So this chapter is a bit longer. I'm trying to update this on a more regular basis, but we will have to see how my classes go. I'm teaching 6 at the moment so it may be a while for the next chapter. I have started it though. As always, constructive criticism is always welcome. Hopefully you will all enjoy. **************************************************************** Chapter 4 Brian’s POV “Fuck Me!” “Brian!” I heard Justin yell my name, but was powerless to respond. I sank to my knees in front of the painting and just stared. Emotions from that night, long buried, wash over me and I start to shake. I feel him slip his arms around me and pull me into his chest. My mind flashes back to the dance, but quickly focuses in on the sight and sound of the bat connecting with Justin’s skull. The helplessness and terror I felt then come back full force, obliterating the bold statement my showing up was making. “Shhh. It’s okay, baby. I’m here. Fucking Hobbs didn’t win.” I feel his soft hands stroking my shoulders and arms. His heart beats against my back reminding me that he did survive. He is here and he loves me despite all the shit I’ve put him through. “I love you so much, Brian. I’m sorry you have to go through this again.” His breath whispers across my heated flesh as he slowly turns me to face him. I’m reminded of the whispered endearments exchanged on the dance floor moments before I kissed him. Kissed him in front of his classmates, declaring to those assembled that he was mine for as long as he would have me. “I’ll cover it back up. I don’t think I’m ready to get rid of it, but I promise you won’t have to see it again. I’m so sorry, Brian.” His tears mix with the ones I wasn’t even aware I was shedding. His words pull me from the pain of that night and I’m suddenly back in the role I’m familiar with. That I’m comfortable in with him. Protector. “Justin, it’s alright. You don’t have to hide it from me. It just caught me by surprise.” I wipe his tears, replacing them with tender kisses meant to offer comfort. I chuckle at the irony of the situation. “Guess now I understand your reaction a little better. This is way more than a dick doodle.” He offers me a watery smile before snuggling into my arms, seeking comfort. They wrap around him more securely. I’m constantly amazed by his faith and trust in me. He’s had more reasons than most to lose all that, but somehow he continues to believe. “Jus…Sunshine? Could we maybe move this to a more comfortable location? My ass is going numb sitting on this damn floor.” I continue to stroke his hair and back. For my own solace as much as his. He untangles himself from my arms and stands above me. Slowly he holds out his hands offering his support as I stand. “Bri? Could we? Maybe?” His voice falters a bit, unsure how to ask for what he needs. Fortunately, I need the same thing. I take his hand and lead him toward the room he walked out of a bit ago. His bedroom, if you could call it that, is an 8x8 square. His double “bed” is actually a mattress and box springs on the floor shoved against one wall. Pictures of our little family cover the cracks in the walls. On his dresser and night stand are sculptures and pictures that Gus made for him before he and the munchers moved to Canada. We stretch out on the bed and I smile at Justin’s sentimentality. He probably thinks I won’t notice; but his pillows, sheets and duvet are copies of the ones at the loft. I lean against the pillows while he lays his head on my chest. We just lay there quietly for a while, each lost in our own thoughts, needing the connection of physically touching. Eventually his breathing evens out and he sleeps. I continue to run my fingers through his hair, reveling in the silky feel. As I start to drift into sleep, I whisper into his hair, “I love you so much, Sunshine. I’ll never let anything happen to you.” ******************** I wake up a couple hours later with Justin still wrapped in my arms. They tighten, pulling him closer. There’s a part of me that wants to pack him up and drag his ass back to the Pitts. Part of it is a protection thing sure. I don’t like the idea of him being here, alone, without his usual support system. Another part of it is I miss him. I miss him in my bed sure, but I miss his presence in my life too. My mind drifts over the lazy Sundays hanging out at the loft talking about philosophy and debating politics. Coming home after a for shit day at work to see him painting or sketching, the smells of some low-carb dinner permeating the loft. I can’t bring him back though. I know that. He needs this chance to be a success. And he will be a huge fucking success. I just have to hope he comes back to me when he makes it. He’s starting to wake up. I can tell he’s trying to fight it, attempting to burrow deeper into the covers. I shift slightly and begin to trail kisses across his face. Justin’s POV When I first start to wake up a bit of panic runs through me. As I’m shifted to my side, I remember where I am, and more importantly, who I’m with. Brian trails kisses along my jaw. I smile as his tongue traces my lips. My own tongue darts out to play with his. “Hey.” “Hey, how you feeling?” Brian props himself on his elbows staring down at me. “I’m okay. I’ve had several days to get used to what that painting means. How are you?” I cup his face with my hand, forcing his eyes to meet mine. “Shocked. Pissed you didn’t tell me when I talked to you. Concerned.” His eyes reveal the truth of his words and I reach up to softly kiss his lips. