. Cynthia was sipping her coffee and almost spilled it on herself. Brian can’t take off for two weeks! she thought to herself. 

“Brian, two weeks? You have a very important meeting with Brown next week, remember?” Cynthia reminded Brian as she followed him. 

“Yeah, well you know what to do in situations like this,” Brian turned around and smiled obnoxiously to Cynthia.

“Brian --”

“Theodore,” Brian said as he saw Ted approaching.

“Hi there, boss. I was just coming back from my lunch break,” Ted was smiling but his eyes were moving back and forth, a sign that he was anxious about something.

“Follow me to my office,” Brian said. Ted followed Brian with Cynthia on his heels. 

“Cynthia, I need you to take care of the ticket, and Theodore, you will be covering for me for the Brown meeting,” Brian said as soon as he seated himself down in his comfortable swivel leather chair. 

“One plane ticket to Toronto coming up,” Cynthia replied and turned around to go back to her table to make a couple of phone calls. 

“But Brian, I-I-I-”

“Theodore, you‘ve been working with me side by side on this account. If there was anyone in this agency more qualified to handle this account except me, it’d be you. You know all the details about it. Your, ah, convincing abilities have improved.” Ted nodded in approval. “If you fuck up, you know what’s going to happen,” Brian said, finishing his sentence with an obnoxious smirk on his tired, handsome face.

“Yes, you would have my balls on a plate. No problem, Bri,” Ted replied as he continuously nodded his head, stuffing his hands once again in his pockets.

 “You’ve been stressed a lot lately, I see,” Ted commented conversationally, took out his right hand and started tugging on his necktie. 

Brian raised an eyebrow, looked up from the file of papers in front of him and eyed Ted.

“I thought you got over stalking me, Theodore.”

“Just that you are taking off, you look like shit --”

“Coming from a person who looked like one, you would know,” cut in Brian which Ted purposely ignored. “What is this conversation all about Theodore?”

“I saw Justin outside when I was coming back from my lunch break…” 

Upon hearing this, Brian straightened up. Tingling sensations spread throughout his body.

“What did he have to say?” Brian asked calmly. He could feel the month’s worth of stress spreading from his shoulders down to his back. He sat back and folded his hands on his crossed legs, both elbows resting on the armrests of the chair.

“He said ‘Hi’, congratulated me about the new house Blake and I bought, and that he was seeing Michael tonight. Oh and it’s his sister’s birthday today. Aren’t you invited?” said Ted as his eyes moved to the couch in Brian’s office, where a good sized, fancily-wrapped box was sitting. 

“I don’t know if I should be scared or glad, Theodore, to know that you know all these about me,” Brian stood up and started walking towards the gift that was on the couch. 

“Well, Brian you can never be too lucky having me by your side as your accountant, friend --”

“And stalker. I will see you in two weeks.” Ted once again nodded his head. “Oh, and, Schmidt?”

“Huh?”

