September 11, 2001 It was a beautiful fall day in Manhattan as Justin Taylor and his 4-year-old daughter, Constance Taylor, walked along the street beside the Twin Towers of the World Trade Center. Justin was on his way to drop Connie off at pre-school on his way to work. Traffic was light despite the fact that it was nearly nine o’clock on a Tuesday morning. “Daddy?” Connie said. “Yes, Sunshine.” “Can we have pizza for dinner?” Justin pursed his lips thinking. “Pleeeeeease.” “I think we can do that.” Justin said smiling as his daughter’s face lit up in a sunshine smile. Justin listened to Connie as she prattled on. As much of a motor mouth as her mother had been. Justin smiled sadly. His wife, Daphne, had died suddenly of a brain aneurysm during childbirth. Justin had been devastated by the loss. But, Connie was the very image of her mother, except for the blue eyes and patented Taylor mega-watt smile. Connie’s presence comforted Justin as much as he comforted her in the months after her birth and Daphne’s death. The sudden sound of a loud plane engine pulled Justin from his thoughts of his lost wife. He was just about to comment on how low the plane sounded when he looked up. He watched awestruck as the plane suddenly crashed into the top of northern face of the North Tower of World Trade Center. “Oh my God.” He breathed as the resulting explosion rocked the very ground he stood on. “Oh my God.” He repeated as he looked around. Others on the street stood in shock looking up as the black smoke billowed off of the North Tower. Justin grabbed for Connie’s hand and pulled her to him. Within seconds the sound of sirens filled the air. Justin hurried along the street knowing that he had to get Connie and himself away from Twin Towers. What if it collapses? Justin thought as he picked Connie up and continued on his way. Fearfully glancing up at the burning tower. Again Justin heard the sound of an airplane engine and looked up to see yet another low flying plane. He watched in absolute horror as this plane hit the south face of the South Tower. The explosion rocked the ground beneath his feet again causing him to stumble nearly falling. More sirens filled the air as Justin hitched Connie further up into his arms and continued his trek away from the World Trade Center buildings. He was amazed at the number of people who simply stood and watched as the buildings continued to burn. What if they both collapse? He thought frantically and began pushing his way through the crowd of on-lookers determined to get as far away as possible. -- Brian Kinney sat in the firehouse on the morning after what had to have been the most boring night of his career. There hadn’t even been a peep. No fires, no jumpers, no accidents, not even a cat stuck in a tree. He rolled his neck and looked at the clock. Fifteen more minutes until his relief would show up. Franklin had called around 7:30 and said that he was going to be late because his sitter hadn’t shown up yet. Brian shrugged it off. It wasn’t like he had anyone to go home to anyway. His personal life had become nearly tomb-like lately. Yeah, he went out to the clubs when he was off and he even got his fair share of ass, but there was a big difference between his ‘personal life’ and his ‘sex life’. He yawned then headed into the kitchen to see if there was any coffee left. He was almost there when the alarm sounded. “Come on Kinney.” Jeff Wagner, the chief, said. “Hey, I was supposed to be off almost an hour ago.” “I don’t need to know your schedule, Kinney.” Wagner said flatly. “The WTC just exploded. Move.” “What?” “The alarm is for all stations, ALL stations, Kinney.” Wagner continued. “From the reports I’ve heard, two planes just crashed into the Twin Towers.” “Holy fuck!” Brain said as he pushed passed the chief. He headed into the truck bay and expertly pulled on his turn-out gear pulling his helmet from the peg above his coat. He jumped onto the truck and strapped in. This is gonna get ugly. He thought as the truck roared out into the streets of Manhattan. -- “Daddy, I’m scared.” Connie called to Justin as she clung to him. “I know, Baby.” Justin said. “So am I. But, we’re going to be all right. We’re going to try and make it to the subway.” “Okay.” Connie said in a small fear filled voice. Justin tried to smile at her. She tried to smile back. They