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you what was going on.” I kiss him again, a little firmer, hoping he will accept my apology and hear the truth in my words. “I didn’t want to tell you over the phone because I knew it would be emotional. For you and for me. I wanted to be able to see you, hold you, feel your heart beating when I told you I remembered the prom.” I touch his chest, feeling his strong Irish heart beating a rhythm of love. “I wanted to be with you when I told you I remember the words you spoke to me on the dance floor. The love I felt then and feel now wrapped in your arms.” I shift us back so I’m once again laying with my head on his chest. I let my hand trail along his chest, playing lightly with the baby fine hair surrounding his nipple. “Why didn’t you tell me what you said on the dance floor?” My tone wasn’t accusing. I suspected the reasons already, but wanted to hear what Brian would say. His hands covered mine, stilling my movements. He tilted my head so he could stare into my eyes. I ache for the pain reflecting back from those hazel depths. “It took everything I had to show up that night. You know I’m all about actions speaking for words. I knew you would understand what my showing up was saying. You were so ‘on to me.’” Brian smiled through the pain, kissing the end of my nose. “I knew you knew how I felt, how I had felt for a while. Our dance was so ‘Ridiculously Romantic,’ and we were so free on that dance floor that I let the moment carry me away. I gave in to the happiness I was feeling and ten minutes later god saw fit to punish me for daring to find joy in life.” “Brian! NO! You can’t think…” I twisted up, cupping his face in my hands. I let my thumbs trail under his eyes, brushing away the tears. I settled back into his arms knowing that we had to get through this, had been needing to clear the air for years. “I see, saw, the bashing as my punishment for daring to reach for what I wanted, for more than my black heart deserved.” I started to protest again, but his arms just tightened around me, using me as an anchor. “When you came out of the coma and couldn’t remember shit, I took it as further proof that god was punishing me.” “Brian, god wouldn’t punish you for loving me. That’s just what your bitch of a mother wants you to believe.” My hand makes soothing passes over Brian’s chest. “If god wasn’t punishing me, why the hell did you have to take a bad to the head? Fuck, if I didn’t deserve it, you sure as fuck didn’t.” “Bri, listen to me. Are you listening?” He lightly smacks me on the arm and I feel his smirk as I use one of his favorite phrases against him. “Hobbs came to the prom that night intent on doing me harm. He didn’t play baseball. He played football and ran track. He got that baseball bat from one of his friends and put it in his car that afternoon.” I pause to look into his eyes to make sure that what I’m saying is getting through to him and that he believes. “If you hadn’t been there I probably would have died that night. You not only warned me, but you prevented him from taking another swing. Daphne’s hell on wheels, but do you really believe she could have stopped him?” I place my hands on his cheeks and kiss him tenderly. “You saved me that night. I’m just sorry it took me so long to remember the best part of that night.” “Jus, why didn’t you tell me this about Hobbs before? I’m not saying it would have alleviated my guilt, too many years of catholic education to do that, but it might have helped. I might not have pushed you away so spectacularly if I had known.” I notice a bit of the pain lifting from his golden eyes and hope that we are finally healing from Hobbs’ attack. “No one wanted me to talk about the bashing. Everyone thought I should just put it behind me. It wasn’t until I talked to someone after my Pink Posse phase that I understood just how much I needed to talk about it. Jared, Chris’ friend who gave him the bat, came to see me after my confrontation with Chris and explained his part in the mess.” I rest my head against Brian’s chest again and let my hand trail down his chest to his abdomen and back again. “I guess he was afraid I would come after him next. Anyway, by the time I figured out what happened you had pushed me off Mount Kinney, again, and then we were dealing with your treatments and recovery from cancer. In the grand scheme of things it didn’t seem that