“Don’t fuck up.” Brian walked toward the main door of the establishment after once again stopping in front of Cynthia’s desk to give her one last instruction. 

~~~~

Taylor Residence, Pennsylvania. “Molly!” Jennifer’s voice was commanding. Justin’s sister just stared at the portrait he’d painted for her birthday. 

“Thanks, Justin.” She wasn’t too thrilled with the gift, Justin could tell. But Molly gave him a big hug and a kiss on the cheek, then she ran off to her friends who were starting to dig into her birthday cake. 

“Justin, she --”

“Loves it, yeah Mom. Every year, I give her practically the same birthday gift; either a sketch or a portrait, and every year she gives me the same reaction. And every year you tell me the same exact thing,” he said, smiling. 

“Oh, when she is old enough to realize the value of your portraits, she will absolutely adore them, honey.” Jennifer lovingly gazed at her son and then looked over at her youngest. 

“Right now, her happiness knows nothing but new shoes, new clothes, bigger allowance and, hmmm… a laptop?” 

Justin replied to his mother, referring to the gift she got Molly.
They started laughing together. Justin was having genuine fun when he looked at his mother’s front door. A figure stood there, a person he didn’t imagine seeing at that very moment. The man was closely watching him, he knew, although the man was wearing his dark glasses. His gray Armani suit was a little wet on the shoulders, indication of the rain that he predicted earlier while he was hurriedly escaping Kinnetik.

Jennifer immediately caught onto her son’s sudden quietness. She walked toward the door to welcome Brian. Justin didn’t follow his mother. 

“Brian, you came,” Jennifer’s excitement was inconceivable; she was also surprised to see Brian. He gave her a kiss on the cheek and a light hug. The man’s eyes didn’t leave Justin’s even for a second.

“Would you like a piece of birthday cake? The kids started a few minutes ago,” Justin overheard his mother say to Brian as they approached him.

“No, thank you, Jennifer, but I’m on a diet,” Brian replied. Justin almost rolled his eyes. He hated himself for feeling amused. 

“What are you doing here?” Justin asked. 

“It is nice to see you, too."

“Justin! I invited Brian,” Jennifer got between the two men.

“And you forgot to mention it,” Justin said, eyeing his mother. Jennifer didn’t reply but instead gestured Brian to sit down. 

“I’m not staying long, Jennifer. I have to pack for my flight tomorrow. Here is a little something for Molly,” Brian handed Jennifer the gift. It was too late to catch himself. Justin quickly moved his eyes from Brian to his mother. Brian looked at him. He didn’t know what he was thinking. ‘Where are you going?’ He wanted to ask him. 

Justin felt shivers, so he folded his arms across his chest. His thoughts couldn’t depart from what he had learned. 

“I thought you don’t celebrate birthdays,” Justin said, to move his thoughts away from the thought of Brian packing and probably flying maybe to Ibiza; and for real this time. For a second, he thought Brian was going to ignore his little remark. But then he leaned forward towards him, their faces only two inches apart.

“A lot of things have changed,” was all he said. Jennifer felt the tension between them, so she encouraged Brian to stay just for one drink. He obliged.

Jennifer led the way to her mini-bar. Justin followed his mother with Brian on his tail. Justin felt a burning sensation at the back of his neck; He knew Brian was watching him. After Jennifer served Brian a drink, she politely excused herself to check on Molly and her friends, who were gathered in the living room of the house. 

“So,” Justin said, leaving his arms crossed on his chest.

“So,” Brian mimicked. 

Justin wanted to confront Brian for not keeping in touch, but deep within, he felt tired. He wanted to give up a battle that somehow neither of them could win. 

“How are you doing?”

“You really want to know?” Justin snapped.

“How was your last exhibit?” Brian ignored his reply.

“It went well,” he lied. He’d never been so bored in his life. And he never imagined having feelings like that at his own exhibit. It was him, Justin thought, that made the exhibit unbearable, boring and lifeless. He was missing him terribly. If only he had come…

“The next one’s coming up soon,” Justin informed Brian.

“I’m sure you will do great,” Brian said, as he sipped the dark liquor from his crystal glass. “By the way, you left some of your stuff at the loft.”

Justin couldn’t believe it for a second. But then, through Brian’s dark glasses, Justin saw the familiar burn in his hazel eyes. 

“When are you available so I can pick them up?” He challenged Brian.

“Today. Right now.” Brian answered, then drank all what was left in his glass. 

~~~~

The loft. Brian opened the door and let himself in; Justin followed. A warm sensation enveloped his whole being as he entered the loft. He felt safe… he felt at home. He felt he belonged here. But reality set in when he realized what he was doing here. He was here to pick up some of his stuff that he left when he packed for New York. Brian went straight to the kitchen and opened the fridge, taking out a two bottles of cold beer. He offered one to Justin. Justin wanted to refuse but changed his mind when he saw Brian had removed his jacket and tie, and was in the process of rolling up the sleeves of his burgundy Prada shirt. He felt very thirsty all of a sudden. 