both failed. Justin hurried to the closest subway station only to find it had been shut down and was in the process of being evacuated. All the other trains were being diverted from the area. Justin swore to himself then started looking for any form of transportation. No cabs. Emergency vehicles had busses jammed. Fuck. Justin thought. “Sweetie.” Justin said looking down at Connie. “I need you to go piggy-back for Daddy. It’ll be easier for Daddy to move faster. Okay.” She nodded and dutifully moved around her hands wrapping around Justin’s neck. “Not so tight, Sunshine. Daddy has to breathe.” “Sorry, Daddy.” Justin didn’t know exactly where to go, so he simply started moving again. Moving away from the smoke and danger. He glanced up at the towers and saw that the south tower had begun to sway. “Fuck me.” He breathed. He barely heard the sharp in take of breath from Connie who was not used to her father using such language. -- Brian drummed his fingers on his thigh nervously as his fire truck pulled within a block of the South Tower. Taking off his headphones, he jumped down from the truck. They dolled out the fire hose and hooked up to a hydrant. The Chief was shouting orders through a bullhorn. It was all going as it was meant to. It was all going like it had a hundred, maybe a thousand, times before. “Holy Fuck!” Someone yelled causing them all to turn and see what was happening. The South Tower had begun to sway dangerously. Then slowly as if in slow motion it started to collapse. The top floors falling on top of the lower ones. It was coming down and coming down fast. Brian stared at it for a moment mesmerized by the sight of this enormous building collapsing like a house of cards. As people ran past him screaming, Brian pulled on the facemask of his S.C.O.T pack them moved toward the Towers. He then caught sight of a blond man carrying a little girl struggling to get away from the on-coming danger. Brian knew that the man didn’t have a chance in hell of out running the wall of dust, smoke and debris bearing down on them. Brian ran to them grabbed the man by the arms dragging him and the girl out of the street and into a doorway. Once in the doorway Brian roughly pushed the man down and covered both he and the girl with his body taking the brunt of the onslaught. He could feel the heat as well as the odd bite of still smoldering debris as it glanced off his back. It seemed to take forever or maybe time was just moving more slowly. Brian didn’t know which, but slowly the sound of falling debris trickled off until he felt safe enough to pull away from the people beneath him. The both started coughing immediately. That was a good sign. Brian thought. Means they’re alive. “Are you an angel?” The little girl asked through coughing fits. “No, ma’am.” Brian said smiling after removing his facemask. “I’ve never been accused of being an angel.” “Daddy?” She turned to her father. “Daddy?!” Brian turned to find the blond gasping for air. “Fuck.” He grabbed the man before he could fall. “Inhaler?” “He keeps it in his inside jacket pocket.” The little girl said. Brian reached into the jacket pocket and pulled out the inhaler. He placed it to the man’s lips. “Breath in.” Brian instructed as he gave the device a healthy squeeze. Justin breathed in the vapor, coughed once then passed out. “Fuck.” Brian swore as he held the other man up. Making a snap decision he placed his facemask on the other man and looked down at the little girl. “Sweetheart, what’s your name?” “Constance Renee Taylor.” “That’s a beautiful name.” Brian said smiling. “Do they call you Connie?” Connie nodded. “I thought so.” He then lifted the blond in to his arms. “What’s your Daddy’s name?” “Justin Matthew Taylor.” Connie said without hesitation. “Well, Connie.” Brian began. “I have to get your Daddy some help.” Connie nodded. “He needs a doctor. Okay?” Connie nodded again. “What I need you to do is grab on to my coat and don’t let go. Don’t let go for anything in the world. Okay?” “Okay.” Connie said then frowned. “Mister, what’s that noise?” Brian didn’t know what she meant at first, then slowly a high-pitched whistling noise seemed to be coming from everywhere at once. “That is a warning signal firefighters use.” Brian explained. “See we have to keep moving when we’re in a dangerous situation.” Connie nodded. “If we stop