important and I forgot about it.” I let my hand trail down his abs again and lightly played with the top of his pubic hair. If I didn’t know better I would swear he conditioned it. The curls were soft and springy as I ran my fingers through it, lightly scratching as I bring my hand back up to trail feather light touches around his belly button. I hear his breath hitch and I see his cock twitch. “Keep that up little boy and I will have to fuck you into this pitiful excuse for a mattress.” “Promise?” My own breath hitches as I try to control the rapidly building desire. “Justin.” That one word, said with such longing, goes strait to my cock. “Brian. Take me. Love me. I know we still have things to discuss, but I really need to be connected to you right now. I need to know that we are okay.” I punctuate my sentences with kisses along Brian’s jaw, neck and chest. “You first, baby. I need…please.” Brian’s words cause me to stop my fairy kisses. I raise my head from his stomach and am floored by the longing and need I see reflected in his face. It’s rare for Brian to allow me to top him and practically unheard of for him to ask for it. Thank god we brought the condoms and lube in from the other room. I leaned up, allowing Brian to scoot down the bed. Reverently I place a pillow under his hips, exposing his ass. My hands caress his thighs, spreading them wider. I place moist kisses along each thigh starting at his knee and working my way to the juncture, never quite reaching his dick. Nips and nibbles replace kisses and his continuous groans let me know it’s driving him crazy. Finally, I begin to pay homage to his leaking cock, starting at the base, licking up the shaft and swirling my tongue around and over the head. Brian fists his hands in my hair, growling his appreciation. After repeating the teasing process, I hollow my cheeks and relax my throat. I suck his straining member deep into my throat, humming slightly. He arches up off the mattress and with a shutter comes down my throat. I pull back slightly and continue sucking his release from him. I rub his stomach lightly as the aftershocks continue to rock through him. Brian’s POV My body is just beginning to calm down from that intense blowjob and subsequent orgasm when I realize that Justin is rubbing my stomach in slow circles. “Damn, Sunshine, that was fucking awesome. Where did you learn that?” He gives me a patented Kinney smirk before replying, “The Kinney School of Sex. I learned that particular maneuver in Advanced Blowjobs 301.” “What else did you learn?” I give him my own tongue-in-cheek smirk. “I bet you graduated at the top of your class too.” “Well, there were all of your basic classes: Rimming 101, Fundamentals of Phone sex, and classes such as that. It’s the advanced classes that really taught me the true skills. I had an exacting instructor who spent hours making me practice. Bottom-boy prep was a particular favorite, though I didn’t get near as much practice in this particular skill.” Again he mimics my patented smirk, before adopting an air of innocence. “Would you care for a demonstration? Sir.” Little fucker. I spread my legs a little and scoot down, presenting my tight virginal ass for his and my pleasure. “Get to it then.” “With pleasure.” He punctuates his statement with a delicate lick to the space between my balls and ass. He quickly follows that with a firmer swipe of his tongue. Slowly he flicks the tip of his tongue around my pucker, causing my already sensitive nerve endings to zing with renewed passion. I get lost in the sensations his talented tongue is creating. Without warning, Justin’s tongue invades my quivering hole and my cock that was semi-erect suddenly springs to full alert. Our moans of pleasure mingle as he continues to fuck me with his tongue. He’s the only one who elicits such responses from me. While I had bottomed before Justin, it was extremely infrequent and never with as much intensity as I’m feeling now. I feel the familiar tingle in the base of my spine and marvel at my blond boy’s ability to get me off for a second time, and this time without direct cock stimulation. I open my eyes and bring my hand to my cock to jerk myself off in time with Justin’s thrusts of his tongue. His gaze flicks to my movements, and his left hand joins mine and together we bring me to my second orgasm of the hour. “Damn, Justin. You get top marks for everything.” I run my fingers through his blond locks as I struggle to regain my breathing. “Just wait. We haven’t even gotten to the main event yet.” I feel, rather than see, his smug smile as he rests his head on my hip. “You’re going to kill me, Sunshine. There are easier ways to get at my money you know.” I regret the words as soon as they leave my mouth. I glance quickly at Justin’s face and am relieved to see that he’s taken it as the joke it was intended to be. “Give me a minute to recoup and I will do my best to climax you into an early grave. What better way to