I fucking TOLD you I’d screw up our friendship. His legs are wrapping around me and he’s kissing my neck, expecting some kind of response. 

I feel like such an asshole.

You’re supposed to lose your virginity to someone who loves you, not a fuck-up like me. WHY, fucking WHY did I let my dick think for me?

He’s never going to forgive me. This is it Kinney, you are finally going to push him to his limit. People can only take so much shit before they leave. 

“Brian?” A look of realization is taking over his face. He knows. Shit. I see the tears welling up in his eyes and I brace myself. See, you don’t understand, I can’t fucking stand it when Justin cries because then I know he’s hurting. And there is no worse feeling in the world than being the cause of that hurt and pain. 

Justin tries to roll away from me, but I won’t let him. Covering him with my body; an arm and leg on each side of him, I have him pinned under me. 

“Geeroffmebrian!” He squirms, words muffled. 

“Not,” I dodge his elbow from puncturing me, “until,” damn he’s willful “you listen to me!” I have to use my hand to slam his shoulder down to ensure he stays put. I’ve never been great with words, but I try my best.

“Justin, you only think you love me,” I say. 

“Why did you fuck me?” The words spill from his tongue, hanging loosely in the air and he glares at me defiantly, daring me to answer him. 

Fricking…fucking….dammit….

I’m stuck.

“That’s what I thought,” He uses my moment of hesitation to kick me firmly in the abs, knocking me off my bed and onto the floor. I land with a thud, as my ass plants itself on one of my spike shoes worn for soccer. 

Do you have any idea how badly that hurts?

“Ouch! Fuck Justin!” Out of anger because my perfect ass probably has puncture holes in it, I pick up the nearest thing next to me — a stray soccer ball — and throw it at him.

Oops. Crap.

“Brian!!!”

I didn’t mean to hit him in the face, but now his nose is bleeding all over the place and he’s panicking because Justin can be a real baby like that. 

“Here,” I quickly run in and out of the bathroom that connects to my room and hold a cold wet towel on his nose. There’s no swelling, but it sure as hell is bleeding a lot. 

“Is it stopping?” He asks, sounding nasally when I apply more pressure. 

“Almost.”

Both of us are quiet and there’s that weird awkwardness settling between us.

“I’m sorry Brian.”

“For what?” I say, dabbing at spots of blood that have smeared around his nose. 

“You know,” he winces when I press a little too hard, “for letting you make love to me and then thinking you’d change for me.” 

Why does he have to use those words? ‘Making love,’ ‘change for me.’ 

“It’s okay,” I answer, “I shouldn’t have fucked you.” 

“No,” he argues, “I just wanted to make you love me how I love you.”

“Justin,” most of the bleeding has stopped so I remove the rag and sit back, sighing as I talk to him, “you know I love you. I just won’t….I can’t — “

He shuts me up effortlessly by leaning in and kissing me, tentatively slipping his tongue into my mouth while deepening it. I’m getting hard again and can feel his erection brushing on the inside of my thigh. 

I am so fucked. 

Our tongues are licking at each other’s, desperate for the other’s taste and I just can’t help myself.

“Get on all fours,” I order, mostly to wipe that satisfied smirk off his face. 

Justin complies quickly, putting his ass towards me; face against the wooden headboard. I lean over him, cock rubbing between his cheeks. 

“Ready?” I ask in a low, hot voice. He nods vigorously, taking a couple of deep breaths. I feel for his hand, holding it as I start to slip inside him. He moans out as I shove myself up my ass fully, hips pressing against the backs of my thighs. “So tight…” I moan, fingers digging into his sides. 

“Uh, uhm, harder,” Justin commands, and I swear to God there is nothing hotter than fuck than to hear him beg. For me. 

He drops his head down on my pillow, ass still in the air for me to plow the hell out of and I do; harder then before and faster. I hear him vocally moan my name into the pillow, which makes me move faster; loving the feel of sliding in and out and my muscles tensing and pulling against him. 

“Oh, Oh God Brian!” He screams as we come together and I engage him in a sloppy wet kiss before collapsing next to him. 

We’re so close I can see my sticky cum between his thighs, and I can’t help feeling some sort of ownership, like I’ve claimed him or something. 

That he’s mine.