moving, it could mean we’re hurt or trapped. That high-pitched whistle helps anybody coming to look for us to find us.” “Oh.” She said softly. “Yeah.” Brian nodded. “Now, hold on tight and let’s get the fu, um, let’s get out of here.” Slowly Brian made his way through the dust and smoke. He tried not to think about the fact that the other tower could come down at any moment. He only focused on the end of the street he was on. He heard voices and looked up to see the telltale flashing light of an ambulance. Thank God. He thought and tried to call to the EMTs but found he couldn’t speak. He coughed a couple of times then stumbled. He started to crumple to the ground when someone took the blond from him. He tried to reach for him then felt a plastic mask being placed over his mouth and nose and the pressure of arms under his dragging him toward the ambulance himself. Brian breathed in. The feel of actual oxygen in his lungs felt nearly orgasmic. “He – needs –.” He tried to say, but coughed again despite the oxygen. “Mister?” He heard a small voice say. “You okay? Mister?” He wanted to tell the little girl that he was fine, but his throat felt hot and scratchy. He looked over and saw that he was laid out next to the blond. The blond was on a stretcher with an oxygen mask on, too. He was very still. Brian was laid out on what usually was a seat. He felt the sudden urge to touch the other man, but couldn’t find the energy to lift his arm. “You all just hold on.” Said the EMT. “We’ll have you to the hospital in now time.” Brian lifted his head and looked out the back window of the ambulance. The last thing he saw was the North Tower as it too collapsed. He coughed and put his head back down. God, I hope the others are all right. He thought just before he lost consciousness. -- Justin heard very distant voices near his bed. He opened his eyes slowly and found himself looking up into the very worried face of his mother. “Mom?” He said his voice rough and scratchy. “Oh, Justin.” Jennifer said her voice filled with emotion. “I was beginning to think you’d never wake up.” “Connie?” He gasped and tried to sit up. “Connie is fine.” Jennifer said. “She’s right outside with her grandfather.” “Craig is here?” Justin asked wondering why the hell his estranged father would show up. “No, Sweetheart, not Craig.” Jennifer gently corrected. “Daphne’s parents are here.” Justin nodded. “I want to bring Connie in to see you. She’s been very worried.” Justin nodded again. Jennifer walked to the door and motioned to someone outside. Within seconds Justin had his arms full of scared little girl. “Daddy.” Connie said hugging Justin tightly. “I was so scared, Daddy.” “I know, Sweetie.” Justin said hugging Connie just as tightly. “But, we made it though just like I said we would.” Connie nodded. “Thanks to the Angel.” Connie said. “Angel?” Justin asked confused. “The Angel in the fireman’s clothes.” Connie said. “He saved us from all the bad stuff then he carried you to the doctor’s place.” Justin vaguely remembered a firefighter grabbing him and Connie and pushing them into a doorway away from the rumble barreling down the street. He also kind of remembered the feeling of being carried, but it was like a dream. “Yeah.” Justin said as he smoothed the little girl’s hair. “He was an Angel all right.” -- Brian awoke to a silent room. He didn’t really remember why he was here until he took a breath and started to cough. He looked around the room and realized he was in a hospital. He pressed the call button. “Well, well, well.” A petite brunette nurse said as she entered. “Welcome back to the living.” Brian rolled his eyes. “I’m Melanie and I’ll be your nurse this morning.” “Thirsty.” Brian rasped. “Let me see.” Melanie said as she glanced over his chart. “Looks like a little water won’t kill you.” She lifted his head placing a straw to his lips. Brian drank the water greedily. He couldn’t believe how thirsty he was or how good it tasted. “Easy now.” Melanie said. She pulled the glass away setting it on the table next to his bed. “You are one lucky man, did you know that?” Brian shook his head. “You’re lucky you managed to stumble onto a waiting emergency team. Why would you put yourself in danger like that? Why wouldn’t you at least buddy breathe?” “Guy needed oxygen worse than me.” Brian said softly his throat