go.” He slowly strokes his cock, bringing it to hardness again. I smirk with satisfaction knowing he got as much pleasure from rimming me as I go from being rimmed. “Here, let me help with that.” I flip us over so I am lying on top of him. I trail kisses down his chest, stopping to rim his belly button. After a few licks I continue to his cock, lapping up the pre-come that had started to bubble out. I give a few teasing strokes around the head, then suck the engorged cock into my throat. His body arched off the bed and he moaned in the back of his throat. After a few more licks and bobs, I work my way back up to his mouth, kissing as I go. I kiss him deeply, letting our tongues duel. After several minutes, with both of us panting with desire, I reach for a condom from the side of the bed and maneuver to put it on him. I pop the cap on the lube and squirt a generous amount onto his dick working it over the latex. I then use the extra to prepare my ass. I watch his eyes glaze over with lust as I work my fingers in and out of my tight opening. “Brian, god, you look so damn hot. I can’t wait to fuck you. Feel your tight ass wrapped around my cock.” “Ready, baby?” I slowly begin to lower myself onto his pulsating cock as he helps guide it to my hole. “You feel so good filling me. Stretching me.” “Aaagghh…so tight. So good.” I watch him strain to keep from pumping his hips. He lets me control the pace, giving me time to adjust to his fullness. Finally, he’s completely in and I rest for a moment concentrating on relaxing my sphincter muscles. In a matter of moments the initial pinch of pain is replaced with pleasure at being filled by Justin so completely. Slowly I being to move up and down, rotating my hips back and forth on the downward thrust, hitting those sweet spots that are rarely stimulated. Justin, placing his hands on my hips, thrusts up into each downward push. “I’ve missed you so much, Brian. I’ve missed fucking you, loving you.” He reached up with his right hand and pulled me down into a kiss so carnal, so passionate, my toes curled. His tongue mimicked his dick, thrusting into my mouth only to retreat and lick the edge of my lips and then thrust again. “More. Please more.” I can’t believe the words poring form me as we continue to rock and thrust, every third jab hitting my prostate, sending shivers racing up and down my spine. “Close, baby. So close.” Justin angles me back up slightly to reach between us and grab the base of my dick squeezing. His other hand grabs my hips to stop my bouncing. Frustrated at being denied release when I was so close, I ground out, “Damn it. Why did you stop? We were both so close.” He gently brushes a strand of hair away from my back before answering, “I want it to last, for both of us. I want you to be able to still feel me when you go home. I want to watch you, stare into those beautiful hazel eyes, as you find that release and surrender to what we share. Surrender to our connection that time and distance can’t diminish.” He punctuated each sentence with a thrust, causing us both to moan with pleasure. I slowly lifted off him to change our positions. He again placed the pillow under my hips and kissed my inner thighs. He then kneeled between my legs to replace the condom, adding another dollop of lube. “Fuck me baby. Make me feel so good.” He guided his cock to my pucker again and pushed in with one long stroke. “Yeah. Aaarrrggghhhh…burns so good.” My legs wrapped around his waist as he began to thrust in a slow steady rhythm. “So tight, so good. So…Brian!” He threw his head back as he lost himself in the sensations. “Justin? Baby? Look at me.” With considerable effort he opened his baby blues as he continued to thrust. “I love you. I love you fucking me, loving me. So good.” Words become impossible as we both near our orgasms. He kept up the slow torturous rhythm, forcing a slow build toward our final blissed state. Our gazes never wavered as the tingle built and washed over us. My come splashed Justin’s chest as he slumped over me, having reached his own climax within seconds of mine. I pulled him closer, wrapping my arms around his back as we both fought to catch our breaths. “Bri?” He tried to lift off me, but I just tightened my arms. “Shhh…rest. We have plenty of time to talk.” I run my fingers through his hair. His breathing evens out pretty quickly. When his softened cock slips out I mourn the loss for a moment, finally understanding what Justin has told me for years. I shift him gently and go to the bathroom to clean up. I return to the bed with a warm washcloth and clean the sleeping boy/man, removing the condom, trying it off and tossing it into the trash. Domestic necessities completed, I lay back down and Justin immediately snuggles into my side, resting his head on my shoulder. I pull up the covers and place a light kiss to his temple. “I love you, baby. Never doubt that.” I too, finally succumb to sleep safe once again with my baby in my arms.