“There is some of your stuff in the bedroom,” Brian said, sipping his beer, then pointed the mouth of the bottle towards the bedroom. 

“Oh.” Justin’s thirst intensified as he followed the mouth of Brian’s beer bottle. Justin took a big sip of his own beer, then placed it down on the counter and started walking towards the bedroom. He knew damn well he wasn’t there for a couple of shirts he had left behind. 

The bedroom pretty much looked the same. Brian still had the same lights he had when he left for New York. Justin walked towards the drawers sitting not too far from the platform bed and opened the drawers, one by one, and found some of his belongings; pairs of socks here and there, some underwear, a couple of shirts, and some pants. He didn’t know why he didn’t take them out of the drawers, though. He just stood there looking at them. 

“Did you find them?“ Justin was startled. Brian was standing a little bit too close to him, his breath bathing Justin’s nape, causing him to shiver.

He turned around to answer him, “Yes, I di--” he started, but Brian grabbed him by the front of his black t-shirt and pinned him against the closet. Brian then covered Justin’s mouth with his. He felt Brian’s tongue teasing the tip of his tongue, licking the roof of his mouth, and he groaned under his breath as Brian continued his seduction. He did this for a few more seconds then Justin sucked on Brian’s tongue. It was sharp and a little painful, but it made him hard, and made him moan. He felt precum leaking from the end of his hard cock, wetting the inside of his jeans. Brian seemed to sense what was happening to his body, for he stopped what he was doing and smiled a sexy, mischievous smile. And just to tease and torture him, Brian slowed down, taking his time kissing his swollen lips. Brian nibbled on his lower, then his upper lip, moving his mouth away from his for a couple of seconds, making Justin almost cry a protest. But then Brian once again thrust his tongue back into Justin’s mouth while at the same time reaching down with his right hand to rub Justin’s hard dick through his jeans.

Reaching up, Justin unbuttoned Brian’s shirt; when it fell open, he scraped his nails from his neck down his arms shoving the shirt to the ground in a pile. He scratched over Brian’s chest and nipples down to his pants and unsnapped them, pulling out his dick and his hand back up to his mouth. When he had Brian’s attention, he licked his palm and brought it back down and started to jerk him off. Brian hissed and closed his eyes. A few strokes later he opened them up; they were completely glazed over with lust. Groaning deep in his throat, Brian spun Justin around, pressing him further into the closet door, reaching around and undoing the snap and zipper of his jeans, pulling them down below the swell of his perfect ass. Brian pulled back to reach into the drawer in front of them, pulling out a packet of lube and a condom. Slicking his fingers, he slid one inside Justin’s tight hole, then teasing him with a second until Justin was about to turn his head to tell him to hurry. Scissoring his fingers while he tore the condom open with his teeth, Brian slipped it on with his other hand; Brian was ready in just a few seconds. Pulling his fingers out, he put the head of his cock at Justin’s hole and hesitated for a second, until Justin pushed back. 

“Do it, Brian, fuck me,” Justin commanded. Brian rolled his hips forward until his entire length was buried within him. As soon as he started to push back, Brian withdrew and snapped forward; a few more hard thrusts, and neither of them were going to last. Brian reached around and pushed Justin’s hand away, and jerked him off in time with his thrusts. After a few quick thrusts, Justin came all over Brian’s hand; Brian’s cock swelled in his ass, and he bit into Justin’s shoulder through the fabric of his t-shirt as he came hard in the condom.

Pulling out, they both fell in a sweaty heap on the bed, Justin still almost fully dressed with his pants around his knees, and Brian with no shirt, kicking off his pants. 

“That was unexpected, but good.” 

“Yeah,” Brian replied, lighting a cigarette. 

Taking a drag off the cigarette Justin asked, “So, where is your trip?” 

“Toronto” Brian replied as he reclaimed his smoke and sauntered naked into the bathroom to start the shower. Justin sat there for a few minutes and listened to Brian in the shower before he left. 

To be continued…