sore. “Asthma attack. And, he had a little girl.” His eyes flew up. “Where are they?” He asked. “The little girl and her father. They were with me.” “I don’t know, but I can try to find out.” She said. “Please.” Brian said grasping her hand for emphasis. “I’ll go see what I can find.” She pulled his hand free and smiled before leaving the room. Brian was unconscious again before the door even closed. -- “Hey Bro. Wake up Buddy.” A voice called. Brian focused on it and opened his eyes. “Son of a bitch. You have any idea how much you scared us.” Brian looked up at his brother Michael and smirked as best he could. “Asshole.” He said but he was smiling. “Hey Kiddo.” Brian turned to see Debbie standing on the other side of the bed. “How are you feeling?” “Like a building fell on me.” Brian rasped. “Smart ass.” Debbie said. “Did you hear?” She asked suddenly serious. Brian shook his head. “Both towers collapsed. Another plane hit the Pentagon building in Washington and a fourth plane went down in a field a few miles outside Pittsburgh.” “Christ.” Brian croaked. “The whole city is in an uproar. Hell, the whole world.” Debbie continued as tears welled in her eyes. “Giuliani has shut down the subways, and all access to the island. Shut down the whole fucking city. Thousands are missing and presumed dead.” Brian pressed his lips together. “The President’s talking war. They think that fucker Bin Laden may have been behind it all.” “The guys?” Brian asked referring to the others at his fire station. “There are a lot of rumors going around.” Michael said grimly. “You guys were some of the first to respond.” Michael looked grave. “We’ve heard from a couple people, but more than half of them are missing, too.” Brian was overcome by emotion. He had always considered the guys at the station to be just as much his family as the two people standing in the room with him. Tears streamed down his face as his brother and best friend held him. Debbie pulled them both into her arms trying desperately to comfort them but didn’t even know where to begin. -- ~One month later~ “Are you sure about this, Justin?” Jennifer asked for what had to be the millionth time. “I’m coming out, Mom. End of discussion.” Justin stated flatly. “And, I’ll not discuss it any longer.” Jennifer put her hands up not wanting to upset him. “Daphne knew. She even told me it was all right if I wanted to ‘do something about it’. I didn’t. I wouldn’t have. I took my vows very seriously. But, Daph is gone and has been for over 4 years now. I can’t keep pretending. I don’t want to.” “And, Connie?” “I explained it too her. At least as much as she could understand.” Justin said. “She’ll be fine. She’s always been able to talk to me and I don’t think that’s going to change.” “What about this firefighter and the publicity?” Jennifer asked solemnly. “I want to meet him.” Justin said. “He saved my life, Mom. He saved her life.” He nodded his head toward Connie as she sat in front of the TV eating cookies and drinking chocolate milk. “I was lucky to have even found out who he was. And, the fact that we survived when all those other people died.” Justin shook his head. “I need to talk to him. I need – I need someone who can understand.” Jennifer nodded her understanding. Life had changed so dramatically that day just one month ago. The world was a much different place now and Justin was a much different man. Scarred by what happened to him, he became a little more hardened than he had been. He became fiercely overprotective of Connie to the point of fanaticism in the days after the attack, and had just started to let up a little. “Okay.” Jennifer said. “I can understand that. I guess.” The door buzzer went off then and Justin went over to answer it. “Yes.” “Mr. Taylor.” A male voice said. “The car from the TV station is here to pick you up.” “Thanks.” He looked at Jennifer. “I’ll be back in few hours. Be good Sunshine.” “I will Daddy.” Connie called. “You gonna watch?” Jennifer nodded and Justin tried to smile. He kissed her on the cheek and left the apartment. -- Brian sat nervously at the table in the station house. He didn’t know what he was so nervous about. Sure it had been nearly a month since he’d seen the blond man whose life he’d saved, but he was just another person, right? Somehow that didn’t ring true. “You about ready, Kiddo.” Debbie said coming in and sitting next to him. “Ready as I’ll ever be.” Brian returned. Debbie patted the back of his hand. “I want you to know, Sweetie, that I have never been so proud of you in my whole life.” Brian looked up at her his eyes misty. “I always have been, but the way you put yourself in harms way for that man and his daughter. I just don’t know what to say.” She smiled and a tear spilled from her eye and slowly tracked its way down her cheek. “Thanks, Ma.” He said and gently wiped the tear away. “But, I was just doing my job. Aside from the enormity of it all, that’s the bottom line. It’s my job.” “Well, doesn’t change how damned proud I am of you.” Debbie said lightly smacking him on the cheek. “So, what was the reaction here, you know, about you being gay?” “Mixed, at first.” Brian said. “I mean it wasn’t like I was hiding it. I just didn’t broadcast it.” Debbie nodded. “Some of the guys were kinda hostile for a day or two, but they seem to be coming around. I guess they decided that I am the same old Brian after all. And, considering all the guys we lost. I guess holding a grudge seems petty.” “Hey, Bri.” Michael called as he entered the kitchen. “The car from the TV station is here with that guy you saved.” Brian nodded. He straighten his uniform for what was probably the hundredth time since he put it on and stood up. The cameras came in first. The technicians set up a couple of lights and microphones. Then a pretty blond reporter from a local TV station came in followed by Justin. The camera came on and she began to speak into it. “Good Morning New York.” She said pleasantly. “I’m Lindsay Peterson reporting from the kitchen of Ladder Company 663. Today marks the one month anniversary of the attacks on the World Trade Center and The Pentagon that rocked the nation.” She paused and glanced around. “Today, one of the survivors of that attack will meet the man responsible for his rescue.” She turned to Justin. “Can you tell us a little about what happened the morning of the attack?” Justin cleared his throat. “I was on my way to drop my daughter off at pre-school when the first plane hit the North Tower.” Justin explained. “It was very surreal. Like watching something out of a movie. But, I knew I had to get out of there. I had to get my little girl to safety. So, I started walking as fast as I could away from the tower.” He paused a moment trying to control his emotions. “Then when I looked up and saw the second plane hit the South Tower, I knew something was up. Something bad.” “When did you meet up with Fireman Kinney?” Lindsay asked. “That’s kinda vague really.” Justin said. “I just remember trying to get away from the tower and then it started to collapse. All I remember is someone grabbing me by the arm and dragging me toward a doorway. Then it was dark for a while.” Lindsay nodded. “When Fireman Kinney pulled away from us, all I remember is fighting to breathe. I’m asthmatic. The smoke and dust triggered an attack.” Lindsay turned to Brian. “What did you do then, Fireman Kinney?” “I realized what was going on immediately.” Brian said. “One of my friend’s kid’s has asthma, so I asked about his inhaler.” Lindsay nodded. “Mr. Taylor’s daughter told me where to find it and I helped him use it. His lungs cleared somewhat, but with all the smoke and dust, he still couldn’t breath very well. So, I put my facemask on him. He needed to breathe. And he couldn’t breathe the crap in the air, so I did the only thing I could think to do.” “And you saved Mr. Taylor’s life.” Lindsay stated. “I’ve said this a lot lately, but it’s still true.” Brian stated. “I was just doing my job. I couldn’t not do it.” Justin stepped between Lindsay and Brian. “I still want to thank you, Mr. Kinney. Thank you for giving me back to my daughter.” Justin offered the other man his hand who took it then pulled the smaller man into a hug. Tears spilled from both of them as they embraced. The cameraman moved in for a better angle, but Lindsay stopped him placing her hand over the camera lens. She shook her head then redirected the camera away from the two men. “As you can see, a very emotional meeting on a very emotional anniversary.” Lindsay said. “Now, back to Richard in the newsroom.” The light on the camera went off and the camera crew started pulling down the equipment they’d set up only a few minutes before. -- Later in the kitchen of the firehouse, Justin sat across from Brian drinking coffee and trying to make small talk. After several stops and awkward silences, they began to talk. “How’s your little girl?” Brian asked. “Connie’s fine.” Justin said smiling. “She’s with my mother right now.” “Shouldn’t you be getting home or something?” Brian asked looking at the clock. “No, I told Mom I’d be home in a few hours.” Justin said. “She knows where I am.” Brian nodded. “The reason I wanted to meet you had more to do with just my being rescued, though.” Brian arched an eyebrow. “I mean I know from the news that a lot of the firefighters from you station were lost in the collapse.” Brian nodded gravely. “And, I guess, I just wanted to let you know that I know how you feel.” Brian looked at him questioningly. “We survived. When others that we know didn’t. I had fiends in the North Tower when it came down. And, I just wanted, well, needed to connect with someone who knows what that’s like.” “So, you want to be friends?” Brian asked doubtfully. “I don’t know.” Justin said shaking his head. “I do know that without you I probably wouldn’t be here. Me or Connie. I guess I don’t know what exactly it is I wanted to accomplish by coming here.” “Closure.” Brian said softly. Justin nodded. “Unfortunately, I don’t think it exists in situation.” Brian closed his eyes to halt the wave of emotion welling up inside him. “I survived and yet half of the guys at my station are still considered missing. Makes me wonder why. Why did I live and all those guys die? What made me so special?” “I don’t know.” Justin said. “I was supposed to have an 8:30 meeting that morning, but it was cancelled because a representative for the company missed his flight and it had to be postponed.” He laughed ruefully. “Otherwise, I would have been in the North Tower when the plane hit. Why am I here? I don’t have a fucking clue.” Justin cleared his throat. “Maybe it was kismet or fate, or destiny, or just plain blind luck. But, I’m not wasting the second chance God gave me.” “Meaning?” “Meaning, I stop pretending to be something I’m not.” Justin looked at the other man trying to gauge his reaction. “I married my late wife because he was pregnant. She got pregnant because she wanted me to be her first even though she knew I was -.” Justin paused. “Even though she knew I was gay.” Brain put his coffee cup down and stared intently at the man across from him. “We had such a good relationship. She was my best friend. I loved her. And, when she died unexpectedly during Connie’s birth, I was devastated. I had lost my wife and my best friend.” Justin stopped to clear his throat once again. “But, after all this, I realize that life is just too short to play games. To pretend. To hide.” “I know how that goes.” Brian offered. “The only people in my life who know me, I mean really know me are my adopted Mother, Debbie, and my Brother, Michael.” Brian explained. “See, I – uh – came out to my parents when I was 15. Accidentally. They caught me with someone. Needless to say they didn’t take it very well. Dad put me in the hospital while Mom stood by and watched him beat the crap out of me.” Justin stared at the other man shocked. “I went to live in a foster home. Now, you can say what you want about foster parents, but my Mom is amazing.” Brian smiled at the thought. “She even decided to adopt me.” Justin smiled. “She and Michael are the best things in my life. When I came out to Debbie, she damned near threw me a party. And then sat me down to explain the gay facts of life.” Brian snorted a laugh. “That’s my Mom.” “I’d like to meet them.” Justin said suddenly. “Your mom and your brother. If I could, I’d like to meet them and you all could meet my mom and they could meet Connie.” Brian shrugged. “I don’t have much of an extended family. My father’s parents don’t speak to us and my mother’s parents have been dead since I was very young.” He looked at Brian hopefully. “We could have a cookout or something.” “Be one big happy family?” Brian asked sarcastically. “No, not in the conventional way.” Justin said. “But, we could try being unconventional.” “Yeah, we could try that.” Brian said noncommittally. Justin smiled. Brian smiled back. Justin reached for the other man’s hand and Brian laced their hands together. “Unconventional.” He repeated. The end.